Cam's Chance (Arrowtown Series Book 5)

by Lisa Oliver

  Cam snorted, and then he chuckled, his big body shaking. Fergus could feel all the tension in his mate’s shoulders easing and he gave himself a mental head slap. His mate had been through a rough night, and probably hadn’t had a wink of sleep. And that night, morning, whatever, wasn’t over.

  “Babe,” Fergus said when Cam’s chuckles died off, and the two men were just enjoying being in each other’s arms. “You said momma had been hurt. How bad is it? Will she ever heal? What about my siblings – did the council find them? Give it to me straight.”

  After a long sigh, Cam pulled free of Fergus’s arms and sat up, reaching for Fergus’s hands and enclosing them in his own. “Your momma will live,” he said gravely. “She had a mass of internal injuries and lost a lot of blood. Seth came in, you remember young Seth, the half-fae? Well, he came in, and healed as much as he could of your momma’s insides, the bruises and the cuts on her face and she’s breathing a lot better now. But Seth’s healing can only work on what’s there.”

  “Her legs?” Fergus remembered how they’d been covered when Cam was holding her back at the compound.

  “The bastard sliced away some of her leg muscles, like he was hobbling her or some sick thing. Doc worked on her for over three hours, trying to piece some of the fragments back together, but in the end, she gave him permission to amputate.”

  Fergus gasped, his eyes filling with tears. “Both of them?”

  Cam nodded. “One above the knee and one below about mid-calf. It was the only way. With all the damage she’d sustained, she couldn’t shift and some of the injuries were at least a week old. Doc explained all of that to her, told her that with her legs damaged like they were, if he just patched her up, it was unlikely she could ever shift. I’m sorry, I wanted to talk to you about that too, but you were still sleeping and so your momma asked me what I thought you’d want. I said, I told her that you’d just want her to smile again, and Doc said that was the best way to do it.”

  It was Fergus’s turn to nod as he quelled his emotions, determined to focus on the future instead of what had been done to his loving momma. “Thank you. You did the right thing, said the right thing. I’m just sorry you had to…”

  Cam stroked over Fergus’s fingers, his cheeks red. “When I saw her, lying there back at the compound, covered in rags and stinking of blood. I told her who I was and why I was there, and do you know what she said?”

  “What did she say?” It had to have been something special to make his military man blush.

  “She said, now we were mated, that she was my momma too.” Cam looked up and Fergus was startled to see his stoic mate was in tears. “I’ve never had a momma before. And now, now when I finally get one, I had to suggest she have her legs amputated.” Cam was sobbing now, heaving gulps and masses of tears. “Life is so unfair. She never did anything in her life to deserve what was done to her.”

  “Hey, hey.” Fergus pushed himself up, latching hold of his mate’s shoulders, hugging him tight. “It’s okay, it’s all right. You did the right thing. Momma would never be truly happy if she could never shift again. At least now she can, can’t she?”

  Cam’s head nodded jerkily. “Doc gave her a light sedative, just after the operation was done. She was able to shift within half an hour and most of the surgical wounds are already healed.”

  “Then that’s great news.” Fergus hunted for his brightest smile and slapped it on. “And babe, if you haven’t had a momma before, then you are in for a treat. Am I going to grill you endlessly about your life growing up at another time? You bet your sweet ass, I am. But when it came to handing out mommas, my momma is the best one anyone could have. You’ll see. Now, we need to go and see her. Do I have any…?”

  “You’re not worried about your momma losing her legs, or my part in it all?” The weight of Cam’s body stopped Fergus getting out of bed, which was his intention. Fergus allowed it, because it was clear Cam was still struggling and he had to fix that first.

  “She’s still momma.” Fergus struggled to find the right words. “Babe, she’s alive and that’s a huge blessing. If I know our momma, within a week, she’ll either be organizing wheelchair races down main street or running my bakery. I don’t care which. But for decades, that woman had to pay a horrible price for giving her heart to the wrong asshole when she was young. But she always told me I was worth every tear. And this other shit, her life in the fold, losing her other kids – you watch. She will bounce back, and do you know why?”

  Cam shook his head.

