Didn't Mean To Love You (Serendipitous Love Book 2)

by Christina C Jones

  “No,” she said, shaking her head. “Not all. Everybody is out of town, but Roman and Simone gave me a nice big gift certificate to my favorite spa, and Eddie had a case of my favorite wine delivered this morning. So… no, not all bad, but I wish they were here to celebrate my birthday.”

  “Your birthday?” As soon as the word “birthday” crossed my lips, she blushed, averting her gaze away from me. “Yeah, Frenchy. I see how you treat me, couldn’t even tell me about it, I had to find out on the streets,” I teased, even though I did feel a little slighted that this was the first time she had mentioned it to me.

  She gave me a sheepish smile as she hunched her shoulders. “Well… I did not want you to feel like it was something to make a big deal of.”

  I pointed to the gifts on her counter. “But it is a big deal. Your other friends got you presents.”

  “Right. I did not want you to think you had to do that too, since we are not that kind of friends.”

  That feeling right then, like a knife through my chest? Big. Fucking. Problem.

  “Oh,” I said, suddenly feeling a little bit dumb as hell about the little box in my jacket pocket. Not that kind of friends. I guess I should be glad for that, glad that she wasn’t thinking about anything long term, nothing serious. Hell, we weren’t even friends like that.

  “Carter, that did not come out the way it was intended,” she said, placing a hand on my knee. “What I mean is that … us having sex, it has complicated things enough. I did not want to put you in a position where you felt obligated to do something for me. That may be a bit presumptuous, but… I feel like I know you pretty well, and had you known…”

  I lifted an eyebrow. “Did you not want me to do anything for you? I mean… I look like a terrible friend when you’ve got wine, and spa days, and flowers, and diamonds up here.”

  “I hate these flowers, and jewelry means nothing to me.”

  Cringing, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the box, which I held out to her. “So… this was probably not the best idea then, huh?”

  “Carter,” she said, her voice suddenly thick with emotion again. “What is this?”

  I smiled. “What… you thought I didn’t know today was your birthday?” When she didn’t respond, I nudged the box into her hands, and she took it, but left it closed. “I asked Eddie a few weeks ago, which was just in time, because I had to order this, and have it rushed to make sure it arrived in time.”

  “Really?” she asked, her chin trembling.

  “Yes, really. See… you think it wasn’t a big deal for me to know, but I believe in celebrating people on their birthday. I know you said jewelry doesn’t mean anything to you, but… why don’t you open the box?”

  With shaky hands, she did, staring for a long time before she looked up at me. “Carter… this is beautiful,” she said, lifting the charm bracelet from the box. The custom bracelet, filled with tiny hand painted ceramic charms in the shapes of truffles and candy bars, and stamped initial charms, and cocoa mugs and gift boxes molded in silver hadn’t cost much at all — probably less than any of the other gifts she’d gotten. But the look on her face… damn, that pure, overwhelming happiness… it made me wish I had ordered her five of them.

  “So you like it?”

  She laughed. “Like it? Carter… this might be the best thing anybody has ever given me. Put it on me.” Chuckling, I obliged her request, fastening the bracelet around her wrist. She held it up, smiling before she turned back to me, throwing her arms around my neck to hug me. “Thank you so much for being my friend,” she murmured into my ear, her lips brushing against my skin. That sent blood rushing straight to my groin, and she was halfway in my lap, so I knew she could feel it, but she didn’t pull away.

  Our gazes caught and held, and she raised her mouth for a kiss, which I happily gave. As always, she was sweet, and succulent, and fucking delicious. And gorgeous. And not someone I should be kissing like this, not someone I should be involved with like this at all. But I couldn’t make myself stop, because Viv was irresistible to me, and I’d wanted her for so long, since that day we bumped into each other outside of our apartments.

  I wonder if she remembers that?

