The One Who Waits for Me

by Lori Copeland

  “Beth!” The nun laughed again. “Such language. But I’m sorry. I really can’t shake you.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because.” Heat flushed the cheerful woman’s face. “I serve the Lord.”

  “You don’t think He would think I need a good shaking?”

  “I don’t presume to think for our Father and neither should you.” Another giggle escaped. “If it strengthens your faith, the captain is difficult…” Another snicker. “He’s very difficult to ignore, in which case we both need a good shaking. And if Reverend Mother heard us discussing the captain this way, she’d be happy to oblige.”

  “Please, Mary Margaret. Other than Joanie you’re my only friend.” Clamping her eyes shut tighter, she pleaded, “Shake some sense in—”

  She opened her eyes when she heard horses approaching and watched as a young Cherokee male rode up to the men and paused. His strong tanned body gleamed in the sunlight. Words were exchanged, and then moments later the youth rode off. Pierce and Preach set the saw aside and walked to their waiting horses. Beth frowned as they mounted up and rode after the young man.

  “Something must be wrong.” She set the hoe aside. “I’ll be back shortly.”

  “Your curiosity is going to get you into trouble,” Mary Margaret advised. “By the way, that’s a lovely bonnet. Did Sister Prue give it to you?”

  “I’m sure you’re right, and yes, Sister Prue made me this. She said she thought the sun was too hot.” If Sister Prue only knew how hot a cotton field could get.

  Running now, Beth crisscrossed the field and made her way toward camp. Sweat rolled from her temples. Loosening her bonnet, she let it slide down her back.

  When she arrived, she was met with an unexpected sight. A soldier dressed in tatters and wearing a Confederate gray-and-gold hat sat atop his horse, accepting a cup of water. Pierce and Preach had dismounted from their own horses and were deep in conversation with him.

  “You fought in Virginia?” Preach asked.

  The man nodded. “On my way home. Got a ways to go yet.”

  The captain’s voice washed over her. “Then you must have passed through Moss Hill?”

  Nodding, the man held out the cup once he’d drained it. An Indian woman refilled it. “Yes, sir, ’bout two days ago.” He drained the cup again.

  Stepping closer to the horse, Pierce asked, “Did you ride by the Tall Oak Plantation?”

  “Yep.” The man handed the cup back to the woman and motioned that he’d had his fill. “Couldn’t miss a spread that size.”

  Beth noted the way the captain’s face lit with expectancy. “Everything okay up that way?”

  The man shook his head sadly. “Nothing’s left.”

  Pierce took a step back. “There’s a lot of destruction there?”

  “I’d say so. Everything’s gone. Tall Oak’s been leveled, and everything within ten miles around is burnt to the ground.”

  Pierce’s features tightened, his eyes registering disbelief. “And the folks who owned Tall Oaks? The slaves and workers?”

  Shrugging, the man said, “What can I say? When I rode through there was nothing left but ashes. The whole area is a ghost town. A feller I passed on the road said the Union army burnt everything to the ground a couple of weeks before the war ended.”

  “The plantation owners…you’re certain the owners didn’t survive?”

  The man shook his head. “Gone. You have to hold your nose to ride through the area. It’s a pitiful sight.”

  Preach reached over and laid a steadying hand on Pierce’s shoulder. “Sorry, Captain.”

  Beth felt as though her heart were coming out of her chest. Pierce’s folks were gone. Pain as real as the agony she felt when Pa and Ma died filled her.

  “Are you certain? Tall Oak Plantation. Around fifty miles from here. Two thousand acres of cotton.”

  The stranger’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he wiped his mouth on his sleeve. He nodded. “Certain. Did you know the folks?”

  “They were my family.”

  “I’m shore sorry. This war’s been a thorn in every side.”

  No longer able to hold back, Beth walked up to the men and took Pierce’s hand. He squeezed hers reassuringly, and she bit back her tears. It must be awful for a man to not be able to cry when his heart was broken.

  “Did anyone mention my sister? She’s smart. It would take more than a few Northerners to take her down,” Pierce said.

