Silver Bullet

by RJ Blain

  The misery in my two-legger’s stench was so strong I sneezed.

  “If only she needed me half as much.”

  “And you called her dense. You’re an idiot, Elliot. Of course she needs you as much as you need her. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t be so tormented about the choices she’s made. She wants you. She just doesn’t know how to get you without breaking her word to another man.”

  “I can’t even fault her for that. That’s the whole problem. I can’t even blame her for keeping her promise. I’d do the same fucking thing. She drives me crazy, Richard,” my two-legger muttered.

  “Of course she does. You love her.”

  The sigh that slipped out of my two-legger was so sad it hurt me to hear it. I huffed, crawling out from under the blanket to perch on the basket’s edge. When the two-leggers ignored me, I chittered and clicked my tongue.

  Instead of capturing my two-legger’s attention, Richard turned to me. Before I could do more than squeak my alarm, he scooped me up. I struggled in his hold, squealing when I couldn’t free myself. “Hey, Elliot?”

  “Why are you torturing my squirrel? Put her down before she bites you.”

  “Is squirrel stew is out of the question?”

  Fury burned away the scent of my two-legger’s misery. He surged to his feet, balling his hands into fists. “Richard!”

  Something wet splashed onto my nose. Startled, I looked up.

  A wall of water cascaded from the ceiling and flooded the kitchen.

  Chapter Four

  Water soaked through my fur and froze me. Without Richard’s grip on me, the torrent would’ve swept me away. The force of the cascade knocked both two-leggers over, and Richard hit the tiles hard, cradling me to his chest.

  My basket floated away.

  The lights flickered before my two-legger’s nest went dark.

  Spitting curses, Richard surged to his feet, dumped me on the water-slicked counter, and reached down to grab my two-legger’s arm. He hung limp in Richard’s grip. “Fucking witch!”

  With a grunt, Richard lifted my two-legger and dumped him on the counter beside me. Within moments, he dug a phone out of his pocket, cursing another storm. “It’s Richard Murphy. I need a team to the Shadow Pope’s residence. He just manifested, and there’s at least two feet of water in his kitchen.”

  Another cascade of water gushed from the ceiling. I squealed and grabbed hold of my two-legger’s bathrobe, but the current was so strong it swept me off the counter. I splashed to the floor.

  Richard snagged me by my tail and lifted me out of the water. “Make that three feet. I’m also going to need a fire witch, and if there happens to be a sanctioned sorcerer in town, I could use one of those, too.”

  When it started to rain, Richard sighed. “And now it’s raining. How do you turn off a water witch? No. He dropped like a rock. I fished him out of the water so he wouldn’t drown. Fuck, this is fucking cold!”

  I twisted and pawed at Richard’s hand, scrambling to find purchase so he’d stop pulling my tail. He adjusted his hold on me, and after a moment, set me on his shoulder. “Also, I need someone to bring a heated blanket for a squirrel and some towels. No, I have no idea if he flooded the whole house. Better put in an order for new phones for the both of us. I’m shocked mine still works. Thanks.” Richard hung up and sighed.

  I shuddered, scooting closer to Richard’s neck. While he wasn’t my two-legger, he was warm.

  “Sorry. I wanted to test his reaction. It worked far better than I expected. I’ll take care of him.” Richard reached up and scratched under my chin. “You stay there and hold on tight in case he manifests again.”

  I had no idea what Richard was talking about, but since I didn’t want to end up in the swirling water rushing around the two-legger’s legs, I grasped his shirt as tight as I could with all four of my paws.

  After a final stroke, Richard waded to my two-legger’s side and gently slapped his cheeks. “Elliot, you really are an idiot. I wasn’t going to eat your squirrel.”

  My two-legger groaned, but his eyes remained closed.

  “If you don’t want to go to the hospital, you need to pull yourself together. You have about five minutes before the cavalry arrives, eh?”

  I worried when my two-legger answered with another intelligible groan. Sighing, Richard kept patting my two-legger’s cheeks until he roused enough to crack open an eye. “Wakey, wakey.”

