I Hate You More

by Moody, Alexandra

  “We missed you at football training over the summer…” Shane said the words slowly and tentatively, like he was ready to drop the conversation mid-sentence if I reacted the wrong way.

  My lips pulled tight as I nodded.

  “It’s been almost impossible to replace you. Are you sure you won’t reconsider joining the team again?”

  I glanced up at him and found his eyes were ignited by tenuous hope. My teammates were the only reason I’d managed to play for as long as I did, and my best friend was the last person I ever wanted to let down. There was no way I was going to change my mind though. “Sorry, man. My football days are over.”

  Shane sighed, and he slowly nodded. “Yeah, I know. I had to give it a shot though.”

  “You wouldn’t be a very good team captain if you hadn’t.”

  “True,” he agreed. “So, does Jenna know you’re back?” A playful grin lit up his features once more.

  I groaned at the question, wishing he hadn’t brought her up. It had been a mistake dating Jenna at the end of last year and one I still regretted. I rarely went out with girls from school. None of the girls there had ever seemed like the right fit for me, and I didn’t like to lead them on. Jenna had been flirting with me incessantly for most of junior year though, and I finally caved and went on one date with her. One date quickly turned into two, and before I knew it, we were a couple.

  I’d tried to break it off between us when I went away for the summer, but she hadn’t accepted that we were over, and I was still receiving endless texts months later. Shane knew perfectly well there was no way I’d told Jenna I was back in town. I wouldn’t be able to avoid her once school started tomorrow though.

  “Do I really need to answer that?” I lifted an eyebrow, making him grin. He loved nothing more than giving me shit.

  “But she really misses you,” he said. “She wouldn’t stop talking about you at the party last night. You should probably give her a call…”

  I picked up a shoe from my suitcase and launched it toward Shane’s head. He laughed as he easily dodged out of the way. “Look, you probably should have known better. That girl’s had her eye on you for years. You knew it wouldn’t end well.”

  “I was just hoping she’d realize we weren’t right for each other after we went on that first date and then she’d leave me alone.”

  “Such an amateur mistake,” Shane replied, shaking his head solemnly.

  There was a knock on the door and I glanced over my shoulder as Shane’s dad entered the room. “How’s it going in here, boys?” he asked.

  “Fine, I’m just getting my stuff sorted,” I said, giving him a warm smile. Mr. Lockwood was a really good guy. He’d welcomed me into his home for this year without question and had always let me sleep over when my dad was giving me a hard time over the years. If it weren’t for him, I’d be starting a new school this semester, and I was always going to be grateful to him that I wasn’t.

  “Is there anything you need?” he asked.

  “No, I’m pretty well set, thanks.”

  Mr. Lockwood nodded and gave me a smile. “Well, let me know if you think of anything. I’m cooking a back-to-school dinner for us all. It’ll be ready in ten, so you boys might want to start making your way downstairs.”

  “Sounds great,” I replied.

  “Think you can survive dinner with my sister?” Shane asked, once his dad had left the room.

  “I guess we’re about to find out.”

  * * *

  The ice princess barely said a word as the four of us sat around the Lockwood family dinner table. Her eyes were glued to her lasagna, and she only gave one-word answers to any question that came her way.

  “Are you ready for school tomorrow?”

  “Yes.”

  “How’s your dinner, Ally?”

  “Fine.”

  “Can you please pass the parmesan?”

  “No.” That last question was from me, and I probably should have known there was no way she’d help me out even if it was with something as simple as passing a garnish.

  I’d tried to ask her politely, but if that wasn’t going to work, I was left with no other choice. I ignored her response and leaned over her to grab the parmesan myself. I made sure to crowd her space as I leaned in, and I brushed up against her arm, disrupting her meal. My skin prickled from the contact, like some kind of natural warning sign that I was getting too close to danger. She jumped at the unexpected sensation between us, and her fork dropped from her hand, clattering loudly as it landed on the table. A small wave of satisfaction went through me when I felt her heated scowl warming the side of my face.

  I moved as slowly as possible as I retreated, enjoying every moment of her discomfort. I’d never been so close to her before, and the proximity made my heart beat faster. It felt like we were two magnets that buzzed with static when they got too close and couldn’t help but push each other away.

  “Jerk,” she hissed under her breath so no one else at the table could hear. She really was determined to stick to her one-word rule tonight. I grinned in response, making her glare turn more violent.

  I was used to being on the receiving end of one of Ally’s scowls, but I always struggled not to laugh at them. Her eyes were too big, and she looked like some kind of sad puppy rather than the angry pit bull she tried to portray.

  “Sorry, what did you say, Ally? I didn’t quite catch that.” My grin grew larger as I returned her stare.

  Her gaze flickered toward her dad before she let out an irritated breath and stared back down at her food. I happily proceeded to cover my food in parmesan, content in the knowledge I had won our latest battle. But the small triumph was quickly weighed down with the realization that the war was most likely going to last for the rest of the year.

  I let out a long sigh and focused on my food. I needed to get Ally to agree to play nice, or we’d spend the next twelve months slowly chipping away at each other. I worried that if we kept whittling each other down then neither of us was going to get through senior year in one piece. She’d said she’d consider the truce, and I just hoped she was willing to give it a chance.

