Into the Blue

by Robin Huber

  “It’s like the water in the lagoon.”

  He smiles and nods. “I thought so too.”

  I walk to the living room, passing a large wooden table that’s weathered and worn. It’s surrounded by cloth-covered chairs that contrast the natural beauty of the wood. In the middle of the living room, an oversized gray sectional sofa surrounds a glass-topped driftwood coffee table. I step out of my sandals onto the amber-colored rug beneath it, feeling the looped yarn under my bare feet. I bend over and touch the soft knotted wood that holds the glass.

  “This is incredible, Kellan.” The house is elegant, but casual, something that I can definitely see us living comfortably in.

  “Come see the backyard,” he says, leading me through the large glass pocket doors that disappear into the wall.

  I follow him outside onto the stone patio, noticing the fire pit in the far corner, and I think of the bonfires we had on the island. The landscaping is as beautiful, if not more elaborate than, the front yard. Banana trees, bird of paradise, and hibiscus plants surround the edges of the lush green yard, and several palm trees give way to a view of the Pacific Ocean. I stand still, struck by the beauty of the property, lost in thought, imagining us living here, imagining a little dark-haired, blue-eyed boy running around in this yard.

  Kellan wraps his arms around me and drops his cheek to mine. “I was thinking this would be the perfect place for us to get married. Just the two of us, in our backyard, beside the ocean.”

  I exhale a quiet breath. “Kellan, the house is beautiful and this view is breathtaking.” He just landed a new body armor contract with the military, but... “Can we afford it?”

  “With the settlement money, we can. And there will still be enough left over to pay for med school. If you still want to go back after the baby’s born.”

  I pull my eyebrows together and nod. “I do. Definitely. I think.” I shake my head uncertainly. “But do you really want to use Marc’s money?”

  “Makayla, that money was given to us so that our life could be a little easier than the last year was. So that our baby’s life could be easier. It’s not Marc’s money, it’s ours.”

  “The last year wasn’t all bad.”

  “No, it wasn’t.” He drops his hands to my tummy. “Do you think he’ll like it?”

  I turn around in his arms and look up at him. “What kid wouldn’t want to have the ocean in their backyard?”

  “So, is that a yes?”

  “It’s a yes.”

  He smiles and pulls me to the edge of the yard where the grass turns to sand. “Our own beach.” My eyes follow the curve of the shore and I only see one other house that looks like it’s a half mile away. “We can swim, we can surf, we can do other things,” he says suggestively.

  I smile, thinking of the possibilities. “Well, now I’m sold,” I say, tackling him to the sand, kissing him excitedly.

  He laughs against my mouth. “Don’t you want to see the rest of the house? You didn’t get to see the bedrooms.”

  I sit up and put my hands on his chest. “Yes, I do. But as soon as it’s ours, I want you right here on our beach, out there in our little piece of the ocean, and in every single room of this amazing house.”

  He shows me his bright white smile and the corners of his blue eyes crinkle. “That’s a deal, baby.” He pulls me up and we shake the sand off our clothes, and head back inside.

  Kellan shows me the rest of the rooms, which are all furnished and decorated in the same coastal style as the rest of the house—casual, but elegant, warm colors contrasting cool. I love everything about this house, especially the dark, carved-wood four-poster bed in the master bedroom. It has white sheers that hang all the way to the floor. I think I’m ready to move in today.

  * * *

  My eyes flutter open to the soft morning light that’s illuminating the sheers on our giant four-poster bed. It’s early, but I can see sparkles of light on the blue horizon through the open plantation shutters that cover the windows. I roll over awkwardly in my new body. I’m seven months pregnant now and my belly is getting bigger by the day.

  Kellan pushes my shirt up and his fingers splay over my stomach as he nuzzles my neck. “How did you guys sleep last night?”

  “Really good, actually.” I’m finally starting to get through the night without nightmares. I roll onto my back, lifting Kellan’s hand with my rising stomach, and there’s a strong kick directly under his palm. “Did you feel that?”

