“You don’t think it’s dumb?” He lifted the ice chest off the counter.
“Definitely not.” I grabbed the bag of chips and paper plates and followed him into the garage. “I can’t remember the last time I did something outdoors. I’m excited.”
“Good.” Emery loaded the ice chest in the trunk and glanced up at me. Something seemed different about him. He was dressed in a T-shirt and athletic shorts instead of the more formal shit he normally wore. His hair fell free, lacking the product he used to tame it.
But the biggest change was his carefree smile.
He looks happy.
Once he got into the car, I opened the passenger-side door and carefully got in. I didn’t want to ruin the nice seats or anything. He smirked before starting the engine. It fucking purred.
“Yep,” I said, putting on my seat belt. “I just got hard.”
He laughed and put on a pair of sunglasses.
Driving around with me in the car wasn’t exactly keeping it inconspicuous. But the windows were tinted enough, so it should’ve been fine.
“Where are we going?” I asked, once he’d pulled out of the garage and got on the main road. I knew of a few parks and a campground not far from town, but it made me nervous to go to any of them. They were usually crowded this time of year, and we were bound to run into someone we knew. “Hopefully somewhere not too busy.”
“Don’t worry.” Emery rested a hand on my leg. I linked our fingers, loving the feel of his strong hand in mine. “If you don’t mind the drive, I know of a great place an hour and a half north of here called War Eagle.”
“The place with the historic mill?” I asked. “There’s also a nature center and museum, right?”
“You’ve heard of it.” He smiled and squeezed my hand a little tighter. “There’s a great hiking trail too.”
During the drive, we went back and forth picking some of our favorite songs for the other person to listen to. He let me hear the “Moon River” song, and I played him one from Sick Beat.
“That’s the group Ryan loves,” Emery said, before pressing his lips together. He listened to the first verse and the chorus. “It’s… different.”
“You can say it sucks,” I said, grinning. “It won’t hurt my feelings. We don’t have to like the same things.”
“But I do like many of the things you do.” I couldn’t read his expression since he was wearing sunglasses, but I imagined that soft look in his eyes when he said the words. “I also like learning from you when we have our differences.”
“Keep talking like that and I’ll make you pull the car over.”
He turned his head toward me before glancing back at the road. “Why?”
“So I can straddle you and ride that beautiful cock.”
The car swerved a little.
Satisfied with myself, I smiled and looked out the window.
When we arrived at War Eagle, Emery parked near the mill so we could get out and have a look around. They had a gift shop inside where you could buy freshly made jams, and he bought a jar of blueberry. We didn’t hold hands as we walked through the mill, but every so often his fingers would touch mine as our arms hung at our sides.
Each time we touched, a little spark of electricity shot up my arm and to my chest.
As we left the mill and stood on the small cliff overlooking the river behind it, I scooted closer to him.
“I’d love to kiss you right now,” Emery said, staring at the water. The gentle breeze ruffled his black hair.
We were nearly two hours from home. No one we knew was around. The connection sizzled between us, and my body heated in response, drawing us even closer together. I wanted to kiss him too.
I slid my arm around his waist and turned to him. “Then do it.”
He’d taken off his sunglasses before we got out of the car, so I was able to see the spark of surprise as he looked down at me. “Are you sure? I don’t want to pressure you or—”
Taking his face in my hands, I brought our lips together.
He moaned softly and tangled his fingers in my hair, cupping the side of my head. My heart was beating in my throat, having jumped up and wedged there when our mouths touched. But I didn’t want to pull away.
It felt too incredible.
This is what I want. To live—and love—openly.
“Ready to go on that hike?” Emery asked an inch from my lips, his thumb stroking my jawline.
“In a second.” I glided my hands up his back, pressing myself as close to him as possible. I laid my head on his shoulder. His heart beat against mine, the same fast rhythm.
“We can stay here as long as you want.” His arms tightened around me, and I felt so damn safe.
I hadn’t felt safe too often in my life. I’d always been hurt by my mom’s boyfriends, chased out of the house when I couldn’t take it anymore. I’d had to grow up way too fast and be the parent after my dad left.
With Emery, I could just be. No worries. Nothing but security and warmth.
I sighed and nuzzled his neck before peering up at him. The blue sky above him set off his eyes, and as the breeze continued to blow, bringing with it the scent of the river and the smell of cedar and pine, I stood in that moment with him, unmoving and lost in his sapphire eyes. As if time itself froze.
“Why are you staring at me like that?” Emery asked, his lids a little heavy as he glanced at my mouth and back up again.
“Just memorizing your face,” I answered, stepping away from him. “Because if we go in those woods and a serial killer comes after us, I’m leaving you in the dust.”
He laughed and started walking toward the trail. I stared at his retreating form before jogging to catch up to him. My heart was still in my throat, but I played it off cool.
The real reason I’d stared at him—of why I couldn’t look away—scared me. So, I had made a joke instead of saying the truth… that, somehow, during the month and a half we’d been in each other’s lives… I had fallen for him completely.
