Stories of Faith and Courage from the War in Iraq and Afghanistan

by Jane Hampton Cook

  After the president’s speech, I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned to see a White House staff member. She asked me and my wife to come with her, because the president wanted to meet us.

  Stunned, we grabbed our two sons that were with us and followed her back into an empty conference room. A short time later, the Secret Service opened the door and President Bush entered, walked up to my wife, pulled her in for a hug and a kiss, and said, “I wish I could heal the hole in your heart.” He then grabbed me for a hug, as well as each of our sons. Then he turned and said, “Everybody out.” Not even a Secret Service agent remained.

  “Come on let’s sit down and talk,” he said. He slumped down in a chair, completely relaxed, smiled, and suddenly was no longer the president; he was just a guy with a job, sitting around talking with us like a family member at a barbeque. For the twenty minutes, he put everything and everyone on hold to meet with the family of a Private First Class who gave his life for his country. The President shared his private self with us in the process.

  What an incredible lesson on service. We weren’t on the itinerary and Air Force One was late because of it. If the president of the United States is willing to drop everything on his plate to visit with a family, surely the rest of us can do it. No one is above serving another person, and no one is so lofty that he or she can’t treat others with dignity and respect.

  Prayer:

  Lord, show me where I fall short of showing others the respect they deserve.

  “Show proper respect to everyone.” (1 Peter 2:17a)

  July 21

  NEW PERSPECTIVE ON SERVICE

  Lt. Col. Mark Murphy (USAF), 354th Maintenance Group Deputy Commander

  For the next twenty minutes, President Bush talked with us about our son, Iraq, faith in God, convictions, his family and his feelings about nearing the end of his presidency. He asked each of our teenaged sons what they wanted to do in life and counseled them to set goals, stick to their convictions, and not worry about being the “cool” guy.

  He said that he’d taken a large amount of heat during his tenure and was under considerable pressure to do what was politically expedient, but he was proud to say that he never sold his soul. Sometimes he laughed, and at other times he teared up. He said that what he’ll miss most after leaving office will be his role as Commander in Chief.

  He thanked us for the opportunity to meet, because he felt a heavy responsibility knowing that our son died because of a decision he made. He was incredibly humble, full of warmth, and completely without pretense.

  We couldn’t believe how long he talked to us, but he seemed to be in no hurry whatsoever. In the end he thanked us again for the visit and for the opportunity to get off his feet for a few minutes. He then said, “Let’s get some pictures.” The doors flew open, Secret Service and the White House photographer came in, and suddenly he was the President again. A few pictures, more thank yous, a few more hugs, and he was gone.

  The remarkable thing about the whole event was that he didn’t have to see us at all. But he put everything on hold to meet privately with the family of a Private First Class who gave his life in the service of his country.

  You often think of service in terms of sacrificing yourself for someone in a higher position, but how often do you remember that serving someone below you can be much more important? If you’re in a leadership capacity, take a good look at how you’re treating your people, and remember that your role involves serving the people you rely on every day.

  Prayer:

  Lord, cultivate within me a spirit of service for everyone regardless of their social or professional status.

  “Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men.” (Ephesians 6:7)

  July 22

  AMBUSH AT ROBERTS RIDGE

  Capt. Nate Self, Army Ranger, Afghanistan (2002–2003); Iraq (2003–2004)

  Around three a.m. on March 4, 2002, Army Ranger Nate Self and his thirteen-man Quick Reaction Force were sent to recover a fallen Navy SEAL in Afghanistan, a place teeming with hundreds of al-Qaeda fighters.

  “There was no place on earth more hostile to U.S. soldiers and no place would my team rather be,” Self recalled. “We were there because we were Rangers, and we had a creed to uphold: Never leave a fallen comrade!”

  Self and his team weren’t told that helicopters that had been sent to the mountain (later named Roberts Ridge) had come under fire. When the Chinook helicopter was shot down in an ambush, a fifteen-hour firefight ensued.

  Bullets whizzed past Self, rocket-propelled grenades ripped through the air around him. Self began to plan a counterattack on the high-caliber machine-gun bunker, even though he was bleeding from a shrapnel wound in his leg.

  Hours of fighting dragged on as Self and his men tried to stabilize the area enough for helicopters to come in and evacuate the wounded. In the meantime, fellow soldiers lay bleeding in the snow all around them as they fought off the enemy at such close range they could see their faces.

  Self and his men found the fallen SEAL who had been killed with a shot to the head, and also located the body of a dead U.S. serviceman from the first failed rescue attempt. Three of Self’s men were killed in that daylong battle on the mountain. But if not for Self’s clear thinking and strong leadership, the casualties would have been even more.

  Senior officers back at the base heaped praise upon Self and his team for being able to get off the mountain and kill the enemy without sustaining greater losses especially since they had been caught unaware.

  For Self, the battle resulted in a Silver Star for valor, a Purple Heart, and later, a position of honor as President Bush’s guest for the 2003 State of the Union address. To those watching, Capt. Self represented strength, resolve, and success of the military.

