Destined

by A L Makin

  “Stop trying to talk yourself out of this … out of us,” he says.

  “I’m not,” I lie.

  He looks at me with a straight face. A flash of black quickly sweeps across his eyes and then disappears.

  “Don’t lie to me Willow. I can see it written all over your face. I won’t let you do it, not again. I’ll be damned if I let you go, and I’ll kill anyone who tries to get in our way.”

  “Can you honestly say that what we have is worth everything that could happen? To you … your family … your House … to Travis? Can you honestly say we’re worth it?” I plead.

  “Yes,” he says bluntly.

  “How?” I ask.

  “I can’t explain it. I just know that what we feel now is only a fraction of what’s to come. We’re destined to be together, I know it. I don’t know why or how yet. But I can feel it in every fibre of my being that we are. That might sound selfish, but I don’t give a shit. You’re mine Willow and I’m yours. Anyone who tries to come in our way will be met by my dark side, and I promise now that I won’t be held responsible for what I do. I can’t be without you Willow, and I don’t care what it costs.”

  Ryder once again shocks me with his words. On the surface, you wouldn’t think he’d be capable of such passion, but I’ve been reminded on a few occasions now that he is much more than what you see.

  “I know you’re right. I don’t want to lose you either. The thought of it kills me, so the reality of it would be sure to finish me off. We need to come up with a plan then. To make this as easy for everyone as possible. Hopefully, then we can avoid any kind of war,” I answer.

  He gives me a lopsided smile.

  “I love your optimism. We need a plan, I agree. But we need to plan for battle. No matter how bad you think it might get, the reality is, it’s going to be far worse than what you can predict; and we need to be prepared,” he finishes standing up.

  He holds out a hand to help me up and I take it. His grip is cold and strong. He tugs me into his body hard, and I crash against his chest as he looks down at me with hooded eyes.

  “From now on, it’s me and you against the world,” he says breathlessly.

  “Me and you,” I repeat back just before he crushes his lips to mine. The kiss is deep and wanting and makes my head spin.

  We stay locked together until we have no choice but to come up for air. My lips ache without his kiss.

  “Do you want to come in?” I ask.

  He groans loudly. “You have no idea how much I want to come in. But I can’t. I need to go back and think of a plan of how I’m going to break the news to Liliana. The longer she’s left in the dark, the worse it’s going to be for everyone.”

  “If you stay, we can think of a plan together,” I try to protest.

  He smiles and cups the side of my face. “We both know there is no chance I’m going to be able to think of anything but being with you if I come in this evening,” he finishes leaning in and kissing me passionately.

  I wrap my arms around his waist as he gently locks his fingers in my hair.

  We stay connected kissing for a few more minutes, neither one wanting to let go first when the sound of Max barking on the other side of the door disturbs us and we pull away from each other.

  “I think that’s Max’s way of telling you goodnight,” I laugh.

  He smiles as he gently holds my hand and lifts it to his lips, kissing the back of it. “I’ll come and see you tomorrow evening, is that ok?”

  “Yeah, of course,” I reply.

  “Tomorrow then,” he says before turning and walking down the drive. He gives me one last look before disappearing behind the garden wall. I wave goodbye, unlock the door and go inside. Somehow I don’t think I’ll be getting much sleep again.

  Chapter Thirteen

  I was right. I tossed and turned in bed all night long replaying different scenarios of how our relationship being made public, could play out. None seemed to go smooth. Maybe we just have to bite the bullet and take whatever comes.

  It’s early evening and the sun has gone down. I’ve just got out of the shower and dress in black leggings and a long cream knitted jumper.

  I thought Ryder would have been here by now, and I can’t help but worry that something has happened to him. I feel antsy and on edge waiting for him.

  My hair is still damp from the shower, so I dry it quickly hoping I’ll still hear the door when Ryder arrives. My hair dries in record time and I’m just finishing brushing it as I hear a knock at the door. I rush downstairs and open the door wide as I’m greeted by the sight of Ryder dressed in black jeans and a white t-shirt. Looking at him, I can’t help but admire just how good looking and perfect he is.

