Blood Trance

by R. D. Zimmerman

  “You always look great.”

  “Oh, stop.”

  I pushed her almost to the end of the dock. It was perfect timing, the two of us out there as the boat cruised in. Alfred made another turn, slowed the boat, began to bring it closer. Stepping over to help dock the craft, I let go of Maddy's chair, and as soon as I did, I saw my sister's hands go down and lock the brakes on each wheel.

  It was about then that I also noticed Carol Marie nudging Loretta, who in turn looked across the water at Maddy. Immediately, Loretta stood, came to the side of the boat, not sure whether or not to believe it. Then her mouth opened, shouted nothing but silence.

  Now seeing her more closely, I couldn't believe it, and keeping my voice low, I said, “My God, Maddy, she looks terrible.”

  “Oh, dear. How?”

  “Drawn.”

  More than that I couldn't say because the boat was pulling alongside the dock now and I didn't want to be overheard. But Loretta looked like hell. She'd been in jail since that night, of course, and her face was even whiter. Chalky. Her hair hung flat and straight, totally so, but it looked as if it had grayed considerably, if that was possible, in the few weeks since I'd last seen her. She'd lost weight, easily ten pounds, perhaps more, and I wondered if she'd been eating at all. That was the reason her face looked so drawn, and certainly why her dress hung more sacklike than ever.

  I went up and caught the rope that Alfred tossed, then tied up the bow of the boat. As I headed to the stern, I greeted the two sisters.

  “Hi, Carol Marie.” And then, “Hi, Loretta.”

  Loretta paid me no attention, and before I could tie up the rear of the boat, she was scrambling out. She eagerly jumped onto the dock, took a couple of quick steps, then froze, staring in disbelief.

  Maddy said, “Hello, Loretta.”

  Loretta didn't reply, didn't move.

  Maddy reached out, extending her hand. “I'm glad you're here. I understand things have been rough.”

  That beckoning was all it took. Loretta charged the last few steps, dropped to her knees, and placed her head in Maddy's lap. She took my sister's hand in two of hers, clutched it and kissed it.

  With her other hand, Maddy stroked Loretta's hair, said “Oh, you poor dear. You poor, poor dear. I'm so sorry.”

  It took nothing more. Loretta's back heaved upward. Next fell. She started shaking, even bucking, and at first there was silence, then there were a series of long, hideous sobs. Painful, mournful cries that seemed to come from her gut, and I watched as Loretta's fingers dug into Maddy's numb, unfeeling legs.

  “Don't worry,” cooed Maddy, still stroking her. “Everything will be all right. You'll see. You're here now.”

  Carol Marie, Alfred, and I looked on as Maddy received Loretta like a princess receiving a serf. But there it was, I thought, the relationship between therapist and patient physically acted out. This devotion was why Loretta had made what was for her those long, dangerous trips all the way into downtown Chicago. And this salvation was why she had made the arduous trip here to Madeline's island. Yes, my sister was full of wisdom and insights that she could bestow upon a client like a blessing.

  “Loretta,” asked my sister, now sounding very much like Dr. Phillips, ‘‘would you like to go up to my house now?”

  Loretta's head, still bowed in Maddy's lap, moved up and down, a nod that Maddy read by touch.

  “Good. Would you mind pushing me? I had an accident, you know, which was why I had to leave the office. I'm sorry I couldn't see you anymore. And I'm very sorry I never had the chance to say good-bye. That made me very sad. Do you understand?”

  I stood on the dock, the boat just to my side. The wind came up, swirled around. Of course Loretta understood. But would she accept it, Maddy's apology? Seconds ticked by. A seagull soared effortlessly past.

  Loretta lifted her head, uttered, “Yes.”

  “Good.” Maddy turned her head in my direction, commanded, “Alex, would you help Carol Marie with her bags? And Alfred, please put the boat away for the night. We'll see you all up at the house.” Maddy flicked off the brakes on the wheelchair. “Let's go, Loretta. Come on, get up now. You'll push me, won't you?”

