Amelia Fang and the Naughty Caticorns

by Laura Ellen Anderson

  The caticorns were snuggled up together in the empty suitcase that had once been full of new expensive toys.

  ‘SHHHHH, THEY FELL ASLEEP!’ Florence said, as quietly as she could.

  ‘It’s a miracle!’ whispered a relieved-looking Grimaldi.

  Tangine was still sitting on the sofa in deep thought.

  Amelia tiptoed over to her friends and handed out the glasses of sour milk before snuggling up next to Tangine. She took a long sip of the warm, soothing drink.

  ‘Looking at the caticorns now, they seem so cute,’ she said quietly. ‘You’d never believe they could cause so much trouble!’

  ‘They’ve worn themselves out after all that dancing, music and painting,’ said Grimaldi.

  ‘YOUR AUNT LEFT ALL THOSE PRESENTS FOR ’EM AND THEY STILL WEREN’T SATISFIED,’ said Florence in disbelief. ‘SHE SAID THE PRESENTS WOULD KEEP ’EM HAPPY! WHAT MORE COULD THEY POSSIBLY WANT?’

  Tangine cleared his throat. ‘Attention,’ he said.

  ‘Huh?’ said Amelia.

  ‘Attention, ’ Tangine repeated, more firmly this time.

  ‘But we’ve given them attention,’ said Amelia, feeling more confused than ever.

  ‘Not in the way they really need it,’ said Tangine. ‘I suspect your Aunt Lavitora gives them lots of gifts to try to keep them happy.’

  ‘“Here’s a suitcase filled with some gifts to keep them happy”,’ Amelia quoted. ‘That’s exactly what my aunt said before she left.’

  Tangine looked sad. ‘Yes. Well, that’s why I used to act like such a spoilt sprout, remember?’

  Amelia did remember. When she had first met Tangine he was VERY different to the friendly, kind vampire-fairy she knew now. He had been bossy and spoilt and certainly didn’t know how to act like a good friend.

  ‘My dad thought that giving me presents all the time made up for the fact that he was never around when he was away searching for my mum. I had more expensive gifts than I could count,’ said Tangine. ‘But I didn’t really care about the presents. All I REALLY wanted was to spend some time with my dad and for some friends – like you guys!’

  ‘You’re right, Tangine!’ said Amelia. It was as if a lightbulb had flickered to life inside her head. ‘In fact, so were you, Grimaldi!’

  ‘Oh . . . okay?’ said a blushing Grimaldi. ‘But how was I right exactly?’

  ‘“They’ve worn themselves out after all that dancing, music and painting ” is what you said, Grimaldi,’ explained Amelia, sitting up straight.

  Grimaldi look at Amelia with a baffled expression.

  ‘Guys, I’ve realised something,’ said Amelia. She beckoned Florence, Grimaldi and Tangine to lean in closer. ‘Gerrard is always dancing or swinging around on furniture. Butler is forever banging or tapping or plucking things to make music; and Mo is always drawing or painting on anything she can draw or paint ON!’

  ‘INCLUDING OUR FACES,’ Florence grunted.

  ‘Don’t you see?’ said Amelia. ‘They each have something special . . . a unique talent. But what if nobody has ever taken the time to notice it?’

  ‘IT’S KINDA HARD TO APPRECIATE THEIR SKILLS WHEN THEY’RE RUNNIN’ RINGS AROUND US,’ said Florence.

  ‘I know,’ said Amelia. ‘I think they just need us to take an interest in what they’re doing instead of telling them off for it.’ She smiled at her friends, giving Tangine a special wink. ‘And I know exactly what we can do!’

  The clock struck midnight and the caticorns began to stir. Gerrard gave a long squeaky yawn and slowly opened his eyes.

  ‘You’re up!’ said Amelia happily.

  Gerrard looked at her, clearly confused.

  Butler and Mo stirred and opened their sleepy eyes. When they saw Amelia, they looked down at their paws guiltily.

  ‘Come on! Up we get!’ said Amelia enthusiastically. ‘We have a surprise for you!’

  Gerrard, Butler and Mo looked at each other with wrinkled, furry little foreheads.

  ‘Mew?’ they said in unison.

  Amelia whistled. Squashy and Pumpy came bundling into the unliving room wearing tiny top hats and bow ties.

  ‘Squashy and Pumpy have been rather bored,’ said Amelia, putting her hands on her hips. ‘They need entertaining ! And I thought to myself, I know JUST the trio who might be able to do that!’

  Gerrard screwed up his little face in complete bafflement.

  ‘We need someone who can DANCE!’ declared Amelia. ‘Now I wonder WHO around here can dance?’