  With hooded eyes and his chest heaving, he doesn’t waste any time as he steps forward, grabs me around the waist and pulls me in tight as he captures my lips with his. I take in a deep lungful of his scent of soap and cologne … he smells amazing. His grip tightens on me as he lifts me off the ground. Instinctively I wrap my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his waist trying to pull him in even closer, but there is no space left between us. Holding me tight while locked together, he steps forward and closes the door behind him using his foot. It slams shut making Max bark in protest. Reluctantly we stop kissing and I turn to look over my shoulder.

  “Quiet Max,” I call out.

  Max barks once more, then turns away and walks back off towards the kitchen. I turn back to face Ryder resting our foreheads against each other.

  “Something tells me Max wants his dinner. Typical bloke always thinking of his stomach” I laugh. “Wait while I feed him?” I ask smiling.

  He nods, kissing me on the forehead as he lowers me gently to the ground. Following me into the kitchen, I crouch down to feed Max while asking, “So, you have you managed to come up with a plan on what we’re going to do?”

  “No, not yet. No matter which way I play it out in my mind, House Zanak is seriously pissed with me for going back on my word, especially when at the same time I’m rejecting their daughter for another woman as well,” he answers.

  I stay crouched on the floor as I stare off into space. My mind whirls with a hive of thoughts. All possible consequences for everyone involved just so Ryder and I can be together. And for a brief moment, I doubt our decision to be together thinking that maybe we should call ‘us’ off before Liliana finds out. But then I imagine what my future would look like without Ryder in it, and realise that that’s not an option. I can’t be without him, not even for a moment.

  I’m snapped out of my thoughts by the feeling of Ryder kneeling in front of me and gently touching my shoulder. “Hey Willow, you okay?”

  I blink a couple of times, focusing on the beautiful man in front of me.

  “Me? Yeah, why?”

  Ryder’s brow furrows as he moves his hand from my shoulder to stroke down the side of my face. The simple touch is featherlight and intimate, “You totally spaced on me there for a moment. Where did you go?”

  I tell him the truth about my split-second doubt about us being together. He stands up while reaching out for me to take his hand, helping me up with ease. With our fingers remaining entwined, he looks down to me.

  His bright blue eyes stare deep into my soul, “Look, I’m not saying that what we are about to encounter is going to be easy, for either of us, because it’s not. It’s gonna be a complete shitstorm for sure, but I refuse to let them come between us.

  “But how?” I ask.

  “It’s simple. When it comes to keeping you in my life, I won’t hesitate in killing anyone who dares to stand in our way, or who tries to tear us apart. If that means burning House Zanak down to the ground and everyone in it, then so be it. Like I’ve said before - you’re mine Willow, and I’m yours. I’ve been given a second chance to be with you, I’ll be damned if I let them destroy that,” he growls as his eyes flicker to black.

  Dark feelings fill the air around us as Ryder’s emotions go into overdr
ive. I need to placate him, calm him down. I unlock my fingers from his and place my palms on his chest against the soft white cotton t-shirt and smile up at him, “hopefully it doesn’t come to that,” I try and soothe.

  It works. With one arm wrapped around me, holding me close, he uses the other to stroke my hair running down my back. Leaning in he rests his forehead against mine. When he looks back at me again his eyes have returned to the familiar bright blue I know and love.

  “Whats say we get out of here?” he says as he twirls some of my hair around his finger. “I’ve got a surprise for you,” he smiles.

  “A surprise? What is it?” I ask excitedly. No man has ever made me feel the way Ryder does, as pathetic as that sounds.

  “If I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?” he laughs.

  I think for a moment for an excuse to get him to tell me, but I’m left blank. “Suppose not,” I smile.