  But Self didn’t want to be honored. In fact, by 2004, he wanted to die.

  Prayer:

  Lord, when I feel ambushed by uncontrollable circumstances, give me wisdom and guidance to make the right decisions.

  “How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?” (Psalm 13:2)

  July 23

  INVISIBLE BATTLE

  Capt. Nate Self, Army Ranger, Afghanistan (2002–2003); Iraq (2003–2004)

  Severe post-traumatic stress disorder had delivered a near-fatal blow to this war hero; he left the Army in late 2004, cutting short a would-be military career. Vivid nightmares, anxiety, anger, and self-destructive behavior took hold of him.

  “I just hated myself,” said Self. “I felt like I was somebody different. And since I didn’t feel like I could be who I was before and hated who I was now, I wanted to kill the new person. I felt like I had messed up everything in my life. The easiest way, the most cowardly way to escape was to just depart.”

  Though he never asked for help or told anyone he was contemplating suicide, Self’s parents intervened to direct him to the help he needed. Christian Army chaplains trained in PTSD provided counseling, and he went to group therapy sessions at the VA. But he also joined a small group for vets with PTSD at his church, First Baptist Church in Belton, Texas. The leader was his chaplain counselor.

  “At the VA small group, we talked about symptoms, but we were never allowed to talk about our experiences because they were afraid it would trigger us. But it was those experiences we needed to talk about the most. At the church, we got into God’s Word, bathed all sessions in prayer, told our stories, wrote about and shared our experiences and that was extremely therapeutic. We looked at spiritual solutions and examples of warriors in the Bible. Turning my PTSD into Christian service has helped me get past to the other side of it.”

  The writing that Capt. Self began at church developed into his memoir, Two Wars: One Hero’s Fight on Two Fronts Abroad and Within (Tyndale House, May 2008). Self also helps train churches from New York to San Diego on PTSD by sharing his testimony through Bridges to Healing.

  “There are many thing
s in life we go through that God allows for specific reasons,” said Self. “We can be hurt by things over which we have no control. That doesn’t mean it’s not fair, but neither does it mean that God needs to take it away, God can use the thorn in the side the anguish is there for a reason.”

  Prayer:

  Lord, help me allow you to shine through my weaknesses so people will see your glory.

  “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take [the thorn in my flesh] away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness.’” (2 Corinthians 12:8–9a)

  July 24

  NOT IN BONDAGE

  Capt. Nate Self, Army Ranger, Afghanistan (2002–2003); Iraq (2003–2004)

  Today, Capt. Self’s PTSD is much less severe, but some symptoms still remain. He still has haunting dreams most nights, intrusive thoughts, and certain problems with anger. He still feels somewhat emotionally numb. While he used to wonder if complete healing was possible, he has since decided that answer doesn’t matter.

  “I don’t know if it’s right to say, ‘I want to be healed from all this,’ because it’s a very humbling thing to be in this position and know that I’m being held in grace,” he said. “It equips me for better ministry and service. To wish away this thorn in my side would remove a significant portion of my testimony. It’s not that I have to be in bondage to PTSD. What matters is, now that I have it, what am I going to do with it?”

  Self now works as a consultant on officer-training materials for the Army and is active in his own church’s military ministry, which serves one hundred military families in their three thousand-member church.

  When Self was experiencing darker days with PTSD, members of his church reached out and listened to him. Now, he’s passing it along. “When soldiers come home, I’ll take them to breakfast or lunch as soon as I can,” he says. “They need people to be interested, to show that they care. If people think that the VA hospital will solve all the problems, they’ll overlook the greatest source of healing in any situation Jesus. The majority component for recovery is a spiritual solution, more than any secular clinical answer.”

  Even as Capt. Self works toward healing, he realizes that his symptoms may never go away, and he has a peace about that. “Look at Job,” he said. “All that stuff happened to him, he did not deserve. He kept asking God why until God said, ‘Look, don’t ask me why until you understand why I laid the foundations of the earth. You need to be comfortable with my sovereignty.’”

  Prayer:

  Lord, teach me to be more interested in your character and sovereignty than I am in securing comfort for myself.

  “Then Job replied to the LORD: ‘I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted.’” (Job 42:1–2)

  July 25

  SAFETY IN GOD’S HAND

  Vanessa Peters, wife of Capt. Dave Peters, U.S. Air Force

  Most folks of my parents’ generation remember exactly where they were when they heard the news that JFK had been shot. For my generation, we remember where we were on September 11, 2001.

  I sat in a roomful of women where we had gathered for Bible study. The church secretary interrupted our meeting to tell us what had happened and to ask us to pray, which we did immediately. Unaware of the extent of the attacks, we simply prayed for God’s providence to prevail, and asked him to comfort those affected by acts of terrorism.

  Being a newlywed and rookie military wife, my first thought went to my husband. He had just become mission qualified, and was on his first long temporary duty trip (TDY) as a pilot on the C-5 Galaxy. He told me that he was in Egypt, and the crew carried ravens (military police officers) “just in case.” I hadn’t heard from him in a couple days.

