If she still wanted to see him.
A steady stream of customers kept him occupied until lunch when Audrey arrived, bringing her usual combination of chaos, humour and much-needed distraction.
Every hour that went by that Lottie hadn’t phoned was a good sign, Matt told himself. Tonight was still on.
At 3.30 Audrey announced she had to leave early, she was having a new television delivered. ‘Now I can watch those loose women in this thing called high definition,’ she’d announced. ‘The man in the shop says I’ll see all their wrinkles.’
At 3.55 – just as he’d been gearing up to mentally cheer the passing of another hour – his phone rang. And his heart lodged into the back of his throat when he saw who was calling.
Clearing his throat, he answered. ‘Hi.’
‘It’s me, Lottie.’ As if he didn’t immediately recognise her voice … or already have her saved as a contact. ‘I’m phoning about tonight.’
His heart slithered all the way down to his brogues. ‘I understand.’
There was a pause and he heard some barking in the background. ‘Yes, yes, I’m pleased to see you, too.’ A breathless laugh. ‘Sorry, I’m just climbing back in the van, your van, and Chewie’s expressing his delight at seeing me, even though I was only gone a few minutes. Hang on a sec.’ He imagined her putting down her toolbox. Maybe encouraging Chewie to take his paws off her. ‘Okay, now then, what do you understand?’
He took a breath and started to reorganise the pens. ‘That you want to cancel tonight.’
‘Well, I’m glad you understand, because I don’t. Why do I want to cancel?’
Because Henry’s back in your life. He couldn’t say the words, knew they’d make him sound like an insecure prick. And she didn’t sound like she was cancelling, so maybe he was making too much up in his head. ‘Sorry, I just assumed that was why you’d phoned.’
‘Nope, I wanted to check what time you were coming over, so I can make sure I’m back. Okay, confession time, also so I can make sure I’ve cleaned up by then. Obviously the mould and damp will still be there, just to set your expectations.’
He wondered if she’d cleaned up for Henry, or if she was so relaxed around her former lover, she didn’t feel she had to. ‘I’m coming to see you, Lottie, not your house. I want to cook for you, talk to you. Take you to bed and make love to you.’
He was pleased to hear her breath hitch. ‘You don’t care if the sheets are due for changing, the sofa’s full of dog hair and the kitchen bins are overflowing?’
‘No.’ Unconsciously he started reorganising the pens again. ‘How was Henry?’
‘On good form.’ She paused, and he hated how his heart thumped. ‘He’s down here for two weeks, so you’ll get to meet him.’
Briefly he shut his eyes, trying to find his calm. He felt adrift, a dinghy cut loose in a turbulent sea. All he kept thinking was, if only he’d had more time with her before Henry had come back into her life. ‘I’ll look forward to it.’
She laughed softly. ‘You might not when I tell you his first idea was that we all go windsurfing on Saturday.’
He didn’t need to ask if the guy was any good at it. What better way to show Lottie what she’d been missing? ‘I hope the second idea is better.’
‘The second idea is we go on Sunday instead.’
He winced, aware he was going to have to give the guy his moment. At least he’d be with Lottie, which had to be better than imagining what they were doing. ‘I’m starting to see a pattern.’ Just then the bell in the shop rang – he’d snuck the chime back as Audrey had left – and he looked up to see his dad walk in. ‘Sorry, I’ve got to go. I have an unexpected visitor.’
‘Julia Roberts? You know, from Notting Hill? Hugh Grant plays a bookshop owner and… Oh boy, you probably haven’t watched it, have you?’
‘Just because I don’t read romantic comedies doesn’t mean I haven’t watched the classics.’ He waved at his dad. ‘But actually, the visitor is Dad.’
There was a beat of silence, and when Lottie spoke again, he knew, just knew, she wasn’t as surprised as he was. ‘Well, you’d better see what he wants. I’ll see you later, with or without clean sheets and a tidy house.’
Smiling, he ended the call and turned to his dad. ‘This is a nice surprise.’
His dad shifted on his feet, looking … embarrassed? ‘Thought it was about time I helped out. Keep an eye on Audrey for you.’ He glanced around. ‘Is she here today?’
