Ryder

by L. A. Casey

  I reached down and pinched his nipple, gaining his attention.

  “Ow.”

  “Don’t ‘ow’ me,” I quipped. “What the hell did you speak to me for if I didn’t have to get up yet?”

  He grinned. “Scoot your ass down a little and you’ll feel why.”

  I growled. “Sleep wins over sex every time, I thought I told you that already!”

  His lips quirked. “Huh, mustn’t have been listening to you when you said that.”

  Shocker.

  I climbed off Ryder, and fell onto my side of the bed, facing away from him.

  “I’m goin’ back to sleep, keep your dick and hands away from me.”

  He was silent for a few moments and I thought that he accepted what I said as law, but that was until I felt something press against my hip.

  “What did I just say?” I asked, trying my best to keep my voice even.

  “You said,” Ryder murmured, “to keep my dick and hands away from you, you said nothing about my tongue.”

  Said tongue slid over the curve of my hip and up the side of my body causing me to suck in a sharp breath.

  Be strong, woman.

  “Ryder Slater,” I managed to say. “Back away.”

  He did almost instantly, but I practically felt his frown.

  “Damn,” he murmured. “You really aren’t in the mood?”

  I shook my head. “I’m tired. We have sex every single day, most days more than once. I’m only a woman, not a machine.”

  “Are you complaining?”

  “No.” I laughed because he sounded so disgusted. “I’m definitely not, but I need time to rest or I’m never goin’ to be able to keep up with you.”

  I thought we were straying away from the topic of sex until Ryder opened his mouth and caused my eyes to roll towards the heavens.

  “Can we swap you stroking my ego for stroking my cock instead?” he asked, and then laughed when I blindly kicked back at him.

  “Goodnight, Ryder.”

  I felt lips press against my shoulder.

  “Goodnight, baby.”

  I smiled when he settled behind me and hooked his arm around my body then covered our naked bodies with our bed cover. I snuggled into my pillow and sighed when my body started to relax once more. I blinked my eyes open a few minutes later when my mind refused to follow suit. I turned to face Ryder, glaring at him when I found he was looking at me with his shining grey eyes.

  “I can’t go back asleep now, you bastard.”

  He smiled. “So talk to me since we’ve got nothing else to do.”

  “What about your run?” I questioned.

  Ryder shrugged. “It takes me two seconds to get dressed, which gives you twenty minutes to do what you keep yapping on about.”

  I grunted. “What do I keep yappin’ on about?”

  “You always say we don’t talk enough, so let’s talk.”

  I glared at him. “You’re puttin’ me on the spot.”

  “So?”

  “So I don’t have a topic in mind.”

  “I do.”

  “Shoot.”

  “When can we get married?”

  I felt my mouth drop open, and it made Ryder laugh.

  “What?” he asked. “You look like you didn’t know that we’d eventually move on from being engaged to actually getting hitched.”

  My mouth went very dry, so I licked my lips.

  “No, I know that, obviously, I just didn’t think you would be thinkin’ of that.”

  Ryder’s lips quirked. “I knew what I was doing when I asked you to marry me outside of the hospital that night two years ago, Branna. I imagined my life without you and I couldn’t, but more than that, I didn’t want to. I love you, baby.”

  Without thinking, I got to my hands and knees then straddled his body with mine. I leaned my face down to his and said, “I love you too, and we can get married whenever you want to. I’m so ready.”

  Ryder smiled. “We’ll figure it out.”

  “We always do… and since we’re figurin’ that out, I’m gonna figure your problem out.”

  “What do you—oh!”

  I suppressed a giggled.

  “Yeah,” Ryder breathed when I shimmied down his body, and took him by surprise by taking his hardened length in my mouth. “I’m definitely going to grow old with you.”

  Present day…

  “Where are you goin’, Ry?” I mumbled aloud to myself when a couple hundred metres ahead of me Ryder took a right turn that would lead into a secluded part of the mountain side where there were no street lights, no houses, no people.

