Barbara's Redemption

by Diane Saxon

  Relief flooded her muscles to make them weak as an aged black Labrador with white whiskers ambled to the side of her chair and leaned his huge head on her thigh. He stared up at her with a melting gaze designed to appeal to the hardest of hearts. As far as the dog was concerned, hers was putty.

  Dominic gave her arm a light squeeze. “Don’t, whatever you do, feed my dog.”

  “Oh he’s gorgeous.” She lowered her head to come into eye contact with Brynn.

  “Don’t feed him.”

  “Hello, handsome.”

  “Barbara, don’t do it.”

  “He’s so beautiful.” She couldn’t help the croon in her voice.

  “Don’t feed…”

  She tugged a morsel of bacon from between the slices of bread and offered it to the irresistible hound. He rolled his eyes with pleasure as he sucked the meat from between her fingers with a soft mouth, his tongue diligently cleaning every trace of bacon.

  “What a sweetheart.”

  “He’s getting fat.”

  “He’s old. He’s allowed a little weight at his age.”

  “But not fat. It’s not good for him to be overweight.”

  “It was just a little piece.” She raised her head to appeal to Dominic’s better nature. “How come you haven’t brought him before?” She picked up her sandwich and took another bite. The dog slumped his head back on her leg in defeat.

  Dominic sighed and turned his attention back to his own food. “He would have been on his own too long.” He shrugged and took a drink. “My housekeeper was going out. He’s pretty well behaved except for being a scrounger, so I bring him with me on occasion.”

  She scratched the silky black fur on Brynn’s head and smiled as he gave a gusty sigh. “Well he’s beautiful.”

  “Thank you.”

  And so are you. The words very nearly popped from her mouth, but she concentrated on chewing. The professor was beautiful. With his glasses on top of his head, she had a clear view of his eyes, but they skittered away as he reached for the ketchup again and presented her with a side view.

  He flexed his clean-shaven jaw as he chewed, and Barbara’s heart did a slow roll over in her chest. Beautiful didn’t quite cover it. There was nothing about the man that was unattractive. Not his face, not his body, not his subtle lemon scent. He stopped her breath.

  He glanced back up and gave a quick downward twitch of his brows. “Is everything okay?”

  “Yeah. Sure.” She pushed the rest of the sandwich into her mouth and spoke around it. “What are we going to do today?” Please let him say they were about to have wild sex, tearing up the sheets in her bedroom or his.

  “We’ll have another crack at the Dreampsych Transcender, if you think you can take it seriously.”

  Disappointment trickled through her veins. Not wild sex. Shame.

  »»•««

  The steady thrum of an aircraft engine filled her ears, sending an almost comforting vibration through her warm, relaxed body. She allowed the smile to spread across her face, her eyes closed to better enjoy the sensation of being a small pot of melted wax with nothing to worry about, no cares, no stress. The familiar ease of flying transported her. Just a soothing warmth wrapping her in a security blanket.

  Of course, Dominic wasn’t going to allow the situation to continue, but for the moment, she would take advantage and enjoy the mindless floating sensation.

  A jarring smack in the base of her back had her lurching forward. It was just one more of Dominic’s scenarios designed to make her crazy. He’d lulled her into the dream, but deep down she knew he’d change the dynamics. He always did.

  Barbara let out a sigh and opened her eyes, casting her gaze around the confines of the cabin. Jeez, he hadn’t even the decency to make it a US Air Force plane. No, it had to be commercial.

  The quick slam to her kidneys almost unseated her. Whatever evil machinations he had in store for her, she was going to have to rouse herself and do a little investigation. She shuffled in her aisle seat to face the middle one, and then turned to peer through the gap between them. Close up to the squinty eyed stare of a prepubescent child, she studied his rounded cheeks splotched with large tan freckles, which only served to make his face look dirty. He met her puzzled gaze with an angry one of his own. His button nose wrinkled for a split second before he pursed his mouth and poked out a bright purple tongue. Too many colorings in the gum his mother had undoubtedly supplied him with was making the kid a jittery mess.

