Twisted Devotion: A Fae Paranormal Romance

by Jessi Elliott

  I narrow my eyes, then flick a glance at Jackson. “I’m fine. I’ll be . . .” Tears clog my throat, so I quickly divert the subject, and return my gaze to Seth. “How are you feeling?”

  “Nervous. A little hungry.”

  I roll my eyes in response.

  “What? You know I eat like a bear when I am stressed,” Seth says.

  Taking a deep breath, I feed him the line I’ve heard the staff use many times since starting this job. “You don’t need to worry. Jackson’s team is very good at what they do, and the positive outcome rate is extremely high.”

  Seth blinks at me, and then we both burst out laughing.

  “Okay,” Jackson says softly from behind me. “If you’re ready, Seth, we should get this show on the road.”

  Panic seizes me, and Seth notices immediately, squeezing my hand again. “Hey,” he murmurs. “Look at me. It is going to be fine.”

  I blink hard and force my eyes to his. “Don’t die,” I say, my jaw clenched so tight my gums ache.

  He pulls me into a hug and kisses the side of my head. “I will not.”

  When I pull back and straighten, I offer Seth a watery smile, biting my lip to keep it from trembling. I’m fighting one of the toughest battles of my life just trying to be strong for him, and that strength is wavering quickly.

  Jackson’s hand touches the small of my back, and I turn, allowing him to guide me out of the room.

  Once the door is closed, I press a fist against my mouth to muffle the sob trying to scream free.

  “Keep walking,” Jackson says at my ear, sliding his arm around my waist and directing me toward the back door to the staff parking lot.

  I stop at the door and dig my heels in. “I should be in there with him.”

  Jackson glances down at me, shaking his head. “You need to let out what’s inside. Pushing down the emotions raging through you right now isn’t safe for anyone.”

  I shoot him a look, but he doesn’t react. Maybe he wasn’t goading me . . .

  “Come on,” he says, pushing the door open. “Let’s head over to the training space and work some of that tension out.”

  My eyes narrow at him, trying to find the angle he’s playing, but I come up blank. He doesn’t smirk or blatantly check me out like he’s done in the past. He’s not trying to get in my pants. He genuinely wants to help.

  “Okay,” I finally say on an exhale, walking through the door.

  As soon as thirty minutes have passed since Jax and I left the facility, I call Bethany from the training warehouse. She wouldn’t normally work today, but I asked her to be there for Seth’s procedure. She’s been nothing but kind to me since I started working with Jackson, and I trust her to tell me the truth.

  “Hey, Kelsey,” she says in a warm tone. “How are you holding up?”

  “Going crazy. Is he out yet?” I chew my bottom lip, tapping my foot against the end of the treadmill.

  “Uhhh, give me a sec and I’ll go check.” The cheesy classical music plays while she has me on hold, and a minute later, she comes back on the line. “Not yet. I’ll give you a call as soon as he is, though.”

  My heartbeat kicks up. “It’s been over half an hour. Why isn’t he out yet?”

  Jackson sidles up beside me and takes the phone out of my hand. He says goodbye to Bethany before ending the call and sticking my phone in his back pocket before I can reach for it.

  I narrow my eyes at him, taking a step back. “What the hell?”

  “You need to relax, Red. Talking Bethany’s ear off isn’t going to make the procedure go any faster.”

  “Why is it taking so long? He should be done by now.”

  He sighs. “It works a little differently on each fae, Kelsey. It’s nothing to get worked up over.”

  “We should go back.”

  “So you can stand outside the room in full panic mode?” he questions.

  “I . . .” Damn. He’s right. And I hate that he’s right. Going back now won’t help anything. It’ll likely just make my anxiety worse.

  Jackson moves closer, and even though we’re the only ones around, the giant room feels small. He rests his hands on my shoulders and searches my eyes. “Tell me what you need.”

  I hold my chin up, meeting his gaze as I whisper, “I need my best friend to survive this.”

  He nods. “I know, Red, I know.” Jackson hauls me against him and kisses my hair before smoothing his hand down it.