  I was fresh off the court from a game of two-on-two with Roman and a couple of other dudes, Kareem and Davis. It was early summer, so I was sweaty as hell, just ready to get home and into the shower to wash off the funk. I’d always thought it was stupid, the way the doors were configured between my corner apartment and the one beside me, in such a way that you had to stand in front of the other person’s door to get into yours. That day, I was drained, and a little thing as simple as getting my keys out of my pocket was taking forever.

  Then, the other apartment door was flung open, and five feet, seven or eight inches of bad-as-hell barreled right into me, dressed in a midriff-baring top that showed off her belly-button ring, and long, flowing skirt that reached to the sandals strapped around her ankle. I was staring, but I didn’t feel bad, cause hell, she was too. Slowly, damn near greedily, she raked her eyes over me, then finally brought them up to my face. Creamy, glowing, deep caramel skin, big soulful brown eyes, a fucking huge mass of kinky-curly hair — still jet black back then— and what had to be the prettiest face I’d ever seen.

  We recognized each other, obviously, cause we worked on the same block, but this was the first time we’d been close like this. Alone like this. I’m pretty sure we took that deep, thirsty, “I really wanna see you naked” swallow at the same time. But I didn’t make that request, even though I really wanted to, cause only creeps say shit like that to women they only know vaguely, from seeing them around the neighborhood. Instead, I smiled. Asked her if she was okay, since she ran into me pretty hard on her way out the door.

  “Why are you outside of my apartment?” she asked, and a glance down at her fingers tightening around the black aerosol attached to her keys told me I was about to get my ass pepper-sprayed without a quick explanation.

  I held one hand up in a conciliatory gesture as I pulled my keys from my pocket, and unlocked my door. “We’re neighbors,” I said, smiling again in an attempt to ease her anxiety.

  She visibly relaxed when I pushed open the door, and finally, she gifted me with a smile. “Forgive me,” she said. “Living in this neighborhood is new for me, so I may be a little overly cautious. Vivienne Lambert.” She held out her hand to shake mine, and I accepted the gesture, grasping her hand a little tighter than intended when warm energy rushed over my skin at her touch. She felt it too, I could tell, because she abruptly pulled her hand back, clutching a handful of her skirt.

  “Carter Dixon. And there’s no such thing as too cautious for a woman in the city, but this neighborhood is mostly pretty safe. A few troublemakers here and there, but that’s the same everywhere you go, right?”

  Now that I was no longer in danger of taking a blast of chemicals to the face, I picked up the hint of an accent as she spoke.

  “Very true. But, back to this neighbor thing… so you are the one who wakes me up every morning at seven, blasting Good Morning through my bedroom wall?” Her voice was stern, but her eyes held the promise of the smile playing at the corners of her mouth.

  I pushed my hands in my pockets, leaning against the wall between our doors. “You got a problem with Kanye West?”

  “Graduation Kanye was not so bad,” she replied with a wink as I drew my head back in surprise.

  “Ohhh, so you’re—”

  “What’s going on here, baby?”

  Over her shoulder, some boring looking dude was coming up the stairs, looking between us over his glasses like a nosy dorm parent. Her back was to him, and she grimaced, just slightly, before shooting me what I could only describe as an apologetic smile as he came up behind her, gripping her possessively at the waist.

  “I’ve been downstairs waiting on you for like half an hour,” he said in a loud whisper, damn near putting his mouth on her ear even though his eyes were on me.

&n
bsp; She turned her head to frown at him. “It has been more like two minutes Darren, don’t exaggerate. I am ready, we can go.” She put her attention back on me, granting me one last smile. “It was nice to meet you Carter. I will see you around.”

  Darren tugged at her waist, pulling her toward the stairs. When they were no longer facing me, he snaked his hand down behind her to grope her ass, which he had to know I would be checking out. I denied myself the pleasure of laughing at his heavy-handed need to show me that she was his.

  “See you around, Vivienne,” I called behind them, just to make his lame ass squirm.

  She paused, pushing herself up on her toes to see my face over the stair rail. “It’s Viv. My friends call me Viv.”