  The stranger’s brow furrowed. “Truth be I did hear mention of your sister. They said she put up a whale of a fight. You’d have been proud of her.”

  Beth felt the captain sway. “Pierce—” She tightened her grip on his hand. “Can I get you some water?”

  Instead of responding he inhaled deeply and then faced the man. “Thanks. I appreciate your telling me.”

  “Sorry to have to bring you such bad news. Nothing but scorched land there now. If you were headin’ that way you might as well turn around. That’s a sight no man should witness.” He waved at the Indian woman who had brought his water. “Much obliged for the drink. I have more ground to cover before the day’s over.”

  Grim-faced, Pierce nodded. “God go with you.”

  Touching his forefinger to his hat brim, the stranger turned his horse and rode out of the camp.

  Letting go of Beth’s hand, Pierce turned and walked away. She hurried after him and fell into step beside him. He seemed to be heading for a place downstream. In the midst of God’s creation—soft green grass, low-flying birds, and the scent of honeysuckle filling the air—worry and pain went missing there.

  “Don’t you have something better to do?”

  Taken aback by his curt question, she momentarily lagged behind. She knew he would need privacy. Men didn’t openly grieve if they could prevent it. Yet she longed to comfort him.

  Still trailing behind him, she tried to match his long strides. Angry strides. And why wouldn’t he be angry? He’d fought for the Union and risked his life to preserve the North’s beliefs, only to find out that Union soldiers had slaughtered his family. The thought would make anyone mad.

  They approached a peaceful clearing, and Pierce paused. She caught up, standing still as a mouse, not sure what to say to him.

  “Pierce,” she said softly after a few moments. She wanted to comfort him, but she didn’t know how to grieve herself. She’d loved Ma and Pa and their death had hurt, but she was able to go on, and that was when she didn’t even believe there might be a God to console—not then. Maybe not even now, but the past few days she’d run into a whole lot of people who put stock in the claim of a higher source. She’d plied Sister Mary Margaret with questions and the nun hadn’t been put off by her doubts. Rather, she seemed to welcome the conversations, offering kindness right alongside her wisdom. It came easier now to believe there could be a God, a God who actually cared about people. About her. She might not have paradise here on earth, but according to Sister Mary Margaret, life was a short journey on the way to an eternal place, where there would be no more sorrow, death, or suffering.

  She clung to the thought as she wrapped her hands around the captain’s arm. “If you want to cry, I’ll understand.”

  A muscle worked in his jaw. “I don’t want to cry. I want to shoot someone.”

  Beth stepped back, her hands dropping away from him.

  “I said I want to shoot someone.” He turned to face her. “And that makes me real mad, Beth.”

  “Why? I thought you wanted peace. You said you’re weary of war—”

  “That’s what I want,” he interrupted. “Deep down that’s what I want, but right now…” His face turned red, and he sat down roughly and raked his hands through his hair.

  Grief was making him talk crazy. “I understand,” she soothed. “When a person’s had all they can take, they want to reach out and hurt someone. I know that feelin’ well.”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “I do.” She paused and their eyes locked.
“I understand hatred.”

  “Beth.”

  “Please.” She took a hesitant step toward him. “At first I was afraid of you—even despised you—but you have proven to be a…a decent man.”

  It surprised her to realize that sometime in these past hectic days his friendship, and his feelings, had become important to her.

  For the first time in her life she liked a man. A man who had lost everything important to him.

  Reaching out, he drew her down to him and held her tightly. She rested against the solid wall of muscle, her head tucked under his chin, grieving with him. After a long while, she blinked. “Pierce.”

  “What.”

  “What…are we doing?”

  “We’re thinking. In silence.”

  “But—”

  His hold tightened. “Complete silence.”

  So they thought. In silence. For an extra long time it seemed. Beth wound her arms around him, hugging him and praying, God, help him to be able to endure this loss.

  Eventually, his hold loosened and he held her away from his chest, facing her. “Beth.”

  “Yes?” She gazed into his eyes, eyes she could drown in if he permitted.

