Reforming The Heartbreaker: Prequel (Hollywood Heartbreaker #0.5)
Page 4
“Thanks.”
He bolted for the diner’s exit, stepped outside, and his gaze landed on Addison’s ramrod straight stiff back as she approached the SUV. “Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why did I let him talk me into going to the diner? He has no idea, none, about who I am and what I want,” she said, talking to herself.
His chest tightened. Hearing the tears in her voice, and false bravado filled him with a major case of self-hate. If he could turn back time and replay the entire episode, he’d do it in an instant. “Addison, wait,” he called, running toward her. He couldn’t do a retake on the past, but he sure as hell could forge a different ending to this situation. One that would prove to Addison she mattered more than he’d ever dared to admit all those years ago.
She glanced at him over her shoulder. “Get a lift from one of your friends after you finish your monster burger.” Her eyes glimmered, and her chin trembled despite the firm commanding tone in her voice. “I’ve got a mountain of files to go over when I get back to the Inn.” Addison looked away, digging into her purse until she retrieved the SUV’s keys with shaking fingers.
“Addison.” Ryder touched her shoulder. “You’re too upset to drive, let alone work.”
She pressed her forehead on the door panel. “You don’t have to be my hero, Ryder. Not like you tried to be with Tiffany.” Addison gave a heavy sigh. “I’m angry, but I’m not drunk. I have to get out of here before…”
His throat felt raw. “You aren’t angry, you’re hurt.” He couldn’t let her go. “I’m responsible for it. And I’m so sorry. So damn sorry I didn’t stand up for you after the guys razzed me about our relationship.”
Big plops of water landed on the curb beside the SUV. “I thought you were my friend.”
“I was.”
She swiped her face. “You sure didn’t act like one.”
“I was an idiot of epic proportions.” He closed the distance between them, and gently turned her to face him. God, it killed him to see the tears tracking down her cheeks. He’d put them there twice in his lifetime and he wanted to replace them with the sunny smiles she’d always had for him before he fucked things up with his tough guy act. “You helped me so much, Addison. I’ve had the career of a lifetime because of you. Do you have any idea how much that means to me?”
“I was your tutor. Nothing more.” Addison gulped in air, but still the tears ran down her face. “It’s just that I—I had fun and I mixed up the way we joked around. I made it more in my head. Stupid.”
“You’re one of the smartest people I know.” He brushed away her tears, and held her eyes with his. “You were right, Addison. I liked you. A lot. You made me laugh. You made me believe I could ace the economics final. I loved spending every minute with you. I miss that girl. More than you can possibly imagine.”
She blinked. “I was Fattie Addie. Remember? No one wanted me.”
“Sweetheart. You’re wrong,” he said. “I wanted you. But you were my agent’s daughter. Rich. Smart. Talented. Way out of my league and totally off limits.”
“Out of your league?” she asked, sniffing hard. “I was a fat, ugly nobody. And losing fifty pounds hasn’t changed who I am on the inside. I’m always one slip away from losing control… food used to be my emotional comfort zone. I can’t let it become a crutch for me. I won’t.”
“I shouldn’t have teased you with the french fry,” Ryder said.
“Not going to lie.” She dropped her gaze. “I wanted it. And the monster cheeseburger. But I know what will happen if I indulge my craving. One bite, one taste, won’t ever be enough. And I’ll become that loser. Fattie Addie.”
Her voice sounded small, vulnerable, raw. The pain behind his sternum intensified. He’d never seen her as that girl, but he’d let peer pressure stop him from standing up for her when she needed it most. “You weren’t a loser,” he said, tilting her chin up. She looked adorable with her tear stained face and the tiny hint of pink at the tip of her nose. “But I get what you mean about what will happen if you indulge in your craving. I want you. In a bad, bad way, Addison. But I’m afraid one bite, one taste won’t satisfy my craving.”
The pulse in the hollow of her throat fluttered wildly and her hazel eyes darkened. “You want me now because I’ve changed my physical appearance,” she said. “I won’t be an embarrassment to be seen with in public.”