  Eagerly, with even a hint of a smile, Loretta burst to her feet, ran behind the chair, then turned Maddy and started wheeling her down the dock. She didn't stop there, either. Not at the end of the pier where the black asphalt path began. Maddy, who so seldom allowed anyone to wheel her, let Loretta push her on up the slight hill, into the woods, and off toward the house. As they disappeared into the forest, I saw Maddy reach back with one hand, place it gently over Loretta's.

  Then from behind me, Carol Marie, who was still standing in the back of the large white boat, said, “I still don't think this is a good idea, playing around with Loretta like this. But it was the only way.” She lifted up a single nylon suitcase. “Here.”

  I stared at her, that prissy face that had appeared pleasant and even pretty in the shopping mall but now looked bland and almost ugly, and I didn't know what to say. I had countless questions for her, notwithstanding a good amount of ill will due to the acrimonious way she'd treated me down in Chicago.

  I took her luggage, lifted it from the boat, rose above all my thoughts, and said, “I beg your pardon?”

  “Your sister made me do this, bring Loretta up here.”

  “Oh.” I could have guessed as much. “Is that the only way she'd agree to post bail?”

  “Well, that, too.” As she climbed from the boat and onto the dock, Carol Marie went on, saying, “Dr. Phillips volunteered to post it because she said she had to see Loretta beforehand.”

  “Before what?”

  “Before we enter her plea. I don't know why. Everyone knows Loretta's insane. Of all people, Dr. Phillips should know that.”

  Which meant Maddy, of course, was to be a professional witness, testifying that Loretta was criminally insane. I suddenly understood and felt ill at heart. Could all of this and all of Loretta and her pain and tragedy be so easily and systematically—not to mention legally—dismissed?

  As I unfastened the ropes that tethered the boat to the dock, I asked, “Is that the angle your lawyers are taking?”

  “What other choice do we have? If we can prove that Loretta's crazy—which with your sister's help, shouldn't be hard—the sentence shouldn't be too harsh.”

  “But that's presuming Loretta killed Helen, which I don't think Maddy is quite ready to believe.” I hesitated, then added, “And I'm not sure I am, either.”

  “Yes, well…” Carol Marie looked down at the dock, shook her head, moaned, and said, “I just don't know what to believe anymore. This whole thing's so confusing, so terrible. You're right. I can't imagine her hurting anyone. But if she is innocent, why does she keep saying she's not? It just doesn't make any sense.”

  There was a roar as Alfred fired up the mighty engines of the boat and began pulling away. I picked up the lone piece of luggage; then the two of us started walking down the dock. When we'd nearly reached the shore, I heard a short bark and looked off to my right. With both dogs leashed, Solange was making her way down the path from the tall point.

  Yeah, right, I said to myself. Maddy had earlier said Solange was out for a stroll, but what was this, a daylong walk? Anything but, I thought, for Solange had just completed the outer path around the edge of the entire island. And with the dogs in tow, rather than a pleasant outing, it was obvious that Solange's duties for the day included patrolling for any would-be prowlers.

  Chapter 31

  I wanted to ask Maddy about Solange and her scouting, but there was no opportunity, for Loretta never left my sister's side. Maddy indulged her completely, too, first showing her her room—the one straight at the top of the stairs— then waiting while she washed, and finally making sure Loretta ate half a sandwich. I realized this was all part of the process of getting Loretta to relax, and it was well after eight before we were all led up to the third floor and into that room of tr
ances. And it was distinctly odd to be up in that vaulting space and not to be in the recliner. Not getting ready for another blastoff. I didn't like it. Maddy settled into her chair and readied herself for another trance, while Loretta took my space, the other black leather lounge chair, and did likewise. Which is why I felt so out of place. Carol Marie and I were seated back about ten feet in two hard wooden chairs, and I couldn't relax. Couldn't get comfortable. Carol Marie and I were the observers. The sideline spectators.

  As I studied Loretta, I could tell at once that Maddy had hypnotized her before and that it had been a positive experience. It was quite obvious, really. Loretta not only seemed eager, she seemed to know exactly what to do. She rolled her neck from side to side and got rid of the last kinks. She wiggled and straightened out her arms. Crossed her feet, then uncrossed them. Then crossed them again. Next smoothed out her large, billowy dress.

