Hate Struck: (Maddison High School Book 1)

by Nikki Ashton

  23

  Sarah

  Walking into school on Monday morning, it was pretty clear that everyone had heard what had happened to Adam and I. Groups of kids were huddled together whispering and breaking off their conversations as I approached, some even took pictures of me on their phones.

  “At least this means they’ve forgotten the crap about my dad,” I muttered to Alannah as we walked into our French class. “Or maybe the bitter irony of it will fire up the gossip even more.”

  “I can’t believe how calm you are.” She looked at me warily as we dropped our books on the desk. “I thought you’d be freaking out and maybe not even come to school today.”

  I’d called Alannah to tell her what had happened, and she’d been the one to freak out. When I mentioned that it had been Adam who held me together, I thought she may have passed out, she went so quiet. Finally, she had cleared her throat and said, ‘Just don’t expect him to continue being a decent person, Sarah, just because he was when faced with death’. I didn’t tell her about our phone conversation in the early hours of the morning. I didn’t want a lecture from her, but I also didn’t want to have to tell her what we talked about.

  Adam and I had agreed they’d be our secrets, but I couldn’t say I wasn’t worried that Alannah was right, and he’d go back to being Mr Shithead and tell everyone everything I’d told him in confidence. I was second guessing my decision and just hoped I wasn’t wrong about him.

  “I’m fine,” I told Alannah.

  I didn’t tell her that Mum had called Eleanor, my therapist, and insisted on an immediate session via Skype, or that the night in the store hadn’t been as bad as being raped by one of my teachers because I’d had Adam with me.

  “Are you sure?” she asked, her tone soft and caring. “It must have brought back so many memories.”

  “It was hard,” I admitted. “And I was so scared at the time, but I don’t know, Alannah, I kind of feel…” I paused as I tried to find the words to convey how I felt. “At peace I guess.”

  “At peace?” She pushed her glasses up and wrinkled her nose. “How?”

  I shrugged. “I don’t know. It kind of feels like it helped to close a chapter in my life. Like it was the end of the bad stuff.”

  Alannah sat down in her chair and looked down at the desk. She didn’t understand me, I knew that, but I couldn’t tell her that part of my cleansing had come from talking of my rape and suicide attempt to Adam. It felt like ten weights had been lifted from my shoulders, not just one.

  “Not going to lie, Sarah,” Alannah said eventually. “I don’t get how you’re not screaming in a corner and refusing to come out of your room, ever, but if you feel okay then I’m glad. You’d tell me, right, if you ever feel the need to scream in that corner?”

  “Yes, Alannah, I promise.”

  I gave her a smile and felt glad that she’d been the one asked to take care of me, because she was becoming a really good friend.

  I’d been looking out for Adam all morning but hadn’t seen either him or his mates. When I sat down for lunch with Alannah and Amber and my heart missed at least three beats as he walked into the dining room it shocked me. I hadn’t realised how much of an affect he was starting to have one me. The fact that he looked hot didn’t help. He sauntered in wearing his usual jeans and t-shirt, but today he was wearing a pair of Adidas Gazelle’s and a baseball cap which he had pulled down low over his brows.

  “Does he think he’s a damn celebrity or something?” Amber asked with a snort of laughter. “Hiding his face from the paparazzi.”

  If I had to bet on it, I’d say he’d worn it to make himself look even sexier because of all the attention he’d be bound to get today; but I chose to keep quiet. If Alannah didn’t understand how much Adam had helped me that night, Amber certainly wouldn’t.

  As the four of them approached our table, I felt my legs begin to shake and reached under my jumper for my wrist. I was nervous about how Adam would be with me, whether he’d give me that cocky smirk of his and then announce to everyone that he wanted to tell them my darkest secrets.

  You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

  You make-

  Adam looked up at me and when his eyes caught mine, he pushed up the peak of his cap and gave me the softest smile. It was filled with light and energy and made me feel hopeful that maybe our friendship would help us both in some way.

  When he paused at our table, I held my breath and waited to have my hopes decimated by him.