  Now, she was in my arms, my fingers were inside of her, and she was hot, and wet, and willing, and there was no punk assed boyfriend to interrupt, but the difference was… I knew her now, and I knew Viv was the kind of girl that was dangerous for me, but she tasted so goddamned good, and she was so gorgeous, so smart, so compassionate… why the fuck did I think I could be “just” this girl’s friend?

  “Carter?” she whimpered, sending a fresh round of blood surging to my groin, making me even harder than I thought was humanly possible.

  “Yeah?”

  “Bedroom.”

  I smiled at the “o” her lips formed when I pushed deeper, nearly causing her to lose the delicate balance she had on her tip-toes in front of me. “It’s your world, birthday girl.”

  — & —

  “If I didn’t know better, I would say you look like a man in love.”

  Shaking my head, I tore my eyes away from Viv long enough to smile at Simone, who had come to sit beside me at the counter. It was moving day for her, Roman, and his little girl Zahra, into a bigger townhome in a quieter part of our neighborhood. I’d just finished helping Roman bring in the last big piece of furniture, and was taking a much-needed break, which included watching Viv — who was looking her adorably colorful self, in deep teal jeans and a bright orange sweater — hang curtains, fluff pillows, and just be generally domestic.

  “It’s not like that,” I said, even though I couldn’t help returning my gaze to where Viv was now quietly, but animatedly discussing something with Eddie. Her curls flew around her face as she gave an emphatic shake of her head in response to something he said, and then she threw her head back and laughed. That was a sound I would never get tired of.

  Fucking beautiful.

  “Mmhmm. You sure?” There was laughter in Simone’s voice, and when I glanced at her, it was in her eyes too. “You can’t even stop staring at her long enough to have a conversation with me, Carter. You, my friend, are love-struck.”

  I sucked my teeth. “Stop playing, Simone. We’re just friends.”

  “Mmhmm.” Simone’s tone dripped with disbelief, and her eyebrow would be touching her hairline if she lifted it any higher.

  “Seriously.”

  Still, Simone didn’t say anything, just clasped her hands over her belly.

  “It’s not like that,” I insisted, my eye twitching as I forced myself to not look at Viv.

  At that, the corner of Simone’s mouth tipped up, and a slow smile spread across her face. “Are you trying to convince me… or yourself?”

  For a moment, I couldn’t say anything as I processed her question. Then I groaned, swiping a hand over my face. “I think we both know the answer to that.”

  “Yep,” Simone said, giving me a soothing pat on the shoulder. “You’ve got it bad, bro. Now what are you gonna do about it? This is so exciting!”

  I drew my head back, lifting an eyebrow. “What is so exciting?”

  “The prospect of you and Viv as a real couple. You two are friggin’ adorable together, and you’ve had a crush on her for so long. And maybe this will make me forget that you were gonna use me to get over her.”

  I cringed, mentally kicking myself for ever dropping that little tidbit to Simone. She didn’t really care that my original approaching of her had been pretty shortly after the high, then immediate low of finding out that pretty-ass Vivienne from the chocolate shop was my next door neighbor… but she had a boyfriend. The level of play that Simone had given me was minimal, because she was already involved with Roman, but she joked regularly about being my “rebound” friend.

  “Pump your brakes, Simone. Viv and I aren’t a couple, not like that.”

  “But you just admitted you liked her.”

  “I do like her,” I said, keeping my voice low. “I like her a lot, but… I’m just not trying to do the relationship thing right now. I’m not even sure what I’m doing with my life right now.”

  “Ah,” she smiled. “So you are thinking about dropping the barbershop, doing your programming thing?”

  “Not dropping it completely… maybe just pulling back. Not sure yet.”

  “But once you get settled with that… do you think you might… settle down?” Simone propped her elbow on the counter, dropping her chin into her hand.

  “Maybe. I don’t know. There’s… other reasons that it’s best to just… keep it casual.” I shrugged, then didn’t say anything else, hoping that she would take the hint that this was a topic I wanted to leave alone.

