The Rocker That Needs Me (The Rocker...)

by Terri Anne Browning

  “Yeah. You want something?” my deep voiced roommate called back.

  “Got anything harder than beer? I need a drink.” He knew that I was kidding. I had only gotten drunk once since moving to New York. That night had been bad, and I didn’t want to relive it.

  “How about a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and some hot fudge?” He appeared at the end of the couch with the ice cream in one hand and the hot fudge in the other. One look at my face and the hulky man dropped down beside me. “What’s up?”

  “My brother-in-law is picking me up at six.”

  “Jesse Thornton, right?” I nodded. “So what’s the problem?”

  “It’s a surprise visit. I don’t know why he’s here, and all he said when I asked was that he needed to see me.” I pushed my hair away from my face. “He never does things like this, and I’m worried something is wrong.”

  Linc cracked his neck, making me grimace. It was what he always did when he was thinking. After spending the last seven months under the same roof with him, and my two other roommates, I knew all his little quirks. “I guess you will just have to wait and see,” he finally said.

  I glared at him. “Thanks for those words of wisdom, babe.” I rolled my eyes at him and took the ice cream.

  He winked as he got to his feet. “Anytime, sweets. Anytime.”

  I threw the lid at his retreating back. It bounced off his hard ass and landed on the end of the couch. “Where are Dallas and Harper? I figured they would be back by now.”

  “Still shopping.”

  I hoped they would be back before Jesse got here. It was already after four, and I needed my two best friends here to diffuse the whole “Linc is living in the apartment” situation. It wasn’t like he didn’t know that I had a male roommate. I had told Layla and Jesse all about him. Fitness model, check. Good friend, check. Gay, double check.

  Linc was all of those things. But looking at him, talking to him, you would never guess that he was one of the gayest men on the planet. He was sexy as sin, and I will honestly admit that when the dude walked around in little to nothing—okay, sometimes nothing at all!—I wasn’t shy about looking. Neither were Harper and Dallas.

  Still, it was going to be hard to convince Jesse that big, hulking, sin on two legs Linc Spencer was the guy I had told him all about. When I had first met Linc, I hadn’t believed that he was gay either. It had taken him bringing some random guy home from a club one night to make me believe. And only then when they had started making some very X-rated sounds from the bedroom across from the one I shared with Harper.

  Yeah, Jesse was going to hit the roof when he showed up to pick me up.

  At five, my roommates still weren’t home, and I rushed to get ready. By ten to six, I was ready and waiting, impatient to get this over with. I was almost tempted to ask Linc to hide when Jesse got here but didn’t want to hurt my friend’s feelings. He was a Demon’s Wings fan and would want to meet Jesse.

  The door opening startled me, and I looked up to find both Harper and Dallas entering the apartment. Each had their arms loaded with bags, and I figured Dallas was being rebellious again and maxing out her mother’s credit cards. Her hair was pulled back from her face, exposing the dimple in her right cheek. She had been one of Europe’s highest paid models from the age of fifteen until last year when she had turned twenty-one.

  That was when her contract had come up for renewal with her agent and she had refused to sign on again. Modeling had never been her thing. In fact, she hated every second of it. Her mother had been the one to force Dallas into it and signed the original contract, making her unable to get out of it until it ran out. When Dallas had refused to continue, her mother had gone ballistic.

  Since then, she had made sure that her mother wouldn’t want her to do the model thing. She had tattooed and pierced her body until her mother nearly had a stroke from just looking at her. I applauded Dallas’ rebellion. It was her body, after all.

  Of course I had lent my support and went to get a tattoo with her on Valentines’ Day. My first ink had left me with an addiction for it. I was already thinking of what I wanted next, and this time I was going to go all out with a big piece of ink on my back. Compared to Dallas, Harper looked like a librarian in her cashmere skirt and cardigan. Her caramel colored hair was pulled back in a French braid and her glasses hid those lavender eyes of hers. I had met Harper my first day of NYU, and we had become friends fast. When my roommate had gone all psychotic bitch on me the second week of spring term, and I had needed a place to stay, she offered me the twin bed in her room.