Chapter 18
Emery
“The appeal was denied for Ritter,” Becca told me first thing Monday morning.
I paused, the coffee in my hand inches from my mouth. It took all my willpower not to look happy by the news. I worked my ass off on every case, and Jeff Ritter’s appeal—had it been approved—would’ve been no exception. But it was a relief to be done with it. At least for the time being.
I took a drink and set the cup down.
“Wow,” Becca said. “You look like I just gave you the weather report.”
“He can file again in a different court,” I reminded her. “It’s not over yet.”
“Let’s pray it is. That guy gives me the creeps.” She came over and placed a stack of papers in the tray on my desk. “Just need your approval on those and I can send them out.”
“You’re on top of it this morning,” I said, draining the rest of my coffee. God, I was exhausted. A certain eighteen-year-old had kept me up until one a.m. pounding my ass.
“Just motivated to kick today’s butt,” Becca answered, slapping her bicep. “I’ve started a new workout routine, and I have so much more energy in the mornings.”
“Well, while you’re kicking butt, can you also get me more coffee?” I asked, sliding my cup toward her. “Please?”
“Oh, look at you.” She furrowed her brow and snatched the cup off the desk. “Giving me those big blue eyes that you know I can’t resist. You should be ashamed.”
“Thanks, Bec,” I said, as she headed for the door.
She mumbled and disappeared down the hall.
I looked over my schedule for the day. An appointment with a client at ten, another at one thirty, and court at three. The business was great, but I tended to overwork myself a lot by taking on too many clients at once. Poor Becca dealt with the brunt of it, since she had to take care of most of the paperwork and answer the phone when all of them called asking for updates on their cases.
I’d n
eed to treat her and her future husband to something really nice for their wedding next month.
Becca walked in with my coffee, along with a box of donuts, and set both on my desk.
I groaned as I looked at the sweets. “You’re killing me here. My metabolism isn’t what it used to be.”
“One donut won’t hurt you, Emery.” She took one from the box and placed it on a napkin. “There. I’m removing most of the temptation.”
“Thanks,” I said dryly. When she left my office, I took a sip of my coffee before concentrating on the computer document. After a minute, I gave in and ate the chocolate donut. Good thing she took the rest with her, otherwise I wouldn’t have had any self-control and probably would’ve eaten the whole damn box.
My phone rang an hour into my work, and I checked the name before answering.
“Foley?”
“Hey, Cross,” Jay said, his smooth voice sounding like sex incarnate. “Got a minute?”
We hadn’t spoken since the night we argued about Cason. No texts or anything. I had wanted to give him space to wrap his head around it, and when a week had passed with no word from him, I had assumed he was done with me.
“I have an appointment at ten,” I said, glancing at the clock and seeing it was twenty past nine. “But I can talk for a bit.”
Jay exhaled and was quiet a moment. “I’m sorry for how I acted. It was a shock. I never imagined you’d pull a stunt like that.”
“It’s not a stunt,” I said, leaning back in my chair and watching the rain fall outside the window. “I care about Cason. A lot.”
“I know. I can hear it in your voice when you talk about him. I saw it all over your face that night too.”
“So why did you get so pissed, Foley?”
“He’s a kid.”
“No, he’s not,” I snapped. “He’s old enough to know what he wants, and for some goddamn reason he wants me. I fought my attraction for him for months, and I was tired of fighting.”
“Okay.”
A tic started in my jaw. “Okay?”
“Yeah. Okay. Now lower your voice, darlin’. I’m sure that vein is popping out of your forehead like it always does when you’re mad.”
I rubbed at the popping vein in question and took a deep, calming breath. How was it that he knew me so well?
“Better?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Since we’re being honest here, I have another confession,” Jay said, followed by him speaking to someone on the other end of the line. Something about a court date, and he verified it. Then, he was talking to me again, “Sorry, my paralegal came in. We’re alone again.”
“Your confession?”
“Right.” Jay exhaled. “It wasn’t just his age that made me act that way. I was jealous.”
It took me a moment to process his words. He was jealous? Of Cason?
“Why?” I asked, tapping a finger on the arm of my chair. “There’s never been anything more than sex between us, and you said yourself that you don’t want a relationship.”
“I don’t.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“You’re my only real friend, Emery,” Jay said. His use of my first name told me how serious he was. “And as stupid as it is, I saw how head over heels you were for this fucking kid, and it got under my skin because I thought he was going to take you from me.”
“Why would he take me from you? You’re still my friend. My relationship status doesn’t change that.”
“How many men would be comfortable with you hanging out with a guy that used to suck your cock?” Jay asked. “My guess is not very many.”
“Cason knows about our history,” I said. “He was uncomfortable at first, sure, but when I explained everything, he was fine. He has no problem with me still hanging out with you.”
“So you talked about me, huh?” Jay asked with a smile in his voice.
“Of course. I had to explain the hot blond bastard I was having a drink with.”
When Jay laughed, I knew we were okay again.