  3

  Ally

  “Please tell me the rumors are true!”

  I closed my locker door and found Mia standing at my side. She was grinning at me, seemingly convinced that I knew what she was talking about. Her blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she was wearing an old pair of biker boots, denim shorts, and a flannel T-shirt. She was a master at finding amazing pieces at vintage shops and always dressed effortlessly cool. I think part of the reason she always looked great, no matter what she wore, was the simple fact she didn’t care what other people thought of her.

  “And what rumors would those be?” I asked.

  “The ones where Chase Williams is living with you for senior year!”

  I groaned and glanced at the ground, wishing it would just open up and swallow me whole. The first day of senior year hadn’t even started yet, and already, I wanted it to be over. “Please don’t remind me.”

  “So, it is true.”

  “Unfortunately.”

  A small crease formed across Mia’s brow at my response, but she didn’t let my frustration spoil her excitement. “Why didn’t you spill before now? We were all at the movies on Friday; you could have easily told us then.”

  “Because I only found out last night,” I replied. “And besides, I was somewhat hoping that if I didn’t say it aloud perhaps it wouldn’t really be happening.”

  Mia folded her arms over her chest, and her frown became more pronounced as some of the enthusiasm dimmed in her eyes. “Why aren’t you happy about this?”

  I opened my mouth to respond, but the words got stuck. How did I even begin to explain all the things that were wrong with Chase Williams living with me?

  “Probably because Chase gets his kicks in life from making Ally miserable,” Tessa said, coming to my rescue. I glanced in her direction as she came to stan
d next to me and could see pity in her gaze as we made eye contact. We were so close that sometimes it felt like we didn’t even need to speak to know how the other person was feeling, and with that one look, I could see she was asking if I was okay. I gave her a brief nod, and she responded with a supportive smile.

  “Since when does Chase like making Ally miserable?” Mia asked.

  Tessa let out a laugh and shook her head. “Since always. Did you have blinders on last year or something?” Mia had only come to Fairview six months ago, so I guess it wasn’t all that surprising she hadn’t noticed Chase was my mortal enemy.

  Mia’s forehead creased as though she was trying to remember any of the interactions she’d witnessed between Chase and me. There couldn’t have been many because I tended to avoid Chase like my life depended on it. There was an altercation in the cafeteria toward the end of last year that she probably would have seen though.

  As if reading my mind her eyes lit with understanding. “The pizza showdown.”

  “It wasn’t a showdown.”

  Tessa chuckled. “It totally was.”

  The two of us had been in line for food right by each other, and he’d taken the last four pizza slices. He’d given me a knowing smirk over his shoulder as he picked them up so I knew he’d done it on purpose. I couldn’t exactly stand by and let him get away with such a jerk move.

  “He deserved it,” I muttered.

  “And what about the pizza?” Tessa asked.

  “Well, you should never provoke a hungry woman and expect your pizza to live to tell the tale.”

  Tessa and Mia both laughed.

  “I guess you’re right,” Mia said. “You guys don’t really seem to get along. Maybe it’s just a misunderstanding though?”

  “Trust me. There’s no misunderstanding,” I confirmed. Chase looked at me with the kind of repulsion that was impossible to fake, and he’d made his opinions of me quite clear over the years.

  “So, how does this work into your senior year plans?” Tessa asked.

  My friends always teased me because I liked to plan things out. I always felt more comfortable going into a situation armed with a strategy. They often said that my diary was a clear sign I’d one day become a serial killer. I didn’t think it was nearly as weird as they insisted. So what if I had color-coded highlights for everything? I wasn’t a barbarian.

  I let out a long sigh. “It doesn’t.”

  “And have you given any more thought to the truce he offered?” Tessa continued. I’d called her last night the moment after Chase left me alone in my room and told her all about his offer. She was wary about the truce, but she seemed more open to considering the idea than me. Tessa wasn’t the one who had a list a mile long of reasons not to trust Chase though.

  I shook my head, my arms tightening around my books. “I’m still not sure that making a deal with the devil is a good idea. What if this is just another way for him to mess with me?”

  “Or what if he’s fed up fighting with you just as much as you’re fed up fighting with him?” Tessa asked. “A lot can happen over the summer.”

  “I suppose, but surely, he can’t have changed that much,” I replied. “I just wish I could get rid of him somehow.”

  “Well, that’s not going to happen,” Tessa said. “He’s got nowhere else to go, and your dad’s made up his mind about it. You’ve probably got a better chance of your dad agreeing to let you leave home yourself than convincing him to make Chase leave.”

  “I know, so can we please just talk about something other than my impending doom?”

  Tessa grinned at me. “Well, there has been other news circulating the corridors this morning. Did you hear there’s a new guy starting today?”

  Mia’s eyes lit up. “So, I’m not the new person anymore?”

  “Nope,” Tessa replied. “You’re officially losing your title.”

  Fairview was pretty small, and we’d all been at school together forever. It was rare that new kids got thrown into the mix, so a new boy starting in senior year was definitely big news.