“You’re hot. Sexy. Beyond attractive. No denying how much you turn me on. But that’s not why I want to be with you.” Ryder touched her forehead with his and caressed her cheeks. “I want you because you’re still the same person on the inside. You’re someone who cares deeply. You’ve always given 200 percent to support others no matter how tough the challenge, especially when the challenge is me.”
Ryder stroked his thumb over her full lower lip as she trembled in his arms and her breathing accelerated. He couldn’t resist the temptation of taking one small taste if only to show her how desirable she was inside and out. He lowered his mouth to hers, intending to give her a simple brush across the lips. One that danced on the edge of friendship, and skimmed around the border of his desire and stopped short of leading to more than they could handle. But when they connected, she felt so right and sweet in his arms that all of his good intentions shot into the stratosphere and flew over the Montana mountain range.
* * *
Addison tried to remind herself Ryder was off-limits, but her body refused to listen. After all, he’d once been her top fantasy man, and being with him during this past week had reawakened her long ago desire. But right now, he’d done more than recharge her rebellious hormones. Ryder had amped the charge of attraction way up with his gentle, tender confession. That endeared him to her far more than the way his clean masculine aroma swirled through her senses, intoxicating her. The softness of his mouth against hers, tentatively tasting along with the emotions he’d stirred, unraveled her ability to think clearly.
Hungry for more than a chaste kiss, Addison tilted her face to give him better access to her mouth. She coiled her arms around his neck, then opened her lips to let his tongue steal inside. She stroked over it, and he licked hers back, deepening their kiss.
Over and over, their tongues danced with each other. Tasting, teasing, and sliding together with sweet exploration, discovering each other and wanting more. So much more. Her hands tangled in his hair, and he clasped her waist, drawing her closer. Addison clung to him, losing herself in the mesmerizing connection of their mouths melding and becoming one.
Pleasure shot through her nerves until her body ached with hot need. For him. Only him. Her nipples pebbled, sending tingles to her core. Exquisite vibrations pulsed between her legs at the apex of her sex. She had never craved anything, anyone, as much as she craved Ryder.
The buzzing in her back pocket broke through the blood racing through her veins. Suddenly, she remembered where they were and what she’d signed on to do for him. Kissing him, and being kissed senseless had not been part of the bargain when she’d taken on Ryder’s PR campaign.
She wrenched her mouth from his, breathless. “We can’t do this.” Addison placed her palm on his chest to stop him. “Not now. Not when there’s so much at stake.”
He stepped back, dropping his hands to his sides, his eyes still searing hers with the heat they had ignited. “You’re right,” he said gruffly. “God forbid the press catch us doing anything.”
She shifted her gaze from his, and withdrew her phone to read the message. “Making Miracles Happen has a little boy with cancer who wants to meet his favorite Olympic star next Tuesday,” Addison said, slipping straight back into business mode. “That’ll be an excellent photo op.”
As much as she wanted him, Addison had to remember Ryder was her client. More than that, her father counted on her to show the world this man had reformed his wild, womanizing ways. She could not be one of his conquests. Well, she’d denied herself plenty of temptations during the last eight years.
Ryder would be one more indulgence she�
�d avoid.
Chapter 6
Saying no to a french fry, or a humongous bite of a monster cheeseburger, didn’t compare to denying herself Ryder, especially when Addison had a first class view of his extremely fine ass. Skin tight bicycle shorts hugged his chiseled butt to perfection while he climbed the mountain trail in his rental bike ahead of her. Addison mentally fanned herself.
“Won’t be long until we reach the lake,” Ryder called. “We’ll break to eat there, then head back.”
After getting up at the crack of o’dark early so she and Ryder could pick up their rental mountain bikes, they loaded them for their trek into the wilderness. Now she had an appetite all right.
For Ryder.
Not for the protein bars and water they’d tucked into their small back packs for the hour long bike trip. “Sounds great,” she huffed, and continued navigating her way through the forest trail.