  “Hey, you should see the car downstairs,” Harper said as she dropped down beside me on the couch. “Stretch limo in front of this building? That just seems too funny.”

  I grimaced. “That’s probably Jesse.”

  Harper’s eyes grew huge behind her dark frames. “What’s he doing here? Did you know he was coming?”

  I shook my head. “Not until about two hours ago.” I stood and smoothed a hand over my sundress, a gift from Dallas the last time her mother had pissed her off and she had gone Fifth Avenue crazy on her mom’s cards.

  Just as I slipped on my wedges, the phone rang. Dallas picked it up because she was the closest to it. “Yes?” she asked, her southern accent never failing to make me smile. “Oh. Okay. He can come up.” She replaced the phone and grinned at me. “Rock star in the building!”

  Linc came out of his room down the hall. His hair was damp and all he was wearing was a pair of basketball shorts and a smile. My mind went blank for a moment as I drooled over the sight of all those hard angled abs and tight pecks. And then I remembered that Jesse was on his way up in the elevator and Linc was running around half naked.

  “Put a shirt on!” I said, pushing him back down the hall to his room. “And some pants. Your free balling and I don’t want my brother-in-law getting hysterical about you walking around with your junk hanging free!”

  Linc laughed. “Oh my God, Lana! Relax. I can handle your in-law.”

  I pushed him hard. “Go, Linc. Please.” The doorbell rang and I jumped. “Please,” I cried. He didn’t know Jesse like I did. I didn’t want my friend with a broken nose or something bleeding.

  Harper was already standing by the door. “Wait!” I called to her, making sure the door to Linc’s room was closed behind him before letting her answering the door. “Okay, go ahead,” I said, smoothing my dress down once again.

  Harper giggled and pulled the door open. I wasn’t ready, but then I doubted I ever would be.

  When I saw Jesse standing in the door way my heart hurt. I hadn’t seen him since he and Layla had flown out to New York with me in January. He looked good, especially in his suit. Despite the anxiety I felt over his reaction to Linc, I found myself running across the living room and throwing my arms around Jesse.

  Strong arms tightened around me as he lifted me off the ground in a bear hug. He laughed and swung me around once before setting me on my feet. “It’s good to see you, Lana.”

  I had to blink to keep the tears from falling. “I don’t know why you’re here, but I’m so happy to see you.”

  His eyes darkened, changing colors rapidly. “We can talk later.” His raised his eyes to look at Harper and then Dallas. This was the first time he had seen my roommates and best friends. “Hello, ladies,” he greeted with an easy smile.

  “Oh shit.” Dallas fanned herself with her hand. “You are hotter in person than I expected.”

  I rolled my eyes at her. “Jess, this is Dallas Bradshaw and that’s Harper Jones.” I introduced them. “Guys, you know who he is, so whatever.”

  Harper giggled and offered Jesse her hand. “Nice to finally meet you, Jesse.”

  “You too, Harper.” He winked at Dallas who was still sitting on the couch. “And you’re the trash mouth I keep hearing in the background when Layla calls.”

  Dallas shrugged. “I do what I can.”

  Jesse glanced around. “And the other roommate? Linc, right?”<
br />
  I mentally groaned and prayed that Linc wouldn’t come out. Of course he picked that moment to open his bedroom door. I closed my eyes, waiting for the explosion that was sure to erupt. “Hey, man. I’m Linc.”

  Cautiously, I peeked open one eye, glancing at Jesse. His eyes narrowed at the other man, but he wasn’t sprouting curses or swinging fists. I took it as a good sign but didn’t want to push my luck, so I pulled Jesse toward the door. “I assume you are taking me to dinner. I’m starving, let’s go.”

  He was quiet all the way down in the elevator, his big hands thrust into the pockets of his suit pants. There was a driver standing by the door to the limo, and I gave him a small smile as he opened it for me. When we were settled inside, the limo pulled out into traffic. “Okay, let’s hear it.”

  “That guy is gay?” he exploded. “No way. He can’t be…”

  I grinned. “And you would know…how?”