  He’s smiling, so I know that he did. “Yeah, I felt it.” He drops his head and kisses the spot on my stomach. “Good morning to you too,” he says, speaking to our baby, and my heart swells. He moves his mouth to my growing scar and kisses it slowly and intentionally, before dragging his lips down to my hip.

  “Kellan,” I whisper, but I don’t want him to stop...and he doesn’t.

  He tugs my panties down my legs and slowly kisses up my thigh, pushing my legs apart as he makes his way to the most sensitive part of my body, and his tongue caresses me gently, purposely, moving over the places that he knows so well. I claw the sheets and somehow manage to arch my back off the bed. I’m so hyper-sensitive to him—more so than normal. I never knew that could be a side effect of pregnancy, but it’s one I will miss after the baby comes. He continues to worship me, until I’m moaning into a pillow.

  I lie panting beneath him, wanting more. I grab the edges of my shirt and tug it off over my head, and even though I’m swollen with pregnancy, the way that he’s gazing down at my naked body makes me feel sexy.

  “You’re so beautiful,” he says reverently, tracing his fingers around the curves of my swollen breasts and down the sides of my stomach. “I can’t wait to marry you today.”

  I smile at him. “I can’t wait to marry you either.”

  He kisses me deeply, pushing his tongue into my mouth, and I moan desperately into his.

  “Make love to me, Kellan.”

  He’s naked a few seconds later, kneeling between my legs. He wraps his hands around my thighs and pulls my hips to his, leaving me lying on my back as he leans forward and slowly pushes into me. I shudder as he takes his time filling me, and a soft moan escapes my lips when he leans back, stroking the hidden spot inside me.

  “Makayla,” he breathes, closing his eyes as he rocks into me again. When he opens them, I’m staring up at the brightest blue ocean. His cheeks are flushed under the light scruff that covers them and surrounds his etched lips and jaw, which is clenched tight. His dark hair is tousled over his forehead and his tan skin is stretched across his strong muscles, which are softened by the morning light that’s filling our room. His arms flex as he holds my hips to his and his stomach ripples with each intentional, slow thrust. He’s trying to be gentle, which is fine with me. Every time that he slides out of me, he strokes that magic spot and winds me up tighter.

  He leans forward and cups my face, pushing his fingers into my hair as he kisses me. Then he trails his fingers down my neck and over my swollen breasts, shattering me into a million pieces when he caresses my nipple. He moves a little faster, groaning against my mouth as I find my way back to him, and then he stills inside me.

  He lies next to me with his head on my breast, and I run my fingers through his hair. After a few seconds, I sit up and rub my hands over his back.

  “Mmm,” he murmurs, letting his head find a comfortable place between his folded arms.

  I proceed to give him a ten minute massage, which is all I can manage before my hands begin to ache from squeezing his thick muscles. But he’s more relaxed than I’ve ever seen him. In fact, I think that he’s fallen back asleep. I smile and kiss the corner of his mouth, then I get up and head for the shower.

  * * *

  I stand in front of my bathroom mirror removing large rollers from my hair. It falls in big loopy waves down my back. I loosely pin several pieces off my face, ignoring the butterflies that have arrived for our big day. I’m not nervous about the ceremony, especially since it wil
l just be the two of us, but I’m overwhelmed with so many different emotions. Joy, sadness, excitement...hope.

  There’s a knock at the door, but I don’t answer. I don’t want Kellan to see me before the minister gets here. Maybe it’s a senseless notion, seeing as how nothing about our relationship has been traditional, but something about adhering to the longstanding marital custom feels right.

  “Makayla?” he calls through the closed door.

  “Yes?”

  “I want to give you something. Can you open the door just a little? I won’t look, I promise.”

  “Okay.” I turn around and reach for the handle with my back to the door so that I don’t risk seeing him either. I crack it open just an inch and feel his long fingers reaching for my hand. When he finds it, he laces his fingers with mine.

  “Hi,” he says from the other side of the door, and I smile softly.

  “Hi.”

  “Open your hand.”