  She gave me a little nod of her head, letting me know she did, then reached to place her hand over mine. “Okay. But I want you to be careful. Viv is gorgeous, and big-hearted, and smart, and funny… hell, if I wasn’t straight, I’d want her. She’s a really easy person to fall for, Carter, and for what it’s worth, I would love to see the two of you together. But if that’s not what you’re trying to do… just be careful.”

  I didn’t know how to tell her that her warning was just a little too late, so I simply nodded, then reached up to scratch my eyebrow. “Monie… I know I don’t need to tell you this, but, since I know you’re friends with Viv too… this stays between us, right?”

  “Of course, Carter. I won’t interfere… too much.”

  “Simone!”

  “What? I’m just being honest with you. I will absolutely not tell her anything you’ve said, because that’s between us, but if she comes to me about it, I’m going to give her the best advice I can, just like I would with any other friend. Just like I do with you. Right?”

  Reluctantly, I nodded. I trusted that Simone would keep her word.

  “Oh, and Carter?” she continued, gripping my hand.

  “Yeah?”

  “If you hurt her… it’s gonna be you and me, pregnant belly and all.”

  “Trust me,” I said, chuckling as I draped an arm over her shoulder. “That’s the last thing I want to do.”

  “I’ll only be gone a week.”

  That’s what I told Carter when I left his apartment to board my transcontinental flight to Europe to visit my parents. It was a trip my mother insisted on, shortly after my birthday, and she swore my father wanted me there too, but I was unconvinced. He never did call to apologize for not calling me on my birthday, but he had called to congratulate me on the impressive numbers I’d done for the last quarter at Guilty Pleasures. So… happy birthday to me, I guess.

  My mother brought a car to the airport to pick me up, and the first thing she did upon seeing me settle into the seat across from her was break into laughter. “My dear Vivi… if I did not know better, I would think you enjoyed upsetting your father. But then again, you are very much like me… so I take that back. I know you enjoy upsetting him.”

  “Everything I do does not revolve around him.”

  That only made her laugh harder. “Vivi… hasn’t it always? Martin is your father, of course your actions will reflect him in some way, but mon trésor… when will you stop acting out to get his attention? The piercings, the pictures… you realize it does not endear him to you, no?”

  I stared out of the window. “It is not about endearment, it is about ownership. My own, no one else’s. Besides, he does not know about the piercings… unless you have said something?” I turned to her as
she shook her head.

  “Of course not. Not until I am trying to kill the man. But this one, Vivi, you cannot hide.”

  “I have no desire to.” I retorted.

  She smiled. “As you shouldn’t. It looks good on you. But… darling — and I know you say this is not about your father — you have to understand that your father… he is not capable of giving you what you seek from him.”

  “I seek nothing from him.”

  “Love? Acceptance? Validation? None of those things? They are the only reason I see for a thirty year old woman to return home with a new hole in her face, but I have been wrong a few times in my life.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Mère, please.”

  She laughed the entire way home, to my parents’ private house in the Western suburbs of Paris, then wished me luck as I knocked on the door to my father’s home office. It wasn’t until then that dread really did settle over me. When he came to the door, the first place his eyes fell was on the tiny, brand new stud decorating the side of my nose.

  It was my birthday gift to myself, something I’d been wanting to do since my early teens. But, not wanting to face the ire of my father, I put it off, opting instead for the piercings that would only be visible to a carefully — or so I liked to think — selected few. He’d always been adamant, no tattoos, no piercings, he couldn’t have me walking around looking like a “freak”. But I had no desire to do anything extreme, and it was my body anyway, so after Carter finished giving me a very happy birthday, I’d dragged him along with me down to Eddie’s shop. Even though Eddie wasn’t there, his artists took very good care of me, and I was happy with the miniscule ball of silver that now dotted my nose.

  My father was not.

  His lip curled up in disgust, but he said nothing, choosing instead to look at me with the same contempt he might give something stuck to the bottom of his shoe.

  “Hello, father. It is good to see you,” I said, putting on a false cheerfulness to distract from the fact that my heart was pumping with a horrible sort of adrenaline as I braced myself for when he finally started speaking.