  “Thank you for your compassion.”

  Nodding, she said softly, “I’m so sorry about your family.”

  “So am I, but not for the same reasons.”

  Her head tilted questioningly.

  “I don’t have a sister, Beth.”

  Her features crumpled. “Oh, Pierce. I know how you feel. If I lost Joanie—”

  “No.” He put a finger under her chin and made her look at him. “I don’t have a sister. I never did. That man was lying.”

  A soft gasp escaped her. “Lying!”

  “Lying. Someone must have paid him to ride in here and feed me a wild story. Walt’s or Bear’s work, no doubt.”

  “How could they be so low?” She knew the answer before the words came out of her mouth. Neither man was known for integrity.

  “They want us to ride away and leave you and Joanie here.”

  Beth was still trying to digest the news that the man had lied. He’d been so convincing. “That’s…awful.” Her temper surfaced as realization fell. “That’s deplorable! And so like Uncle Walt.”

  She was going to get up and march away when he caught her arm. “Hold on. Where do you think you’re going?”

  “To find Uncle Walt and Bear and put a stop to this right now!”

  The steel band clamped tighter. “No, you’re not.”

  “I am! He can’t do this to good people. I…I won’t permit it.”

  “What are you going to do? Surrender to him?”

  The notion stopped her cold.

  “Think about it, Beth. If you play into his hands, you’ll be giving away everything you’ve worked for—your self-respect and your sister’s health. Not to mention the deed to the plantation.” His eyes met hers. “Are you willing to do that?”

  “No. I can’t surrender.” They had come too far and risked too much. Joanie was getting better every day. Beth didn’t know if prayer was doing the job or if it was simply being out of a home that brought only pain and misery.

  He looked to be deep in thought. She felt terrible. She had brought all this on him.

  “Pierce, what else can I do? I can’t let Walt destroy innocent lives because of me. I have no other choice but to go with him. He’ll let Joanie stay here if I agree to tell him where the deed is hidden. I don’t want the plantation. It holds nothing but memories of misery and hurt for Joanie and me. I have my own plot of land if I can ever get there.”

  Pierce tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and just looked at her thoughtfully.

  “I’ll do what you want if you’ll help me keep Joanie out of Walt’s hands.”

  “What about you?”

  Resigned, she sighed. “I guess I’ve always known that I’d pick Walt’s cotton for the rest of my life.”

  “What about Bear?”

  “Walt will make me marry him.”

  Shaking his head, he put his hat back on his head and stood. He held out his hand to help her up. “Not if I have anything to say about it.”

  As she took his hand and came to her feet, hope surged—and then just as quickly deflated. “That’s the problem. You don’t have anything to say about it.”

  Thirty-One

  Late the next morning, Beth packed a lunch for four and went in search of Joanie. She found her in the nursing tent with Trella, whom she embraced warmly. “I’ve seen so little of you since we arrived!” Beth exclaimed.

  “I know, and I’m sorry.” Trella glanced at her sleeping daughter, who was lying on a soft pallet near the fire. “Esther takes so much time.”

  Beth stepped over to admire the child. She’d lost her earlier redness, and now her skin was a lovely, healthy-looking hue. “She looks mighty satisfied.”

  “She is well fed.” Trella smiled at the Indian woman who sat alongside her. “Awinita is like a second mother.”

  Joanie sat next to the fire, peeling potatoes. “What are you doing here? I thought you were working in Sister Mary Margaret’s garden.”

  “I was earlier, but I thought you might like to have lunch together.”

  Shaking her head, Joanie said, “Thank you, but I’ll stay and visit with Awinita. Did you know her name means ‘fawn’?”

  Beth smiled. “I didn’t. Are you sure you wouldn’t like to go? I packed your favorites. Cold fried squirrel and fresh berries.”

  Her sister laid a potato in a bowl. “I’m sure.”

  Shrugging, Beth said, “All right. I’ll tell Gray Eagle you sent greetings.”

  Joanie scrambled to her feet. “Gray Eagle?”

