Pieces of Us: A Confessions of the Heart Stand-Alone Novel

by Jackson, A. L.

  The love I had for her.

  The loss that would never be repaired.

  My failure to be better. To save her.

  I’d been too weak. Too weak.

  Reeling, I angled my head. “It was actually you? You were responsible for him getting arrested?”

  I blinked, trying to process. They tried to . . . take me away from him?

  “Your mama always denied the beatings, always making up absurd stories that a child wouldn’t even believe. But my Brianne heard it going on one day. You were screaming bloody murder, just a tiny thing, and she ran over there. Got in the middle of it. Got beat up bad. But she wasn’t afraid to sit on that stand and testify against that monster.”

  “You actually think you’re somethin’? Somethin’ special? Those pig fuckers fillin’ your head with lies, too?”

  He took another step closer while I stood there frozen. “We woulda done anything for you, Maxon. Our house was your home. Didn’t approve so much of you going through our daughter’s window, but we saw that bond. You were family. Through and through.”

  He shifted, drawing attention to what he held in his hands.

  Emotion crushed my ribs.

  The book. My mother’s book.

  Mr. Lane frowned, his scraggly eyebrows pulling together. “You know, it was funny when my grandson wanted me to read this with him last night before we tucked them in. Said something about it being from his dad’s mother, that it was special.”

  He glanced down at it before he looked back at me. “It is special, Maxon, but it wasn’t from your mother. Izzy made this for you with a little help from her mama. After you saved them. She believed it held the truth of who you were. That it might show you what you meant to her and the way she’d always seen you. How we’ve all seen you. You’d been too blinded by self-hatred to see it for yourself. Never got the chance to thank you for that . . . for you savin’ them.”

  Agony ricocheted through my spirit, pinging from one side to the other. My head spun. I reached up and grabbed two handfuls of hair to try to make sense of it.

  “No . . . my mother . . . it was in her things.”

  I blinked, trying to see through the disorder.

  He shook his head. “Izzy brought this to you the night she took off, Maxon. She couldn’t go on a day more without you knowing who you’d always been to her. Who you’d been to us. The faith we had in you. She dropped it there on the ground when she found you with that girl. Pretty sure she left her heart with it.”

  Oh God.

  Izzy.

  She’d seen me with Clarissa. That was why she’d run so far. I knew she’d hear about us, but the last thing I’d wanted was her to have to witness it.

  Pain lanced, and those pieces that had been scattered between us shivered.

  Strewn between thirteen years and two thousand miles.

  Could sense them rushing to come back together.

  “You’re everything to them, Maxon. To Izzy and those boys, and I’m not gonna stand aside and let you mess that up again without sayin’ my piece. You’ve messed up. Messed up good. But I’ve always known you belonged. Always considered you my son. A part of our family. Don’t get stupid and ruin that now.”

  Benjamin’s crooked smile flashed through my mind, and Dillon’s laughter echoed in my ear.

  I felt the pressure of Izzy’s hand on my heart.

  It was her all along.

  I’d told Benjamin I’d found that book when I’d needed it most.

  It was the truth.

  It was on what was probably my darkest day.

  I’d found out Izzy had left town, and the little bit of light left inside me had gone dim. I’d been close to giving in, two seconds from following in my father’s seedy footsteps.

  Kiel had been bugging me to get back on board. Told me I owed it to him and Clarissa. That it was stupid to resist because I was just going to end up there anyway.

  I’d found it, my heart in my throat as I’d turned the pages and read the story, as I’d felt the illustrations. The message of it had been so staggering that it’d dropped me to my knees.

  It was the day I’d made the decision to join the force. To commit my life to making a small bit of the world a better place. To give rather than take.

  A penance. A punishment.

  To prove to my mama that something good could rise out of the ashes.

  That I was the dragon, after all.

  My dragon.

  Izzy’s tender voice swamped me.

  Her belief.

  It was her. It was her.