  I open my fingers and he places a small wrapped box in my palm. I hold it up in front of me. “What is this?” I ask, smiling.

  “Open it.”

  I slip my finger under the silver wrapping paper, removing it from the little black box, and tears fill my eyes when I see what’s inside. A pearl bracelet. My pearls. All strung together on a delicate gold chain with the black pearl in the middle and the two sides joined together with a little diamond clasp. “Kellan,” I breathe, “it’s beautiful.”

  “I would give you all the pearls in the ocean if I could,” he says quietly from the other side of the door, and I nod over silent tears. “I’ll meet you outside,” he says, and I hear the smile in his voice. “Don’t make me wait.”

  “Okay.”

  I clasp the precious bracelet around my wrist and step into my simple white organza wedding dress that spills onto the floor and sweeps over my shoulders with spaghetti straps that follow the open back down to my waist. I grab my bouquet of white lilies and hydrangeas and make my way through the house on bare feet, until I reach the patio. When I step outside, I see the minister who is going to marry us. He’s standing in front of a floral arbor that overlooks the ocean near the edge of the lawn where the grass turns to sand. And I hear music. We planned a five minute ceremony, we didn’t plan music, but I recognize the slow strumming guitar and the beautiful, familiar voice that accompanies it, playing through the outside speakers. Gus.

  I don’t have long to ponder how Kellan got a recording of him. When he steps into view my heart nearly stops. He’s wearing sand-colored linen pants and a white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up. He’s barefoot, standing in front of a painted sky, and the ocean is glistening under the setting sun behind him. A lump forms in my throat when he looks at me and I see the emotion on his face.

  I force my wobbly legs to move and I step onto the grass as the beautiful slow lyrics to Unchained Melody carry me across the lawn, filling me with memories of the island.

  As I close the space between us, Kellan reaches for my hand and mouths, So beautiful.

  The minister begins the ceremony and hands me Kellan’s wedding band.

  I take it from him and slide it onto Kellan’s finger, repeating after him, “Kellan, I give you this ring as a symbol of my deepest love, my unending devotion, my eternal faith, and my everlasting fidelity.”

  Kellan takes my wedding band from the minister and slides it onto my finger. “Makayla, I give you this ring as a symbol of my deepest love, my unending devotion, my eternal faith, and my everlasting fidelity.”

  “Makayla, do you take Kellan to be your husband?”

  I nod over the tears in my eyes. “I do.”

  “Kellan, do you take Makayla to be your wife?”

  He smiles. “I do.”

  “By the power vested in me, I pronounce you husband and wife. Kellan, you may kiss your bride.”

  Kellan takes my face in his hands and places the softest, most gratifying kiss on my lips, sealing our vows. “I love you, Makayla.”

  “I love you, Kellan.”

  * * *

  The sun is almost below the horizon now and the indigo sky is glowing orange over the ocean. The twinkle lights have come on and are glowing over the patio.

  “Come take a walk with me,” Kellan says quietly against my ear.

  “Okay.” I smile and take his hand.

  He leads me down to the beach and I gasp when I step into the soft sand and see glowing mason jars everywhere. Each one is tucked down into the sand, holding a small white candle. The tiny flames flicker in the gentle breeze.

  “What is this?” I ask, smiling.

  He pulls me into the middle of the illuminated circle and picks up a dark mason jar from the sand. He holds it between us and I notice there’s a lid on it. I eye the jar curiously and see something moving inside it. I look closer and see a butterfly slowly moving its wings.

  “The ancient Greek word for butterfly is soul. Did you know that?”

  I shake my head and whisper, “No.”

  “Psyche, which literally translates to soul, was a mortal princess who fell in love with Eros, the Greek god of love.” He narrows his eyes. “Some call him Cupid.”

  I smile as I listen.

  “In Greek mythology, Psyche is represented in the form of a butterfly and she is forever linked with love as she and Eros shared a passionate bond, both hopelessly in love with each other for all of eternity. They were soul mates.” He runs his thumb over my cheek. “You’re my soul mate, Makayla.”