Ugh. Her legs burned with exertion. Sure, she worked out. In a controlled environment offering regular fitness classes along with a yoga program taught by a kick butt instructor who at fifty-five had the physique of a woman half her age. Riding this trail was tougher than she’d expected—not just physically, but emotionally. He’d done more than turn her on last night, he’d touched her heart. That made her want to be with him even more.
“Wait until you see the view,” Ryder said, slowing his pace to accommodate hers.
Her bike’s wide, powerful wheels crunched over pine needles, broken branches, and rocks. Sunshine landed on the stands of purple wildflowers throughout the trees’ bases. She inhaled the sweetness of the blooms along with the earthy scent of moss and vegetation, then pedaled harder.
“How much longer?”
“Less than a mile now.”
Today’s ride came close to kicking her butt, but nothing compared to the challenge of pretending she wasn’t hyper aware of Ryder’s incredible, athletic body as they rode through the mature forest. Or the way her heart had become vulnerable to the genuine compassion in Ryder’s.
Still, she should never have kissed him back.
Gargantuan mistake.
Because nothing. Not even hours of time logged on her laptop and juggling media requests for Ryder’s personal appearances could erase the memory of his tenderness, compassion, and affection. Nor could she forget how his touch sent heat through her entire body.
The taste of him still lingered at the tip of her tongue. Hot, delicious, and all male. It crept into her dreams, and teased her with the promise of his possession. Now she couldn’t stop fantasizing about acting on the attraction, or the unspoken emotions, swirling between them. Wind whistled through the evergreen trees swaying on either side of the narrow trail. But the chill it carried from the snow encrusted peaks in the distance had zero impact on the fire flaring through her veins. That he’d backed away without pushing for more spoke volumes about him. But a tiny, naughty part of her wished Ryder had lived up to his bad boy reputation. Because right now she truly wanted to be a bad, bad girl.
Ahead of her, Ryder followed the left edge of the trail and she kept up, then gasped when their destination came into view. “You rode here every day? Trained?” she asked, awed by the expanse of the ultramarine lake and the surrounding verdant meadows with their pops of colorful flowers.
“Yes.” Ryder braked and eased one clipped foot out of the pedal, then braced the bike with his thighs. “John widened the trail, and we added the drops I used for practice before I got picked up by the university’s team.”
“It’s like a postcard.” Addison tried to stop next to him, but the forest’s wet leaves made her tires slide and she slipped into his side, nearly toppling them over. “Sorry. Looks like I’ll never get rid of my inner klutz.”
He wrapped his arm around her, then righted her and the bike. “I’ve seen a ton of pro bikers wipe out here, myself included,” he said, still holding her waist.
His hand seemed to sear her, brand her as his. A sudden flush spread from her center outward and a shudder trembled through her. Addison tried to remind herself that Ryder had reacted like any other guy. But her body refused to hear her strict stay-in-control command. And how could she blame it? Ryder’s touch felt so damned good.
Out here, in the wilderness, without the pressure to spin his career back into PR heaven, Addison wondered how bad acting on her desire would be. She’d finally put the fantasies she’d spun about him to rest, especially when she knew Ryder had a genuinely good soul. One she yearned to connect with even though she couldn’t rely on it to last forever. Not with his career and future at stake. But afterward, she’d have a precious, amazing secret which made the idea of testing Ryder’s admission about wanting her that way more tantalizing.
* * *
Addison leaned against Ryder, the metal of their bikes clanging and echoing in the vast empty space, and rested her head on his shoulder. “Thank you for bringing me here,” she said.
Holding Addison, Ryder could stay in this spot and overlook the vista of the lake, surrounding meadows, and the snow capped mountain peaks in the distance for an eternity. “Worth the ride, right?” he asked, then tightened his hold and pulled her a little closer. She smelled good, her unique floral scent mingling perfectly with the tang of pine needles and sunshine that haloed around them.
“Absolutely.” She snaked her arm around his waist, and ran her palm over his torso. “You bring all your dates here when you were living in Saddle Creek?”