  I jumped when my phone went off in my back pocket, and it jerked me out of the memories and the realization that pierced me like an arrow.

  Invading.

  Cleansing.

  Little Bird.

  All along, it had been her who’d been my savior. The one who had made me want to be better.

  Different.

  I dug out my phone. Pete’s name lit the screen. “Yeah?” I answered, voice clogged in desperation.

  He didn’t hesitate. “I found the connection. Had to dig pretty deep, but Zachary Keeton is Clarissa’s third cousin. That car that ran you and Izzy off the road last night? It had been reported stolen. Driver ditched it in midtown Charleston.”

  It was instant.

  The threads coming together.

  A tie.

  This kid had been working with Kiel and Clarissa.

  Their fucking scheme had been going on for years. Even though I had no details, my gut had known it, and out of some fucked-up obligation, I’d turned a blind eye.

  I’d assigned her credit for saving Izzy that day.

  And I wondered if that had been Clarissa’s plan all along.

  Clarissa’s warning from last night threaded through my being. “Now, she needs to go. Send her away, Mack, before it’s too late. She doesn’t belong here with you.”

  “Get me two officers here, now,” I grated, a disquiet unlike anything I’d felt before rushing through my spirit.

  Ending the call, I met Mr. Lane’s worried gaze before I was shouting, “Go around the back of the house, make sure it’s clear. I’m going through the front.”

  Then I was running. Sprinting across the meadow and through the trees and out onto the lawn.

  Fear in my throat. Protection lining my bones.

  I would never allow anything to happen to them. They were my destiny. My purpose. My right.

  And I was finished letting my past dictate that.

  I would ensure everything was safe at the house, wait for the officers to show, and then I was ending this.

  Clarissa and Kiel and this punk kid were going down.

  Pulling my gun from its holster, I broke out into the clearing, only to stumble with the force of the unrest that tumbled through the heavens.

  Same as it’d been that day.

  A quiet violence that skimmed and shivered through the sky.

  I started running for the house. That sensation only amplified with each thud of my boots.

  I scanned the area, eyes bouncing around as I started for the porch steps, only to freeze when I felt the sickness claw over me from behind.

  The disorder that rippled through the air.

  Intense and thick.

  “Well, if it isn’t our favorite cop. Been looking for you.” The words were nothing but a sneer, a rip of hatred.

  Slowly, I turned around to find that prick slinking out from where Mr. Lane’s truck was parked on the far-left side of the yard.

  Zachary had a gun on me. Hatred curled his expression in disdain.

  The feeling was mutual.

  This was the guy who I’d instantly sensed a darkness in. Gut telling me something was wrong. Now, that vileness crawled across the ground, like the spindly fingers of a demon clawing in the dirt.

  Sinking in.

  Staking ground.

  I started to run for him until I saw the barest hint of movement against the wheel of Mr. Lane’s truck.
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br />   Panic hit me like I’d smacked face-first into a brick-wall.

  Izzy.

  Little Bird.

  Agony squeezed my chest as a bout of rage came speeding in.

  Fierce and uncontrolled.

  She was on the ground behind him, wrists and ankles bound, a gag in her mouth.

  Hazel eyes flashed, swimming with a plea.

  My soul screamed, horror wrapping me in vicious chains.

  It hit me so hard, I nearly tripped.

  Sweat gathered on my hairline, quivers rising up from that dark place, the brutal instinct to protect.

  I refused to let this happen. Refused to let him hurt her.

  “Drop the gun,” I shouted as I lifted mine, edging off to the side of the porch steps.

  I aimed my gun at this sick motherfucker, terror locking up my throat and narrowing my sight.

  Everything focused on taking this bastard out.

  Ending this.

  He didn’t even flinch, just grinned as he took a step my direction. “You weren’t supposed to walk away that night. And here you are, still standing. Looks like we’re going to have to fix that.”

  “Put the gun down,” I ordered again, words harsh, my finger firm on the trigger.