  Butler and Mo poked at Gerrard’s head. ‘Mew, mew, mew!’ they chorused.

  Gerrard stood up meekly and slowly twirled on the spot.

  Amelia made an overly animated gasp. ‘OH MY!’ she said. ‘You can dance!’

  Gerrard nodded enthusiastically.

  ‘Well then,’ said Amelia. ‘I’d best get Florence in here, so YOU can teach her some of your BEST dance moves for the show!’

  ‘Mew?!’ the caticorns echoed.

  ‘THAT’S RIGHT,’ said Florence, prancing into the room wearing a tutu and ballet slippers. ‘THE SHOW!’

  ‘We’re going to put on a show together!’ Amelia chimed. ‘We can practise in front of Pumpy and Squashy, our very friendly judges, and then we can perform in front of Wooo and Aunt Lavitora. I bet she’ll be so excited when she sees all the amazing things her caticorns can do!’

  The caticorns were silent. They seemed stunned for a minute. Then, slowly but surely, the biggest smiles appeared on their adorable, fluffy little faces.

  CHAPTER 9

  IS SOMETHING DYING?

  ‘Okay, we have our dancers!’ said Amelia as Florence helped Gerrard pull on a ballet tutu and dance shoes. ‘But our dancers need something to dance along to . . . Perhaps some music?’

  Butler’s ears pricked up.

  ‘But I’m wondering WHO can play some beautiful music?’ said Amelia, pretending to look puzzled.

  Butler began jumping up and down on the spot.

  ‘Oh! Of course! Butler!’ said Amelia. Then she called towards the door. ‘Come on in, guys!’

  Grimaldi waltzed into the unliving room wearing a bow tie and a very TALL top hat. He was using his scythe as a conductor’s stick.

  ‘Let us make fangtastique muuuuuseeeeque!’ sang Grimaldi in an overly posh voice.

  Behind Grimaldi, making the most elaborate entrance so far, was Tangine, who’d borrowed a few things from Countess Frivoleeta’s dressing room. He was wearing a long, frilly ballgown and on his head perched a tall, purple wig. His cheeks were covered in round splodges of red blusher.

  ‘Say helloooooooooo to your favourite operrraaaaaaaaaaaa siiiiingeeeeeeeeeeer! ’ Tangine sang, rolling his r’s and over-pronouncing every syllable. ‘Butler, my darrrrrrrling,’ he trilled. ‘TEACH ME!’

  Butler giggled and meowed joyfully.

  ‘You’d better get practising!’ said Amelia. Then she leaned in and winked. ‘Especially since Tangine will need ALL the training he can get!’ Butler giggled even more.

  Mo was left sitting cross-legged in the suitcase. She adjusted her glasses and twisted her tail around her paws.

  Amelia settled herself down inside the suitcase with Mo and pulled out a sketchbook and a pencil from her skirt pocket. ‘Mo, I do believe we have a whole STAGE SET to design!’ said Amelia.

  Mo’s eyes grew wide. ‘Mew mew?’

  ‘Yep!’ said Amelia. ‘And I can’t think of anyone better to paint it than you. With skills like yours, we’re going to create the most beautiful scenery anyone ever laid eyes upon.’

  Mo squeaked happily. Amelia passed her the pencil and opened the sketchbook to a blank page. ‘Let’s get to work!’ she said.

  It wasn’t until the clock struck two in the morning that Amelia realised how absorbed they had all been. She was having so much fun with the caticorns and her friends, that she’d completely forgotten about lunch!

  ‘I think it’s time you filled your creative bellies,’ said a friendly and familiar v
oice.

  It was Wooo! He was finally fully defrosted. He was also carrying a HUGE plate full of tongue-twister sandwiches – Amelia’s favourite!

  ‘Looks like you worked things out,’ he whispered as Amelia took a sandwich for herself and another for Squashy.

  Amelia smiled. ‘Look, Wooo! Look at the beautiful stage set Mo has been painting. And can you hear the fangtastic music Butler has composed? And check out the brilliant dance moves Gerrard has been teaching Florence.’

  ‘FAAAAAAAAAAAR LAAAAR LAAAAAAAR!’

  Pumpy rolled upside down and Squashy yelped in fright.

  Wooo grimaced. ‘What was that ?’ he asked. ‘Is something dying?’

  ‘That . . .’ said Amelia in a hushed voice, ‘is Tangine.’ She raised an eyebrow. ‘Need I say more?’

  Wooo and Amelia looked at each other and burst out laughing.

