Scorn of Secrets

by B Truly

  * * *

  The month of June flies by. Tanya finally lands a job in the mall. Mama didn’t give her much of a choice. She harassed Tanya about it every time I looked up. When Tanya receives her first check, Mama has her hand out. She gives Tanya a hundred dollars to play with. Tanya still pouts about it, even though she got a better deal than me. I know better than to accuse Mama of favoritism. Bringing that up will strike a nerve with her and I know she already has a lot on her plate.

  On the 4th of July, we end up spending the weekend at my gram’s—Gigi’s—house because Mama is out of town with Regan. Dari comes over, too. All in all, it’s a nice holiday, we eat good. My chest tightens when the fireworks start. We used to always pop them with my dad.

  The second weekend of July after Mama gets home, I get the surprise of the century. Mama wants to speak with us. Another sit-down only means more bad news.

  “Our house is being foreclosed on,” Mama starts.

  My forehead wrinkles. I’ve heard the word before. “What does that mean?”

  “In three months or less, we won’t have a place to stay.”

  I cover my mouth with my hand. What else will go wrong?

  “What about the money you’ve taken from our checks?” Tanya wants to know.

  “I don’t think you understand the debt your father put us in. The mortgage was already three months behind when he died.”

  “What about filing bankruptcy?” I have no idea how that works. I’ve just heard of people doing it in desperate times of need.

  Mama rakes a hand through her long hair. “Filing for bankruptcy is too much of a hassle and it’s not guaranteed to fix the problem.”

  Tanya bites her cuticles. “Where will we live?”

  “Regan is going to fix everything. I’m so thankful for him.”

  “Is he going to pay off our debt?” I guess.

  “Even better,” Mama clasps her hands together in delight. “He’s offered for us to move in with him. Isn’t that wonderful?”

  My brain registers what she is saying, becoming confused. “Doesn’t he live in Texas?”

  “Yes, but he has a huge house in Houston—plenty of room.”

  “Can’t we move in with Gigi? Surely that’s better than moving us to another state?” I can’t help saying.

  Mama narrows her eyes. “Moving with Regan is the best solution.”

  “But next year is my senior year,” Tanya chimes in. “Surely, you won’t make me go to a new school after attending Winsten for three years. I want to graduate with my friends.”

  “It won’t be as bad as you think, honey. With your personality, you’ll make new friends in no time.”

  Tanya’s lips tremble. I’m still attempting to process what she’s explaining. She’s only known this man for how long, two months? “You want to move in with your boyfriend this soon? How do you know he’s not a mass murderer?”

  Mama shoots daggers at me. “Regan is a good man. He has answered our prayers. We should be grateful he’s willing to take us in.”

  I want to burst into tears. My home is here in Baton Rouge. “There’s no way for us to stay in Louisiana? I can speak to my boss about getting more hours.”

  “The decision is final. We’ll be moving in two weeks.”

  The room begins to spin. My father dying must be too much for her. She’s not thinking clearly, making rash decisions.

  “Mama, it isn’t fair that I have to go to another school my senior year,” Tanya pouts.

  “Tanya, life isn’t fair. We just have to play the card we’re dealt,” Mama says, point blank. “There are advantages to moving to Houston. You’ll be in the lap of luxury without a care in the world. Regan’s house is a dream, and Houston is a bustling city. Plenty going on to make new acquaintances.”

  Tanya blows out her breath, shifting her weight.

  “Have you been to his house?” I wonder.

  “I visited last weekend to meet his sons. I’m certain once you get to know them, they’ll be like the brothers you never had.”

  Oh, I doubt that.

  “Do you love this man?” Tanya wonders.

  Mama swallows hard. “I care deeply for him. Offering his home to us tells me just how much Regan cares about me also.”

  “What if we move there and you guys break up? Won’t we be worse off than we started?” I ask.

  Mama evades the question. “This is the best choice. They haven’t found out who shot your father. With our house getting robbed, no one can reassure me that we’re safe here. Moving to Houston will keep us out of harm’s way.”