  He laughed, letting the gun swing at his side, in the general vicinity of Izzy.

  Almost sent me flying at him then.

  But I had to remain steady.

  Smart.

  Couldn’t mess this up.

  “What, this make you upset? That someone’s got an up on you? Your future in their hands rather than the other way around?”

  Izzy whimpered and writhed on the dirt.

  I calculated if I could get in a hit without putting her in the line of fire.

  The risk was too great.

  Violence gathered like a physical entity, cords wrapping my limbs, flames of aggression eating up my body.

  “No idea what Clarissa sees in you,” he spat like the little punk he was. “Protecting you all this time. Done with you gettin’ in our way.”

  “What the hell are you talking about?” I demanded. I was desperate to draw attention to myself. To take it off Izzy. Asshole needed to forget that she was even there.

  He laughed and rushed an agitated hand through his hair, and it was then I realized he was tweakin’, kid methed out, antsy and irritated.

  Made this whole situation a million times more dangerous.

  “Come on, asshole, you think I don’t know you’re just waitin’ on the perfect moment to screw us? Not going to jail because my cousin is in love with your dick.”

  Hostility raged, and I tried to keep it cool when I was being incinerated by this fire consuming me from within.

  To remember my training.

  Knowing what was at stake when the only thing I wanted was to rush this fucker and bash his face.

  “If you go to jail, it’s because you put yourself there, not because of me,” I rumbled, trying to ease to the side.

  To draw him closer.

  To make him forget the girl he was standing too close to.

  He barked a laugh. “Fuckin’ cops, thinking they own us. Not today. Clarissa just wanted me to scare this bitch.” He jostled the gun at Izzy.

  Whimpering, she pressed her face into her shoulder, desperate to hide and chained in plain sight.

  “Make her see you aren’t worth the pain. Chase her back to wherever she’d come from. She’s pissed I decided to take this farther, but she’s gonna learn real fast she doesn’t get to control me, either. No one does. I do what I want. Kiel’s gonna know I’m his main man.”

  Fuck.

  This kid was nuts. Fucking delusional. Capable of anything.

  I inched another step to the right. Only thing I needed was one clean shot.

  “This is a mistake, man.” Did my best to sound placating. Convincing. To talk him down. “You don’t want life for this. Think about it. Look how long they put my dad away for what he did. You hurt her, and you won’t see the light of day.”

  He’d started to edge to the left, natural instinct to get away from the barrel of a gun.

  Exactly what I needed him to do.

  “That’s glory, man.”

  Pete was right.

  This crime for the sake of crime was insane. Completely insane. And I knew that was exactly what I was dealing with.

  Izzy’s spirit throbbed and groaned, that energy moving across the ground.

  Horror and the hope she’d always had in me.

  Silently promised her that this time, I wouldn’t let her down.

  I took another step along the side of the house, forcing him back another. So close to him being clear. Away from my girl.

  He mimicked to the left. My lungs froze when I saw my window. Quick to aim for his shoulder, to incapacitate but not kill, pulling the trigger even faster.

  Fear crawled down my spine when I realized he’d seen my intentions in the same second, that he was pulling off a shot.

  But I didn’t care.

  I sprinted his direction.

  No thought of the outcome except for the one where Izzy was safe.

  Fire blazed up my right side, and my body jolted with the severe, gutting shock. I fumbled, feet wanting to fail, barely able to stand, but somehow, I managed to force myself to keep moving. Sight clouding, I fought to lift my gun again, knowing the only choice I had was to take him out.

  Asshole grinned like he’d won as he aimed again.

  The grin drained from his face when the butt of a shotgun came down hard on the back of his head.

  From out of nowhere.

  No warning.

  Zachary’s eyes went wide before he dropped to his knees and flopped facedown onto the ground.

  Mr. Lane rushed to stand over him, a foot on his back and his shotgun at the back of his head as he stood guard. With knowing eyes, he lifted his chin and sent me a look that promised it was finished.

