His brows pulled together. “Meeting you for sex?”
Heat shot up my neck, and then I was gripping his shirt and pushing him against the wall. His mouth popped open, and his eyes dropped to my mouth. Fuck he was so close.
I wanted him closer.
“You can’t just meet strangers for sex, Cason,” I growled. “Thank god it was me and not some other man. Who knows what would’ve happened to you otherwise?”
“I don’t need a lecture.” He shoved against my chest with no force. Like he didn’t actually want me to move. “And in case you forgot, you were also meeting someone. So don’t act all high-and-mighty. If it was some other eighteen-year-old who showed up at your door, you’d be balls-deep in him by now.”
My hands dropped from his shirt, and I stepped backward. What was wrong with me? I had no right to be angry at him.
“It’s just not safe,” I said, putting even more space between us. Mainly because I kept looking at his lips.
“Have you seen me?” Cason held out his arms, drawing my eyes to his perfectly rounded biceps and his toned upper body. “I can take care of myself.”
Had he already hooked up with men from the app? He’d been quick to suggest meeting when we’d messaged, as if he’d done it before. He’d also mentioned “experimenting” with his sexuality.
My hands turned to fists, and the blood sounded loud in my ears.
“Are you mad?” Cason asked, his tone lifting with his brows.
I was many things—angry and worried.
Jealous.
“Only because you’re not being careful,” I answered, hoping he wouldn’t dig deeper into it. “Don’t meet up with strange men you meet online. Date like a normal teen and go out with boys your own age.”
A blank stare. And then his lips twitched. “You’re such a dad.”
I suppressed a groan. The last thing I wanted was for Cason to think of me like that. But it was for the best if he did. Made things less complicated.
“Just do me a favor and don’t be so reckless next time,” I said, unsure why the thought of him with another guy bothered me so much.
Cason pushed away from the wall and neared me. When I stepped back, he followed. His gaze lowered to my mouth before slowly lifting again.
“Question, Mr. Cross.” He smoothed a hand up my chest and tilted his head up, his lids heavy. “If you didn’t know me until now, if this really had been a hookup with a complete stranger… would you have opened that door, pulled me inside, and fucked me? You agreed to meet, so you must’ve liked something about my body.”
Oh, there was a lot I liked.
“The point is moot,” I answered, stepping aside. Escaping his barrier of body heat that had my own heating in response. “I do know you.”
“But am I your type?” Cason pressed.
“We shouldn’t even be discussing this.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re just a kid.”
He smiled. “You didn’t seem to mind earlier when I was just SportsGuy.”
“Drop it,” I said, striding across the room to grab my wallet and keys from the dresser. I needed to leave before I did something I’d regret.
A hand came around my bicep and spun me around. “What if I don’t want to drop it?”
“Cason. Enough.” I looked into his hungry eyes, seeing myself mirrored in them. “We’re not doing this.”
Please stop. My self-control was slipping. I wanted him too much.
“Aren’t you going to ask me?” He backed me up against the dresser.
“Ask you what?” I swallowed the tightness in my throat.
“If you’re my type?” Cason slid his hand to my waist, his fingers slipping beneath the hem of my shirt. “Because you are, Emery. When I saw that profile, I thought of you which is why I slid into your DM. I’ve wanted your hands on me for so long.”
Was he trying to seduce me? Because goddammit it was working.
The sizzling connection between us had my head spinning. Fire blazed in my veins as our gazes locked. Cason pressed himself closer, running his hands up under my shirt. His lips parted and his quickening breaths feathered across my mouth.
“W-we…” I stared at his lips. “We shouldn’t.”
His fingers trailed up my stomach. “Then tell me to leave.”
I grabbed his face and kissed him instead.
A surprised grunt left him, turning into a moan as his mouth pressed firmer to mine. My fingers slid through his light brown hair, and his dug into my sides. His taste was better than I imagined. The feel of him was too.