  I grab fistfuls of his shirt and bury my face in his chest, inhaling the soft scent of eucalyptus and mint that I’ve gotten used to associating with him. “I need you to take me away from this place for a while.”

  Jackson leans back, gazing down at me with a slightly confused expression. “What?”

  I lick my lips. “I need you . . . to take care of me.” I brush my thumb along his bottom lip. “Like—like you did last time.”

  His eyes widen slightly. “Are you sure?”

  Nodding, I lean up on my tiptoes and seal my mouth over his, kissing him desperately.

  He tugs me closer and groans against my lips when I press against his groin. “Slow down, Red,” he says against my lips.

  “Make me,” I taunt.

  He gently wraps his fingers around my throat and pulls back, his eyes flashing with heat. “Oh, I plan to.” When he leans in again, his lips line up with mine, but instead of kissing me, he trails his mouth along my jaw, sucking and biting softly, making me moan.

  I inhale when he nips my earlobe then pulls it into his mouth. “Oh god.” The heat between my legs throbs with need, and I grab his other hand and press it there. “Please—”

  My phone starts ringing before I can finish the sentence, and I break away from Jackson, reaching around him to pull my phone out of his pocket. Heart lurching at the facility’s number, I swipe the screen to accept the call.

  “Seth’s out of the procedure,” Bethany says. “He’s okay. Did great, actually.”

  I press my palm against my chest as if that will help calm my racing heart. “Oh, thank god.” Tears well in my eyes. “We’ll be right back.” I end the call and pocket my phone before looking at Jackson. “Did you hear?”

  He nods, smiling. “What did I tell you?”

  I smack his arm, sniffling, and wipe my cheeks from the tears that snuck out while I was on the phone. “Thank you, for—”

  “Taking care of you?” he interjects.

  I press my lips together. “Yeah.”

  He slides his arm around my shoulders and hugs me to his side. “Come on, Red. I’ll take you to see him.”

  Seth is sitting up in the recovery room bed when I rush into the room. Before I can make it to his side, Jackson wraps his fingers around my wrist and pulls me back a stride. Before I can snap at him, he speaks.

  “Be careful,” he murmurs in my ear before letting me go.

  I slow my pace and approach the bed, smiling with trepidation at my best friend. He looks the same, though that doesn’t shock me. Fae look human anyway. His eyes appear tired and his white-blond hair is tied back in a messy bun, but other than that, he looks good. Strong.

  He’s human.

  “Hey there,” I say, not surprised at this point that my eyes are filling with tears again.

  “Hey there,” he echoes in a groggy voice.

  “How are you feeling?” I ask, reaching toward him, but I wait for him to take my hand. When he does, and gives it a little squeeze, I feel a million times better—like I can finally breathe.

  “Exhausted, but in a good way. It is weird. I do not see auras or feel emotions anymore, which is odd but nice. It lets me focus on other things.”

  “I’m going to chat with one of the technicians,” Jackson says. “I’ll leave the two of you to chat.”

  Once Jax is out of the room, Seth smiles at me.

  “What?” I ask.

  “He did not take his eyes off you for a second the entire time he was in the room.”

  My pulse ticks unevenly, and I�
�m glad Seth can no longer hear it. “Don’t worry about that. Just focus on recovering from the procedure.”

  His mouth kicks up. “You like him,” he accuses in a tired voice.

  “Oh, hush. You’re all hyped up on pain meds.”

  Seth smiles. “You like him greatly. It’s all over your face.”

  I shrug. “Fine. I like him. But only like forty-three percent of the time.”

  He laughs, then winces, sucking in a sharp breath and squeezing his eyes shut for a moment.

  I pull my hand back and gasp. “Shit. I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

  Waving my concern away, he pulls me back down to sit on the edge of the bed. “I’m fine, just a little achy all over.”

  I nod. “That usually lasts a few days, but the worst should be over in the first twenty-four hours. We’ll keep you overnight to make sure everything is fine, and I’m sure Tristan has you all set up to finish your recovery at the hotel.”