  Unable to remain standing, I dropped to my knees.

  Relief blistered and blew while pain screamed and tore through my side. Blood soaked my shirt, but I couldn’t stop, refused to give up. Groaning, I crawled to Izzy, quivers trembling my hands as I met her eye, whispered a thousand apologies as I untied her bindings.

  I managed to free her wrists.

  My girl free.

  It was the only strength I had left, and I slumped over.

  She reached up and jerked the gag out of her mouth.

  “Oh my God, Maxon. Oh my God. You’re hurt. Oh, sweet man.”

  She fumbled to get to me.

  Scrambling to get to her knees, she gathered my head into her lap.

  She held my head close to the beat of her heart.

  To the sweetness of her soul.

  Tender fingers ran through my hair. “I’ve got you. I’ve got you. I’m safe. Me and the boys are safe because of you. Now, I’m goin’ to make sure you’re safe, too. You’re safe.”

  She pressed her lips to my forehead, and I relished in the sensation.

  In her touch.

  I struggled to draw a breath into my lungs that screamed.

  No air.

  Blackness closing in.

  Movement rustled from the side, and I blinked up and saw the worried face of her mama hovering over me. This woman who’d cared for me so much, and still, in a way that I hadn’t understood.

  She pressed a towel to my side, and I could see her trembling with fear, but she was smiling. “Just what you need is another scar to make you look even more appealin’, Mr. Chambers. My girl here isn’t gonna be able to keep her hands off you.”

  A smile tweaked at the corner of her mouth, and she looked over her shoulder and gusted a sigh of relief when she heard sirens coming up the lane.

  Izzy kept whispering her belief into my spirit. “It’s okay, my dragon. It’s okay. You’re gonna be fine. You stay right here with me. Don’t close your eyes. Just stay. Stay.”

  Her mother held pressure on the gunshot wound.
>
  It was almost in the same spot as the wound I’d sustained in the last fight with my father.

  When I’d believed my life a sacrifice.

  Thinking it noble to turn my back to the light rather than to stand in its warmth.

  Through the haze that took me over, I stared up at this girl’s beauty. Her voice as a little girl. As the years had passed. As she’d become my all.

  At this girl who’d been my savior.

  Everything faded as I silently promised to always be hers.

  * * *

  I blinked open my eyes, mind slowed with the drugs I could feel slogging through my veins.

  But my sight was clear.

  My heart right.

  Soul no longer bent.

  Izzy was sitting in a chair across the room with Dillon on her lap, quietly reading him a book, while Benjamin was in a chair right next to me, the side of his face rested on the hospital bed as he watched something on a tablet.

  Izzy’s mom and dad were in the other corner, quietly talking with each other.

  Warmth overflowed the room.

  Love a slow, sated buzz.

  Got the sense they’d been there for a long time.

  Settled in.

  Waiting.

  Standing by my side.

  It was Benjamin who noticed I was awake first. His head popped up, and he sent me one of those crooked, beautiful smiles that shattered me all over again.

  “Dddddad. You’re awake. I was so wwwworried about yyyou.”

  He fumbled to get closer, and emotion pulsed up my arm when I reached out and touched my fingertips to his cheek. “I’m sorry I scared you. It was the last thing I wanted to do.”

  His grin widened. “That’s oookay. You saaaved us.”

  “You got that bad guy good, Mack Daddy!” Dillon said, all too eager. “Grand Pop, too. Boom, bam, bang. Sneak attack. Told you that was the best kind, Grand Pop. Seven cop cars came to our house and a helicopter and two ambulances. Did you know that? I didn’t get to really see it, but Nana told me you were really brave and you saved our mom and us, and now we get to be a family, right?”

  Kid rambled the way he did, and my heart overflowed, throbbed with affection.

  It expanded in a stunning way when I met Izzy’s gaze.

  Soft and sure and right.

  Goodness bleeding out.

  “Hi,” she whispered in her southern drawl as she climbed to standing.