  “Hey, Sarah, how you feeling?” he asked, concern reflected from his eyes.

  I gasped, ever hopeful and always scared.

  “I’m fine, you?”

  He shrugged, pulled his cap off, ruffled his hair and then pushed it back on again. “Okay.”

  His gaze stayed pinned to mine and I knew he was trying to tell me so much without having to say the words. He was there for me, he’d had another nightmare, he wasn’t going to let the man who’d almost killed us win, and more importantly my secrets were safe with him.

  “Are we getting lunch or not?” Ellis groaned. “I’m fucking starving.”

  Adam rolled his eyes and turned to him. “Yeah, just give me a second.”

  “Oh shit. Do we have to play nice with her now you’ve bonded over a gun pointed at your heads,” Kirk said with a loud laugh.

  Adam rounded on him. “Shut the fuck up, you insensitive dick. Do you have any idea what we went through?”

  The whole of the dining room went silent as Adam grabbed hold of Kirk’s shirt.

  “I wonder why I’m friends with you sometimes.” Adam got right in Kirk’s face. “You’re nothing but a prick.”

  “It was just a fucking joke.” Kirk reared back from Adam. “Since when can’t you take a joke?”

  “Come on lads,” Tyler said as he pulled them apart. “Both of you stop acting like idiots and let’s get some lunch.”

  Adam let go of Kirk’s t-shirt and took a step back. “I’ll come in a minute, and I’m sitting here.”

  Without looking at either me, Alannah or Amber he pulled a stool from under the table and sat down.

  “Looks like we have a new table, lads.” Ellis slapped Kirk’s back. “So, let’s grab food before I eat your fucking big fat head.”

  “You girls don’t mind if we sit here, do you?” Adam looked around at the silent, staring faces in the dining room and then raised a questioning brow at a boy and a girl on the next table. When they went back to their food and everyone else around us started up talking again, he turned back to us and flashed me a smile.

  “So, you’ve really been okay?” he asked.

  I nodded and swallowed the huge lump in my throat. “Yeah, fine. What about you?”

  “Good, good. Roger organized some therapy sessions for me, but I’m not sure I need them.”

  I placed my hand over his and our eyes met as something unspoken passed between us. The air was highly charged, and I had a desire to sit there all day just feeling the warmth of his skin.

  “I think you should,” I said on a swallow. “Go to the therapy session. You have no idea how something like that can affect you. I should know.”

  He leaned closer to me and whispered in my ear. “I meant what I said, Sarah, I won’t tell anyone anything at all about what we talked about.”

  He pulled his cap off again and put it on the table. His hair hung in his eyes, which made him look boyish and cute and my heart flipped over.

  Licking his lips, he gave me a shy smile and just as I began to feel excitement about what he was going to say, two trays landed on the table.

  “Got you something for lunch,” Kirk said sullenly. “Peace offering.”

  Adam looked up at him and then at the tray with a chicken salad and an apple on it. “Thanks, but you need to apologise to Sarah too.”

  “Oh my God,” Alannah whispered. “What the hell have you done with the real Adam Hudson?”

  I gave her wide eyes and turned to Kirk. “It’s
okay. You don’t need to.”

  He shook his head and pushed a bowl toward me. “Yeah, I do, so I got you a pudding.”

  “What is it?” I wasn’t a lover of desserts and this looked just like a stodgy brown blob in the middle of custard.

  “Jam roly poly, apparently,” Kirk replied with a grimace. “Not for me, but I figured you might like it.”

  I actually didn’t like the look of it, but he’d been good enough to apologise, so I picked it up from the tray and placed in front of me.

  “Seriously,” Alannah said with a frown. “Am I in a coma and dreaming all of this?”

  “No,” Amber replied. “It’s all weirdly real.”

  “You can go and sit somewhere else,” Adam offered as he picked up his knife and fork.

  “We were here first.” Alannah sounded tentative, but she looked him directly in the eye.

  “And why would that stop me from making you move?” he threw back.