  With Max tucking into his dinner, we make our way to the front door. I slide on my black boots, grab my coat and lock the door as we leave. Walking down the driveway, our hands interlocked, a warm feeling passes over me and it takes me a moment to recognise what it is … it’s happiness. I’m happy. Really happy. It’s been such a long time since I’ve felt like this, that I almost forgot what it was.

  We head towards town. Reaching the path which leads alongside the woods, Ryder stops me and turns us so we’re facing each other.

  He looks me straight in the eye. “Look, Willow, before we carry on, I need you to know something.” His brow is furrowed making him look serious. I can sense him hesitating about what he’s going to say next, and it has me worried.

  I swallow hard, half of me not wanting to ask what comes out of my mouth in fear of the answer, “What … what is it?”

  He takes a deep breath, “You’ve changed me,” he declares simply, but it has me confused none the less.

  “I’ve changed you?” I repeat, and he nods his head. “But I don’t understand what you mean? How have I changed you?” I ask shaking my head slowly.

  Ryder reaches out and holds on to both my hands with his. The coldness of his touch makes me automatically look down at our connected hands. My hands look so delicate and small in his large grip. Staring at every crease and mark on his beautiful pale flesh, I can’t help but imagine what kind of atrocities these hands have inflicted during his lifetime.

  Lost in thought, I’ve not noticed that Ryder has let go of one of my hands and I’m brought back by the feeling of him stroking down the side of my face with the back of his hand. He cups my chin and lifts my face to meet his. He sighs and gives a small smile, eyes filled with turmoil.

  “There’s something you need to know Willow,” he pauses as he takes a deep breath. “Since meeting you, I’ve found that I’m at war with myself.”

  “What do you mean?” I ask.

  “I mean, that I’m fighting with myself to be a better person … for you. You deserve someone as good and as kind as you are. Who can love you like you deserve to be loved ...” He pauses again, and I can tell he’s struggling to share how he’s feeling. “I’ll admit, I’ve never been the type of person to do the right thing or put other people first. But to be with you, I need to be that man, the man you deserve. So that’s why you’ve changed me.”

  As I listen to him explain how he’s trying to change to be better. How he’s working to be good, I can’t miss the undeniable pain in his voice. He sounds tortured and conflicted, like being “good” goes against his instincts, against everything that makes him, ‘him’. He’s desperate to be a better person for me, but it’s not his natural path. And no matter how much it tortures him inside, he’s determined to continue living like this so we can be together.

  But I can’t let him. I need him to understand that I don’t want him to change. Good, bad or indifferent, I’ve fallen for Ryder as he is, for who he is … not what he’s trying to be. I refuse to let him continue struggling this way. I fell for him the moment I met him, I don’t want him to be anything but true to himself … true to me.

  I tilt my head to the side, looking up into his bright blue eyes and give him a small smile.

  “Please don’t change,” I say simply. “Can’t you see that from the moment I met you, I accepted who and what you are. I don’t want you to try and be anything else,” I say honestly.

  He breaks our eye contact looking at the ground instead.

  “The person you met, in the beginning, is only a glimpse of the person I once was. Some of the things I could tell you … some of the things I’ve done … you’d soon change your mind about me if you knew,” he states continuing to stare at the floor in front of him, his mind full of thoughts from the past.

  I can only imagine what he means. I’ve seen Ryder in action, and he was cold and ruthless with no remorse. If that was just a glimpse of what he was once like, Ryder in his prime must be devastatingly unstoppable. As images of the possible terror that Ryder caused, pass through my mind, the morbidly curious side of me can’t help but imagine how glorious he must be in his element.

  “Just be you, always you,” I find myself saying. The same words my brother told me before he left. It’s then that I realise how ironic it is that Ryder and I are both struggling with who we truly are. With who we’re destined to be. Maybe that’s why we have such a connection. Maybe together are who we’re meant to be – to just be us, always us.

