Singathology
Page 47
The old parrot did not speak. But its mind was fixed on old memories.
“Why are you keeping quiet?” asked the cage parrot.
“You dance and are happy upon getting you freedom. But, unlike you, we did not sing, dance, or indulge in revelry.”
The cage parrot was surprised and asked, “Why not?”
“Well, you know, if the Big Crane who is the head bird of our state dances, we the tails will dance. It did not dance; hence we too did not dance and sing.”
The eyes of the cage parrot opened widely and asked, “Why didn’t you dance? Why didn’t you sing?”
“We were indeed happy after we heard that we got our independence. But that happiness did not last long. After independence, the Big Crane came to make a speech. All our merrymaking flew away once we saw its face.”
“We thought that it would come with a smiling face. It was disappointing for us who were assuming that it would be all happiness like when there was a shower of the Indian magnolia everywhere. It did not come with a smiling face. It came with a jaded face.
“It stood on the stage to speak. It looked up at us and cried. All of us who were at the Padang were petrified when we saw it cry.”
All the beaks of the birds trembled nervously as the old parrot said, “The birds inside nest holes also writhed in pain as they saw the black-white scene remotely. It was difficult to control the tears.”
The eyes of all the parrots welled up with tears upon seeing it cry.
“Why are you all crying? Do not cry! Wipe off your tears!” said the cage parrot.
All the parrots wiped their tears with the tip of their wings.
There was absolute silence for a moment. “Why did the Big Crane cry?” asked the cage parrot softly.
With a faltering voice, the old parrot said, “Only the abandoned young bird would know about loneliness.”
“The young bird must fly through forests and hills before the wings can grow properly. It has to get drenched in the rain and swirl in the storm. It must recover from being burnt by the scorching sun. It must have thought that this is no child’s play. That is why the Big Crane broke down in tears,” it said, pausing for a while. It then wiped away its tears and stood up smartly.
“The Big Crane did not get weary because of that. It vowed to scale the heights and was adamant to do so. It drowned itself in deep thoughts. It found creative ways and innovated.
“The Big Crane was like the proverbial heron mentioned in the Thirukkural Couplet 490: ‘At the time when one should use self-control, let him restrain himself like a heron, and let him, like it, strike when there is a favourable opportunity.’ When the opportune time came, it seized the opportunity and it jabbed at the fish without missing its aim and proved successful in its action.
“Similarly all the birds also toiled together with it.
“The country developed and reached its peak. We have a very high standard of living. We are praising the Big Crane,” it said with lots of emotions, raising its chest in pride.
The cage bird had gooseflesh. The wings stiffened with excitement.
“You are all gifted birds. That is why you all have such an unblemished white Big Crane,” said the cage bird.
The old parrot was happy upon hearing its compliments. But, at the very next moment, its face became jaded when it recalled what the big black crow said.
“We are indeed privileged birds. But…,” it droned.
As the cage bird was asking “Why are you dragging your words?”, the weaver bird which belonged to the old parrot’s generation came flying hurriedly. It repressed its wings nervously by its side and sat on a small branch opposite the old parrot.
The weaver bird who came with a sad face assumed that the old parrot was also sad when it saw its jaded face and asked, “So you, too, have come to know of it as well?”
The parrots gathered there could not comprehend anything. All the parrots looked at it in astonishment. The old parrot also looked at it.
“I do not understand anything at all! What are you referring to when you ask whether it has been known?” it asked.
“Our kingfisher has closed its eyes for good! That is what I wanted to know whether you too have knowledge of it!”
The old parrot was startled. The other parrots were also shocked.
“The kingfisher is dead! It was all right before!”
“It was all right! But I don’t know why it died! Apparently the big black crow must have informed the kingfisher of whatever it had told us! The kingfisher must have thinking about it, and that was why it had died after it had refused to take any food. You know that the Big Crane was very dear to it!”
The old parrot who was thinking of many things asked, “Do you know why it died?”
