Teach Me Your Love

by Rita Hestand

  He stopped, didn't turn around but murmured, "Yes."

  He heard her gasp and he smiled as he walked out of the wickiup.

  Chapter Nine

  Every morning Naomi got up and kissed her ring, staring at it for a long moment. Smiling, she then fixed breakfast. She'd always wanted a wedding band, as most of her friends had one when they married. When John refused to consider it, she felt sad. It had been the one thing she wanted most from him, aside from a little attention every now and then.

  She remembered the only near kiss he gave, at the wedding. He kissed the corner of her mouth. She had been so disappointed she nearly cried.

  But for an Indian to think of such a thing, such a white tradition, it made her heart swell. And the kiss he gave her, made her want to throw caution to the wind and wind her arms around his neck. It was such a thoughtful gift.

  Chosen One was right, he was a good man. She felt so light hearted, so happy. Not because it was the most beautiful thing she'd ever owned, but because he thought of it. Killing five bears to get this one piece of gold—for her. She would treasure it the rest of her life. He couldn't possibly know how much it meant to her.

  The happiness it created inside her made her want to go out side and yell and holler and laugh. All because of one gold band and five bear skins. She shook her head, five bear skins.

  When Chosen One saw it, she gasped. "Red Elk gave you this?"

  "Yes, I can't imagine why he would, but I'll never take it off." She exclaimed.

  "It is beautiful and a sign of his caring for you."

  "I want to thank him, but don't know how. I've never had anything so beautiful in my life." She told her. She stared at the ring with such a smile. A smile that lit the wickiup.

  "I think there is more than companionship between you. He wanted to please you."

  "He paid five bear skins for it. And the last he carried on his shoulders a mile to catch his horse that ran off. Can you imagine the strength it took to do that?"

  "Red Elk thinks much of you, as he would not do this for any other."

  Naomi smiled, "My white husband didn't believe in jewelry. At least that's what he said. He was rather thrifty with his money. When Red Elk put it on my finger, he recited the vow that goes with it. I couldn't believe he knew so much about a white wedding." Naomi chuckled. "Where do you suppose he learned all this?"

  "At the forts, I am sure. He learns much there. But to seek that knowledge, to kill that many bears, it is a great honor he has given you. Red Elk learns quickly what is important. But he never gave anyone such a gift before. No one."

  "I felt so sorry for him when he came in yesterday, he was so tired. So, I did what my mother often did for my father. I gave him a massage, he loved it."

  "A massage?"

  Naomi chuckled and turned her around to massage her shoulders. "That is a massage."

  "Oh my, that is delightful." Chosen One smiled. "I will have to show Big Hand."

  They giggled and continued their tanning the deerskin that Big Hand had brought to them.

  "My mother used to give them to my father. He was always so happy when she did that for him."

  Chosen One took her hand, "We can learn many things together. I am so glad Red Elk saved you from Bear Foot. Your fate would have been much different with him, you know."

  Naomi smiled, "Yes, I'm sure it would. But you know," Naomi paused to smile and think about it. "I will always be grateful to Bear Foot though as he saved me from slaving with the Comanche. I was never so miserable in my life, as when I slaved for them. I thought it would never end. I felt destined to continue there as their slave forever."

  "Was it bad there?"

  "Oh, Chosen One, the women, they hated me. They spit on me, slapped me around knocked me down, tripped me. But one thing that was good, the men wouldn't bother with me after the women took care of me."

  "Perhaps in a way, that was good."

  "Yes, I think you are right."

  Later that day Red Elk came into the wickiup and was frowning.

  "Something wrong?" she asked.

  "It is of no consequence," he shrugged wearily, but the tension in him was evident from his expressionless face.

  "Then why are you upset?" she asked.

  "You know me pretty well, don’t you?" Red Elk shot her a quick smile.

  "I know when you are upset," she said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

  "No…. but…. I suppose I must." He sighed as he sliced a piece of venison from the table where she was working.

  She looked at him questioningly. "So, what has you so upset?"

  "Painted Dove is with child." He said flatly.

  Naomi studied him closely now, as sense of pessimism surrounding her. "Go on… " she encouraged, feeling her heart lurch and fall to her stomach.

  "Bear Foot thinks the child is mine." He said, as though expelling something distasteful.

  Naomi went back to the table to continue slicing more meat for their supper. She didn’t want him to see how upset she was. She had no right to be, but she was. "I see…"

  "It is not mine, Naomi." He said softly now, coming behind her. His arms going around her, protectively. For a moment, she reveled in his arms around her and she had a notion to give in to the feeling.

  But instead, she nodded and turned to face him. "Of course, it isn't."

  "You believe me?" He gasped.

  She looked up at him with a melancholy she wasn't feeling, "Yes."

  "Why do you believe me?" He turned her, so he could look into her face. His eyes meeting hers.

  "If it were yours you would be happy to claim it. That's all. Anyone that knows you very well, knows this."

  He pulled her chin up and smiled into her face, "You do know me well." He kissed her on the tip of her nose and smiled.

  "Why does he claim it is yours?"