  Wearing her most innocent look, Beth said, “Why, yes. I’m taking lunch to Gray Eagle and Pierce.”

  “I’ll go.”

  Where did my resolve to keep the two apart go? Beth wondered. She not only was encouraging the attraction, she was actually feeding it. Yet she knew why her reservations about Gray Eagle failed to hold. She’d seen the gentle care he had for Joanie. Always kind, comforting. Every day he and Joanie went for a walk, and every day her health improved. She still coughed a little, but not the wracking spasms that seemed as though they would tear her body apart. His company did Joanie a world of good, and Beth couldn’t begrudge her sister’s happiness.

  Together they walked downstream to where Pierce and Gray Eagle were working. Rebuilding the village structures from the fire four days ago was in full swing in the bright weather. When Pierce glanced up and spotted the two sisters, he grinned.

  Waving, Beth motioned to the loaded basket.

  The men approached, their bodies glistening with sweat. Slipping on his shirt, Pierce eyed the packed basket hungrily. “What have we here?”

  Gray Eagle sought Joanie’s eyes. “Hello, Joanie Jornigan.”

  “Good afternoon, Gray Eagle.” Both had shy smiles for the other.

  Beth spread a blanket on the ground in the shade, and then she set out lunch, painfully conscious of Pierce’s presence and how much she enjoyed his company. Over the last few days, it was beginning to make sense to her why some women felt that they needed a man in their lives. If all men were like Pierce and Gray Eagle, the world wouldn’t be so bad. But fanciful thoughts about the captain and scout were useless. Even if Gray Eagle could overlook Joanie’s illness, and Pierce was a different kind of a man than she’d ever encountered in her life, the handsome diversions would eventually be on their away.

  Pierce blessed the food and they begin to eat. Beth’s mind strayed to her earlier prayers. Evidently God didn’t intend to release her or Joanie from Walt. Perhaps she’d been right all along about Him and her doubts about His existence were justified. Yet she hoped He had heard her pleas. What if she’d really listened when Joanie read the Bible to her aloud in the secrecy of their loft on moonlit nights? Clearing her throat, she asked, “May I ask a question?”

  Pierce reached for a
piece of flat bread. “Shoot.”

  “It’s about prayer.”

  Smiling, Pierce folded the bread in half and took a bite. Then he asked, “Are you still worrying about the proper way to pray?”

  Joanie glanced up. “You are?” She broke into a wide grin. “You’re actually thinking about prayer?”

  “Thinking of how to pray properly,” Beth clarified, worried that Joanie would get her hopes up that she might become someone half as knowledgeable as her sister.

  Joanie’s face softened. “I’ve prayed so long for this moment, Beth.”

  “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. And I’m considering the matter.”

  Nodding, Joanie’s face sobered and she said softly, “You feel the weight as well?”

  Joanie felt guilty too? Beth slowly nodded. “Something awful. It was wrong of us, Joanie. We shouldn’t have done it.”

  Gray Eagle rolled to his side and dropped a strawberry in his mouth. His expression said he had no idea what they were talking about, but Beth didn’t care. She needed to get this out.

  “I never dreamt that burning the shanty would also set the cotton fields on fire. That mean act has made me feel…so bad and shameful,” Joanie admitted. “We must have put many friends out of work.”

  Choking on his food, Gray Eagle sat up. When it appeared that he couldn’t dislodge the berry from his throat, Beth reached over and whacked his back. His coughing eased.

  “Are you okay?” Joanie asked.

  “Fine.” He rubbed moisture from his eyes. “What did you say?”

  “Are you okay?”

  “Before that.”

  Joanie’s features turned curious. Beth supplied the answer. “You said we most likely put many friends out of work.”

  Joanie’s hand came to her mouth. “I did?”

  Pierce reached for another slice of bread. “Don’t worry about it, Joanie. Beth told me about the intent to only burn the shanty. The fields were just an unfortunate result of that.”

  “Beth!” Joanie exclaimed.

  Beth’s cheeks flushed with heat. “I did. I’m sorry.” She shot the captain a censuring look. Of course he would tell on her.