As the weaver bird said “I do not know!”, it could not believe its own eyes because the kingfisher who it just said was dead flew in together with the two young parrots who went in search of the kingfisher.
The old parrot opened its mouth widely in surprise when it saw the kingfisher. At the same time, it looked at the weaver bird with fiery eyes.
It asked, “You have deliberately lied that the kingfisher was dead when it is very much alive! Do you have any brains? It is now here standing right in front of you! What are you going to say to this?”
The weaver bird cringed in shame and said, “I believed what the birds said en route.”
“Can you believe all that the birds flying to and fro on your way say? Can you blabber like this without knowing the truth? You scorched my heart for a while by throwing hot coals,” grieved the old parrot.
“It believed some of the rumours created by some birds! That is all,” said the kingfisher.
The young parrots which flew along with it said, “Yes, that is so!”
The old parrot looked at the two young parrots.
“All right then, you were here, weren’t you? Then how did you happen to come along with this bird?’ it asked.
The young bird smiled as it hung its head and said, “To help you!”
“To help me?”
“Yes! We do not know what the big black crow told you. Therefore, we, this young parrot and I, went to meet the kingfisher and weaver bird to find that out and help you.”
“But… we are not able to see the weaver bird. We only saw the kingfisher. After that big black crow left after seeing you, it went to see the kingfisher as well,” said the other young parrot.
Immediately the old parrot said, “I thought as much! I sensed that, after visiting me, the crow would visit my friends as well.”
“It also went and told stories to the kingfisher. You know what happened next? The kingfisher also suffered the same fate as you. Just like how you were upset and did not eat the fruits, it did likewise and even suffered giddy spells and fainted.”
“Is that so?” asked the old parrot.
“Yes! When this kingfisher fell, the young kingfishers came and rescued it and placed it in its nest hole. Thereafter, this kingfisher remained in its nest. It did not go out to fish!”
“In that case, why did the weaver bird say that this one has died?”
“Oh, that? You know the big crow which met the kingfisher on the first day went again the next day to meet the kingfisher. Do you know why it went again? It went again to see the extent of detriment the laxative it had given to the kingfisher had caused.”
“What are you saying? Is the crow so bad and to that extent?”
“Yes! That one is a bad bird! When it went there, it did not go without anything. It grasped a dead rat that it found on the way.”
“When it went there, the kingfisher was nowhere to be found. The disappointed big black crow sat at the fishing spot and devoured the dead rat it had in its mouth. When it was butchering the rat, it apparently slipped from its grip.
“Before the rat could fall into the water, the big black crow leapt to catch it. But it was not able to do so. It fell together with the rat, head first into the water. Bef
ore it could swim ashore, the hungry piranhas ate it. The big black crow became a prey to those fish with sharp teeth!”
“Oh what a pity!”
“You should not pity it!” said one parrot.
“Then what happened?” asked the old parrot.
“Some birds which did not realise what actually had happened thought that the kingfisher had died and thus spread a rumour.”
All the parrots looked at the kingfisher.
“Why are you looking at me like that? Do not be afraid that the kingfisher who is supposedly dead is back. Do not be afraid! I am not dead! I am alive!” laughed the kingfisher.
At that moment, there was a melodious sound from the sky. All the birds looked up. A flock of little sparrows were flying and making a shrieking sound.
“Oh my goodness, look at them! Now one can see these sparrows after a long time,” said one young parrot.
“Yes, indeed! Some good Samaritans saved this breed from destruction,” said the young parrot.2
“Where are these sparrows flying to?” asked the old parrot.
“Don’t you know? They are all going to celebrate our nation’s birthday. You get ready too. Let us also go to celebrate the birthday,” it said.
“I am not coming! You and the other birds can go!”
“Why do you refuse to come?”
“I do not wish to go!”
“That is why I am asking the reason! As pioneer birds, shouldn’t we be the first ones to be present there? Mmm… get ready!”
The old parrot said again, “I feel unsettled! All of you can go.”
