by Alice Moore
“I am breaking up with her because of you. Not because of some silly ideology that I wanted you from the moment you came up to me at that auction. You’re beautiful, refined, but it’s not necessarily those qualities that draw me to you. You went out of your way to help me, a man you didn’t know, because you knew Anna was trouble. I told you before- Nash and Natalie are having a baby after 4 months. They knew. Just like I know… just like I suspect you know.” He was so certain, so straightforward, that my throat clogged and my mind stalled. Staring at the seriousness etched onto William’s face, I could only force a nod. His compliments went over my head, focusing instead on his last, impactful words.
“I- I know.” Stuttering lightly, I licked my lips heavily as a hard throb beat through my body. “I know…”
Chapter Eight: Risha
Staring at the back of Cynthia’s head as she cuddled with Martin on the couch, I drew my brows together sharply. Sipping my seltzer water through a straw, my lips dragged in a frown as I watched through narrowed eyes while my best friend paused her movie.
“Staring at me like that won’t get you out of going to this dinner, Risha. Martin agreed to carry your ass to the car, so just go get ready. You’re going regardless if you wear a nice dress or those t-rex pajamas you got on.” Groaning loudly, I dropped into a kitchen chair to cross my arms over my chest like a child that didn’t get what she wanted.
And what I wanted was to not go to this dinner; that desire had only strengthened after this morning.
“It’s almost 5:30… and I’m not lying about dragging your ass to the car. This is your fault because you couldn’t grow the balls to tell William. Now you have to fix your mistake.” Cynthia drove her last nail into my coffin, and I simmered over my mistakes since meeting William. Every opportunity I took trying to tell him who I was had been a dud, and now my mother’s introduction dinner was precious minutes away. In a half hour I’d be leaving, and I glanced down at myself with a scowl. These T-Rex pajamas were my favorite, but I would never wear them to a restaurant like the Wendel.
“Ugh! Fine!” Pushing myself up roughly, I stomped towards the stairs while Cynthia put her movie back on. Anger and shame heated my face, and I silently cursed my weak will as I stormed up the stairs. “But I don’t like it!”
“I don’t care!” The sing-song quality in Cynthia’s voice irritated my ears, and I grumbled under my breath just to release some hot air.
Time seemed to fly past me, and I touched up my eyeliner before my best friend’s reflection appeared deep in my mirror. Frowning at her, I set my pencil back in its case to rip the zipper shut with a jerk. Slowly her eyes scanned my form, and she let out an appreciative hum as I straightened.
“Your tits look great in that dress. Hell, you look great in that dress. I bet William will be too busy drooling to remember you lied to him.” The assurance did nothing to untie the knots in my belly, and I smoothed the black fabric absently. Nibbling my bottom lip, I took one last look at my curled hair before stepping away from my vanity. Cynthia smiled pleasantly at me, and I only offered a weak upturn back before taking a deep breath.
“I really don’t like you right now, Cynthia.” Even as I spoke I realized Cynthia was wearing something nice, and I arched a brow in question. “Where are you going? I thought you were going to stay here and watch movies?”
“We decided to come with you. For moral support.” Her bland answer caused goosebumps to rise on my skin, and her smile turned wicked as she pushed off the door frame. “Plus, I want to watch your mom get totally humiliated in front of really rich people.”
Keeping my mouth shut, I didn’t bother to delve any deeper into the subject before grabbing my purse. My steps were stiff, and I slid my bare feet into a pair of low heels that rested by my door before turning off the light. Watching Cynthia’s form-fitting dress sway as she wandered down the hall, I focused on the movement instead of the nerves tingling my palms.
In the time it took to blink we were stopped in front of a valet, and I scrambled to find where the time went as I climbed out of the back seat. My mind was in tatters, and I clenched my jaw tightly when I glanced at my phone. We were five minutes late, but any hope I had that William decided to ditch and dump my mother by phone vanished when I caught sight of him through the giant picture windows. Taking a moment to admire his clean, pressed suit, I couldn’t help but frown at the tense set of his shoulders.
My mother sat across from him, and judging by the content smile on her face she didn’t suspect what was going to happen.
Relax. Smile. Hope William doesn’t hate me. Relax. Smile. Hope William doesn’t hate me… Repeating the mantra over again in my head, I squared my shoulders before Cynthia practically yanked me through the front door of the restaurant. Instantly I could see why William didn’t like this place; everything was so formal, so black and white. Linens covered the small, intimate, square tables, and there weren’t even any booths. This was a restaurant for special occasions, but this was anything but special.