  I inhaled sharply and looked at Adam who had turned to cutting up his chicken. The disappointment I felt at him being his usual self, after everything we’d said to each other, felt like a lead weight had been dropped into the pit of my stomach. He would never change, and I was stupid to even think he could.

  I turned to Alannah to suggest we did in fact separate ourselves from them, when Adam stopped me in my tracks.

  “I’m messing with you, Alannah. I just decided to stop being a dick around you girls. Almost getting shot kind of a changes a person.”

  He’d said everything he’d wanted to and was ever going to say in one sentence and his ego insisted that should be enough of an explanation. Apparently, he was right, it was perfectly sufficient, because Alannah silently picked up her spoon and began to eat her fruit salad.

  Not for Amber it seemed.

  “Seriously,” Amber hissed. “That’s all we get as explanation for you turning from a dick to a normal human being?”

  Adam shrugged. “Not sure what else I can say.”

  “Well what about an apology for one.” Amber’s brown eyes were sparkling with anger as she leaned across the table closer to Adam. “You made my life a misery, and then just because you almost got a bullet to the head, we’re supposed to forgive you? Oh, and FYI the fact you didn’t get shot dead is most unfortunate.”

  “Amber.” Alannah gasped at the same time as she gripped my forearm. “You can’t say things like that.”

  I was so shocked at Amber’s comment I couldn’t speak. I sat watching her with my mouth open. It hadn’t even registered with me about my dad until Alannah had almost cut the blood supply off in my arm—I’d just been shocked because it was such a vile thing to say to anybody.

  Adam looked over at me with his hand gripped tightly onto his fork and eyed me warily. I gave him an imperceptible nod and let out a long breath and turned to Alannah.

  “It’s okay,” I whispered to her. “She didn’t know.”

  “Of course, she knew,” Kirk said with a smirk. “She got the same memo as everyone else.”

  “Kirk,” Adam growled. “Why don’t you keep your fucking mouth shut.”

  “What? I haven’t said anything.” He said the words but the way he narrowed his eyes on Adam told me he knew exactly what he’d said and the fury burning in Adam’s eyes told me he knew too.

  “Move over,” Ellis said as he and Tyler arrived at the table with their lunches.

  Kirk moved on to the next stool along, so he was opposite to Adam.

  “I’m sorry, okay.”

  Adam didn’t respond but the situation thankfully seemed to be diffused as he went back to his lunch and Amber pulled out her Kindle and with a sigh began reading it.

  Alannah leaned closer to whisper into my ear. “This is so weird you have to admit.”

  I looked around the collection of people at the table and nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.”

  Not sure what else to do, I reached for my pudding and stuck a spoon in, scooping up some of the stodgy blob along with some custard.

  When I put it into my mouth at first it didn’t taste too bad, but as I started to chew it just tasted like fatty dough. I looked over at Kirk who was watching me with a smile, and I didn’t want to appear rude after he’d got it for me, so nodded and smiled.

  “Hmm, lovely.”

  Kirk continued staring as I ate two more spoonful’s and it struck me as odd that he was so interested in what I thought of his peace offering, but when I felt the itch begin at the back of my throat, I knew exactly what he’d done.

  I threw the spoon down and clutched at my throat. “What is it Kirk?” I croaked already knowing the answer.

  Adam looked up and dropped his cutlery, reaching across the table for me. “Sarah.” His voice rose. “What’s wrong? You don’t look right.”

  I pointed at the dessert. “I-I… banana… allergic.”

  Second by second my throat closed a little more and I struggled to drag out a breath. I frantically felt around for my backpack, but everything got fuzzy too quick and started swimming in front of my eyes.

  “Kirk, what the fuck is it?” Adam yelled as he knocked his stool over and scrambled over the table, pushing trays of food out of the way.

  “What the-.” Tyler was just about to spear a tomato with his fork when it disappeared.

  “P-p-p.” I clutched at my throat.

  “Oh my God,” Alannah screamed. “What’s wrong with her?”

  Everything pitched black; voices became distant echoes as it got harder and harder to breath.

  I was about to die.