  “Because the person who made me Fabulous Fergus was the Magnificent Marybelle and now she’s free, she’ll be even more amazing. Now, come on and move yourself. I need to dress, food would be nice, and then we’re both going to see our momma with big smiles on our faces, right? No doom and gloom around momma.”

  “No doom and gloom.” Cam still looked unsure, but he did move, after squeezing Fergus tight one more time. Fergus would work on his mate. When Cam got a full blast of Marybelle’s magnificence, he’d understand.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  There was a tiny nagging voice in the back of Cam’s head asking him if there was something wrong with his mate’s ability to mentally process difficult situations. In the space of just two days, two days mind you, Fergus learned he could breathe fire when he got angry, turn into a big-assed purple dragon; he’d flown over two hundred miles on his first shift with passengers clinging to his back, and then woke up to find out his darling momma had lost both of her legs. That’s without seeing the dead bodies of his ex-fold, coping with the hurt Cam had inflicted on him with his wretched note, and all the other upheaval that came from being a new mate. Why wasn’t he curled up in a heap in my arms crying his eyes out or angrily pacing and threatening to knock my head off?

  Watching Fergus chat happily with his momma, there was no sign of any breakdown. In fact, there was no sign of stress in his mate or his mate’s momma. Marybelle was sitting upright in her bed, her hair combed nicely, and while her face was still pale, no one would ever guess she’d been a bleeding wreck of a prisoner less than twelve hours before.

  Mrs. Hooper had apparently been over and introduced herself, producing a lovely night gown and a bundle of other clothes for Marybelle to wear. And now Fergus and Marybelle were discussing Mrs. Hooper’s offer for Marybelle to stay with her for a while, until she got used to living in a shifter town.

  “You could stay with me and Cam in my house, if you’re not keen on being alone, momma. You don’t have to go to Mrs. Hooper’s.” Fergus was sitting on the edge of Marybelle’s bed, as bright eyed and gorgeous as he was any other day of the week.

  “You and your fine hunk of a man are newly mated.” Marybelle laughed and winked at Cam. “I can still see you through the day, but Mrs. Hooper has been very kind, offering to let me to stay in her home. It will be lovely, having another older woman around to talk to. She’s a Texas Longhorn you know, so we’re almost related.”

  “Mrs. Hooper’s offer is lovely, momma, but I want to help you.” Fergus was stroking his momma’s hand. “I haven’t seen you in so long. I’m worried…”

  “You silly boy,” Marybelle reached up, touching Fergus’s jaw line. “You have nothing to worry about, not when it comes to me. I will be fine, and so will you. Now pay attention, we need to be serious for a minute.”

  Cam’s animal went on alert. He’d been sitting in the corner of the room, trying to let Marybelle and Fergus have some time together, but being close enough to lend support if needed.

  “What is it, momma? What did you need?” Fergus wasn’t smiling anymore.

  “I don’t need anything,” Marybelle said firmly. “You, my precious son, have done enough already. I know you’ve wanted me out of that fold for more years than we want to count, and I know how much I disappointed you, in not leaving sooner. But I made my choices based on what I thought was best at the time, and I will now live with the consequences of those choices.”

  Fergus looked as i
f he was going to argue, but Marybelle held up her hand. “No, you need to hear this and this will be the last time we will be talking about it so make sure you listen carefully. I don’t want you blaming yourself for what’s happened to me or the fold members.”

  Cam frowned. Is that what Fergus is doing? It doesn’t show on his face.

  Marybelle wasn’t finished. “I don’t ever regret you being born; I don’t regret pushing you out of the fold boundaries all those years ago, and I don’t regret staying with the fold to keep you safe. I don’t regret the two sweet boys I gave birth to after you were gone even if the circumstances of their conception is something I’d rather not think about. The thing is, Fergus my lovely, I know what you’re like. You are going to see me getting around without my legs and find some way to blame yourself. It is not your fault.”

  “But…”

  “No buts.” Marybelle shook her head. “The day I held you in my arms for the first time was the happiest day of my existence, bar none. I have always seen you as the rainbow of my heart, the promise of a better life to come. And that promising future starts today. So, we will have no tears, no misguided guilt thinking you need to hover over me every five minutes, waiting on me hand and foot. I am going to stay with Mrs. Hooper and spend some time getting used to being away from the fold. I will grieve, in my own way, for the children I had, who never made it to school age, and then I will get on with forging a new life for myself.”