Relax. Smile. Hope William doesn’t hate me.
Wandering deeper onto the floor, I weaved past couples and businessmen alike before my mother caught sight of me. Her make up was flawless, and if her smile didn’t hide a monster I would say she was pretty. Pushing herself up, she smoothed her cream-colored dress before opening her painted lips.
“Marishka-“ Right before my eyes William twisted, his face a mask of confusion that tightened my chest. Sucking in a shallow breath, I forced a smile on my face even as my skin crawled from his roaming, narrowed gaze. “I’m so glad you made it. I want to introduce you to-“
“William.” So carefully I tried to mask the pain that rushed into my lungs, making it hard to breathe. Standing at the edge of the table, I had a clear view of the betrayal that rippled across William’s face before he masked his expression. “I know who he is.”
“Have a seat. We were just about to order some wine. You drink white, right?” My stomach roiled at the idea of food, and I slipped into an uncomfortable chair before shaking my head. Next to me my mother laughed, high pitched and nervous that she’d made a mistake. “I wanted to formally introduce you. William, this is my daughter Marishka.”
Effortlessly my mother launched into some else, glossing over her error as if it didn’t matter. Flickering to her, William’s gaze narrowed into fine points as his jaw swiveled under his beard. The air was heavy, threatening to suffocate me, and it seemed to stretch on forever until he finally spoke up.
“I’m breaking up with you.” Whirling to my mom, my wide eyes took in her shock as William’s words slowly settled on the table between us all. My heart raced in my chest, and I clutched my bag tightly in my lap as I held my breath.
“Wh- what? What do you mean? Wi-“ Holding up one hand to silence her, William frowned deeply while dizziness began to spin my vision.
“I said ‘I’m breaking up with you’, Anna. I’m done. You never once mentioned you had a daughter. That’s something you bring up on the third date. Now, leave.” The pure power in William’s voice could shatter glass, and it rattled up my spine to rest at the base of my skull. Holding myself very still, I watched in slow motion as my mother debated trying to salvage this situation or do as she was told.
A long, heavy moment passed by on pins and needles before she huffed, pushing herself out of her chair with a wiggle. Red bled into her face, and I pursed my lips together at how clownish she looked with her makeup.
“Fine. If that’s how you want to be. Come on, Marishka.” I didn’t move; I couldn’t bring myself to even bat an eyelash, but my mother didn’t notice when William waved her off.
“You go. She stays. If you want to make a scene, I have security standing by to escort you off the premises. I won’t tell you to leave again, Anna.” Turning to William, I held my breath as I really looked at him. His expression was fierce, his posture screaming dominance, and I locked my thighs together under the table. The difference in him now compared to
this morning was immense, and he downright glared at my mother until she started to shuffle away.
Even after my mother had left the building we were silent, and I desperately tried to come up with something to say. The lump in my throat stopped all words, leaving me staring at William through unblinking eyes. When his gaze met mine, my heart skipped a beat at the fire I saw there, and I leaned back when he reached across the narrow, longish table. Finally blinking when his fingertips brushed my chin, I shivered as he caressed my cheek.
“Why didn’t you tell me, Risha?” William’s voice didn’t break, but the thread of betrayal in it was thick, and I shook my head silently. Blinking hard, the actions combined caused thick droplets to fall from my lashes, and he pursed his lips together to catch one on his fingertip. “I’m sorry. Maybe it would’ve been easier for you if I came on weaker. You did try- I can see that.”
“I- I am so- so, so sorry, William.” Squeezing the apology out, I clenched my jaw together before William effortlessly transferred himself to the seat directly across from me. Gently taking a thick, cloth napkin, he cupped my chin before carefully dabbing away the few tears that had escaped my eyes.
“I wish you had told me the truth from the get-go, but- I’m not angry with you, Risha. Don’t cry. I can understand why you did this the way you did.” My surprise must’ve been written on my face, and William smiled tenderly before pulling away completely. Left cold, goosebumps rose on my arms and across my chest as I struggled to calm myself. “I have been in a few relationships, and I can’t say I would’ve done differently. In case you’ve forgotten, I’m twice your age. That means twice the life experience.”
“But I lied…” A mere whisper, my admission crushed my chest, and I reached shakily for the glass of ice water sitting in front of me. All the while William didn’t take his eyes off me, and I took a few deep gulps before he spoke up.