  Tangine came strutting towards the sandwich platter, clip-clopping in a pair of Countess Frivoleeta’s high-heeled shoes. ‘I think I’ve got the hang of this opera malarkey,’ he said airily. ‘Another one to add to my list of never-ending talents.’

  ‘Of course,’ said Wooo, his expression unchanging. Amelia giggled. ‘But in all seriousness,’ Wooo added as Tangine sauntered away. ‘We should all take a leaf out of Tangine’s book. We all need to love ourselves a bit more. Including you, Amelia.’

  A BRIIIING! BRIIIING! rang out from the hallway. ‘I should get that,’ said Wooo. He smiled and floated away.

  Amelia grinned to herself as she watched her best friends in the entire world having fun with the caticorns. Soon she’d be able to do all of this with her new baby brother or sister! The uneasy feeling that had been nagging at her was finally starting to fade.

  Had the baby been born yet? she wondered. When would her mum and dad be home? She couldn’t wait to introduce her new baby brother or sister to her world and her friends.

  Gerrard, Butler and Mo bundled up to Amelia and began tugging at her skirt. ‘Mew, mew, mew!’ they chanted.

  ‘You’re all ready?’ Amelia asked.

  The caticorns nodded enthusiastically.

  ‘Great!’ said Amelia, feeling her tummy spin with excitement. ‘Why don’t the three of you get ready in the dining room. I’ll fetch Wooo and we can rehearse the show. Then we’ll be ready to do the real thing for Aunt Lavitora when she comes to pick you up.’

  Amelia skipped to the kitchen where Wooo was preparing some sweet and salty snotcorn for the friends to munch on.

  ‘Young Amelia! I have some good news,’ he said with a big smile. ‘That was your mum and dad on the phone. They will be back home by moonset.’

  Amelia did a little excitable dance on the spot.

  ‘Eeeeeeeeeeeee, I can’t wait !’ she cried. ‘Is Mum okay? Is it a baby boy or girl? How big is it? Does it look like me?!’ Amelia thought she might explode with all the questions she had.

  Wooo chuckled lightly. ‘Everyone’s fine and I am under strict instructions not to tell you anything more,’ he said with a wink. ‘BUT I do believe there’s a fangtastic show rehearsal about to start, and I’m sure that’ll keep your mind occupied for the rest of the night until they get home.’

  ‘Okaaay,’ said Amelia, pretending to look sad. But then she burst out laughing, hardly able to contain her joy. ‘I’m just so excited! But you’re right, Wooo, the show IS about to start. Would you like to come and watch with Squashy and Pumpy?’

  ‘I’d love that,’ said Wooo.

  When Amelia and Wooo returned to the unliving room, Pumpy and Squashy were waiting patiently on the sofa, sporting monocles for ultimate observing and judging. Florence was poised in the centre of the stage set, which had been beautifully created to look like the Meadow of Loveliness in the Kingdom of the Light. Grimaldi waved his baton at the side of the set, in preparation for some serious conducting, and Tangine hid himself behind the unliving-room curtain whilst he warmed up his singing voice. ‘EEEEEE EEEEEE OOOOOO OOOOOOOO AAAAAAAAA!’ he sang, very loudly and VERY badly.

  Amelia and Wooo snuggled up on the sofa next to the pumpkins with a big bowl of sweet and salty snotcorn.

  ‘The caticorns are just getting ready in the dining room,’ said Amelia. ‘They’ll be here in a minute!’

  Minutes passed and Florence was still poised centre stage on one foot. Alone.

  ‘THIS IS GETTING UNCOMFORTABLE,’ she said, through gritted teeth.

  ‘Maybe they’ve got stage fright?’ wondered Amelia. ‘I’ll go check if they’re okay.’

  But when Amelia entered the dining room, Gerrard’s ballet shoes were sitting neatly on the table, Butler’s homemade xylophone was perched on a chair, and Mo’s sketchbook was on the floor. There was no sign of the caticorns anywhere.

  Florence pranced into the room behind Amelia. ‘ME TOES WENT NUMB, SO I FORT I’D COME SEE WHAT WAS GOIN’ ON.’

  She hurrumphed when she saw that the caticorns weren’t there. ‘WHERE ARE THEY?’

  Something on the other side of the large window caught Amelia’s eye. Three little caticorns, pedalling away on a penny-farthing across the misty hills of Nocturnia.

  CHAPTER 10

  NOBODY EVER ASKED

  ‘THE SHOW MUST GO OOOOOOOON!’ Tangine’s melodramatic tones resounded from behind the curtain in the unliving room.