  She turned her back on him. She was in control. It was her dream, and she could ignore him.

  He smacked the back of her chair again and gave her head another jolt.

  She ground her teeth. Dominic couldn’t mean for her to shoot the kid, no matter how flippant she’d been in her previous attempts. She didn’t shoot kids, not even in dream scenes. Her stomach gave an uneasy lurch, bubbling acid into the back of her throat. She didn’t want to do this one. This wasn’t something she was prepared for. She didn’t harm kids. It wasn’t as though she could shoot someone to persuade Dominic to let her out of the dream. Not this time. There was no one to shoot except the kid.

  She breathed through her nose in an attempt to slow her panicked breath. He would know. He’d have picked it up on the monitor, the small blip she’d foolishly allowed to slip through. The brief drop of her tight composure. A composure she already had a grip on again.

  It was only a dream scene; she could handle it. Unless of course she turned around and the brat held an Uzi SMG in his hands. Then she was stuffed.

  Slow and cautious, she peered over her shoulder. The child had his face pressed between the seats, his mean little mouth squished up into an angry pout, and his hatred filled eyes glared at her. If ever she’d believed in possession by the devil, this child was the personification of it.

  Great, she was left with no other choice but to shoot the kid to get out of the dream.

  She crossed her arms over her chest to hug herself in and slumped back in her seat. If she didn’t look at him, simply ignored him, perhaps Dominic would have to wind the program on to something more threatening. Like a giant lizard boarding the plane. She could shoot a giant lizard.

  A sharp poke of a hard little finger in her shoulder made her turn around again.

  “Hey.” Less of a greeting than a warning, Barbara raised her eyebrows at the boy. Where the hell were his parents? What did they think they were doing allowing him to harass fare paying passengers? Wasn’t he old enough to know better? He had to be eleven or twelve. Old enough to have some control, some discipline…

  She glanced over the top of his head and caught sight of a woman she presumed was his mother. In a full passionate clinch with a man in the window seat, she had her back half turned to her son, her hand on the crotch of the man while she sucked the face off him.

  No surprise the child was angry.

  Barbara curled her lip, revulsion curdling her stomach as her gaze slid over the pair. The man had one hand under the hem of the woman’s rucked up skirt, and the other kneaded her breast in full view of anyone who cared to look. Barbara didn’t care to look and obviously neither did the child.

  “Hey.” She said again, this time her tone a little gentler. “What’s up?”

  His narrowed gaze slid sideways, and then back to meet hers. “Nothin’.”

  “You got nothing to do?”

  “No.”

  “Don’t you want to watch a video?” All around, people had their gazes glued to the personal screens, so there must be something good.

  “I’ve seen all the kid’s programs. They’re all crap. Mom said anything R-rated was inappropriate.”

  Barbara glanced at the pair virtually having sex on the seats beside him and wondered at a mother who could set such double standards. “I don’t think she’d notice.”

  “She put a parental lock on when we took off.”

  “Shit.”

  “Yeah.”

  The glitter of anger in his eyes dissi
pated, and as she looked at him, his face relaxed, losing its pinched quality. He probably wasn’t such a bad kid, provided Dominic hadn’t programmed him to have a damned Uzi behind the seat.

  “How about you do some art? You look like the artistic type.”

  A brief flicker of interest passed over his features, only to die before it really lit. “I have nothing to draw on.”

  What parent didn’t bring entertainment for their kid on a long flight? She glanced at the mother once more. The type who had no aversion to having sex in front of her son.

  Still, it was only a dream. She knew she could control certain parts, and she was going to have some control here. “I have paper and pencils. Colored pencils.”

  She turned away, grabbed her rucksack off the floor, and delved into it. The solid touch of cold metal against her fingers made her smile. Yeah, she’d have a SIG if it was her dream. Her fingers felt for the promised paper and pens, and she placed the rucksack on her lap while she handed them to the boy.