Suddenly the pieces slipped into place. Lottie insisting he take Audrey on, Lottie saying she didn’t think his dad’s issue with the shop was working for him. She’d planned this. Realised the old man wasn’t work shy, he was lacking confidence. Then shown him, through Audrey, that there was nothing to fear.
Silently he sent Lottie a prayer of thanks.
And slipped even further into love with her.
Chapter Twenty-Six
It was Sunday, the sun was out and Lottie was on the beach with three of her favourite males, yet she couldn’t, in all truth, say she was enjoying herself.
First there was Matt, who smiled in all the right places, listened, asked polite questions, but was back to the stilted, reserved Matt she’d first met. Not the caring, funny one she’d got to know. The one who’d turned up on Tuesday to cook for her with his ingredients in neat plastic pots. Salmon burgers with sweet-potato fries.
‘Proof that healthy doesn’t have to be boring,’ he’d said, his lips curving into a captivating smile.
Then there was Henry, who was his usual, chatty, charming self and yet … Lottie could feel the testosterone bouncing off him. It was competitive Henry who’d come out today, the one who saw Matt as a rival. Three times he’d asked Matt if he was sure he didn’t want to windsurf. Three times Matt had said he was happy watching and looking after Chewie.
Finally there was Chewie, who kept watching Matt, but seemed happy enough to chase balls thrown by Henry. It was as if he was telling her he liked Henry best, though Lottie thought it went deeper than that. He saw Matt as a threat to his position as top dog, but not Henry.
‘He’s nearly as good as you,’ Matt remarked as they watched Henry out on the water.
Lottie laughed. ‘Clearly you know nothing about windsurfing. He’s far better than me. California has been good for him.’
She was aware of Matt giving her a quiet study. ‘Do you ever regret not following him out there?’
‘What, to improve my windsurfing technique?’ He smiled, but she knew he saw behind her glib reply. ‘Regrets aren’t useful or healthy. Sure, at times I wobbled and wondered if I’d done the right thing but I refused to keep rehashing it. I made the decision and moved forward.’
‘I admire that.’ His gaze shifted out to sea. ‘Before I moved here my life was a long series of regrets. Things I wish I’d done differently.’
Her heart ached and she reached for his hand. ‘I told you before, you torture yourself too much. Amy’s so much happier now and I can see your dad’s started to come out of his grief. Much of that is down to you and your brave decision to move here.’
He gave her a sidelong glance. ‘It’s also thanks to you. You teased Amy out of her shell, and Shaun’s been good for her.’
‘Is this the same Shaun who suddenly finds himself with a month of solid work in your house, just when he needs to find a deposit for a flat?’
Matt avoided her eyes. ‘Amy needs an ensuite, I promised her one before we moved. And Dad needs a wet room so there’s nothing to trip over.’
She nudged at his shoulder. ‘And you’ve got a big heart, Matt Steele.’
He shook his head. ‘I’m getting work done for a reasonable rate by a guy I trust who makes my sister happy.’ He paused as they watched Henry turn smoothly back to shore. ‘Speaking of Dad, he’s helped out in the shop every afternoon this week.’
Lottie smiled. ‘That’s good, isn’t it?’
‘Oh yes. Gives me some time off, gives him a focus.’
He slid her a look, and her heart beat faster at the emotion in his eyes. ‘I have a feeling I’ve got you to thank.’
‘I only suggested Audrey work for you. Something you might not be thanking me for soon.’
His gaze wouldn’t leave hers, and she couldn’t explain how one simple look, one simple adoring look, could make her feel so dizzy, so choked. ‘To you it’s not a big deal. Another person you’ve helped, but to those you listen to, pay attention to, it can be a life changer,’ he said quietly. ‘I will always be grateful you came into our lives.’
Tears pricked and she struggled with how to respond. It was like he saw more in her than anyone else ever had.
‘Whoa, things look a bit serious here.’
She looked up with a start, unsure whether to be relieved or annoyed at the interruption. Henry was staring down at them, beads of water running down his face, eyes blue as the sky, his muscular frame outlined by the wet suit. He was like an advert for the Californian dream and yet … her skin didn’t shiver, her heart didn’t yearn. Her blood didn’t heat.
She thought it had once, but the memory had faded. All she knew for certain was that it didn’t now.
