Undone
Page 4
Have faith...
I did. I would. In us.
Because us was the only thing that mattered.
Whatever drugs Felicity had given Luc had kept him asleep as she and Marco had cleaned his back, stitched his wounds, and covered the raw skin with bandages.
When they were done, Marco helped me move Luc into a better position on the bed. We were both worried about him waking again and becoming agitated, so I sat in the middle of the bed and leaned against the headboard with a pillow propped on my lap so Luc could lie between my legs with his cheek resting on my thigh. He didn’t wake when we repositioned him, but he startled a couple of times, so I ran my fingers through his hair and whispered sweet words to reassure him, and it helped.
Marco and Felicity had left me after Luc was situated. I wasn’t sure what they were doing but I suspected they were cleaning off Luc’s blood. Just the memory of all that blood...
I closed my eyes, leaned my head back against the wall as I sifted my fingers through Luc’s hair and willfully banished the image from my mind. I knew I’d never be able to, though. Seeing Luc strung up like that as they whipped him like an animal, hearing his agony intermixed with my sobs... It would all forever be engrained in my mind like a movie reel set on a loop. Along with every other wretched thing the monsters in his House had done to him in that room.
A soft knock sounded at the open door, and I opened my eyes and lifted my head from the wall as I glanced in that direction. Seconds later, Marco stepped into the room wearing a fresh white button-down rolled up to his elbows.
“Hey.” He nodded at Luc between my legs on the bed, his voice low. “How’s he doing?”
“Still sleeping,” I said softly.
“That’s good.” He crossed to me and held out a glass. “Here.”
I glanced at the two inches or so of golden liquid and wrapped my hand around the glass. “What is it?”
“Whisky. Well, I think you Americans call it Scotch whisky.”
I lifted the glass to my lips and took a large swallow, then coughed, wincing in the process so I wouldn’t wake Luc. “Oh my God, that’s strong.”
Marco raked a hand through his thick dark hair as he chuckled and leaned back against the small two-drawer, built-in dresser under the windows. Perching his weight on his hands at his sides, he said, “It’s good stuff. From Fee’s family’s distillery. Drink it all. You need it.”
I wasn’t in the mood to argue with him. I tipped my head back and swallowed the rest, this time managing only to wince as it went down.
Marco took the glass from me, then set it at his side as he went back to leaning against the dresser. “You did good, Natalie.”
I wasn’t sure what he meant. As I looked back down at Luc and toyed with his hair again, I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. “I don’t feel like I’ve done anything good.”
“I know,” he said softly, “but you did. You kept him calm. Fee and I wouldn’t have been able to get him stitched up without you.”
“The drugs would have kicked in eventually.”
“He would have fought them. He doesn’t like that drugged-out feeling. He doesn’t like how it takes away his control. You kept him centered. You’re the only person I’ve met who’s ever had that effect on him. That’s why it’s important you keep doing what you’re doing. This is just the beginning, you know. I wish I could say it was over, but I know Luc. And I’ve a feeling things are gonna get pretty rough before they can even start to get better.”
Agony clawed at my throat as I looked down at Luc. I knew what he was getting at. Not Luc’s physical pain, but the emotional turmoil he was going to have to deal with once he came out of this drugged haze.
I blinked back the misery and forced myself to meet Marco’s gaze. “Can’t you just take us away from here? Somewhere they can’t find us? Where Felicity took Dante?”
“I wish we could.”
“You can.”
“No. We can’t.”
His words were firm, but his tone was gentle, and even though all I wanted to do was rant and rage at the injustice, I knew it would do no good.
“They don’t care about Dante. But Luc...” He glanced at Luc sound asleep and immobile draped over my lap. “They’ll scour the ends of the earth for him. Fee talked to her father a few minutes ago. He negotiated with the Grand Duke for time to let Luc heal at Felicity’s family home in Scotland, but, Natalie, he will have to go back and face them eventually. There’s no getting around that.”
I couldn’t think about that now. I couldn’t think about anything but making sure Luc was okay. I looked down at him and brushed the hair back from his perfect face.