  Hell, there was barely a road to drive on.

  I had been following him for only ten minutes, but I sensed we were near his destination. For the tenth time, I ignored the vibration of my phone from my pocket because I knew it was the twins who were calling me.

  I switched my headlights off and took the same turn behind him but made sure to drive extra slow so I didn’t wreck Dominic’s car and also so he wouldn’t see me. I didn’t worry about losing Ryder because his car was the only car on the trail, and his taillights still shone brightly like a beacon.

  I jumped when I drove over a pothole that caused the car to lurch. I gripped the steering wheel tightly and blew out a nervous breath. I was wired and couldn’t control much of my body because I had a sudden case of the shakes. My entire body trembled with fear and anticipation of what was going to be the outcome of my mission.

  I didn’t have to wait long to find out as Ryder stopped his car up ahead and parked it in front of a white Range Rover. I could see the colour and make of the car because when Ryder got out of his car, he left his keys in the ignition and his headlights switched on. I stopped driving, put Dominic’s car in park and switched off the ignition. I exited the car, closed the door quietly and thanked God for the dark of the night as cover.

  I said a little prayer, and on unsteady legs, I made my move.

  I ducked down and crept forward until I was not too far away from where Ryder stood. I hunkered down behind a hedge only a mere twenty meters or so from him and the white Ranger Rover. I was close but not close enough because I couldn’t hear what was being said. I could only hear the tone of Ryder’s voice and that of another voice.

  A female voice.

  My blood ran cold knowing it was a woman Ryder drove out here to meet. All kinds of things were running through my mind, but I couldn’t settle on one thought. I felt like my eyes were deceiving me, and what I was witnessing wasn’t really happening.

  “You liar.” I whispered as I watched Ryder lean into the window of the white Range Rover.

  My chest squeezed when I heard laughter from the female in the driver’s seat. I didn’t know what she was laughing at, or what Ryder was doing to make her laugh, but what I did know is that he kept his head, shoulders and arms inside the driver’s window of her car and was making her laugh.

  I felt sick. I felt weak. I felt numb.

  I didn’t want to stick around and find out what he was doing to make her laugh because I feared I’d do something that would hurt me more in the long run. I lowered myself back down to my hunkered position, reached out and gripped onto the bush that I was hiding behind and inhaled and exhaled deeps breaths.

  I’m going to pass out.

  I squeezed my eyes shut and forced myself to continue taking deep breaths. When the urge to faint passed, I focused on not vomiting. My stomach was churning and rolling, and there was a pain in my chest that I had never felt before in my life. It was a similar pain I felt when my parents died, but for some reason, it was much worse.

  Ryder… he was cheating on me.

  He was betraying me, and I had the proof, but I still couldn’t believe what was unfolding before my eyes. I didn’t understand it, and I didn’t want to. I just wanted to erase the image and sound of Ryder and the woman’s laughter. I didn’t want to think of him smiling because it reminded me so much of the smile he used to show me wheneve
r he saw me.

  Home, I told myself. I need to go home.

  A strong woman would have confronted Ryder, and possibly run him over with his beloved car while the bitch he cheated with watched, but I wasn’t a strong woman. I was a shell of the woman I used to be, and what I just witnessed would stay with me forever.

  I was broken.

  I numbly retraced my steps back to Dominic’s car and when I got back inside the vehicle everything felt wrong. The silence was unbearable, but I didn’t want to hear anything else. My heart was slamming into my chest, and the pain I felt with each beat was the only reminder that I was still living, but surely there was more to living than feeling so dead inside?

  The taste of sickening infidelity in my mouth urged me to start Dominic’s car. I quickly reversed until I came back to the main road where I switched my headlights back on and safely pulled onto it. I hated how I felt. I was numb to what I was experiencing, but yet my chest hurt. I couldn’t cry, but I knew that’s what the hurt I felt wanted me to do.