  “Richard?”

  “You flooded your house, and since I didn’t want you to drown, I put you on your counter. I wasn’t going to eat your squirrel. Look, she’s right here on my shoulder.” Richard reached up and pet me, and because I wanted to reassure my two-legger, I nuzzled Richard’s hand. “See?”

  My two-legger blinked. “I did what?”

  Richard pointed at the water. “You flooded your house. You made it rain in here, too. If that wasn’t bad enough, you tried to drown yourself. At least my phone worked long enough to call headquarters and let them know. They should—”

  A bang made Richard whirl around so fast I lost my hold and splashed into the water. I swam for his leg, scratching at his pants. The current caught hold of me, and I squealed when it swept me away. Richard bent over and picked me up. “Your squirrel is determined to drown herself. Here, hold her while I wade to the door.”

  My two-legger lurched upright, shaking his head with a glazed look in his eyes. Richard handed me over before splashing through the water. “Keep your pants on, I’m coming. Don’t knock the damned man’s door down. His house is damaged enough.”

  I climbed onto my two-legger’s shoulder and grabbed his robe so I wouldn’t fall.

  Startled cries heralded a drop in the water level. Richard’s deep, rumbling laugh boomed. “I told you he flooded his house.” Several moments later, Richard reappeared with several more two-leggers in his wake. “Give me one of the towels so I can get his squirrel dried off before she freezes to death.”

  I dove into my two-legger’s robe so Richard wouldn’t catch me. My two-legger yelped, grabbing hold of me before I could wiggle out of his reach. I kicked my paws, squealing my protest.

  “Take care of him,” Richard ordered before wrapping me in a towel. “I’ll go figure out where all that water came from. When the sorcerer gets here, let me know.”

  Richard opened the door leading to the pool, and a wave of water rushed out of my two-legger’s nest. Sighing he shook his head. While snow still fell, the evidence of the snowstorm no longer touched my two-legger’s yard.

  His pool was also empty.

  “Well. That explains why it was so cold. Did he really have to take the snow, too? I suspected he’d start manifesting one of these days, but did he have to be so bloody dramatic about it? I swear, he’s worse than a newly mated Fenerec male.” Shaking his head, Richard retreated back into the nest and waited for most of the water to flow out the door before closing it.

  “Where’s my squirrel?” my two-legger demanded, storming out of the kitchen.

  “She’s right here,” Richard said, holding me up. “Was just getting her dried off. I’d say keep your pants on, but you’re not wearing any.”

  “Richard.”

  I hadn’t known two-leggers could growl.

  “You haven’t figured it out, have you?”

  “Figured what out?”

  Richard chuckled, cradling me and my towel cocoon to his chest. “Have you had trouble sleeping lately?”

  “You know I have. What does that have to do with my squirrel?”

  “You slept so soundly this morning I had to wake you up several hours after you would’ve been at work pestering people.”

  My two-legger scowled and toweled his hair. “And?”

  “You’re really attached to a squirrel you pulled out of your pool yesterday.”

  “So? She’s cute. Can’t a man like a cute squirrel? She’s better behaved than you are.”

  “While you’re a sucker for strays, Mr. Anderson, you don’t usu
ally bring them into your house and cuddle with them.”

  “There was a fucking blizzard going on out there. I wasn’t going to ask someone to come out in a blizzard to fetch my squirrel.”

  “There’s barely six inches on the ground, Elliot.”

  “Blizzard.”

  Richard sighed. “Our differences of opinion regarding snowfall accumulation aside, don’t you think you’re being a little possessive over a squirrel?”

  I squeaked my protest. If my two-legger stayed possessive, he wouldn’t want to get rid of me.

  “You were going to eat her!”

  “I wasn’t. I just wanted to see your reaction. Go see if any of your clothes are dry. You all right?”

  “I feel like my head is going to split in half.”

  “And your minions actually let you out of their sight?”

  “I told them I was going to get changed.”

  “What are they doing?”

  “Trying to figure out where the water came from.”

  “Your pool. It looks like you yanked all the snow off your yard, too.”