“I know about the deal you made,” Marco said softly.
My chest seized. Wide-eyed, I looked up at him as a new horror swept through me. “I—”
“It’s okay.” He held up a hand. “You did the right thing. The only thing you could. I didn’t bring it up to scare you. I mentioned it because you need to know that you have to follow through with that deal. Once Luc is healed, you have to get him back to Italy. He won’t want to go. It’ll be up to you to make it happen.”
The pain of a thousand daggers stabbed into me, lancing my chest. No, I knew I couldn’t defy the Grand Duke, but I couldn’t betray Luc either. And forcing him back to that...to those monsters who’d raped and tortured him...would be a betrayal in his eyes. He’d hate me forever if I made him do that.
“I...” Tears burned my eyes all over again. “I don’t know how to make that happen.”
“You’ll figure it out. When the time is right. Natalie, you know how important Luc is. Not to them, but to us. We need him. He’s the only one who can fix this fucked-up House. Gio won’t do it. Dante can’t do it. His uncles, anyone else waiting in the wings...they’re all worse than Antonio Salvatici. There’s no one else but Luc. That’s why it has to be him.”
Just the mention of that awful House sent bitter anger coursing through my veins. “He doesn’t want to have any part in that House.”
“He never has. But we don’t get to choose our destinies. Luc’s destiny is to set House Salvatici on the road to redemption, no matter what that entails. And yours is to keep him centered so he can do that.”
I blinked rapidly, willing back the tears as I studied Luc’s sleeping face, so angelic and at peace for the moment. Was that my destiny? To keep him centered so he could rule his twisted House? Originally, I’d thought my destiny was to find my friend Elena’s killer. That belief was what had brought me to Luc in the first place. But now... After everything that happened, I knew that had just been fate bringing us together.
My true destiny—my purpose—was simply to love Luc. To make sure he always knew he was not and never would be like the monsters who’d created him. To be his safe harbor whenever he was weary. To protect him, just as he’d protected me too many times to count.
“I-I don’t know how to make him do something he doesn’t want to do.”
“You’ll find a way. Luc loves you. He’d do anything for you. If you ask, he’ll even do the one thing he’s avoided his whole life.”
I looked up at Marco. “If I tell him abo—”
“You can’t tell him.”
“But—”
“If Luc finds out his father threatened you in any way, he’ll go after him. He won’t even hesitate. And you saw what happened when Dante did that. If Luc were to attack the Grand Duke, then all this will be for nothing. You can’t let that happen. You have to figure out a way to get Luc back to Italy on your own.”
My chest seized. I hated this. I hated every part of it. Sniffling, I said, “We promised each other we wouldn’t keep secrets.”
“This isn’t a secret. It’s the difference between life and death. For Luc. For thousands.”
Before I could respond, Marco pushed away from the dresser. “Try not to stress too much. We’ve got time. You don’t have to figure it all out today. I just wanted you to start thinking about it.”
>
With the glass in one hand, he stepped close and squeezed my shoulder in a way that was meant to be reassuring, but did nothing to ease my tension. “We’ll be landing in about twenty minutes. I’ll come back in just before touchdown to help hold him still so he doesn’t slide off the bed. For the next few days at least, the most important thing is making sure Luc’s body heals and that his head isn’t too screwed up from what happened. We’ll deal with all the rest later.”
I nodded, and quietly, Marco left the room. But alone with Luc, as I looked back down at his relaxed face and stroked his silky hair, I knew there was no way I could keep from stressing over the deal I’d made.
Those daggers stabbed deep all over again, twisting pain through the center of my chest. Luc might be able to get over what those Knights had done to him with that whip. He might be able to move past that woman raping him in front of his entire House. But if I forced him to go back to Italy, for whatever reason, he’d think I was choosing his family over him.
And that wouldn’t just be betrayal in his eyes. That would be a treachery that could very well shatter the bond we’d finally solidified between us.