He peeled off the wet suit and rubbed himself down with the towel. He was more muscled than Matt; a gym body, not a runner’s body. ‘What’s with the serious faces?’
For once she was the one who didn’t know what to say, and Matt the one who found the words. ‘I was thanking Lottie for her help with my dad.’
‘Yeah?’ Henry plonked himself down on the picnic blanket opposite her. ‘She’s always been one to take care of the waifs and strays.’
The dismissive way he said it set Lottie’s teeth on edge. ‘Matt’s dad is hardly a waif or a stray.’
Henry laughed, running a hand through his wet hair as he turned to Matt. ‘Oops, sorry, buddy, didn’t mean that to come out like it did. I’m sure your dad’s a stand-up bloke. I just meant that Lottie’s always been soft-hearted.’
‘Generous-hearted.’ Matt kept his gaze steady on Henry. ‘She’s no pushover.’
Matt looked almost angry and she wanted to reassure him that Henry didn’t mean any slight, but Henry was talking again, clearly not put out by Matt’s quiet rebuke.
‘You’ll get no arguments from me on that score. I remember this one time…’ Henry started telling a tale from a few years ago, one of her first customers who’d ignored three reminders to pay his invoice. He’d been a shopkeeper and Lottie had gone to his shop, piled the most expensive items into her basket and started walking out without paying.
‘Lottie can tell it better than me.’ Henry grinned at her. ‘Go on, tell Matt what you said when the dude got all arsey about you pinching his stock.’
‘I said it’s not nice when someone tries to wriggle out of paying, is it?’
Henry chuckled. ‘Makes me laugh now, but I wasn’t laughing when she told me.’
The memories flooded back. ‘You were livid I’d gone to face him on my own.’
‘Too right I was. You’re five foot and a bit, he was well over six foot. I made you promise that next time you’d let me deal with it.’
‘I didn’t promise that,’ she reminded him. ‘I agreed to tell you what I was doing, so you could be there for backup if needed.’
‘Yeah, yeah, always so independent.’ He rolled his eyes. ‘Drove me nuts.’
‘I needed to prove I could run the business on my own.’ She wondered how many years it would be before she could stare at her image in the mirror and say, You did it, girl. You showed them. You’re a success. Living in a dump, having to borrow a van off Matt, it didn’t say Be proud. But she was working on it.
‘Prove to who?’ Matt asked, though she suspected from the way he looked at her that he already knew the answer.
‘Myself, mainly, but now I think about it, I’d be really happy to get a call from some of my old teachers, especially old Dragon Lady or Mr Zit. Show them I did make something of myself.’
‘Zit?’ Henry asked.
‘Real name was Mr Whitehead.’
He laughed. ‘Good one.’
But when she glanced at Matt, he was quietly appraising her. He understands, she realised, thinking back to what he’d told her of his own schooldays and the bullies he’d felt the need to prove something to.
‘God, I’m starving.’ Henry jumped to his feet. ‘I could murder a sausage roll. Does that greasy spoon café still do them?’
‘It does.’ She shot Matt a look of apology. ‘But it also does non-artery-clogging alternatives.’
Matt wanted to dislike Henry, but it was hard to when the guy was like a male version of Lottie – easy-going, likeable. Except he didn’t have Lottie’s empathy, her ability to read people, because if he did he would have understood why her business was so important to her. And if he had, he’d also have understood why she couldn’t follow him to America, and would surely have waited for a job opportunity closer to home.
‘You’re one of those healthy-eating types?’
Matt glanced up to find Henry staring at the grilled chicken wrap on his plate. ‘I’m not sure we’re a type.’
He eyed the half-eaten sausage roll on Henry’s plate, and on Lottie’s. He didn’t feel envious because he wanted to eat one. He felt envious because it emphasised how similar Lottie and Henry were.
And how different he was.
‘Matt likes to look after his arteries,’ Lottie supplied, smiling at him with, he thought, fondness. ‘We should probably do the same.’
Henry laughed. ‘I know, but can you imagine not eating fish and chips?’ Matt watched as Henry’s face sobered. ‘Some of my best times have been you and me on this beach, eating fish and chips.’
Matt couldn’t take any more. The shared memories, the expression of adoration on Henry’s face as he looked at Lottie. He stood abruptly. ‘Sorry, I just need to … make a call.’