  “And I’ve heard he’s cute,” Tessa added. “How much do you want to bet Jenna’s throwing herself all over him before the day is through?”

  “I thought she was dating Chase,” I said. She’d already dated pretty much every popular guy at school, but Chase was like Jenna’s white whale. I don’t think I’d ever seen her as smug as the day she rocked up to school on his arm, proudly showing off her biggest catch.

  “No, they stopped dating at the start of summer vacation,” Tessa said. “I sometimes wonder if you’re willfully deaf when it comes to that boy. The mere mention of his name in conversation and you tune out.”

  “Self-preservation?” I suggested, making Tessa shake her head at me.

  The bell rang, and I tucked a stray hair behind one ear. “Well, I guess it’s going to be an interesting year.”

  “It’s going to be amazing,” Mia added with a smile.

  I couldn’t help but disagree with her.

  * * *

  Mia wasn’t the first person to ask me about the rumor of Chase living with me that day. Several girls came up to me before and after classes, and by the time lunch rolled around, I was more than ready to never hear his name again. As if it wasn’t bad enough that Chase was now living with me, his name was following me everywhere I went, and I couldn’t seem to escape him.

  Even as I lined up for food in the cafeteria at lunch, the girls behind me whispered about it. At least most people asked me to my face. Hearing them gossiping behind my back seemed so much worse.

  I glanced over my shoulder at the two girls as I paid for my food, and they stopped talking. I didn’t recognize them, but by the look of their baby faces, they had to be freshman. Guilt flashed in their eyes when they realized I’d heard them, but the moment I looked away, they giggled.

  I let out a sigh and grabbed my tray. How was it that people I didn’t even know were talking about me? I hadn’t asked for any of this, and I certainly didn’t want it. I turned to walk over to my table, but as I spun around, I slammed into a hard body. Almost in slow motion, my tray full of food and drink went flying through the air. My soda cup sprayed everywhere, and the piece of pizza I’d been salivating over landed facedown on the linoleum floor.

  I swore, dropped to my knees, and tried to clean up the mess and salvage some of the food. I grabbed a handful of napkins, but they were quickly soaked in the sticky soda as I attempted to mop it up, and the pizza was definitely a goner. There was no such thing as a ten-second rule when it came to the school cafeteria floor. The person I had bumped into crouched down and helped me by passing over my bag of chips—the lone survivor from my tray’s demise.

  “Sorry for crashing into you,” I said, as I took the chips and looked up. My eyes widened with surprise as I found myself looking at a guy I didn’t recognize. He had kind eyes and an easy smile that made a pair of cute dimples appear. He looked about my age, and I was guessing he was the new kid Tessa had been talking about.

  “It’s no problem,” he said. “I should probably have been looking where I was going a little better.”

  I shook my head. “No, it was totally my fault. I’m kind of accident-prone and have a reputation for tripping on things that aren’t there. My food probably would have ended up on the floor even if you weren’t standing there.”

  The boy laughed, and the two of us stood. It was pretty sad that a packet of chips was the only thing to survive our collision, but after a day of dodging gossip, I wasn’t feeling all that hungry anyway.

  “I’m Ally, by the way.”

  “Luke,” he replied.

  We were standing in the way of other kids trying to get to the food line, so I gave him a small smile and started to step away. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around, Luke. Sorry again for trying to take you out on your first day at Fairview.”

  His smile turned into a grin. “You can take me out any day.”

  I tilted my head and fu
rrowed my brow. Was he flirting with me? “I’ll remember that,” I said before giving him another brief smile and making my escape.

  My usual table wasn’t far from where the accident had occurred, and my friends were all looking in my direction, watching as I approached. There was amusement in their eyes, and even Miles, who normally spent his lunches with his nose in a textbook, was struggling to withhold a grin. His wavy brown hair was as uncontrollable as always, and as I drew nearer, I saw there was an open science textbook on the table in front of him. I guess he’d had his nose in a book after all. He’d still managed to draw himself away from it long enough to watch my humiliation.

  “You guys saw,” I said, huffing out a defeated breath as I took a seat next to Miles and gave Mia and Tessa an accusing look.

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Miles said with a wink.

  “It was like watching a car crash, and none of us could tear our eyes away,” Tessa added.

  I stole one of Tessa’s fries from her tray and threw it at her face. She laughed as she tried to bat it out of the air with a waving hand. “You guys suck.”

  “It wasn’t all that bad,” Tessa said between chuckles. “So what if the new guy found out the hard way that you need to stay at least a meter away from Ally Lockwood at all times. At least you didn’t cover anyone in milkshake this time.”

  I groaned and placed my head in my hands. “I swear I’m cursed.” The fact it wasn’t the first time I’d taken someone out with my food tray was even more embarrassing. I really wished Tessa hadn’t reminded me.

  “You’re not cursed,” Mia said. “He didn’t look even slightly upset. In fact, it looked like he was flirting with you.”

  I slowly lifted my head out of my hands to look at her. She was giving me an encouraging smile as she nodded at me. “I think he might be into you.”