  I swallow my emotion and nod. “Yes.”

  He unscrews the lid and turns the jar on its side, coaxing the butterfly to the rim. Its delicate legs slowly carry it to the opening of the jar, where it closes and opens its wings a few times, before fluttering into the air above us and disappearing into the night sky.

  Kellan reaches for my face and vows, “As long as there is air in my lungs, I will love you, Makayla. Forever. In this life and the next.”

  “And beyond that,” I whisper.

  Chapter 25

  Makayla

  I wade into the blue ocean and submerge my very pregnant body beneath the surface, reveling in the feeling. I’m nearly full term now—thirty-eight weeks to be exact—and I really don’t think I can get any bigger. The ocean is my sanctuary. It’s the one place that I don’t feel like I’m carrying around a twenty-five pound bowling ball. The baby likes it too. Whenever I’m under the water, he mellows out.

  I float on my back and look at my swollen stomach sticking up out of the water. It’s the size of a beach ball. I stare up at the cloudless blue sky and close my eyes, feeling the heat of the bright Hawaiian sun on my skin as the calm waves lull me. I’m so tired. If it weren’t for my survival instincts, I’d fall asleep right here in the ocean. It’s truly the only place that I’m comfortable these days.

  I think of Carlita and wonder if this is how she felt. Probably. Like every pregnant woman before her. Except, unlike every pregnant woman, her baby was upside down when she went into labor. I wonder if she understood how dangerous that was for her and her baby. Or how lucky she was that Dr. H and Adam were able to turn him. I’m so thankful my baby is already head down. And that Mia and Adam will be here when I deliver. Mia took it upon herself to get certified as a Doula just for the event. I think she got concerned when I told her I wanted an at home water birth. But after seeing Carlita give birth on the island, I knew I didn’t want to give birth in a sterile hospital setting with doctors and nurses I don’t know. In fact, I’m thinking of becoming a midwife and skipping the traditional medicine route altogether.

  I open my eyes and see Kellan walking toward the water as my feet find the ocean floor. He pulls his shirt off over his head and drops it on the sand, and I sigh at the sight of my beautiful husband—at the silhouette of his square shoulders and his long muscular arms and matching long legs.

  He wades into the water and runs his wet hands through his dark hair, showing me all the flexing muscles in his tan torso. He smiles when h
e reaches me. “Hey.”

  “Hey,” I say, squinting up at him.

  “I was watching you from the house.” He pulls my face to his and kisses me slowly. “Like a goddess in the sea.”

  A sharp laugh escapes me. “Are you sure you didn’t see a mermaid or something?”

  “Not unless you grew a tail.”

  “Nope, just a tiny human, who has completely taken over my body,” I whimper. “Look at me. I’m as big as a house.”

  The corners of his mouth turn up and he places his hands on either side of my very round stomach. “You’re perfect. And you’ve kept our baby safe for the last nine months without a single complaint. You’re amazing.”

  The baby kicks hard against his hand. “Whoa!”

  “Am I allowed to complain now?” I grit through my teeth, grimacing from the kick. “I think he may have just broken a rib.”

  “Are you okay?” he asks seriously.

  “Yes, I was being dramatic. I’m fine. But it’s really cute that you’re concerned.”

  His face softens. “I don’t like seeing you in pain. I don’t know how I’m going to handle seeing you give birth.”

  “Why do you think I wanted Adam here?”

  “To make sure the baby arrives safely?”

  “To make sure you don’t lose it before he or she gets here.” I laugh. “I’ll likely be in labor for hours. And it’s going to hurt. A lot. I’m prepared for the pain. But you should prepare too.”

  “I’m not sure I could ever fully prepare for that. But I’ll try.”

  I look down at my giant belly, wondering if it will ever return to its previous size.

  “What is it?”

  I look up at him and ask seriously, “What if you don’t find me sexy after?” I shrug, feeling sorry for my future self.

  “Makayla, there’s nothing that could ever make that true.”

  “You might feel differently after you see–”

  “What? The miracle of you giving life to my child?”