  “My pool?” my two-legger choked out.

  “It’s empty.”

  “My pool’s empty?”

  “I hope your pump shut itself off, else it’s fried.”

  “My lines!” my two-legger wailed.

  “Elliot, you flooded your entire house. Why are you worried about your pool?”

  My two-legger blinked, turned in a slow circle, and his scent changed, although I couldn’t identify the cause of it. Richard, however, sucked in a breath and hurried to my two-legger’s side, taking hold of his elbow. “Deep breaths, Elliot. It can be fixed. I’ll take care of it. Get dressed, and I’ll drive you to my hotel. You can share my room with me while your house is being fixed.”

  While unsteady on his feet, my two-legger made it to where he slept with a little help from Richard. Richard stood vigil while my two-legger rummaged through his dresser for dry clothing.

  “Did the water get into your clothes?”

  “The bottom two drawers. Hopefully the closet door spared my suits.” Wearing nothing but a pair of briefs, Elliot opened the door to what I assumed was his closet. “They’re dry.”

  “Good. Grab a couple. I’ll ask one of the Inquisitors to bring more along. Let’s get out of the wet and cold before you catch your death.”

  My two-legger jerked his head in a nod. I squirmed in my towel prison, and Richard rubbed the top of my head. “Easy, girl. He’ll be fine.”

  “Mr. Murphy?” someone asked from behind us. I considered the two-legger’s voice and decided she was a female.

  Richard turned. “Yes?”

  “The sorcerer you asked for is here.”

  “Good. Send him over along with his guard.”

  The female backed out of the doorway.

  “You asked for a sorcerer?” I flinched at the sharp edge of anger in my two-legger’s scent. “Why?”

  “Elliot.” Richard unwrapped me from the towel and held me up. “While there are red squirrels in America, and while there are black squirrels in America, there are no red squirrels with black paws in America. You, who hasn’t been able to sleep for three weeks because your mate is missing, slept so soundly last night you made your detail panic when you didn’t answer your phone or call the office to make a nuisance of yourself. All it took to unhinge you was the threat of hurting your squirrel. You have a brain. Use it.”

  “I don’t get it.”

  Richard groaned and thrust me at my two-legger. “Hold her and be quiet, Elliot. And you accuse your mate of being dense.”

  My two-legger blinked, shifted his suits to one arm, and took hold of me, setting me on his shoulder. I nestled beside his neck, licked my paws, and went to work trying to restore my fur to order. “Just tell me, Richard.”

  “Mr. Murphy? You asked for me?” An old two-legger limped into the room, leaning on a twisted stick. “How may I serve?”

  Richard pointed at me. “What do you see?”

  The old two-legger drew close, and the pervasive stench of decay filled my nose. I chittered, bristling at the male’s approach. “I see she doesn’t like me.”

  “It’s the smell.”

  “You don’t have to be rude about it.”

  “Sensitive nose, Alfred. I smelled you the instant you stepped into the house.”

  My two-legger cleared his throat. “Richard, I’m about ten seconds from losing my temper with you.”

  Richard leaned to the old two-legger and whispered something in his ear.

  The old one laughed. “Yes. Confirmed. Is that all you needed me for?”

  “For the moment. I might need you later,” Richard replied. “Thank you.”

  “Richard,” my two-legger growled. The sorcerer chuckled and hobbled out of the room. “What are you doing?”

  “If you don’t figure it out by the time we get to the hotel, I’ll tell you. Let me talk to your Inquisitors about what to do if you start manifesting again. I’d rather not flood the hotel. It’s going to be expensive enough repairing your house. And no, don’t feed me any of your shit about fixing it yourself. You’re my pack and my responsibility. I goaded you into doing it. But hey, think about it this way. The Archeons already voted for you to remain the Shadow Pope despite a bad case of witchcraft.”

  Richard pivoted and walked away, leaving my two-legger spluttering in his wake. “Richard? Richard! Don’t you walk away from me, you insufferable Alpha!”

  Instead of being properly cowed by my two-legger’s fury, Richard laughed.