  ‘NO, YA BIG NOGGIN!’ said Florence, marching into the room. She poked at the lump in the curtain so that Tangine’s big purple wig toppled sideways into view. ‘THE SHOW AIN’T GOIN’ NOWHERE COZ THOSE LITTLE TRICKSTERS ’AVE RUN OFF AGAIN!’

  Tangine’s rosy-cheeked face suddenly appeared. ‘What?! ’ he said. ‘So, I’ve been wasting my precious voice here?’

  Amelia felt numb.

  ‘I thought they’d changed,’ she said to her friends. ‘I . . . I thought . . . I think . . .  I don’t know what I think any more! ’ She put her head in her hands in despair. ‘I AM SO CONFUSED!’

  Grimaldi put an arm around Amelia.

  Amelia suddenly felt her heart freeze over. ‘Mum and Dad are going to be home soon and so will Aunt Lavitora! We HAVE to go after the caticorns.’ She sighed. ‘No matter how naughty or how mischievous they are, they can’t be out there all on their own. They’re just little creatures at the end of the night.’

  ‘BUT ’OW ARE WE MEANT TO CATCH ’EM UP?’ asked Florence. ‘THEY’RE RIDING A PENNY-FARVING!’

  ‘Has anyone actually considered where on earth they got a penny-farthing from?’ asked Grimaldi.

  But Amelia was too distracted to listen. She wracked her brain. It felt like a curly-wurly mess and she couldn’t think straight.

  Luckily Wooo floated in.

  ‘Follow me!’ he said.

  Amelia, Florence, Grimaldi and Tangine braced themselves for the ride of a lifetime as Wooo revved up his classic motorcycle.

  ‘How come we NEVER knew you had a motorcycle ?’ said Amelia, completely and utterly shocked.

  ‘Nobody ever asked, young Amelia,’ Wooo said with a wink.

  The friends squeezed themselves into the motorcycle sidecar. Squashy and Pumpy managed to bag the main seat behind Wooo. And somehow, Wooo had enough helmets for all of them to wear.

  ‘’OW COME YOU ’AVE SO MANY ’ELMETS?’ asked Florence when he handed her a large helmet with spots all over it.

  ‘I make custom helmets as a hobby,’ said Wooo with a smile. His own helmet was shaped like a larger version of his top hat.

  Amelia wore a black helmet with a cobweb veil. Grimaldi’s looked like a gnome’s hat complete with a piece shaped like a beard that wrapped around his chin. Tangine, as usual, had picked the most extravagant and ridiculous helmet he could find. It was shaped like the tallest crown Amelia had ever set eyes upon, with flashing lights on each of the crown’s points. But what made it look even more ridiculous was the fact that Tangine wore it on TOP of his big purple wig.

  Squashy and Pumpy wore helmets that looked like their own pumpkin-shaped heads with round holes in the top for their
stalks to poke through.

  ‘Are you all ready?’ asked Wooo as the exhaust coughed and spluttered plumes of thick black smoke.

  ‘I WAS BORN READY!’ said Florence, looking determined.

  ‘I was never born ready for this,’ said Grimaldi, gripping the sides of the tiny cart.

  ‘Is this going to mess up my hair?’ asked Tangine.

  ‘Let’s go!’ said Amelia.

  The motorcycle zoomed over the hills of Nocturnia so that the cold night air whipped at Amelia’s cheeks. The occasional bat narrowly dodged the oncoming motorcycle and the occasional toad did not. Grimaldi’s die-phone was in overdrive.

  DING ! SQUISHED TOAD ALERT

  DING ! SQUISHED TOAD ALERT

  DING ! SQUISHED TOAD ALERT

  ‘Galloping gooseberries,’ Grimaldi groaned. ‘I’m going to have a squished-toad waiting list as long as my scythe at this rate.’

  Wooo weaved in and out of the cobbled streets and through Central Nocturnia Graveyard past a wobbly zombie yoga class. The motorcycle then zipped along the banks of the River Styx where Grimaldi and his family lived in a long gothic barge, then swung round tree trunk after tree trunk through the Petrified Forest.

  As they rode through the trees, Amelia swore some of the plants on the ground were moving almost as fast as they were! But the Petrified Forest was full of wild and peculiar things, and it was often best not to look too closely.

  The motorcycle picked up speed and Wooo leaned forward, concentrating hard on driving.

  ‘Wooo?! How do you know where you’re going?! ’ Amelia called over the rumbling engine and rush of wind.

  They burst out from the trees of the Petrified Forest on to a clear dusty road. Not taking his eyes off the path before them, Wooo replied, ‘I’m following the tracks of the penny-farthing wheels.’