I backed him up toward the bed, our lips still locked. I couldn’t get enough of Cason. Of his taste, of the sounds rumbling in his chest. Once on the bed, I pressed him into the mattress with my weight. His hands moved to my ass and squeezed, and I broke from his mouth to kiss down his neck.
And then sense slammed into me.
Cason was only eighteen. Even worse, he was Ryan’s best friend. Making out with him, grinding against his hard body, was inappropriate.
“What’s wrong?” Cason asked with a pant as I shot off him.
“I have to go,” I said in a rush, snatching my keys off the dresser and slipping my wallet into my back pocket.
“Now?” Cason got off the bed and followed me to the door. I grabbed the handle, and he slammed his hand against the door. “Talk to me.”
I spun on my heels and looked at him. “This can’t happen. We can’t.”
“Because of Ryan?”
“He’s part of it, yes.” My voice shook as I worked on calming the intense lust coursing through me. I fought the urge to claim his lips again. “He already resents me, Cason. How do you think he’ll react when he learns I’m fucking his best friend?”
His tongue briefly swept across his bottom lip, making it even harder not to push him against the wall and bite that lip. “He doesn’t have to know.”
“You’re okay with keeping secrets from him?”
Pain flashed in his eyes. “Not really. I tell him everything.”
“I don’t want to put you in a position where you have to lie to him,” I said, angry at myself for even letting it get that far. “Let’s forget this night ever happened.”
“What if I don’t want to forget?” Cason’s hand remained on the door, and he stepped closer, pushing me against it. “What if…” His eyes dropped to my mouth. “What if I really like kissing you and wanna do it again?”
God, I really liked kissing him too. It’d been hard to stop.
“We can’t,” I told him again. Maybe if I said it enough I’d believe it.
Cason pressed his head to mine and stayed that way a moment. Then, he took a step back, then another, his eyes not leaving my face. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Look, I’m not gonna chase you like some pitiful puppy. I want you. But you don’t want me. I get it. Besides, arguing with a lawyer is pretty dumb.”
I grinned despite the heaviness in my chest. “Believe me, want has nothing to do with it. I was more than ready to fuck you into that mattress a few minutes ago. But I—”
“Can’t,” he said. “I know.”
“The room is paid for tonight.” I grabbed the handle again but didn’t take my gaze off him just yet. “Stay the night. Someone should get some use out of that bed.”
“I know a good way to make good use of it.”
His words created images of us naked and wrapped in the sheets, our chests sliding together as our lips met. He would sigh as I nibbled his neck, and he’d fist the sheet when I kissed down his body and took him into my mouth.
It was only a fantasy. As much as I wanted Cason, it wasn’t right for me to have him.
“Good night, Cason.” I opened the door and walked into the hall.
My cock ached and my breathing still hadn’t slowed by much, neither helped by the visual of us naked in bed before I’d left. I forced my feet to move as the door shut behind me, heavy and echoing in the
quiet hallway.
Every step away from Cason was one in the right direction.
So why was it so damn difficult?
I drove home and stripped out of my clothes on the way to my room. I tossed them in the hamper and collapsed in bed, pressing my face into my pillow. My heart was still racing.
“I’ve wanted your hands on me for so long.”
I turned my head on the pillow and stared at my hand, remembering the warmth of Cason’s skin beneath my fingertips. Remembering the softness of his hair as my fingers slid through the strands. More than anything, I remembered the slight huskiness of his voice as he’d moaned against my mouth.
My attraction for him would fade.
It had to.
Chapter 7
Cason
Sitting in the hotel room, on the bed Emery had just been making out with me on, I tried to make sense of what just happened. My brain rattled, like an old engine about to explode.
Any doubt about being gay was gone.
Over the years, I had kissed a few random girls at Trev’s parties, Lindsey, and basically every cheerleader that had cheered me on in football. I had felt nothing with any of them. Well, other than the urge to get as far away as possible. I’d kissed them because that’s what had been expected of me. But it wasn’t normal to be bored while kissing someone, right?