  A sports car was parked outside of my two-legger’s house, a silver one that made my two-legger laugh when he saw it. “What is it with you? Why must you insist on bringing a damned Porsche where there’s snow?”

  “It’s Nicole’s.”

  “She’s going to skin you for your pelt you when she finds out you stole her car.”

  “I’m strangely okay with that.”

  My two-legger sighed, carried me to the passenger side of the car, and slipped inside while Richard loaded the trunk. Curling on my two-legger’s lap, I rubbed my paws over my fur in a feeble attempt to smooth my coat.

  I failed miserably.

  Richard got behind the wheel and started the engine. His request for a heater was fulfilled by an electric blanket and a car adapter, which he plugged in. The fact I recognized everything astonished me.

  Why couldn’t I remember anything important?

  My two-legger took the electric blanket, wrapped me in it, and turned it on. “Who thought to bring this?”

  “I asked for it. That water was cold enough to make me feel like an ice cube, so I figured she’d need it. Heated seats for you, blanket for her. Just make sure she doesn’t roast. If it gets too hot, shove her in your shirt or something.”

  “I’ll be careful. Thanks.”

  “No problem. We’re staying at a hotel downtown, so it’s a bit of a drive. I was going to stay at a place closer, but as soon as I touched down at your damned airfield, I had a swarm of frantic, paranoid bees buzzing around. It was easier to give them their way and keep the panic to a minimum. Someone will bring replacement phones to the hotel, and I’m pretty sure we’re going to have two or three tails to make sure we get there in one piece. I had a tail coming here, but they left after I arrived.”

  “After what happened, they’re not taking any chances.”

  “I noticed. That’s going to make my plan a bit difficult.”

  “What plan?”

  Richard chuckled and drove away from my two-legger’s home. “The one where we backtrack the entire operation, set up a full timeline, and figure out what happened. Have you been to the site yet?”

  “Not personally.”

  “After you’ve gotten some rest, we’re going on a field trip. Make it happen, Your Eminence.”

  “Richard, I flooded my house.”

  “Trust me, I noticed. I’m not surprised.”

  “You’re not surpr
ised? How can you not be surprised?”

  “Elliot, your brother is likely one of the strongest earth witches alive. I don’t know of a single other earth witch capable of burning down an entire city by cracking open the ground and summoning a volcano.”

  “He didn’t burn down an entire city.”

  Richard snorted. “No, he just turned most of a mountain into a lava field and blanketed the entire area in ash. My point stands: he made a volcano. In his words, the lava followed him around like a puppy, Elliot. I’m not the only one who’s been making bets on when you began manifesting. Considering you fainted for all of five minutes and otherwise seem fine, you’ve been using witchcraft a long time—likely on your brother, suppressing his witchcraft. Anyone with half a brain knows you’re damned protective of Dante. Do you know what the Inquisitor I called said? She said, and I quote, ‘About time.’ It wouldn’t surprise me if there’s a witch waiting at the hotel to give you your first witchcraft lesson so you won’t flood buildings when you’re upset or annoyed. Do us all a favor: don’t get upset or annoyed until you figure it out.”

  “This is ridiculous.”

  “Elliot, you’ve been primed to blow for weeks. I’m genuinely amazed it took you so long to manifest. I’m even more amazed it took the uppers in the Inquisition so long to change the rules about who can be the Shadow Pope.”

  “It was the first time I’ve called the Archeons together in three months,” my two-legger mumbled.

  “That explains it. How are you feeling?”

  “My head is going to split in half.”

  “Be glad you’re not a Fenerec. When we get to the hotel, I’ll get someone to bring you some painkillers. After a long soak in a tub and something to eat, you’ll be a brand-new man.”

  “I think I’ve had enough water for one day.”

  “If you argue, I won’t tell you something really good.”

  My two-legger growled. “Richard.”

  “Relax. You really don’t want to flood my mate’s car and get your squirrel wet and cold again. She’s been through enough.”

  “Why did you call in a sorcerer, anyway?”

  “You’ll see.”