  "She is about three months. You cannot tell it yet, so no more than three. She was here during that time. He naturally assumed." He kept smiling at her.

  "But you are so sure it isn't. How can you be so sure?" she asked him.

  He took her hands in his now. "I have not touched her for over five months. It cannot be mine. Of that I am very sure."

  Naomi stared now. "Five months, why?" she asked innocently. "I mean, I thought…. "

  He sighed now and grabbed a biscuit and hacked a piece of meat. "It is a long story. An ugly one too. But I caught her with someone else, and I told her no more."

  "Y-you caught her with someone else?"

  "Yes, my cousin."

  "Then it is his child?" she asked.

  "I don’t know, it could be any number of people's child. Naomi, she was sleeping around with many at the time. She is a whore, Naomi. She probably doesn't know whose child it was." He waved his hand in the air. "And that is very sad."

  "Did you tell Bear Foot that?"

  "No, but it looks as though I'll have to." He frowned again. "I do not care to smirch her reputation, but if she does not come forward and tell the truth, then I must. It isn't a pleasant task. And I must tell you now, I may not be believed."

  "What would they do to you if they don't believe you?"

  "Banish me from the tribe." He told her.

  She stared, "Then we must make them believe it."

  "Why do you defend me, not long ago you worried that I kissed her."

  "I accepted what you told me. You had no reason to lie to me. I did not think it was right, but you did, and you told me why. I accept it."

  "If I must leave the camp, will you go with me?" he asked, staring at her.

  "I am your wife now, I go where you go." She said simply. "Unless you don't want me."

  He stood up, grabbed her by the arms and whirled her around to face him. "You would stand by me even if I was condemned?"

  "Red Elk, if the child were yours, you'd be celebrating now. You'd throw me out and marry her. So, I know it is not yours."

  His eyes pinned her now, his smile faded. "Never, I
would never throw you out. Don't you know that yet? And I would never take another wife… "

  She swallowed, "You wouldn't?" Her voice faltered a little from his sweet words.

  "Never," he murmured as his lips came down on hers softly. Taken by surprise, she clung to him as his lips massaged hers into submission. She moaned softly. Slowly her arms went around his neck and the kiss deepened to something much more.

  She'd never been kissed so sweetly, and the problem was, she liked it. She wanted more…

  When he raised his head, his eyes glittered into hers. "Then I will not worry any longer. My concern was of you, not her."

  "But you should set them straight. You must. This is your home, you cannot let her run you out of your home. She doesn't belong here, you do!"

  "I will think on it." He told her.

  She was still reeling from the kiss, but she couldn't concentrate on it, as it was too distracting for her. And his words startled her. He would never have another wife. Why had he said that? He had told her he would find another to give him a child, if she hadn't within the year. She wasn't sure what it all meant.

  Assuming too much from his words would be wrong. She had to wait until he could explain what he meant.

  "The meat is good?" she asked.

  "Very, so tender. What did you do to it?"

  "I soaked it in apple cider vinegar. It's an old trick." She smiled.

  "You’re a good companion, Naomi." He said as a smile crept over his face. "And a very good wife."

  "So are you," she nodded. "A good husband."

  But Red Elk didn't seem to worry about what Painted Dove had done and it bothered her that she would cause Red Elk so much trouble.

  The next day she went to Chosen One.

  "She's with child?" Chosen One gasped.

  "Yes. And he's not even worried. I do not want to see him have to leave here. He is innocent."

  "How do you know?" Chosen One asked, staring at her.

  "He has not slept with her for over five months."

  "Five months, why?"

  Naomi nearly laughed, she was shocked too. "Because he caught her with his cousin."

  "His cousin, Blue Sky?"

  "I don’t know his name."

  "He is young, and very stupid. But quite handsome." Chosen One shook her head. "She would bed a rat."

  Naomi chuckled.

  "Come, we will tell Bear Foot."

  "Do you think we should?"

  "It is the truth and coming from us would be better than coming from someone else."

  Naomi nodded.

  They went to Bear Foot's wickiup. Chosen One introduced Naomi, but Naomi remembered him well. He nodded. When Chosen One told him of Painted Dove's adventures with many of the tribesmen, Bear Foot was shocked. And yet, his wives who were there too, were not surprised and they all nodded their heads in agreement with Chosen One.

  At first, he did not believe, but Chosen One told him of another she had bedded, that she saw her with. Bear Foot nodded and began to consider it. Bear Foot was very angry.

  When they left, they heard him calling her inside?

  "What will he do to her?" Naomi asked.

  "With him there is no telling. Put her over the coals and make her confess, maybe." She told her.

  "Will Red Elk be mad at us or him?"

  "It does not matter. If he asks, I will tell him I heard the rumor and that I set him straight about Painted Dove."

  Naomi nodded but something was bothering her. "Why does Red Elk treat her so gently?"

  "She is a beautiful young woman, and he made love with her for a while. He would not hurt her in any way, it is not his way. Red Elk is a gentle man, and he respects most women."

  "Do you think he loves her?"

  Chosen One studied her, "No, I think he's falling in love with you!"

  "Me? What makes you say that? We don't have relations."