“My mind is unsettled. The big crow came and told me the same thing that it had told you. Does that mean that I am still thinking about it? No! I am going to put it aside and am going there. You too must come. We shall all leave with the young parrots,” said the kingfisher.
The rest of the parrots screamed, “If you do not go, we will not go too. We will not celebrate the birthday that you do not celebrate.”
The old parrot could not refuse. It was not able to ignore what its friends were telling it.
“All right, we will go!” it said half-heartedly.
All the birds were extremely happy. They sang as they flew high up. When one looked from the sky, the growth of the city was very obvious to the eyes. At the same time, the scenes of the past flashed before the eyes of the old parrot.
“Oh my goodness! What a great transformation!” said the kingfisher.
“I cannot believe my very own eyes! I feel amazed! There is no trace of the old place!” said the weaver bird.
The old parrot and its bird friends travelled as they sang praises of the old scenery and the attraction of the new.
“Dearest darlings, the fruits of our labour is flashing before your eyes now. Likewise, you must flash the fruits of your labour before the eyes of your young ones when you grow old.”
As if they had rehearsed, all the parrots shouted in unison, “We will also flash the fruits of our labour before the eyes of our young ones. Yes! We will do that!”
All the birds reached the Padang. Multi-coloured birds had already gathered there before them. Patterns of tiny red and white flowers were painted on the tiny cheeks of the tiny young birds.
Their short chuckle stole the hearts of all the birds. Indeed, it was an occasion for the society of birds to be in exhilaration. The younger generations of birds who toiled for the nation were walking in a row. The crowd that had gathered flapped their wings creating music and sang to welcome them. The Big Crane, the sculptor of creativity, appeared wearing white. The society of birds that had gathered was elated. The roar of the flapping wings reached the skies.
When the old parrot witnessed that scene, its blood vessels were filled with new invigorating blood, and the pulse and veins stiffened with vitality. The shoulders itched. It stood up flapping its wings and danced with glee. The young parrots who saw that stood up filled with emotions. The old parrot’s bird friends also joined in. The sun birds were there too. Everything flowed in abundance. The sky clapped with thunder. The stars burst in the sky illuminating the universe.
The weaver bird asked the old parrot basking in happiness, “Please, at least now say what the big black crow told you.”