  I left Bible study, and raced to a nearby friend’s house to turn on the TV, where I saw images of Egyptians dancing in the streets and celebrating the demise of Americans. This was where my husband’s first mission had taken him.

  I took a deep breath and whispered a silent prayer: “Lord, keep my husband from danger or harm. Bring him home safely. I’m not ready to be a widow. Yet, not my will, but yours be done.”

  As I drove home, a large line of cars lined the highway nearing the exit to the base. Military police were searching vehicles and thoroughly checking ID’s, even to get into base housing. As I waited, my mind began to wander. Was he on the ground? In the air? Could he contact me?

  When I arrived, the answering machine light blinked to indicate that I had a message. Thankfully, it was my sweet husband, telling me that he had been in the air en route to England when the attacks occurred. “Thank you, Lord.” I exhaled as I praised God for this good news. God had known my husband’s location all along safely in the palm of His capable hand.

  Prayer:

  Lord, keep me safely in the center of your will, even if dangers surround.

  “The LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.” (Psalm 121:8)

  Capt. Dave Peters, U.S. Air Force, prior to his deployment to Iraq in 2003

  Dave Peters and his wife Vanessa

  July 26

  GOOD NEWS FROM BAGHDAD

  Capt. Dave Peters, U.S. Air Force

  As I watched the news coming over Armed Forces Network (AFN) in the dining hall on April 9, 2003, I saw the old statue of Saddam Hussein being toppled in the city square in Iraq. It was another “routine” day for me in Moron, Spain a convenient stopover for the C-5 Galaxy in Europe. We were carrying materials to support those men who were accomplishing the seemingly clean sweep through Iraq. It was business as usual, a sunny stopover, but this bright day had a little more shine on it with the good news from the front and an opportunity to write my wife:

  “Looks like some good news from the front with Baghdad falling and statues toppling… I am proud that I got to contribute to the effort and even more grateful to my lovely, wonderful wife who supports me so much—you really do make my job easier knowing that you have a great attitude and want to support me however you can… I thank God for you and hope to be back home soon…”

  Only eighteen days before, the victory was no sure bet. Our mission that night had us bound for Kuwait to drop off some support equipment for the 101st Airborne. From our vantage point above the Red Sea, we could see Naval vessels kicking off the “Shock & Awe” campaign by launching Cruise Missiles into Iraq. Once we arrived in Kuwait, we made several rushes to the bunkers, donning chemical defense gear, and anxiously awaiting the sirens to silence. As the threat dropped, we quickly prepared the aircraft for a return flight to Spain and left the theater uneventfully, wondering if more uncertain nights were on the horizon.

  As it turned out, that is as perilous as my encounters with the enemy were. The long hours flying across the oceans and continents, constant uncertainty of alert schedules, and many days apart from family posed the more challenging threat. My exposure to the thorny battlefields in Iraq was brief and distant, mostly from miles above the action. But my satisfaction in playing a role in our nation’s war was no less sure than the soldier who patrolled the streets of Fallujah.

  Prayer:

  Lord, be sovereign over the nations; may your will be done in the governments of the earth.

  “Rise up, O God, judge the earth, for all the nations are your inheritance.” (Psalm 82:8)

  July 27

  “WE’VE GOT TO BE A TARGET”

  Capt. Tom Joyce, U.S. Navy (Ret.)

  September 11, 2001 started off just like any other day. As a Deputy for Naval Aviation, I arrived to work at the Pentagon in Arlington, Virginia, around 5:30 a.m. so I could have Bible study and prayer time before the day got going. Forty-five minutes later I immersed myself in working on budget figures for Congress, because we were trying to request some new aircraft and weapons systems.

  “Captain Joyce.” I glanced at the clock as a Navy commander came by my desk. Two hours had passed already. “You need to come take a look at this airplane that just hit the World
Trade Center,” she said.

  “It’s probably just a small Cessna that had taken off at one of the regional airports there, maybe lost its way in the fog and ran into one of the towers,” I said, not giving it any second thought.

  “No, you need to come take a look at it,” she responded.

  So we went to the office next door, and watched the aftermath of the first plane that hit the first tower. We watched it until we saw the second airplane hit the tower.

  “It’s a coordinated attack,” the guy next to me blurted out. As an aide to the admiral, his military mindset kicked in. He picked up the phone on the desk and immediately dialed to a friend of his who was on watch at the National Military Command Center in the bowels of the Pentagon. The NMCC is the place from which wars are run.

  “What do we got?” he asked.

  In a coded message, the response came back: “We’ve got other planes that are hijacked. We’re under attack. We don’t know from who.”

  Looking at each other in that fifth floor office of the Pentagon, we said, “We’ve got to be a target.” We knew it was only a matter of time.

  Prayer:

  Lord, let me not forget that even in times of war and terror, you have not relinquished your sovereignty.

  “…there is terror on every side; they conspire against me and plot to take my life.” (Psalm 31:13)