  “Yes. I spoke to Skylar earlier today.”

  “Good.” I glance around the room. “I’ll have them bring in a cot so I have somewhere to sleep.”

  He arches a brow at me. “You have a place to sleep. In your bed.” He smirks. “Or Jackson’s.”

  Rolling my eyes, I shake my head. “I’m staying with you.”

  “No, you are not. Skylar said you were on duty tonight.”

  “I’ll get someone to cover me,” I tell him. “It’s not a big deal.”

  “It’s not,” he agrees, “which is why you don’t need to sleep on an uncomfortable bed. Tristan and Aurora will be here to check on me later.”

  “What about Adam?” I counter.

  “Allison and Monica are babysitting,” he answers.

  I sigh. “Fine. But I’m only going under the condition that I’m coming back first thing tomorrow.”

  Seth smiles at me, and the tightness in my chest releases its grip. “Deal.”

  After hugging him for ten minutes straight, I finally leave the recovery room and find Jackson in his office. “We can head home,” I say. “Tristan and Aurora are coming to stay with him tonight. I’ll come back in the morning.”

  We walk out of the office together after I stop by reception and thank Bethany for being here today. She gives me a quick hug, and the three of us head out to the parking lot together. We walk Bethany to her car and then head toward Jackson’s.

  “Hey, Red?” Jackson says, and I turn to him just in time to catch the keys he tosses to me.

  I manage a tired smile as I unlock the Escalade and get behind the wheel. I can’t help but feel this is a big deal. He’s finally letting me drive his damn car.

  I click my buckle in place before sliding the key into the ignition and let out a breath.

  What a freaking day.

  Exhaustion rolls through me like a wave, and I can’t wait to get home and fall into bed.

  Chapter 19

  We’re about halfway back to Jackson’s when the music stops, interrupted by an incoming call from Allison.

  I press the answer button on the steering wheel and say, “Hey, what’s up?”

  “Hey, Kelsey. I tried your cell, but you didn’t answer. We need to talk.” Her voice is strained.

  “What happened? Are you all right?”

  There’s murmuring on the other side of the line that I can’t make out, and then Allison says, “Where are you?”

  I glance sideways at Jackson, but he doesn’t say anything. “We’re almost home.”

  “We’re sending a security team to relieve you first thing tomorrow.”

  My pulse jumps. “Why?”

  “I don’t know how to say this,” she murmurs hesitantly.

  I grip the steering wheel so tight my knuckles turn white. “Can you figure it out, please? You’re scaring me.”

  “I’m so sorry, I—” she cuts off, sniffling.

  Is she crying?

  “Allison,” I repeat in a firm tone, “tell me what’s going on.”

  “Maybe I should drive over there so we can talk,” she says in a small voice.

  My rapidly climbing blood pressure doesn’t have time for that. “Tell me what’s going on right now.” Desperation creeps into my tone, and I clench my jaw against the sound of it.

  Silence fills the line, and then her voice comes through. “Kyle is dead.”

  I slam on the brakes to narrowly avoid rear-ending the car in front of us and swear under my breath. “What did you just say?” My voice cracks.

  She sucks in a breath. “We received a report from one of Nikolai’s contacts on the police force. They found Kyle in his apartment this morning.”

  Fingers aching from gripping the wheel so tightly, I switch lanes to turn off the main road and press my foot down on the gas, heading toward Kyle’s place.

  Jackson’s voice is soft when he says, “Kelsey—”

  “Don’t,” I bite out.

  “What happened, Allison?” he asks.

  “It looks like it was the same people who ambushed your foster family, Kels. From the sounds of it, they recently got out of jail. They were looking for you and it seems as though they found Kyle in connection with you. His apartment was completely torn apart, like they were looking for something. Most likely money. We think they figured you and Kyle would have whatever was left from your foster parents’ fortune from inheritance when they died.”

  No. Oh god, no.

  This can’t be. He can’t be dead because of me, because I came back into his life. Something else happened. This can’t be it.

  Why would they be looking for me?

  They already took everything.