He strode away from the picnic bench they’d been sitting on and set off down the prom, acutely aware they were both watching him. Lottie was probably confused, Henry probably thinking, Yeah, nothing to fear here. Lottie will soon realise the guy’s a nut job.
Belatedly he realised he was meant to be phoning, but his damn phone was in his jacket pocket, on the bench. Still, he couldn’t stomach the idea of going back yet. Not to listen to Henry relate one more anecdote from their past. Nor to see how good they were together, how well matched. How much Henry still cared for her, though he didn’t fully appreciate her, which angered Matt. She deserved someone who saw her for everything she was, not just the gorgeous blonde, or the fun girl who made everyone laugh, or the businesswoman equally at ease with a toolbox or a windsurf board. There was a special side to her, the one who’d created a real support group from a simple book club. Who’d saved Gira’s marriage, welcomed Amy into the fold, helped make Audrey feel useful again. Given his dad the subtle push he’d needed.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he wasn’t aware Lottie had followed him. Not until he felt her arms circle his waist from behind.
‘Hey.’ His heart thumped against his ribs as she looked up at him, eyes full of concern. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing.’ He forced a smile. ‘Needed to check on Dad, that’s all.’
‘What, by mental telepathy? Because I know you keep your phone in the inside pocket of your jacket. Which is still with Henry and Chewie.’ She grasped his hand and tugged him to the nearby bench. ‘Talk to me, Matt.’
One of the hardest things anyone could ever ask of him. ‘He wants you back, doesn’t he?’
Lottie drew in a breath, then let it out slowly, her hand still clasped around his. ‘He says he wants a second chance, yes.’
Even though he’d known, Matt felt the bottom fall out of his stomach. ‘He still loves you.’ He said it as a fact, because it was obvious, but Lottie answered anyway.
‘So he says, yes.’
His throat was tight, his chest tighter. Matt knew he had to ask the question, even thou
gh the answer terrified him. ‘Do you still love him?’
Her hand slipped from his and she drew her feet up on the bench, hugging her knees. ‘I still have feelings for him, yes.’
Suddenly his heart felt heavy in his chest, dragged down by a sense of inevitability. ‘When does he start his new job?’
‘He’s here until next Sunday. I’ve invited him to the book club.’ She smiled. ‘I can’t wait to see what he makes of Audrey.’
‘From what I’ve seen, he’ll charm her.’ Jealousy bit. It had taken him six months to feel comfortable with the group, yet he already knew Henry would fit in easily. That Audrey would love him.
Silence descended and they both stared out at the horizon, watching the small waves churn up the beach, dragging the pebbles into the sea. He sensed she was thinking carefully about what to say next, how to avoid upsetting him. ‘I’m busy next week.’ Her head jerked to look at him and he knew his bald statement had come out too strong, too blunt. ‘Stock taking,’ he added, doing his best to give her a wry smile. ‘Not my favourite job.’ Nor one that needed doing for several months, but it was good to get a head start on it.
As he watched her eyes scan his face, the clear grey against her blonde hair made his breath catch, as it did every time he looked at her. ‘I could help. I’m a whizz at counting.’
His chest ached as he imagined them doing the task together. How much fun she’d make it. She won’t still be with you by then. ‘Thanks, but it’s a specialist job.’ He smiled to show he was joking, then reached for her hand, raising it to his lips for a brief kiss before settling it on his thigh. ‘I think you need to spend the time with Henry,’ he added quietly.
She bit into her lip, eyes looking huge in her face. ‘It feels like you’re pushing me away.’
His heart stuttered and unconsciously his hand gripped tighter to hers. ‘No, not at all.’ How to explain that he’d fallen in love with her, without her feeling pressured? Plus he’d already lost one woman to another man. He knew how much it hurt. He couldn’t bear the thought of her leaving him for Henry further down the road. ‘You owe it to yourself, to both of you, to take the time to get to know each other again.’ Each word felt like a knife through his chest. ‘See if you still feel the same as you did two years ago.’
The Beach Reads Book Club: The most heartwarming and feel good summer holiday read of 2021! (The Kathryn Freeman Romcom Collection, Book 5) Page 23