I hadn’t realized how upset I was to be at odds with him until then. Because through it all, Jay had been there for me. My divorce, the secrets, and everything that followed. He was more than just a guy who used to suck my cock. Way more.
“Maybe I can meet him sometime,” Jay said. “Does he call you Daddy?”
“I’m hanging up now,” I said, suppressing a sigh.
“Later, Daddy.”
“Fuck off.”
He was laughing when I disconnected the call.
A few minutes later, my phone dinged and I looked away from the document I was reading to check it.
Damsel: Hey, I got a lawyer thing for you.
He then sent a meme that said, A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.
I snorted and replied.
Me: I’m on good terms with many of the judges. Also, shouldn’t you be working?
Damsel: It’s slow today and I can’t stop thinking about you.
My chest warmed. I never expected to feel so strongly about Cason, but it was unstoppable.
The outing with him the day before had been the best day I’d had in a while. We had hiked the trail, then grabbed the ice chest from the car and went to a picnic table overlooking a valley and ate. Once we were finished eating, we went inside the nature center and checked out the museum. I’d even held his hand.
Me: Do you want to come over again tonight?
I had slept beside him for so many nights that I hated the thought of not doing so.
Damsel: :)
Taking that as a yes, I set my phone aside and prepared for the appointment with my new client. A woman had hired me for her son, who had been picked up for possession of a controlled substance with intent to sell. With his record of past charges, the prosecution was coming down harder on him.
“Please just keep him out of prison,” the woman begged me once she had arrived for the meeting. “He’s a good kid who was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“My job isn’t to determine guilt, Mrs. Jacobs,” I said, holding up a hand. She was a sobbing mess, and I couldn’t blame her. Her son was facing five years or more. “I’ll do all I can to get him the best deal possible.”
After she left, I compiled a list of discovery I needed to request from the prosecution: police reports from his latest arrest as well as the past ones and any available video footage from the gas station he was picked up at.
I had just enough time to grab something quick to eat for lunch before I had to be back at the office for my next appointment.
***
Cason smiled as he sat at my kitchen table looking over his textbooks for his first semester of college.
He’d gone to the campus bookstore earlier that day and picked up the books he needed, supplies like a new flash drive, and a hoodie with the school name printed on the front. He was excited to be a University of Arkansas Fort Smith lion.
I stood behind him, resting a hand on his shoulder as I looked at his books. Introduction to Law, Police Systems and Practices, and Courts and Criminal Procedure. He also had two general courses, college algebra and English lit.
“You’ll have a busy fall semester,” I said. “Fortunately for you, I know the professors for three of your classes.”
“I don’t want special treatment.” Cason turned his head and kissed the inside of my wrist. “Plus, you can’t exactly tell them we’re together when they ask how you know me.”
We wouldn’t be a secret forever. At least, I hoped we wouldn’t be. But he was right.
“I can say you’re Ryan’s best friend.”
“That’s still special treatment.” His brown eyes playfully narrowed. “I’ll be fine on my own.” He returned his gaze to the books. “I’m excited. I’ll be the first one in my family to go to college.”
“I’m proud of you.”
Cason had grown up in a rough environment, and his home life was tough with a mom w
ho couldn’t stay clean and who dated piece-of-shit men. And yet, he had turned out amazing. He’d worked hard and was going to make something of himself, refusing to fall victim to the hand he’d been dealt in life.
“Ryan encouraged me to go for it,” Cason said, tracing the edge of the law textbook. “I was doing well in school when we became friends, but I didn’t think I could get into college. That was something I wanted but felt was unattainable. He then said I was the smartest guy he knew, and if I didn’t apply for college, he’d kick my ass.”
“Sounds like Ryan.”
Cason nodded. “I hate keeping this from him. You and me.”
Guilt snaked through me too. “I know. I feel the same.”
The last secret I’d kept from Ryan had nearly destroyed our relationship when he finally found out. What would happen this time when the truth came to light?
Cason’s phone buzzed and he grinned as he read the message.
Having the urge to pry but knowing I shouldn’t, I walked away from the table and grabbed pork chops from the refrigerator to start dinner.
“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” Cason said. “Remember Faith? The girl I’ve been talking to?”
“The artsy one, right?” I grabbed a skillet and placed it on the stove, flipping on the burner.
“Yeah. Well, she, uh…” He paused, and I looked at him over my shoulder, seeing his brows pulled together. “She knows I’m gay.”
“You told her?”
Did he have a bad experience? My protectiveness over him kicked in.
“Not exactly,” he said, averting his eyes. “She kinda guessed.” When he smiled, I relaxed. “If I had known she was into yaoi, I probably would’ve told her sooner. She just sent me a pic of hot anime guys getting it on.”
“What’s yaoi?”
“Boy Love manga stories,” Cason explained. “They focus on gay relationships, usually extremely sexually explicit.”
“Have you read them?” I asked, smiling. The thought of him getting off on it was pretty damn hot.
“A little,” he answered, blushing. “I found some sites online and skimmed some of them.”
“Skimmed the raunchy parts, you mean.”
His Temptation Page 18