  Mama has a point. I just don’t agree that moving to another state with a man she hardly knows is the answer. She’s not leaving room for discussion. It looks like we’re moving to Houston whether we want to or not.

  * * *

  Mama tries to butter us up over the next week. She lets us choose new bedroom sets online. With what she’s told us about the debt she’s in, she can’t afford to pay for this stuff. So, it must be compliments of her new flame.

  The furniture will be delivered to his house, waiting for us. I haven’t had a new bedroom suite since I was a child. It’s nice getting something new and lavish. I just wish it was under better circumstances.

  We don’t have much furniture to pack. Most of it was destroyed or stolen when we were robbed. What little we have will be put in a U-Haul and delivered to us. I wonder what kind of man Regan is to be willing to move his new girlfriend into his home with two teenage daughters. Does he have a hidden agenda, or does he really care about my mom that much? I suspect that Mama met him before dad died. She originally started going out a couple of weeks beforehand. Those are my suspicions. Even if they did meet in March, they’ve only known each other for approximately four months.

  I know Gigi will take us in. Is Mama’s pride getting in the way of asking for her help? The conversation I overheard between Gigi and Mama before this all happened comes to mind. The fact she had already taken money from Gigi she couldn’t pay back might be the reason she can’t ask for more now.

  I resent my mom for making such a life-changing decision without our consent or even a vote. At the same time, I understand if she’s in that much debt, she doesn’t have many options.

  6

  Departure

  Dariel comes over to visit. She helps me pack the remainder of my room. The beige walls are bare, and my closet is empty. Our plane leaves in three days. Moving to Texas is like a time bomb ticking. The explosion will be the catastrophic change of my life.

  Dari blows out her breath. “I still can’t believe you’re moving to Houston.”

  “That makes two of us.”

  “This sucks. What will I do without you?”

  “We can text and call each other every day.”

  “Yeah, but it won’t be the same. You’re holding up fairly well, considering. This is a drastic change.”

  “Looks can be deceiving. I wish I could crawl under the bed and never come out.”

  “How weird do you think it will be moving in with his two teenage sons?”

  “Very. I’ve thought about asking Gigi to live with her.”

  “You should ask her.”

  “I don’t want to be a burden. I’ll just have to tough it out in Houston.”

  “I don’t understand your mom. Your dad recently died, and she’s moved on so quickly.”

  “I’ve been trying to figure it out myself, and I’ve come up blank.” I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. Her mind is made up.”

  “How long has your mom known this guy—like three days?”

  I snort. “You might as well say that.”

  “It’s kinda scandalous for her to have another man at record speed after being married for so long.”

  “It’s like Mama thinks she’s a damsel in distress and he’s her knight in shining armor. He’s swept her off her feet.”

  Dari raises her eyebrows. “He’s loaded?”

  “That’s what I’m getti
ng from what she’s told us. Mama bought Tanya and me new bedroom suites from an expensive store online. She flat out told us she was broke, so there’s no way she could’ve paid for it.”

  “You think she’s using him for his money?”

  “Maybe … I mean, he’s nice looking and they seem into each other. It’s just too soon to be shacking up.”

  “So, basically, he’s loaded and easy on the eyes. Sorry to say this, but your mom seems like the damsel in distress type.”

  “I wish there were another way. I’m really going to miss you, Dari.”

  “I’m gonna miss my best friend, too.”

  Dari’s right. She’s more than my cousin, we’re besties.

  Her cell phone pings, and she reads the text. “My mom says she’s on her way.”

  Our moms have always had a strained relationship. Neither of us understands the reason. The sisters avoid each other at all costs—only playing nice if they happen to see each other at family events.

  Dari’s mom is two years older. You would think only being two years apart, they would be close—not the case. Their relationship is more distant than Tanya’s and mine. So, it’s odd for Dari’s mom to be standing on the doorstep. Aunt Cass rarely comes inside to pick her up. She usually texts Dari or blows the horn for her to come out. Dari arches her eyebrow as I let her mom in.