Chapter Three
Luc
I hurt. Everywhere. And I wasn’t sure why.
Groaning against the bright light burning my eyeballs even when they were closed, I tried to roll away from the glow, only doing so caused every muscle in my body to rebel and a searing pain to shoot across my back.
“Luc?” Natalie’s sweet voice echoed in my ears as the mattress dipped and something soft brushed against my temple.
I breathed through the pain and shifted my head against the mattress so I could see her. Only I couldn’t see her. And I was lying on my stomach.
I hated sleeping on my stomach. I was a back sleeper. Always. I blinked several times to try to bring her into focus, but my vision was still blurry. Why the hell weren’t my eyes working?
“No, don’t try to get up,” Natalie said above me, still running her silky fingers over my temple and into my hair. And damn, I definitely liked that even if I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me.
“Ang…io...letto?” Shit. Did I just slur that?
“Yes,” she whispered near my ear. “It’s me, and I’m right here. Right where I’ve been for the last two days.” Her soft lips skimmed my temple, sending a burst of warmth straight into my chest. And oh, but I really liked that.
I closed my eyes and savored the silky-soft touch of her fingers in my hair, the calming scent of grapefruit and honey swirling around me, and her sweet heat rushing over my skin that was making me tingle everywhere.
I shifted my hand to reach out and pull her close, but before I could move my arm even a few inches, blinding pain shot down my spine all over again. A groan that didn’t sound like me echoed through the room. But I knew it had come from me. I’d felt it in my chest.
Twisting my face so it pressed against the mattress, I tried to push up on my hands, but that only sent pain spiraling through my back again, and I didn’t get very far before I collapsed against the bed with a groan.
“Luc.” Panic filled Natalie’s voice, sending the hair on my nape right to attention. “Oh shit. Please. Don’t move yet. Let me get Marco. I don’t want you to rip any of your stitches.” She leaned in close, and I caught a whiff of her intoxicating scent as she kissed my temple. “I’ll be right back. Stay still.”
She was there and gone before I could protest. Footsteps sounded. Then I heard her frantic voice—muffled, but definitely stressed—a distance away.
I wasn’t sure what was going on, but something was definitely wrong with me. Stitches? I had stitches? I couldn’t remember being hurt. I couldn’t remember anything. As I tried to figure out what had happened, all I came up with was a big blank nothing. My brain felt like pea soup. And every time I tried to move... Motherfucker, that hurt.
“Hey.” Footsteps sounded with the voice. The familiar voice. Marco’s voice. Hands closed over my arm on one side. “Easy now. Deep breaths, Luc.”
I ground my teeth together and managed to push myself up on my hands even though my back was on fire and I was sweating from just that little movement. Whispered voices echoed around me but I was too focused on just getting off my damn stomach to look to see who was in the room with us.
I managed to pull my legs under me and shift them to the side of the bed so I could sit. Marco held me at both arms as if he was afraid I might topple over. Twice I swayed, and even though I had no fucking clue why I was so weak, I was suddenly glad he was there.
“Hold on, Luc.” Felicity. That was Felicity’s voice in front of me. My stupid eyes still weren’t working. “We’ll get that taken care of for you.”
I had no idea what she was blabbering about. I was too focused on breathing, not falling over, and trying to figure out what the fuck was going on to care.
Something sharp stabbed into my arm.
“Che...cazzo.” I jerked.
“It’s to help the pain,” Felicity said. “Stop being a baby.”
She’d stuck me with some kind of needle. I wasn’t so out of it I couldn’t tell that. The sting lasted for only a second, then I felt her smooth a bandage over the spot. “There. That’ll take the edge off.”
The drug was already working. It was dulling that burn in my back to something I could manage. Normally, I didn’t like drugs, but anything was better than that burn. And it was helping enough so at least I didn’t want to crawl out of my own skin.
“I’m...having trouble...seeing,” I rasped. Holy hell, that did not sound like me. Why the fuck was my voice so gravelly?
“It’s from being out of it for several days,” Felicity said. “It’ll clear. Give it time.”