  “I’m sorry, sir, could I ask you to take your seat?”

  Barbara turned at the unfamiliar female voice. A man stood in the aisle with his back to her, blocking her view of anyone else, but she assumed it was a flight attendant who addressed him. His wide shoulders jerked, and he mumbled something under his breath.

  “Pardon me, I didn’t quite…”

  “I said, get out of my face, you fucking bitch.”

  Barbara’s fingers closed over her SIG while she dropped the rucksack onto the floor, unclipped her seat belt, and slipped out of the seat to stand behind the man in the aisle, armed hand held with deceptive casualness behind her back.

  “Excuse me, sir? May I speak with the attendant?”

  He whipped around so fast, she almost shot him straight away. She knew the hitch in her heart would have registered, but only a small one. She’d expected him to turn, just not quite as fast. Nor had she expected the fury on his face. But for the sake of the program and Dominic’s supposed faith in her, she was willing to try not to be a hard ass. Yet.

  With deliberate coolness, she glanced past him at the strained face of the flight attendant, raised her hand while she gave the big guy a sweet sickly smile, and pulled the flight attendant through the narrow gap between him and the seats.

  “Could you possibly remove the parental locks from my nephew’s inflight entertainment? He doesn’t need it.”

  “Yeah,” the kid blurted, “I want to watch Zombie Fear.”

  He could have done with keeping his mouth closed for a minute, but…

  “What about his mother…?”

  Barbara treated the attendant to an indulgent smile and sideways nod at the woman whose last thought in the world was her son’s viewing habits.

  “I don’t think she’s overly concerned. Do you?”

  The flight attendant leaned over the back of Barbara’s chair to key in her instructions.

  “What the fuck…?” The big guy leaned in, reached past Barbara, and made an unsuccessful snatch at the attendant’s hair. Barbara slipped into his path and blocked the move with her body.

  “I think you need to take your seat, sir.”

  “You can take my seat and stick it up your…”

  The hole she put in his heart was the most effective way to kill him. He was a little too close for a head shot. She would have had to raise her gun, which in turn would have given him the opportunity to make a defensive move. So she rolled with her instinct.

  As he hit the floor, her gaze met the horrified one of the flight attendant, whose mouth gaped open for a full second before Dominic’s voice came out of it.

  “Now, why the hell did you kill him?”

  Laughter bubbled up her throat at the strange sight of a delicate little female with the voice of an Irish devil. Possession was possibly the only answer. There was a lot of it going around.

  When she looked into his face as he removed the helmet from her head, the irritation she saw there made her wonder if he was possessed.

  “It’s a game, Dominic.”

  “It’s not a game, Barbie babe, it’s an exercise. Another test you just failed.” She dipped her head to stare at her empty hands. She could have shot him too for the deliberate misuse of her name. Instead she twitched her fingers to rid herself of the need to pull the trigger. Then she straightened her spine and gave him the attitude she knew he’d expect.

  “Can’t see how I failed it.” She swung her legs to dangle them over the side of the chair before he lowered it, her face still on a level with his, and she pinned him with a narrow-eyed stare. “I shot the terrorist.”

  His quick shoulder jerk had her grinning. “How the hell would you know he was a terrorist? He could have just been an asshole of a passenger on the plane. Maybe he’d drunk too much and was making a nuisance of himself. You could have had him arrested.”

  “Sure I could. That’s why we’re doing this exercise, to see if I can identify a good guy from a…what? A freaking ’nother good guy?”

  “But you didn’t. You simply shot the first challenging guy.”

  “No, I didn’t.” Her answer was smooth and calm, because she had no doubt. She reached out and tapped the left side of Dominic’s jacket. “He hadn’t been drinking. There was no indication of alcohol. His eyes were clear. He was carrying.” She raised her hand and touched the corner of her eye. “He also had a light of fanaticism in his eyes. A light once you’ve seen, you’re never going to forget.” Her throat tightened, but she swallowed past the lump. She’d seen it far too often in her short career. She wasn’t sure she could ever cope with seeing it again, but it wasn’t for Dominic to know. He’d have to put it in his file, and then too many people would find out.