  “Don’t get cute with me, Lana. Your sister is going to shit a brick!”

  I cocked a brow at him. “Are you sure you’re worried about Layla’s reaction? Or someone else’s?”

  “Lana…” He rubbed a hand over his smooth head, telling me that he was frustrated. “Let’s wait and talk when we get to the restaurant. Please?”

  “Only if you tell me this doesn’t have something to do with Layla or Lucy? Are they okay?”

  “Both are fine. And Layla is here with me. She’s going to join us later.”

  Excitement shot through me. I talked to my sister every day, but a phone call didn’t make up for getting to see Layla. My excitement was short lived because I knew that if this wasn’t about either of my sisters, then that only left one other reason for Jesse to be here like this. I turned my head away so he couldn’t see my expression and gazed out the side window as the limo drove through Wednesday evening traffic in New York City.

  The restaurant the limo stopped in front of was so popular there was a six month waiting list for reservations. I had only heard about it, and I really hadn’t had any real urge to try the place out. Expensive food only gave me indigestion, especially when I was presented with the bill.

  I figured we would have to wait for a table, but I guess Emmie had worked her magic and had gotten Jesse a quiet table in the back. People actually stopped eating as we passed, and I couldn’t help but feel self-conscious. When we reached our table, I breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Really? You had to bring me here?”

  Jesse grinned. “Yes. I had to bring you here.”

  “Why? Couldn’t you have just taken me to McDonald’s and bought me a cheeseburger?” That was more me. This place? Not so much!

  The waiter brought wine, which I didn’t want. Jesse ignored his glass in favor of his water. I didn’t bother to glance at the menu. It was probably in French or some other language anyway. Instead, I glared at the man seated across me. “I’m getting impatient, Jesse.”

  He blew out a long sigh. “I know. I’m trying to work up to it.” I rolled my eyes and he laughed. “We all miss you, you know. It’s the little things that make me think about you.”

  “I miss you too, Jess.”

  Jesse tossed his menu aside and reached for my hands. “There’s something I want to talk to you about. I need you to really listen, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  “There is a new show that’s starting in September. It’s called America’s Rocker.” He rolled his eyes when I laughed. Yeah, okay. “Axton Cage was asked to sit on the panel of judges, but one of the other two judges backed out, and Ax said that he wanted someone from Demon’s Wings or he was backing out too. The network agreed.”

  I frowned. “So are you going to be in New York more?” I smiled. “That’s great, Jesse!” I would get to see him and my sisters often.

  He was shaking his head. “Nik and I both turned it down, and Emmie was about to tell the network to get lost when Drake agreed to do it.”

  I sat up straighter in my chair. “What?”

  “Everything is taking place here in New York. Everything. The tryouts, the show, the finale. Drake will be here next week. Emmie has already found him an apartment. Shane is coming out here with him.”

  I ran a trembling hand through my hair. I hadn’t spoken to Drake since before I had moved to New York. Somehow, I had succeeded in avoiding him until I left. It had killed something inside of me when I left, unable to tell him goodbye, but as the weeks went by and I settled into my new life, things had gotten better. My heart was still shattered, but at least I had swept up the pieces.

  Through Jesse and Layla, and even Shane, I had heard that Drake had checked himself into rehab and actually finished it this time. It had been big news in the rock world for about a week. Drake Stevenson sober. It had been a miracle, everyone said. People wondered what had brought on the sudden need to clean up his act.

  I talked to Shane regularly, and he always took the chance to tell me that his brother was doing well. Always telling me how many days Drake had been sober, like it was a new mile stone, and really it was. I was proud of him, but that didn’t stop my heart from aching.

  It didn’t stop me from wanting him to hold me every night.

  But I had given up hope of that ever happening a long time ago.

  Chapter 11

  Lana

  When I had first gotten to New York, part of me—a really big part—had hoped that it would force Drake to realize that he was in love with me. I had lain in bed for two weeks straight, mentally willing him to come after me. Every day, I would search the crowd looking for him. Any guy with overly long, dark hair would make me stop, and I would hold my breath, only to be disappointed when I would realize that it wasn’t Drake.