“Tell us! Tell us!” pleaded the young parrots.
The old parrot danced, sang, and said, “Nothing to worry. After all, the Big Crane has come to celebrate the birthday.”
1 A veiled reference to Bartahiyar, a poet of Tamil Nadu while it was under British colonial rule.
2 A reference to reports that the sparrows have almost become extinct in Tamil Nadu.
Post-中年
作者：吴耀宗
永远天空不落下缤纷的玫瑰
当我们欲望更多, 以及更多
除了蒸发灵魂给高迥的云彩
除了等待雨脚在屋檐上践踩时间
被旁观的躯体
尖刻如刀
窗下, 把笔记本膨胀的格言重新咀嚼
竟触发埋伏良久的蛀牙
摸索智慧, 取代不了深深的痛苦
当冰崖融解成收拾不住的水
当黑影在身后行使涂鸦的权力
依然我在你面前变出白兔和花束
从天天活着的帽子
post-middle age
BY GABRIEL WU YEOW CHONG
Translated by Jeremy Tiang
nevermore will the sky rain down colourful roses
when our desires grow larger and even larger
apart from our spirits evaporating to join distant clouds
apart from rain feet trampling time on our rooftops
the spectating carcasses
sharp as knives
beneath the window, chew once more the bloated notebook maxims
till they touch a rotten tooth that’s been long hidden
searching for knowledge is no replacement for deep pain
when ice cliffs melt into water you cannot keep
when dark shadows behind you exercise their right to mark you
I remain before you, producing white rabbits and flowers
from the hat of my daily living
岛国意象
作者：刘瑞金
重新拾起画笔，就好像再次走入一座孤独的丛林。
那座静静地横卧在热带的版图中，被密密的绿叶覆盖着的丛林。丛林恍若与世隔绝般，似乎没能看见有一条能通向外面世界的清楚的路径。或许依稀可以窥见一些仿佛是前人走过所遗留下的小径的痕迹，但那模糊的印记显然不是刻意开采出来的。
把画笔沾上不同颜色的颜料，沾在摊开的白色的画布上，顿时有如时空交错般，仿佛是要开始将一段童话般七彩的故事娓娓道来一般。然而这样的故事却不知要从哪年哪月说起。在构思冥想的过程中，一番混沌的思绪仿佛在空气中旋转翻腾，最终落到眼睛看不到的位置上。
我无法把梦中所看到的那幅景象转化成画布上的画，就好像我无法把脑海里构思的那种意境写成一首诗。诗歌可以写得意识流，画作可以画成印象派，却也无法准确地反映梦中脑海里的景象和意境之一二。
梦境很美。我常常在梦中醒来，然后懊恼梦醒时分梦已消逝。消逝得完全没有留下任何痕迹。尽管我身体的每一个部分总似乎在提醒我当下是活在现实的世界里。我躺着的地方是我熟悉的房间，深褐色的壁纸还是一样展现它略微凸显的质感，即使只是触目所及。天台上挂着的风铃还是随着风的吹拂在摇摆着清脆的铃声。
***
把画架架好后，我开始构思一幅岛国的风景图。从很久以前，我就开始这样思考岛国的意象，或美其名是代表南洋的图腾。从远古以来，我们常常都对着某种图腾进行膜拜与敬仰。我自然不想把岛国的意象变成明信片上的那种生硬的风景画。这座岛原本就是一座孤独的丛林。我们的�
�辈们也曾经迷失了好久，历尽了千辛万苦、百转千回才从丛林中找到了出路走了出来，这过程中也从覆盖着的密林中看到正午阳光的倾泻。
阳光很好。我沿着阳光的照射线看过去，一些已经存在了好几百年的石块上开始出现不规则的脚印。我很讶异我之前竟从未发现。那明显不是我自己的脚印。我发现原来在我走到这里之前，或许已经有不少人走过，从迷雾中走出来。
我正构思我的画应该以什么颜色为底色。白色其实最简单，用色最少，然而朴实中却也过于单调。我常常都有灵光一闪的想法或者念头以一种桀骜不驯或放荡不羁的景象或不安于室的诗句在脑中浮现。这样的想法或念头常常跳跃性地在我的灵魂里打转。我想起北半球秋天时候徐徐的落叶，或者樱花在空中纷飞时候的模样，我该在落叶或樱花纷飞时就拿起相机的，可是每一次按下快门之后，照片中只能看到落叶和樱花撒满一地的样子。
满地黄花堆积。堆积的不仅是黄花，还有一地的落叶，还有美丽的梦境。
那一日，风卷云舒，云淡风轻。
然后我尝试把颜料混合起来，想看看究竟能混出怎样意想不到的色彩。色彩的浓度适合抒写怎样的心绪。在天色将黑以前，是否能把白天的阳光画进画布里？在阳光倾泻的丛林或者画室中，我仿佛看见画室的窗上有一抹日晕的反射。
轻轻地，就这样把步伐开展开来，顺着泥快铺成的山路走下去。热带的丛林散发一种习惯性的忧郁，偶尔会遇见一朵羞涩的花朵，在万绿丛中成为一枝独秀。从覆盖的绿叶倾泻而下的阳光洒在褐色的泥地上。我想着要如何把这样的景况涂抹在我准备好的画布上。
岛国究竟是一幅怎样的意象？是许多的钢骨水泥所营造的大都会的印影？城市的摩天楼比肩继踵、直耸入云地比高，南岸的高速公路从水平线上铺展长长地延展最后消失在海底。美丽的体育城摇曳多姿并摩拳擦掌地开枝散叶，对着美丽的滨海跃跃欲试的加冷盆地洋溢着一幅欣欣向荣的姿态，即便已临知天命之年，却依然年轻奔放。