  “Hi, Madison.”

  “Hey, Aunt Cass.”

  “I’m ready, Ma,” Dari tells her, standing awkwardly in the entryway.

  “We’ll leave in a minute. Where’s your mom, Madison?”

  Mama steps into view from the kitchen, crossing her arms. “What can I do for you, Cassandra?”

  “I heard you’re moving to Houston,” Aunt Cass says.

  Mama scrunches her nose. “It shouldn’t surprise me the news traveled fast. Did Corine tell you?”

  Corine is the oldest of the three sisters. Neither sister has any ill-will toward their older sister. Corine stays neutral—normally playing the mediator.

  “Are you really going to move to Houston with Regan when your husband just died in April?”

  Mama flinches like Aunt Cass slaps her. “How does that affect you? I’m doing what’s best for my family.”

  “Is moving them there what’s best? I think we both know what this is about.”

  My eyes dart over to Dari’s. She shrugs, clueless also.

  “It’s the safest avenue for us and our mother agrees with me.” Mama throws her long, black hair behind her shoulders. “Did you forget my husband was shot in cold blood and they haven’t found out who killed him?”

  Now it is my turn to cringe at the reminder of how my dad died.

  “What does that have to do with you moving?” Cassandra argues.

  Aunt Cass must not be aware of the details about our house getting foreclosed on. It’s one reason Mama said we had to move.

  “I don’t think the shooting is a coincidence. My hunch is the people who shot him are the ones who robbed us a couple of weeks before he died,” Mama explains.

  This is the first time I’ve heard her mention the details about Dad’s dilemma. From how she’s acted, you’d swear he died of natural causes. I’m not sure if she’s saying this to get it off her chest, or to justify why we’re moving. My gut says the latter. She’s explaining to keep the peace, which is weird in itself. She’s never cared to make amends with Cassandra before.

  Aunt Cass’ eyes grow large. She had to have known our house was vandalized, because Dari asked me if I was okay before I’d even mentioned it. As Mama requested, I didn’t share with Dari, who I thought had been responsible. Dari assumed it was a random burglary. From the look on her mom’s face, she isn’t aware of the suspicions about the robbery, either. Dari glances at me with her brow knitting.

  Mama places her hands on her hips. “So, yes, moving away from here will be safer for my family.”

  Aunt Cass’ mouth forms into a tight line. “I guess you’ve got it all figured out.”

  Mama smirks at her. “And then some.”

  “I hope you don’t think this proves you’ve won. I got over that mess a long time ago.”

  “This was never a game.” Mama shrugs. “If it were, then I won a long time ago.”

  “If that’s what you think, then you’re more delusional than I thought.” Aunt Cass shakes her head. “I won’t let you try to bait me. Let’s go, Dari.” She spins on her heels and is out the door in seconds flat.

  “I’ll call you later, Madie,” Dari tells me. She gives a “wth” look before she leaves.

  I’d love to know the Morse code the sisters were discussing. The entire encounter was strange to say the least. I’m the first in line to not be happy about going to Texas. I believe Aunt Cass loves Tanya and me because we’re her nieces, but I seriously doubt she’ll lose any sleep over Mama’s departure. Us going to Houston to live with Regan had upset her enough to come inside to discuss it when she usually avoids my mom like the plague. There is definitely a hidden meaning behind their comments about playing games and winning. It must be a direct link behind what started their animosity in the first place.

  * * *

  The trip to the airport terminal is rimmed in silence. Gigi is driving us. She’s been supportive, saying encouraging words like, “it will all work out” and “everything happens for a reason.” Deep down, I don’t think Gigi is thrilled about us leaving. But she probably feels it’s not a bad idea for us to get out of town, worried about the robbery and how my father was murdered.

  The airport is busy, and it takes a while to check in. Gigi waits with us until they announce its time for us to board our plane. Gigi hugs Tanya first, then she embraces Mama, who pats her back awkwardly. Charlotte has never been the touchy type—Regan being the exception these days. She is all over him whenever they’re together.