  "That is partly why I think it. He did not rape you or touch you. He respected you. He bought you a white woman's ring, to show his love for you. He never bought Painted Dove anything. He feels sorry for her, because she cannot stop seducing men. And because he loved her enough to make love with her. But he isn't in love with her. Even if she'd had his child, he would never have loved her truly. For he knew her weakness of seducing and he didn’t respect that of her. When one loses respect for their husband or wife the love is no longer there. He's too white in that regard, it is his religion."

  "I know he cares for her. But our relationship is not personal. We are merely companions. That's what he wanted."

  "Do you honestly think he would buy a companion a ring? And kill five bears for it?"

  Naomi took a deep breath and smiled. "I've been hoping it meant something, but I was afraid to think it aloud."

  "It is hard to understand men sometimes. Red Elk wanted a child. I think the child represents his need to be a part of someone. He's had women, but none that really loved him. He needs love just like everyone else. He has not found it. Painted Dove was his slave, so he took her, hoping for a child. It did not come. He realized it was not meant to be, and he caught her with someone else. She wasn't loyal and that was the turning point of their relationship. You must not hold her against him. As all men have women, but when they finally realize what they want, it is different. Your white husband was he loyal to just you?"

  "No, but my issue with him was his dishonesty. It would have saved us both a lot of grief he had told me about his religion and given me a chance to consider and chose whether I wanted to deal with it or not. Instead, he was dishonest and brought the two women to our home without any warning, announcing they were his wives. It was his dishonesty and telling me of his faithfulness to his religion all the while that made me not love him any longer. I realized then it was his religion that was turning our marriage into a sham. And it was his religion that made me feel so bad about myself for so long. By the time I did know about it, I was married to him for a full year. But I would no longer have relations with him because of it. In truth, if my parents had known when he asked their permission, they would not have granted it. Sometimes I think of him and wonder why he wanted to marry me in the first place. I was not of his faith and he knew it."

  Chosen One nodded, "It is the same with Red Elk. He stopped caring for Painted Dove when he realized her sickness, and she was no longer loyal to him."

  "I guess we have that in common then." Naomi realized.

  "One day you will no longer worry about Red Elk." She promised with a smile. "You will know. For he will not lie about anything, and someday, somehow, you will know how he feels. It may take a while, so be patient with him, for he is worth the wait. Remember, he did not buy that ring for any purpose but to please you."

  "I hope your right. Thank you for helping me straighten this out. I did not want him to suffer because of her."

  "We women sometimes have to do the straightening out. Men don't see the need. But I did not want to see you drug all over the countryside because of that girl." She told her.

  "Thank you for being my friend."

  Chosen One smiled, "And thank you."

  Naomi went back to her wickiup and began the evening meal. She thought over all that Chosen One had said and resigned herself to try and live happily, as Red Elk did.

  Chapter Ten

  That evening she saw Red Elk talking to Bear Foot and worried how he would take the news. Perhaps he would think her butting into his business. Perhaps she didn’t understand just how close he was to Painted Dove. So many things ran through her mind. She felt anxious when he came inside.

  She had dinner ready and they ate.

  His silent indifference lingered in the air.

  She wanted to talk to him about what her and Chosen One had done, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything. She'd never seen him angry and she didn't know what to expect from him. But the silence was driving her insane.

  She wished he would say something, but he didn't. There were no smiles, no
talk of her day like he usually asked.

  When it came time for bed, they went to bed and he said nothing. This worried her more. It wasn't like him.

  But she tried to go to sleep and failed. She lay there half the night worrying over what she'd done. What she would never do again. For she quickly learned, it wasn't her business. Indian were very proud and always the masters of their homes. She had to remember that.

  The next morning, he said very little. She hated the silence between them. If only he would yell or something.

  She was in knots. If he was angry with her for interfering, she wanted to know. Get it out in the open.

  Still, he said nothing of it.

  "I'm going to the fort today, I may be late… " he finally told her.

  "Wait!" she called him back. "Do you want to take this back?" she started to take the ring off.

  He caught her hand, "You said you would never take it off… " his voice held something akin to anger.

  "I-I know," she stared and thought she saw hurt in his eyes. She hadn't meant to hurt him, "but you are mad at me… and maybe I don't deserve it."

  "For what? For what am I angry?" he asked, his voice tight with restraint.

  "For meddling in your business." She blurted.

  "I did not know for sure that you did." He told her releasing her hand.

  "I told Chosen One, she thought we should talk to Bear Foot, that's all."

  "He believed her."

  "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything to her."

  "No, you shouldn't have, but it is done. It is over now, and of no consequence." He turned to leave.

  "I am sorry." She told him. "You wouldn't be mad if it was of no consequence."

  He walked out without a word.

  She felt bereft. Red Elk was angry with her. She might as well leave now. He wouldn't want her around. His silence and his withheld temper told her he was angry. If they were truly companions, they could talk this out. Obviously, she wasn't even a good companion.

  Tears rolled down her cheek. She realized she didn't want to leave, but she knew it was probably best. She had gotten used to being with him, talking to him, laughing with him. Now there was anger between them, and it was her fault.