  “Can’t I be a part of that life?” Cam tensed. For the first time since entering the room, Fergus sounded close to tears. “I’ve missed you for so long and the thought of not being near you now...”

  “You will always be a huge part of my new life.” Marybelle smiled and it was as wide and open as Fergus’s usually was. “You and Cam are my beloved sons, but you are also grown men with lives of your own to lead. I know you built your bakery with me in mind and while we might have to lower the counter tops a bit, I will be in there before you know it, ordering you out, because you being with your mate is the most important thing in the world. I’m not leaving you. I’m never going to leave you again. But I must learn to stand, or sit, with my own two stumps, and Mrs. Hooper can help me with that. The best thing you can do to help me, is to be happy for me. Can you do that my Fabulous Fergus?”

  Cam could see Fergus was struggling, could feel the tension now through their bond. But after a long minute, his wonderful mate straightened his shoulders and pasted on the biggest, and in Cam’s opinion, fakest smile. “I am happy for you momma. I’m so happy you’re here.”

  “And seeing your darling face means more to me than you can ever know. Now it’s time for you to go.” Marybelle laid back on her pillows. She did look tired. “Mrs. Hooper will be here shortly with my dinner and I doubt she made enough for you two. After that, her sons are going to help move me to her house so the good doctor can have his bed back. You two need to get off home. You can come and visit tomorrow, after you’ve rested and taken care of yourselves. Have either of you even thought about the bakery or the bar today?”

  “We have been a little bit busy, and Fergus was asleep for most of the day,” Cam said as he stood up. Walking over, he rested his hand on Fergus’s shoulder. “But the townspeople are very good at covering during a family crisis. I know you’ll be very happy here, Ma… momma, and you know everyone including us, will help all we can. Come on, babe, let momma rest.”

  Fergus was torn – Cam could feel it in the sudden tension in his shoulders. But Marybelle tilted her head slightly, the shake so tiny it was easily missed. Fergus’s nod was just as minute, and Cam wondered at the strength of their bond after so long apart. His smile still so fake it reeked of plastic, Fergus leaned over, kissing his momma on the cheek and patting her hand. When he stood and moved out of the way, Cam did the same, feeling a bit self-conscious when he did it, but it was worth it to see Marybelle’s smile.

  “Have fun you two.” Marybelle waved and she was still smiling as they left the room.

  Cam kept his concerns to himself until they got outside. Doc’s surgery was only two doors down from the bar, so the walk to Fergus’s house was short. But as they ambled along, hand in hand, the change in Fergus, the way his smile was now a lot more natural meant Cam just had to ask. “Don’t you and your momma ever let anything faze you? Get you down? Upset you?”

  Fergus scrunched his face. “What would be the point in carrying all that negativity?”

  “Negative emotions are just as valid as positive ones,” Cam huffed. “You don’t have any issue showing when you’re happy, and even on the odd occasion when you’re sad. But why is anger, despair, and frustration an issue for you?”

  Fergus grinned as he looked up. “I thought sad and despair were the same things.”

  “You know what I’m talking about and to me, they aren’t. Sad is something that happens when your pet dies. Despair is thinking you’ll never own a pet again.”

  “I don’t have a pet,” Fergus said easily, swinging their joined hands as they walked along. “With my hours, and yours, it would be impossible to keep a pet happy.”

  “Fergus! You’re deliberately misunderstanding my point.” Cam stopped walking, spinning his mate around so they were facing each other. “Don’t you ever let anything bother you? Show some anger, stamp your feet or throw something at a wall?”

  “I don’t mean to tease you. I do understand you’re worried about me, but you shouldn’t be.” Fergus’s hand was warm where it rested on Cam’s chest. “I’ve never seen the point in hanging on to negative emotions. They weigh you down, and when they do that, they tarnish every aspect of your life, every decision, every interaction. Who would choose to live like that?”