  When I had moved into the apartment with Harper, I stopped crying myself to sleep. I learned to live with the pain, and without realizing it, the pain slowly got easier to deal with. That didn’t mean I didn’t think about him. No, he was on my mind every five minutes. The littlest things would remind me of him.

  Some might think that keeping tabs on Drake through his brother was just feeding my pain, but it helped. Knowing that he was okay gave me some peace, and getting to talk to Shane gave me the smallest of connection to Drake, which I hung onto by my fingernails.

  It had also made Shane and me closer. He was a big part of my day to day, even if I hadn’t seen him in seven months. If I went a day without talking to him, it made me sad. If I missed one of his calls, he blew up my phone with texts until I called him back. Maybe he was keeping tabs on me for his brother, but I didn’t care.

  Now, as I stared at my phone after having just gotten home from dinner with Jesse and my sister, I couldn’t help but wonder what the younger Stevenson brother was up too. It was after eleven here, so that meant it was still early in California, just after eight. More than likely he hadn’t gone out yet.

  Sighing, I pulled up his name on my phone and hit send. It rang three times before he answered. “You didn’t tell me,” I said when I heard his voice on the other end.

  “Jesse wanted to tell you first,” he assured me, knowing exactly what I was talking about without having to ask. “So… What do you think? We can hang out when I get into town.”

  “Why would he do this, Shane? He hates attention like this, and now he’s going to put himself front and center on a freaking reality television show.” I closed my eyes, a headache making my eyes throb.

  Shane paused, as if thinking about what to say before he spoke. “He has his reasons, Lana. Maybe one day he will tell you about them. Until then, let’s talk about you and me and the best burger in the world. I know this great burger joint, and I want to take you there.”

  Rolling my eyes, I lay back on the couch. Might as well get comfortable. “When do you get in?”

  “Tuesday. Drake has to be there for tryouts on Friday, and he wants to be settled in by then. So, let’s go out Thursday. I’ll pick you up…unless you want to come over to our apartment?”

  “Um, no. That
’s okay.” I wasn’t sure I was ready to see Drake face to face yet. “Thursday is fine. I’ll stay home and wait with bated breath for your arrival, stud.”

  He chuckled. “Great. And then Friday you can show me the best jogging trail to take through Central Park.”

  “I don’t run through the park. I go to the gym and use the treadmills.”

  “No way! I’m ashamed of you, Lana! Okay, then we will find them together. After the burgers we are going to need the exercise…Ah, crap!”

  “What?” I demanded, startled when I heard someone else’s voice in the background. Was that a girl? “Shane, really? Next time I call and you’re with some skank, do me a favor and don’t answer!”

  “I’m not with some skank, Lana!” Shane assured me. “I’m meeting Emmie and Nik for dinner. That was the waitress.”

  “Sure it was.” I laughed. “Liar. I’ll let you go so you can get to your…dinner.”

  “You are such a bitch sometimes,” he muttered.

  “Yeah, I know. See you Thursday.”

  “Can’t wait. Love ya, sweetheart.”

  “Love you too, Shane.” With a quivering chin, I hit the end button and tossed my phone aside.

  --

  It felt like Thursday took forever to come around. My roommates avoided me at times because I was equal parts anxious and excited and that made for horrible mood swings. Linc kept giving me the evil eye, not sure if my behavior was from PMS or if I was just being my sometimes bitchy self.

  I had one class Thursday morning. Trying to cram three months of Biology material into five weeks over the summer break was not fun, but I was glad for the challenge. Still, as soon as my professor excused us, I pulled out my cell to see if I had missed any texts from Shane.

  Pick you up @ 1. Can’t wait for dinner 2 c u.

  A glance at the clock on my phone told me that I wasn’t going to make it to my apartment in time unless I grabbed a cab. Muttering a curse, I flagged one down and tossed the driver an incentive to get me home as quick as he could. New York cab drivers in a hurry made for a terrifying ride. I just covered my eyes and waited for the car to finally come to a stop.