Her voice had a husky tone, seductive as sin, and a zing of electricity charged into his groin, making his cock twitch. If he were reading the signals right, Addison had done an about face on her do-not-touch-me edict. “Nope. You’re it,” he said after he doused his lust with a huge dose of ice.
Ryder had never brought another woman to his practice trail. But he’d wanted to share this place with Addison. And, if he was honest with himself, he’d thought about it long ago when they’d bent their heads over his reams of study sheets. The urge to connect with her at a visceral, trusting level of friendship resurrected from the minute he’d seen her walking across the hospital’s parking lot a week ago.
“Figured bringing you here might help you with your PR campaign,” he said. “You could use my background to show the public how I overcame all the odds blah blah blah…you’re the genius. I trust you to take what you learn about me and use it well.”
He’d become a man here, and had learned lessons to last a lifetime. If anyone deserved to know the real Ryder and where he came from—at least this part of his life—it was Addison. She’d never treated him like a spoiled athlete when she’d tutored him. She’d never made him feel like a jock without brains when he had trouble understanding economics concepts. She’d never asked anything of him other than to be her friend.
“Good idea.”
Today he’d be that friend. One she could rely on, especially after what she’d revealed to him last night. After their emotionally charged moment, while she’d been hiding in her adjacent room at the Inn, Ryder had called in a lot of favors to make today’s trail ride mean a lot more than a push against nature.
He hadn’t brought Addison to the lakeside to seduce her, but… her hand continued to trace circles up and down the side of his torso. Holy. Fuck. All.
“You think you can ride another quarter mile?” he asked through a constricted throat while pointing toward the canvas gazebo he’d arranged to have erected. “I ordered in lunch.”
She lifted her head, and her hand stopped torturing him with its sexy touches. “I don’t understand. How on earth did you make this happen all the way out in the middle of nowhere?”
He shot her a look through his wraparound sunglasses, grateful for their cover because he doubted he could hide the heat she’d ignited. “You have your ways of getting things done, I have mine.” Money, connections, and his sister Samantha’s helicopter pilot’s license had been weapons in his arsenal to make things right between him and Addison. He shot her his best commercial
stock grin. “You still want protein bars and water, or will you let me make up for not feeding you properly last night?”
“Define properly.”
“The best clean eating restaurant in Los Angeles catered the meal.”
Addison touched his face, then drew it toward her. She brushed her mouth over his—a brief, soft sensation until the tip of her tongue licked his lower lip.
“Then I’m all in,” she said when she pulled away and spoke in a slow, sensual, and beyond sexy tone before pushing off and riding ahead of him.
He remained rooted where they’d stopped, unable to take his eyes off her while trying to control the fire pulsing throughout his veins, and thundering in his ears. His lips tingled, and his cock had a life of its own as it strained against the fabric of his shorts.
No way could he ride in this condition—he channeled every mental way he had to kill his hard-on, but hell. How could he kill it when his sex-starved brain couldn’t stop zoning in on her sweet, round behind and those long, luscious legs? She was hot in her skin tight spandex bike shorts, and figure hugging jersey. Plus, she was fun, unreserved, and playful. He liked her playful, flirtatious side a lot. Maybe too much.
Something had shifted between last night’s all-business no-way-would-she-act-on-it attraction to Addison’s sexy, come-on-to-him temptation today. He didn’t know why, but right now? Ryder didn’t dare analyze the situation. Not when his entire body, brain, and heart had unified into following up on that challenge.
Chapter 7
“Don’t worry,” Addison said when Ryder finally arrived at the picnic site he’d conjured into being with a flick of his mogul wand. “I won’t let it out that I whupped America’s Olympic Gold champion in a mountain bike contest.” She’d pulled off her helmet and removed her cycling shoes before lounging on the luxurious blankets and pillows.
“Wouldn’t be good for our PR campaign.” Ryder took his time dismounting his bike, leaned it on one of the gazebo’s poles, and then moved into the shelter of the brightly colored canvas. “You check out the basket?”