  Gigi hugs me next. “Take care of yourself, Madison.”

  “I’m going miss you, Gigi.”

  “I’ll miss you, too, dear. Just be yourself and everything will be fine.” Her lips curve upward, not reaching her eyes. “It won’t be as bad as you think. Just remember life is what you make of it.”

  Gigi has always taught me to roll with the punches. “I’ll try to make the best of it.”

  “That’s the spirit. Call me when you get settled.”

  I wave good-bye, then head to the check-in line to board.

  Our seats are all together. Mama and Tanya are out like a light not long after we take off. My mind is too busy to sleep. I ponder on my new life. A new home, father figure and, basically, stepbrothers. Ugh! Everything is so foreign and causes my stomach to roil. Staring out the window, I study the white puffs of vapor. Clouds can form countless shapes. There are so many possibilities. I imagine them to be what my life could be if my father hadn’t died and I got to stay in Baton Rouge. The thoughts keep my mind off what’s to come, imagining my life turning out with a happy ending.

  My daydream is a fantasy and reality sets in when the plane starts to land.

  * * *

  Regan is waiting for us at the airport. Mama’s honey-brown irises light up when she spots him, grinning like a schoolgirl. She walks right up to him, planting one on his mouth. My jaw drops. It’s not a timid kiss, either. Mama must have missed him terribly—she’s not holding back. Regan returns her kiss for a moment. He must remember where he’s at because he pulls back with a goofy grin.

  “Hello, ladies. I’m glad you made it,” he addresses Tanya and me. His lips curl upward, appearing genuine.

  “Girls, you remember, Regan,” Mama coos.

  He helps retrieve our luggage, then we head to his SUV. Houston has two airports. We arrived at the bigger one, Continental. Regan makes small talk on the forty-five-minute drive to his house. He asks us how our flight was and what we think of Houston so far.

  My eyes reach the heavens. I wouldn’t really know. I’ve been here less than an hour. The city is big. That much I can tell. There are buildings everywhere I look
. I don’t know how people find their way around. There’s multiple freeways and beltways. I’m confused already.

  Regan gets off Beltway 8, going down a bustling street called Westheimer. This street is more like a highway, with at least four lanes on each side. Restaurants and stores fill every space. The parking lots are packed, too. Houstonians love to shop and get their grub on. Reminds me of New Orleans.

  This part of town appears ritzy, resembling a Californian suburb. The buildings are made of fine brick and stucco. The landscaping is lovely. Trees and lush vegetation surround the area. You can tell it’s well cared for.

  Regan turns off to a more secluded street. The trees are larger here, creating a sense of privacy. As we drive, I see a massive, peach-toned brick wall. It soars so high you can’t see over it. This must be what Fort Knox looks like. Nothing is climbing over that wall. I do notice the tops of homes behind it. This is a gated community.

  We travel down the street along the Fort Knox wall for a while. The subdivision is huge. Regan makes another turn, arriving upon a large iron-rod gate in front of the gigantic wall. Regan punches a code into the gate box and the door swings open. As we drive in, I read the sign with the name of my new home—Royal Oaks.

  7

  Houston, TX

  This must be an episode of MTV Cribs is the thought that runs through my mind when I enter his enormous two-story home. The moving van will arrive soon with the rest of our stuff, which isn’t much after getting vandalized.

  This is by far the largest house I’ve ever been in. The home is built with a combination of brick and stucco. The roof is a gorgeous Spanish style tile. The double stained-glass entry doors are at least eight feet tall. Everything looks custom, from dark hardwood and immaculate tile floors, to a spiral, iron stair railing and vaulted ceilings. The grand crystal chandelier that hangs in the entrance makes me feel like I’ve stepped into a fancy ball. My mouth gapes in awe, taking it all in. Tanya’s eyes are as big as saucers, and she’s wearing a huge grin on her face.