I definitely hadn’t been bored tonight.
Kissing Emery had been like a lit match dropped on a line of oil. The flame hit and set the whole fucking thing ablaze. I’d never felt anything like it. I wanted more. As much as he’d give me.
I touched my lips at the memory of his and smiled. His kisses had been hard, dominating. When he’d pushed me on the bed and got on top of me, I was at his mercy and fucking loved it. I might not have been experienced with sex, but I knew what I liked—and having Emery fuck me into next week was exactly what I’d like.
Emery wanted me too. But it was complicated.
My phone buzzed in my back pocket. After fishing it out, I clicked the notification. A text from the complication.
Ryan: Hey, man. Hope u aren’t pissed about 2nite.
Me: No prob. I’m not mad. How was the show?
Ryan told me he and Lexi had a lot of fun, and they were able to go backstage after the concert and meet the band. He sent me pictures of him with the members, then one with him and Lexi squeezed between the lead singer and the drummer.
Me: Glad you had a great night.
Ryan: Thx. U do anything fun?
Emery’s hands and lips all over me had certainly been fun.
Me: No. Just stayed home.
The first lie. It amazed me at how easy it was too.
The next morning, I woke up in the king-sized bed, momentarily confused. When the previous night flooded back to me—Emery’s blue eyes raking over my body, his hands grazing my sides, and his erection grinding against mine as I had the hottest kiss of my life—I slid a hand under the sheet and grabbed my throbbing dick.
A morning jerk-off session wouldn’t hurt anyone.
Remembering the condoms and lube Emery had stashed in the bedside table, I opened the drawer and took them out. Jackpot. I dripped some lube in a condom and put it on before starting a slow stroke with my hand. I closed my eyes and dropped my head on the pillow, stretching out my legs.
I pictured Emery the whole time, imagining his hands on me. A sudden need came over me then, and I drizzled lube on my free hand before shoving it behind me. I’d never put anything up there before, but I couldn’t fight the urge. With one hand still working the lubed condom up and down my shaft, I slipped the tip of my middle finger into my ass.
I gasped at the sting of it but pushed it in a little deeper. I was already close, the room filled with the sound of the slick condom and my panting breaths.
“Fuuuck.” I fingered my ass harder and jerked myself faster.
When I came, I pressed my lips together to keep from crying out. Afterward, I relaxed against the bed, my chest and hairline damp with sweat.
Two things were decided that morning. One, I kind of liked stuff up my ass and wanted to explore it further. And two, I wouldn’t give up on Emery. I refused to chase someone who wasn’t interested, but I knew he wanted me too. That had been evident in the look in his eyes and how he’d shoved me onto the bed and kissed me.
I showered and changed back into my clothes from the night before since I hadn’t brought anything else. Before I left the room, I grabbed a sack from the bathroom and shoved the lube and condoms inside it. Pretty sure the cleaning people would’ve gotten a nice laugh out of it if I’d left them there, though Emery probably would’ve been humiliated. I then snatched the room keys off the dresser and took them with me down to the lobby.
The woman behind the desk looked up as I approached, and I slid the cards across the counter.
“Thank you,” she said, looking them over before putting them beside her. “Have a nice day.”
“You too.”
Humid air clung to my skin as soon as I was outside. My hair was still damp from the shower, so at least it wasn’t chilly. Small blessings. Soon, spring would turn to summer. I couldn’t wait. I loved hot summer days. Ryan and I would go to the lake with our buddies and chill, swimming and riding in Brad’s boat.
Would it be different this summer?
I got a feeling things were about to change, that this might be our last summer before life got in the way and took us on separate paths. Ryan would be going to a college about an hour away while I stayed here. He was dating someone new, and I was… well, I was discovering who I really was. Big changes were on the horizon.
Was I ready?