  “Okay, Loretta, I want you to get comfortable. You've had a very long day, but now the sun's setting, the long trip is over, and you can relax. Just stretch out there and take a couple of nice deep breaths,” began my sister. “Breathe in and out, and just imagine, Loretta, all the tension flowing from your body. You can let go of it now just like the sun is letting go of the day. You're here on my island and in my home, and everything is fine and safe. With each breath, with each gentle beat of your heart, you feel the tension slipping away.”

  I'd never done this before, witnessed a trance overtaking someone, yet I could sense that Loretta wanted this, wanted trance. Next to me Carol Marie shifted and fidgeted, obviously uncomfortable with it. I glanced at her, saw that she was focused on the phenomenon that was now licking at the edges of her older sister's psyche. Just wait, I thought.

  “I want you to look straight up, Loretta. In the beam above you is a small nail with a red head. Look at that nail above you and focus totally on it.”

  This was new, a different method from the eye-rolling one Maddy used with me. To each his own. I glanced upward and saw what I'd never noticed before. A small nail with a red head. It was hammered into a beam about eight feet directly over the recliner.

  “Focus on that, Loretta, and let your whole body relax. Your breathing is becoming slower and deeper as you feel this wonderful, warm sense of relaxation seeping into your body. You can feel it enter your feet and start upward. As you stare at that nail, this wonderful sense of relaxation is wrapping around your feet, your ankles, and now starting up your legs. It's a very warm, pleasant sensation, and now it's moving higher, up to your waist, into your chest, as if you were pulling a nice, secure blanket over you. Breathe in… breathe out, taking the rhythm and tone of my voice with you.

  “As you stare up at the nail, you feel your eyes grow heavy. Go ahead, let them close. Let that warm relaxation move up your neck, across your face, and over your eyes. It feels good to relax like this. Just let the tension go. Let it fly out of your body. You don't need it; you don't want it. Are your eyes closed now, Loretta?”

  From behind I could see Loretta's head move up and down. Maddy, of course, could not. Which might have been part of her plan, her way of coaxing the silent Loretta into speech.

  “Have they closed, Loretta? If you're nodding, I can't see you. Will you help me? I have no sight. If you've closed your eyes, it's all right to say yes.”

  Ten or fifteen seconds ticked by. Would Loretta bite?

  “Loretta,” said Maddy, “you don't have to worry. You're entering a state of hypnosis, but you don't have to say, and you won't say, anything that you don't want to. If you've closed your eyes, Loretta, it's perfectly safe and all right to say yes.”

  “Yes.”

  “Good. Breathe in… breathe out… Just let that warm, wonderful sense of relaxation seep across your shoulders, down your arms, into your hands.” Maddy's voice continued, soft and smooth, yet firm. “All the tension is slipping from your body and all the fear is flying away as you fall deep, deep, deep into hypnosis. Imagine that you're lying on some grass. The sun is shining warmly upon you. You don't have a care in the world. You feel drowsy, maybe. All your muscles are relaxed and loose and you feel extremely comfortable. You're a very good hypnotic subject, Loretta, and you know how to go deep into hypnosis.

  “Now I want you to imagine yourself standing up, Loretta. You get up from the grass and stand there. And before you are ten steps. At the bottom of the steps is a garden. When you reach the garden, you'll be in a deep trance. Take the first step. One. And breathe,” chanted Maddy in a slow, deep voice. “Let the air come in, slip out. Two. You're walking down the steps, and with each step you take, you breathe in deeply and let it out. Three. The garden below is beautiful and you can't wait to get down there. Four. It's almost like you're floating down the steps. Five. Drifting deeper and deeper into a more pleasant state. Six. This is your private garden, Loretta. It's beautiful and filled with flowers. Seven. You're going down the steps, and you feel more and more safe. More and more sure about yourself. More and more relaxed.” Maddy let a few long seconds slip by, then said with a measure of strong force, “Eight. You're only two steps from the bottom. You can smell the flowers now. Breathe in. Smell them? Good. Of course you do. Nine. And just one more step and you'll be in a wonderful place. A safe place. A haven. Your haven. And ten. You're down in your own private garden, Loretta. Before you are some flowers. What color are they?”