  “Well, I suppose I should thank my lucky stars that at least you never shot the kid.”

  The inside of her mouth turned to dust while she stared at his intent gaze. She knew it was deliberate. Everything the calm, controlled psychiatrist said was designed to garner a response. She was damned if he’d get the reaction he was expecting. She gave a careless shrug and unstuck her tongue from the roof of her mouth.

  “Tempting, but it was his mother who needed the bullet, not him.”

  Dominic’s mouth quirked as he started to remove the wires from her body. His cool fingers brushed against her overheated skin. “Instead you let him watch an R-rated movie.”

  “Sure I did. It was nothing he wouldn’t have already seen in real life.”

  “It was a zombie movie. You’ve probably scarred him for life, made him into a serial killer.” He plucked another wire from her skin and set her system alight.

  Laughter threatened, but she knew Dominic hadn’t finished with her, so she feigned a bored yawn. “No, I think his mother already achieved that. You know, the first sexual experience to dictate your whole life. Remember that theory?” His eyes crinkled at the edges, and his mouth softened, making her crave just a touch of it. She leaned closer and took a chance of inhaling his warm scent.

  He raised the hem of her T-shirt, stopping her breath with the anticipation of the touch of his fingers against her flesh, but instead of putting his hand up, he gave a quick yank to the wire and made her hiss in a breath at the snag on her skin.

  “Sorry.”

  “No problem.”

  “Barbara…”

  “Dominic…”

  They both stopped at the same time they started, and Dominic huffed out a breath, his face so close to hers she could touch her lips against his if she just leaned in.

  If he told her how much he wanted her, she was all his. He just needed to say the word.

  “I don’t think you’re taking these exercises as seriously as you should.”

  It wasn’t exactly the response she’d wanted, and the frustration she felt escaped in an irritable blast. “It’s difficult to when they’re filled with crap. I don’t know who sets the scenarios, but it’s pretty easy to spot the bad guy.”

  “It’s not just about the bad gu
y. It’s about anger management.”

  “I have no anger issues.” It bubbled just below the surface, and the thought of kissing him evaporated.

  “You think?”

  “Do you?”

  His tempestuous gaze met hers as she raised her chin in defiance.

  “Yes, yes. As a matter of fact, I think you do, and I don’t think you’re doing anything to help tackle them.”

  “That’s ’cause I don’t see I have any anger issues.” She hoped he wouldn’t call her on her clenched jaw as she ground her teeth together. There was only one thing that made her angry—people accusing her of being angry, when in fact she was just plain running scared.

  Irritation shimmered off him as he swiped a hand through his thick, black hair and stepped away with a small indication for her to get down.

  “Okay, I think we’ve had enough for today. We’ll resume tomorrow at oh eight hundred hours.”

  Dismissed. He’d just dismissed her with half a day still to get through and nothing to do.

  She perched on the edge of the chair in silence as she watched him pack away the helmet and tuck the wires neatly into their little boxes. For a brief moment in time, she’d thought she was going to cozy with the professor, but he’d soon dispelled her of that idea.

  Sullen as a teenager, she swung her foot in wide circles. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been without anything to occupy her mind. With a few words, he’d made her feel abandoned. What was she supposed to do with herself? Go back to her room and study the walls?

  “Do you have any books in this place?”

  The streak of surprise was worth the question. “Books?”

  “Yeah, those things you read when you have time on your hands.” She’d had a lot of time in the desert, but never since.

  “What do you like to read?”

  She considered him for a moment and wondered if she could fry his intelligent psychiatrist’s brain by telling him she loved nothing more than a sloppy romance, something she could curl up on a chair with and lose herself in the pure magic of the written word. “Thrillers.” There. That should satisfy him. He probably wouldn’t have such a thing as a romance in his collection anyway. She couldn’t imagine Dominic or Zak reading romance. Then again, who was she to judge?