  Cam had a strong feeling Fergus wasn’t understanding the point he was trying to make. “I know I don’t have to tell you that life isn’t always easy – I’ve seen and heard some of the shit you’ve been through. But babe, getting frustrated, or angry is a natural part of life. It’s okay to show it especially in front of someone you trust, like your mate.”

  “And I do trust you. But the last time I expressed that anger, Brown almost lost his clothes. Babe, what would you have me do? I am pissed beyond comprehension at what’s happened to my momma. The sight of those dead fold members, some of whom I was related to don’t forget, will haunt me for a long time, and I could cheerfully resurrect that fold leader just so I could stomp on his head until it looked like a pile of cow dung.”

  That’s more like it. Cam nodded to show he was listening.

  “I had a long time to think when I was flying, and don’t think I haven’t been angry about my absent father and his flashy genetics on occasion too, especially recently. He could have at least tried to find me after all these years, and he never bothered. But what does me being angry do? What does it achieve?”

  Cam had to think for a minute. “It would show the people around you, that you were understandably affected by what happened to you and momma,” he said cautiously.

  “But what would that achieve?” Fergus persisted. “Being angry in the moment is perfectly understandable, and in case you missed it, my dragon was angry you’d gone to the fold without us, and even doubly pissed off at those damn council guards who tried to arrest you again. But we’re home now. The fold leader is dead, and yes unfortunately, so is the rest of the fold, but I can’t do anything about that. Momma is here, wanting to live with Mrs. Hooper which I’m not sure about, but I’m just glad she’s alive and well enough to make that decision for herself. You’re here, safe, giving me a lecture in the middle of the footpath, and while I’d rather you kissed me, and held onto me as though I was someone precious, I understand you have anger you need to express, so I’m letting you talk to me like this in the hopes you’ll let it go when you’re done.”

  Cam wasn’t sure he’d heard his mate correctly. “You’re letting me express my anger, so I’ll let it go?”

  Fergus showed his teeth and nodded. “Giving you an outlet. You se
e, someone like me, who’s had years of experience in shaking off negativity, can do it by acknowledging it, knowing I can’t do anything about the circumstances, and letting them go. It’s a subconscious thing, but it works for me. You’re not wired the same way. You cling onto your emotions, holding them tight to your chest, so you need some way to ease that tension. Talking helps. Getting naked and pounding me into the mattress would probably be better, but we’re standing on the footpath.”

  “You can’t just shake things off.” Cam’s voice rose, even as the thought of pounding Fergus’s butt made his cock tingle. “People died. I almost got arrested. You flew, for fuck’s sake. Your momma lost her legs today. She’ll never walk again!”

  “I know.” Fergus looked so impossibly calm Cam wanted to shake him. “But what can I do about any of those things? Will being angry raise the fold members from the dead? Will ranting about how unfair life is, bring momma back her legs, or grant her the ability to walk?”

  “Well, no.” Cam had a suspicion he was the one missing something now, but he didn’t know what it was.

  “Then there’s no point in me hanging onto my anger about it.” Fergus shrugged and then sighed. “Imagine this. Let’s say I was hanging onto my anger about momma’s situation, and Rocky came into the bakery complaining because I had sold out of eclairs, which he does at least once a day. Instead of feeling pride, or joy, because Rocky loves my baking so much, and teasing him about him having to find another excuse to escape Mal in twenty minutes so he can test a fresh batch, I’d probably snap at him, or worse. What if I started yelling at him for being so selfish because all he ever cared about was his eclair obsession? What if I told him how fat he was getting and how I had far too much to do to be worried about the eclair needs of one wolf?”

  Cam had seen Rocky eat. It wouldn’t be any more than the wolf deserved. But Fergus wasn’t finished.

  “He’d storm out and I’d probably lose a customer. By getting angry at Rocky, my mood would get worse and I’d probably snap at a lot of other customers too. Later, I’d close the shop and come down to the bar, and instead of smiling at you, I’d snap at you and probably refuse to even kiss you hello. I’d be grumpy and snarl at anyone who got close to me, and I’d be getting more tired too, because anger is a heavy emotion to carry around. So, my mood would get even worse again and by the time you and I got home, we wouldn’t be speaking to each other, because my bad mood would make you grumpy too.”