Without a cloud in the sky, the sun was blinding, and I squinted against it as I headed toward my car. Once inside, I started the engine and rolled down the windows. Emery’s words echoed in my head.
“He doesn’t approve,” he’d said about Ryan.
As I drove home, I thought about how Ryan had been my first true friend. He’d gotten me into sports, and I had helped him with his studies. We had balanced each other. He knew about my home life and had let me stay at his mom’s house for days at a time when it got really bad. There was no one I trusted more at my back than him. But if he really was homophobic or whatever, would he forget how close we were and cast me aside if I told him the truth?
I don’t wanna chance it.
I wasn’t ready to lose my best friend.
***
“Die, motherfuckers!” Ryan speedily tapped the trigger on the Xbox controller, shooting the swarm of aliens that had run out at us from a run-down building on post-apocalyptic Earth.
Ryan had invited me over that afternoon to play a new game he’d bought, and the whole time I’d been on my way over, I had dreaded being around him, as if he’d be able to see the truth just by looking at me. Guilt lay beneath the anxiety. Keeping the truth from Ryan wasn’t any better than lying to him.
“Have you talked to your dad lately?” The question slipped out before I could stop it.
“Why would I talk to him?” Ryan kept his eyes on the game, but his mood had shifted from playful to serious.
“I don’t know.”
“He’s workin’ on some big case right now,” Ryan said. “Even if I wanted to talk to him, I bet he wouldn’t have the time. Work always comes first in his book.”
“Is that why you don’t get along with him?”
Emery had told me the real reason Ryan held an attitude toward him, but I wanted Ryan to say it.
“What’s with the twenty questions, Cas? We’ve had this stupid conversation before.”
“Sorry.”
He went back to playing the game, cursing at aliens.
My phone lit up beside me on the floor, and my heart jumped into my throat. It was only a text reminding me I had a dental cleaning tomorrow. My heart settled back in place. I was dumb for thinking it might’ve been Emery aka Liam.
It’d been two days since Emery and I almost fuc
ked in the hotel room. I’d thought of messaging him a million times on the app, but I’d chickened out, not sure what to say. Other guys had messaged me, and I’d debated on hooking up with one of them like I’d originally intended. But an idea had struck—a stupid fucking idea but one I couldn’t get out of my head.
I wanted to lose my virginity to Emery. No one else even came close to him.
“Dude, you listening?”
“Huh?”
Ryan hit me over the head with a Twizzler. “I asked if you had to work today ’cause I want you to meet Lexi.”
“I have met her. At the party.”
“Okay, the night I fucked her while slobbering drunk and having her get mad at me isn’t exactly the night I’d like to remember.”
“She got mad?” I asked, grinning.
Ryan blushed. “Let’s just say I didn’t stay in port long enough for all members to get off.”
I choked out a laugh, earning me another hit over the head with the candy. “She agreed to see you again. So it must not have been that bad.”
“I’ve made up for it since then,” Ryan said with a sly smile.
I envied him in that moment. He could talk about who he liked with such freedom and didn’t have to think twice about it. Even if Emery wasn’t his dad, I’d still hesitate in talking to Ryan about him. It sucked because I needed to talk about it. Keeping it all inside my head with no outlet was a struggle.
Fear of rejection held me back.
An hour later, we left his house to meet Lexi. She had just finished her shift in the food court at the mall—she worked at the smoothie place. Seeing Ryan, she beamed with a huge smile and ran toward him. God, it was like a scene out of a movie. She fell into his arms, and he kissed her lightly on the lips.
“Lex, this is Cas,” Ryan said, nodding toward me, his arms around her tiny waist.
“Hey,” Lexi said. Her dark brown ponytail bobbed as she stepped out of Ryan’s arms and pulled a phone from her purse. She held it up and took a selfie of them cheek to cheek before saying, “Have to post that my man surprised me after work.”
His Temptation Page 6