  “Red.”

  “And what kind are they?”

  “Roses.”

  “Good.”

  If I wasn't hypnotized, if I wasn't right down there in that garden alongside Loretta, then I very nearly was, for the air smelled sweeter and the world felt less tense, even more colorful. I was truly mesmerized by Maddy's chorus, felt as if a trance had come over me as I watched my sister bewitch Loretta. Everything was gone. All that mattered, all that I could see and understand, was these two women, Maddy and Loretta, who lay before me.

  “Loretta, I'd like to ask you some questions. Would that be okay?”

  Loretta started once, stopped, started again, her voice slow and mumbled, and finally said, “What… what kind of questions?”

  “I want to ask you questions that will help you and the people you love. Would that be all right?”

  Not one to be tricked, in a deep, low voice, Loretta repeated, “What kind of questions?”

  “Questions about the night Helen was murdered.”

  “You want to steal something from me, don't you?”

  “No, I don't want to take anything that you don't want to give me, Loretta.” Very softly, Maddy said, “I just want to ask you a few questions. Would that be all right?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Helen was killed and—”

  “Blood. Red blood like the roses in my garden.”

  “Yes, I understand she was stabbed. How did that make you feel, Loretta?”

  “I'm glad she's dead.”

  “Did you stab her?” asked Maddy, directly.

  “I hate Helen.”

  “Did you take the knife and stab Helen?”

  Loretta twisted. Mumbled. Struggled with the words, finally said, “I told the police I did it.”

  “I see.” Maddy twisted course, backed up a bit, and asked, “Before Helen was killed, you were in the woods. It was dark. It was night. Were you with anyone?”

  “Ray.”

  “And what were you doing?”

  “Fucking.” Loretta giggled. “Oh, but don't think badly of me. I only did it for Billy.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, sex calms people.”

  “And it made you calm?”

  “No, it made him calm.”

  “Go on, Loretta. It's okay to reveal this. It will help me help Ray. He needs help, doesn't he?”

  “His little girl was killed and Ray is very sad.”

  “I know. It's been terrible for him.” Voice soothing, calm, Maddy asked, “Was that the first time you had sex with Ray?”

  “No.”

&nb
sp; “When was the first time?”

  “Um. Um. A couple of years ago.”

  Maddy asked, “Did he attack you? Did he make you have sex with him that first time?”

  Loretta laughed. “No. I made him have sex with me. Maybe I raped him.”

  “How did you do that?”

  “He was in the woods across the street. He was staring at the house, hunting for Billy. He wanted to hurt Billy. So I went out and crossed the yard. I went right up to him and talked to him. He didn't want me there, but then I got close. And I touched him there, you know. His weenie. I kept touching it through his pants.” She giggled like a naughty girl. “And then it wasn't so weenie anymore. I unzipped him. And… and… then afterward he left.”

  “Did you have sex often after that?”

  “Ah, pretty often. I had to protect Billy.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Like I said, sex calms people. So whenever Ray felt angry about what happened to his little girl, he came to see me. And then Ray went away.”

  “And then Billy was safe?”

  “Exactly. Ray thought about me and sex and not about Billy.”

  Maddy said, “Did Helen know about this?”

  “She was very, very angry when she found out. She went after Ray. She chased him in the woods.”

  “With a knife?”

  “Yes. With a knife.”

  That, I thought, would have been when I'd first arrived. I'd heard the scream, gone running. I'd thought someone had been attacking Loretta, but that hadn't been the case. Ray and Loretta must have been in the woods, having sex. Helen must have spied them, and next she went after Ray, knife in hand. Which is why Helen hadn't reported it. She'd been the attacker.

  “Tell me, Loretta, you were in the woods with Ray the night Helen was murdered.”

  “We were doing it because Ray was very upset. He'd heard Billy was back in town, so I took him in my arms, told him not to worry, but…”