  24

  Adam

  “Kirk you fucking idiot, what did you do?” I screamed at my friend whose face had morphed from smirking to panic.

  “I didn’t know,” he cried. “I just thought her throat got itchy.”

  “Alannah, where does she keep her pen thing?” My eyes darted between her and Sarah as I pushed out ragged breaths.

  Alannah’s hands were gripping her hair. “I don’t know what you mean.”

  “She’s allergic. Tell me now, what the fuck it is?” I pointed at the pudding while looking around for Sarah’s backpack. Kirk had said her record stated she carried it everywhere.

  “Sarah, where is it? Can you tell me?” I gripped her face in my hands and begged her to help me save her.

  “It’s banana custard.” Kirk sounded scared and so he fucking should, because this was the most fucking stupid thing he’d ever done.

  “What are you staring at?” Ellis yelled at the groups of students who had stopped eating and were gathered around watching. “Someone ring 9-9-9, or at least get a teacher for fuck’s sake.”

  “EpiPen,” Amber cried. “She needs an EpiPen, my brother has one for his nut allergy.”

  “Fuck.” I picked up Sarah’s backpack, unzipped it and emptied everything onto the table. Pens, notebooks, rulers, even tampons rolled out. “Amber what the fuck am I looking for?”

  My eyes went back to Sarah whose face was going a shade of deep red, her lips were swelling, and her eyes were closing as she swayed in her seat.

  “It looks like a huge needle.” Amber quickly sifted through Sarah’s things. “It’ll have a big yellow sticker on it. Like a warning sign.”

  “Where the fuck is it.” I snatched up the backpack and looked inside. There was a zip pocket, but it wasn’t in there. I felt all over the bag with my fingers, hoping desperately that I’d find the fucking pen. Then, thank fuck, I felt it in a side pocket.

  “Amber what do I do?” I asked frantically.

  “Give it to me, I’ll do it.”

  She held her hand out for the pen, but I shook my head. “Just tell me what to do.” I wanted to be the one who helped her, I didn’t trust anyone else. It had to be me because if I didn’t have the pen in my hand, I’d smash Kirk’s face in for doing this.

  “Snap the cap off, hold her leg still, make a fist around the pen and then stab her outer thigh and count to ten.” Amber barked the instructions at me as
one of the lunchtime staff came running over with Mr Raymond.

  “Adam what’s happened?” Mr Raymond rushed to my side. “You know what you’re doing?”

  I blew out a breath, nodded and then stabbed Sarah in the leg and counted to ten.

  “Did it click?” Amber cried.

  I nodded and pulled the pen out and held it in front of me like it was some sort of lethal weapon. “What do I do with it?”

  Amber handed me the storage case. “Put it back in, it’ll need to go to hospital with her.”

  “Well done.” Mr Raymond sighed and squeezed my shoulder. “Ambulance should be here soon.”

  All our eyes went to Sarah who was already breathing much easier, her face losing the beetroot red colour too.

  “You okay?” I ran a hand down her hair.

  She nodded and her eyes went to the pudding and then to Kirk before she fell against my chest.

  “Sarah.” Mr Raymond knelt down next to her chair and placed a hand on her shoulder. He didn’t notice her flinch, but I felt it and held her closer to me.

  “I’m going to get Miss George to come in the ambulance with you, okay?”

  Sarah nodded and glanced up at Miss George with relief in her eyes. I could have kissed Mr Raymond for suggesting it.

  As I sat with Sarah in my arms, I saw Kirk move in my periphery. He was going to bolt because he knew what he’d done, but before I could say anything, Ellis shoved him back into his seat and then gave me a nod. My best friend knew exactly what I would need when this was over.

  A couple of minutes later and Miss George appeared with two paramedics. They dropped their bags at my feet and one of them gave me a smile while the other gently pulled Sarah away from me.

  “Well done,” the older of the medics said to me. “You probably saved her life.”

  I let out a huge breath of air and felt my scalp prickle as I thought about how twice in a matter of days, I’d nearly lost her. I knew she wasn’t mine to lose, not yet, but I felt like she could be one day.