  I blink quickly as tears gather in my eyes, blurring my vision. “I have to go,” I say and end the call before she can protest. Forcing the tears down, I swallow hard and adjust my grip on the wheel.

  “Maybe you should pull over and let me drive,” Jackson suggests calmly.

  “No,” I croak, my mind going a million miles an hour—about as quickly as my heart is breaking.

  Jackson sighs. “Pull over, Kelsey. I don’t need you crashing my car and giving us both whiplash.”

  “I’m not stopping,” I tell him, keeping my eyes on the road as I make another haphazard turn.

  He reaches over and rests his hand on top of mine. “Kelsey.”

  Son of a—

  I want to close my eyes and get lost in the sound of his voice, have it wrap me up and keep me safe from the terrible people who destroyed my human life. But I’m not human anymore, they are—and I’m going to make them pay for all they’ve taken from me.

  Anger grips me as tight as a boa constrictor and my chest is heavy, filled with despair I’m struggling to keep in. If I start screaming, I’m worried I’ll never be able stop.

  “Kelsey, please.” Jackson’s voice is the only thing that breaks through the jumble of thoughts racing through my head.

  My breathing comes in quick, shallow breaths, my chest rising and falling unevenly. Finally, I let out a heavy, trembling sigh and pull the car off to the side of the road, shifting it into park.

  Jackson moves his hand away, and the moment it’s gone, I completely lose it.

  A scream tears itself loose from my throat as my hands curl into fists and pound the steering wheel with such force it’s a miracle the leather doesn’t burst at the seams from the impact.

  Jackson doesn’t try to stop me.

  I continue until my fingers are throbbing and already starting to bruise, until my face is wet with tears and my chest is shaking with sobs I can’t hold in any longer.

  My foster brother—the boy who always looked out for me, the boy I left behind—is dead.

  I can’t keep my hands lifted any longer. They hit the wheel one last time, then fall to my lap, filled with sharp, shooting pain that radiates into my wrists. I deserve far worse. Leaning forward until my forehead touches the wheel, tears continue to stream down my face. My nose is stuffed and running, making me sniffle every five seconds.

 
; “I’m sorry, Kelsey.” Jackson’s voice barely reaches me now, and I don’t respond.

  I jump when his hand touches my knee, straightening and turning my face to look at him. “I did this,” I cry softly. “He’s dead because I wanted to be in his life. He’s dead because of me.”

  He frowns. “You didn’t do anything, Red. This is not your fault. I know you don’t believe that right now, and it’s okay.”

  I shake my head. “It’s not. He’s dead. After everything we survived together, he’s gone and I can’t do anything to bring him back.” I’m spewing nonsense at this point, but I can’t stop it. The moment my words cut off, I’m crying again.

  Never in my twenty-six years on this earth—fae or otherwise—did I think I would be falling apart in front of Jackson Hawthorne on the side of the road, but here we are.

  Jackson sighs. “Come here.” Without hesitation, he unbuckles my seatbelt and pulls me across the center console and into his lap.

  I don’t try to stop him and I don’t pull away. In fact, I bury my face in his neck and grip the front of his shirt so tight in my hands, there will likely be permanent wrinkles in the light gray cotton. Especially considering this is the second time I’ve done this today.

  “Shh,” he coos, smoothing his hand down the back of my head, holding me to him. “Just breathe.”

  He has no idea that he’s keeping me together. His words, his grip on me, his very presence.

  It simultaneously brings me comfort and terrifies me, but my head is too full of anger and despair over Kyle to pay it much attention.

  In this moment, Jackson Hawthorne is my anchor.

  Chapter 20

  The time between pulling over and getting home is hazy.

  Jackson offers me a sedative when we get back to the house, and I accept it without hesitation. Everything after that is unclear at best. He has to help me upstairs due to the fog in my head making my legs unstable and my vision wonky.

  “I’ve got you,” he murmurs, scooping me up and holding me to his chest as he walks up the stairs. He pushes my bedroom door open and walks through the dark space, over to the bed where he lays me down gently.