  My body knew something was wrong, but my brain hadn’t reached the point where it was on the same wavelength. I understood what I saw and what it meant, but I didn’t feel any kind of way over it. I just couldn’t believe it was real.

  I found myself laughing hysterically like a crazy person when I realised only hours before that Ryder asked me if I was cheating on him, when it fact, he was the cheater.

  Him.

  I drove Dominic’s car back to his and Bronagh’s house. I didn’t know why, but I completely bypassed my house and just went to theirs. I parked behind Kane and Alec’s cars and I was glad to see that they were there. I didn’t want anyone around me right now, and when I went back to my house, I wanted to be there on my own.

  I quietly made my way up the pathway to Dominic and Bronagh’s front door. I heard the cry of a baby and chatter of men. I distinctively heard Damien saying Dominic’s name, too, which meant they were no longer at my house. When they realised I was gone with Dominic’s car, this was obviously the first place they checked for me.

  Before any of them could come outside and catch me, I quietly put the car keys inside their letterbox without them knowing. In a daze I walked back to my house and was fully aware that the numbness I felt would soon fade and agonising pain would fill me, but until that happened, I intended to go home and pack my belongings together.

  I needed to get out before Ryder came back. I wasn’t strong enjoy to face him, and I feared I’d do something dangerous if he lied to my face when I saw with my own eyes that he was with another woman.

  Ryder is cheating on me.

  I unlocked my front door and stepped into my house. I closed the door behind me and looked down to my pocket when my phone vibrated, and as if someone else controlled me, I slipped my hand into my pocket, and without looking at who was calling me, I answered the phone and placed it against my ear.

  “Hello?”

  “Branna?” Ash chirped. “Hey Angel, do you have a minute? I’m telling my sister about the code red we had today and I forget what our response time was. Was it ninety-one seconds, or ninety-five?”

  “Ninety-one,” I replied without hesitation, my tone flat.

  “Bran?” Ash said. “Are you okay, hon?”

  “No, Ash.”

  “What’s wrong?” Ash asked and I heard him moving about.

  “Ryder,” I blinked. “He’s cheatin’ on me.”

  “Oh, fuck,” Ash hissed. “I’ll kill him!”

  I didn’t reply, instead I walked down the hallway and into the kitchen.

  “Where are you?” Ash demanded. “I’ll be right there!”

  “I’m in me house, I just walked in—”

  “Hello, Branna.”

  I swirled around at the unknown voice that cut me off and stared into the dark room. I was too far away from reaching the light switch without moving, and I couldn’t move even if I tried. My legs had locked when I heard the voice of a strange man and fear broke through my numbness and shot through me.

  “Branna?” Ash said from my phone. “Who was that?”

  “Someone… someone is in me house,” I replied and felt oddly calm, but that feeling fled a moment later.

  I heard movement over by the back door, and screeched when the shadow of a tall man came out of the shadows and surged toward me. I dropped my phone and tried to run out of the kitchen, but the man was on me before I even had a chance to move. We hit the floor with a thud, and almost instantly I felt blunt pain rack up and down my body. It caused a shrill scream to rise up my throat and break free.

  “BRANNA?!” I heard Ash scream through the phone lying by my head.

  I had fallen to the ground first and the body of the man’s added extra weight on top of mine when I hit the ground only caused the impact to hurt that much more. He used my sudden stillness to his advantage and quickly pinned my arms above my head with one hand, while he used the weight of his body to pin my legs and body to the ground. I forgot about fighting him off when fighting to breathe became my number one priority.

  “Shhhh, sweetheart.” The man crooned with a Southern American accent. “It’s going to be okay, Branna. Don’t you worry about a thing, honey. I’m going to take real good care of you.”

  I wheezed as I desperately tried to suck air into my lungs, but suddenly felt my body go lax as something pinched my neck. One second I was in pain and a blind panic, and the next I was slipping into unconsciousness.