Several days? My mind spun again but I still couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on. “Where’s...Natalie?”
“I’m right here.” I felt her hand on my arm, but more than that, I heard her voice right next to me, and the soft sound was enough to ease the stress that had been building inside me from the moment she’d left to find Marco. “I’m not going anywhere.” Her fingers drifted down to where my hand rested against my thigh and closed around my own.
I was able to draw a full breath just knowing she was close. But why was I so stressed about keeping her near me? Why was I suddenly afraid to let her out of my sight—okay, vicinity—for even a second? We were safe on Marco’s property. My House couldn’t get to her. And they’d approved our marriage, hadn’t they?
My mind spun. Yeah, they had. I’d met with my father. I’d talked to him abo—
“Do you feel like eating?” Felicity asked, her voice interrupting my fragmented thoughts. “Maybe some gelatin? Or juice? We could start with juice.”
Was I hungry? I wasn’t sure. One thing I did know was that my bladder was about to explode. “I...I need a bathroom first.”
“I know you’re gonna hate this.” Marco helped me to my feet. “But you’re not steady on these legs yet, so you’re having company in the bathroom whether you like it or not.”
I swayed and looked to my left where he had a death grip on my arm, making sure I didn’t go down. Which I was suddenly thankful for because my legs felt like that gelatin Felicity wanted to feed me. “Pervert. You just...want to look at...my junk.”
Marco snorted. “I don’t need to look. I already know it’s way smaller than mine.” He held up his pinky finger—blurry but there. “Piccolissimo.”
I couldn’t help myself. I laughed. And all that did was send a wave of fresh pain across my back again. “Vaffanculo,” I muttered to Marco, then with a cough, I said, “Where’s Natalie?”
“I’m right here.”
Her fingers closed over my other arm, helping me as I moved across the room. And damn, but her hands felt good on any part of me. Just knowing she was close felt good.
“You can tell me to fuck off after I help you do your business,” Marco said on my other side. “This isn’t fun for either one of us, y
ou know. Natalie, get the bathroom door, would you?”
I didn’t want her to let go of me, even for a second, but I didn’t want to look like a total pansy, either. And, Mother of God, where the fuck was this bathroom? Siberia? It was taking us a long freaking time to get there. I was seriously sweating now.
As Marco helped me into the bathroom, I groaned even though I tried like hell not to. At our backs, Natalie said, “Are you sure you don’t need me?”
I did need her. Always. Everywhere. And I’d much rather have her in here with me than Marco. But before I could make the words form in my mouth, Marco said, “I got this. He’s fine.”
The door snapped closed, then Marco reached for me again. “Toilet’s over here.”
Now I felt like an invalid. I shook off his hand when he positioned me in front of the bowl. “I can do this part...alone.”
“Are you sure? You’re still wobbly on those legs.”
I rested a hand against the wall to show him I was stable, then flashed him the finger. “Back off already, pervert.”
Marco chuckled but did as I said. When I was done, I flushed the toilet and hobbled toward the sink, thankful the bathroom wasn’t too big and that I could use the chair-rail molding as a guide. But shit, I didn’t remember this room in Marco’s house at all. The walls were an ugly lime green and the sink and moldings and everything else were white and too damn dainty for his tastes.
I braced my hips against the counter and flipped on the water. As I washed my hands under the warm stream, I glanced up and did a double take at the fuzzy reflection staring back at me.
Holy hell. I looked like I’d been through a bender. My eyes were bloodshot, my cheeks pale and sunken in, and my hair was standing out all over my head. Actually, I looked like I’d been through a bender in hell. My gaze dropped to my chest—my bare chest—then slid lower to the gray sweatpants I knew were not mine hanging off my hips.
“Here.” Marco handed me a towel.
I flipped off the water, trying to figure out what had happened to me, and reached for the towel. Had I gotten shit-faced drunk and blacked out? I hadn’t done that since I was a teenager. I ran my tongue over my teeth and grimaced. It was possible. My mouth tasted like shit.