  The tension that Ryder was carrying during his confession ebbs away while his shoulder relax. He lifts his head and pulls me in close. There’s no rushing, he’s soft and gentle in his touch. I stand tall on my tiptoes as I wrap my arms around his shoulders while he wraps his arms around my waist. Moving closer still, our lips meet and the kiss is deep and slow. We melt into each other, taking our time to savour the moment.

  Ryder slows down the kiss and is the first to pull away. My lips ache to feel them again.

  “You have no idea how much what you said means to me. To know you accept me for who I am … for what I am … I don’t know where you get that kind of strength from?”

  I smile up at him, and he returns the affection by kissing the top of my head.

  “Shall we carry on?” he asks.

  “Lead the way,” I reply.

  ~

  Holding hands we carry on walking up the path in comfortable silence. My mind drifts off to thoughts about the past and my time in Ravenhills. I could never have predicted that running away from a broken heart, would lead me to love. Searching inside myself I know that what I feel for Ryder is more than simple affection … I’m in love with him. Even if I’ve not admitted it out loud, there’s no denying it. My feelings for Ryder are so much stronger than anything I’ve ever felt before. And what I felt for Drew, pales in comparison. I thought my heart was broken by Drew, now I know it was only scuffed.

  We’re almost at the end of the path when I hear a loud cackle of laugher coming from in front of us … but no one’s there. We stop walking as five figures drop out of the sky. Three lands in front of us and I can sense two behind. They land on bended knee, with heads bowed low and one hand steadying them on the ground. They look like they’re about to be knighted, not like they’ve just dropped out of the sky.

  Ryder immediately goes on the defensive with his black wings spreading wide, eyes turning black and his fangs showing. He pulls me in close to his side trying to protect me. The sight of him is breathtaking, and if we were in any other situation I would admire him in all his vampire glory. I’m quickly brought back to the current situation when I hear Ryder shout out.

  “Liliana, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” he growls.

  “Now, now Ryder. Is that any way to speak to your future wife?” she mocks.

  Liliana is as scrawny and gaunt-looking as the first time I saw her. Her blonde hair is pulled back into a painfully tight looking bun and she has the craziest look on her face. All that mixed with the dark circles under her eyes, make her look haggard.

&nbs
p; There is a blonde-haired man stood at either side of Liliana, I’ve never seen them before. But all three of them have similar looks, so could be related. I know that there are two other people stood behind us, but Ryder is holding me so tight, that I’m unable to turn around.

  “I see you’ve brought two of your goons with you,” Ryder snarls. “I’m assuming goon number three is behind us?”

  “You know my brothers are never far away, Ryder,” she says while taking a step forward. Her brothers stay in place just behind her. Each one has a sick twisted smile plastered to their face and it makes me nervous for what they have planned. The air around us is thick with tension, this isn’t a social call. They know about Ryder and I, but how?

  “So, Willow’s the little tramp you’re leaving me for. I should have known this would happen that first night I saw you in the pub. The way you looked at her Ryder, it made me wanna puke!” she snarls.

  I hear Ryder’s wings flex at her name-calling. But she continues regardless.

  “Tut, tut Ryder. You knew the deal. You can kiss the truce goodbye. As soon as my parents find out what you’ve been up to; you, your family, your House and your little whore are as good as dead!” she shouts turning her attention towards me.

  “My brothers will each make sure you get what a whore deserves! But I must warn you, they’re not the gentlest of people I’m afraid. You’d think that after all these years they’d have learnt how to share ...” she sighs mockingly. “But no such luck Willow my dear. It’s gonna suck to be you!” she finishes cackling.

  Ryder stiffens at her words.

  “Watch yourself, Liliana,” he growls.

  “Me? Watch myself? I don’t need to do any such thing,” she cackles.”But I have been watching something ... someone!” She focuses on Ryder.

  “I’ve been watching your precious Willow. I saw her that first day she arrived in Ravenhills and knew she would be nothing but a pest. A pest that needed exterminating,” she continues as she begins to pace back and forth.

  “Yeah, I watched her. Watched her with her brother. Watched her in the garden that night,” she says before turning to me.