  My last thought was of Ryder and the woman from the white Range Rover, and how my life had already ended before this stranger had chance take it from me.

  One year ago…

  I was tired.

  Not physically, but mentally.

  I felt as if I was on a merry go round with Ryder. Our stupid arguing had amplified and instead of happening once or twice a week, it was happening once or twice a day. We either fought with one another, or ignored each other. It was becoming tiresome.

  It all started six months ago, just after Dominic started fighting at Darkness under Brandon Daley. Ryder would disappear for a few hours, and when I asked where he was, he’d blow up at me. I forgot about it after a while because my long hours at the hospital had me overlooking his nightly absences. I could have probably dealt with him being evasive, but while he was in my presence his arsehole behaviour and snippy remarks picked away at me until a fight was ignited.

  This was the beginning of our downward spiral, and now, six months later, I was at a stand still. I didn’t know what to do about the situation, and I refused to bring my problems to my friends or Ryder’s brothers because they had their own shit to work through. They didn’t need my drama added to theirs.

  The only thing I could do was turn a blind eye to the situation, which meant ignoring Ryder. I knew it was wrong to brush our problems under the carpet, but knowing any attempt to deal with it would turn into a screaming contest kept my mouth shut.

  It was hurting me though. I didn’t know what had gone wrong in order for Ryder not to talk to me or trust me anymore, but whatever happened, it was enough to change him. He wasn’t the man I once knew, and it broke my heart.

  I shook my head clear and grabbed my shower bag. I had been sleeping in Dominic’s old room once or twice a week when fighting got bad between Ryder and myself, and last night was once of those nights. Usually, I’d shower in any of the bathrooms in the house when I couldn’t use another one, but I preferred the shower in my and Ryder’s master bathroom. It was bigger and the showerhead was made so it was like a waterfall raining water onto your head instead of a little spray.

  I made my way down the stairs and headed into my room. It was empty, as expected. I didn’t know where Ryder was; he probably didn’t come home last night. He sometimes did that. Since I had two hours until I needed to leave for work, I would enjoy my shower and wash away my latest fight with Ryder, and try and relax.

  It was something I hadn’t done it a while.

  I headed into the bathroom,
and was surprised when steam puffed into my face. I dismissed it and closed the door behind me and turned towards the shower. I walked head first into a hard, wet chest.

  I gasped and looked up. When my eyes landed on him, I swallowed.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were in here.”

  I didn’t know you were home at all.

  Ryder looked down at me and raised an eyebrow. “It’s your bathroom too, don’t be sorry.”

  I slowly nodded.

  “Are you still giving me the silent treatment?” he asked on a sigh.

  “I don’t know. Are you still being an arsehole who can’t answer a few simple questions?” I countered.

  “Yeah,” he quipped. “Seems I am.”

  I lifted my hand and wiggled my fingers for him to move out of my way, giving him my reply. Silently.

  “Only you could give a huge ‘fuck you’ with a singlehanded gesture and silence.”

  I rolled my eyes, and tried to push by him.

  Ryder didn’t move, he just continued to stare down at me. I didn’t like how he was openly raking his eyes over my body like I was a piece of meat, so I returned the favour. Only that backfired very quickly because I adored the view on display.

  I found my eyes slowly, very slowly, scanning their way down Ryder’s chiselled, tattooed body and fuck me if it didn’t stir something lower in my abdomen. I licked my lips as I watched a droplet of water run from his chest, down to the beautiful defined oblique muscles at the base of his torso.

  Fuck.

  He was hotter than ever, all the extra hours of workouts he had been putting in over the last few months were clearly working and my eyes reaped the rewards. I badly wanted to run my hands, and tongue, all over him, but I remembered how things were between us and it dampened down the rise in my temperature.

  “Enjoying the view?” he asked, his voice so low it hardened my nipples.