“I am mad about that, but not about what you lied about. What you said this morning, about looking the mirror and seeing your mother- I understand that now. I also acknowledge the fact that this is at least partly my fault. I could’ve tried harder to figure out who you were, but I didn’t. I could’ve laid off a little- let you feel more comfortable telling me… I didn’t realize how overwhelming it was for me to tell you I wanted you when I was in a relationship with your mother.”
“Oh- no! I didn’t… take it that way… I just- after the theater, I was trying to figure out if my mother actually liked you. Six months is a long time for her… she usually tells me before the first date.” Setting the low, glass tumbler down, I blushed hard at how stupid I sounded; as if it was acceptable that I expected my mother to tell me about her boyfriends. “I thought maybe she did, but then you told me you’re younger than her… and that kind of makes sense. It’d give her the confidence to try to get under your skin.”
“She’s never been under my skin…” Staring directly at me, William’s firm words tickled my spine, and he held my gaze for a few moments before continuing. “Do you want to get out of here? I know a place downtown that serves amazing sushi.”
The offer knocked the air from my lungs, and I sucked in a starving breath before William pushed himself to his feet. Rounding the table, he took my hand to help me up without asking. His pushiness only sent a pulse of heat through me, and I followed him towards the exit on stiff legs.
“White wine… who the Hell likes white wine?” Grumbling to himself, William tugged me out of the restaurant to take a deep, piercing breath before turning to me. “Don’t ever lie to me again, Risha.”
“I- I honestly didn’t think you’d take it well…” Hanging my head in shame, I tried to pull my hand from his. Instead he tightened his grip, sending warmth up my arm to invade my chest. Peeking up at him, I pursed my lips together at the frown that painted his face.
“I’m not taking it well, Risha. I’m hurt that you lied to me about how you knew Anna… but I’m going to punish you another way than storming off.” Jerking me to his chest, William held my arm above my head as a gasp flew from my throat, and I stared up at him with wide eyes. “I’m going to do the most depraved things to you, Risha- I’m going to do everything I’ve wanted to do to you since I kissed you at that bar. And it won’t be fun… it’ll be exhausting.”
The hairs on the back of my neck stood straight up at the promise in William’s voice, and I flexed in his grasp. Smoldering coals settled in my abdomen, and my core throbbed as he slung his arm around my waist to hold me close. My breath hitched in my throat, and his eyes bored holes into mine as they came closer and closer. Fluttering weakly, my eyelids shuttered together when he brushed his lips against mine in a kiss that told of many things to come.
Chapter Nine: William
“You know, if Anna had even a little bit to redeem herself, you might’ve become my step-father.” We’d been driving quietly, but Risha’s words hit me like a brick just as the sushi restaurant came into view. Glancing over at her, I watched with narrowed eyes while she giggled, red bleeding into her face. “I’m just saying…”
“Is that your way of saying you want to call me ‘Daddy’?” My lips twitched in a smirk, and I let out a laugh when Risha went still. Just that tiny pause was enough to affirm my suggestion, and I reached over to grab her face. Her eyes were wide when they met mine, sparkling with excitement and desire that heated my blood and thickened my tongue. “I’d gladly take you up on that, baby girl.”
“You’re different…” Risha’s soft breath swirled around my wrist, and I released her to put my hand back on the wheel. Easing off the gas to turn into a large, somewhat crowded parking lot, I only shook my head at her observation.
“I’m not different, Risha. You just haven’t seen this part of me before… I haven’t seen this part of me in a long time. I forgot how good it feels.” Sliding my car into an empty space, I pulled the emergency brake to lean back in my seat. My mind ran through the events of the day, starting with my decision to break up with Anna. She was the physical embodiment of a wall inside me, and now that I’d broken it down I felt light. “Does it scare you?”
Staring out the windshield at the dark side of the building, I hid my surprise at the realization that I didn’t actually care if I scared Risha. Pulling my brows together, I pursed my lips into a thin line; she could be uncertain, but she’d get over it. That line of thinking had laid dormant for so long it was alien as it floated through my mind, but her voice popped my inner thought bubble.
“No. Honestly… I think if you weren’t, you’d be a little boring. At least for me. I haven’t been in a relationship since high school, and I’m 25 now. I don’t want safe. I want wild and hot and passionate." Thoughtfulness permeated Risha’s voice, and I let my head loll to stare at her. She radiated a maturity that was rare for her age, but after everything it was expected. Terrified of turning into her mother, she tried to put herself through college only to drop out when her best friend had cancer.
All innocence was lost.
“What did you do to pay for college? Did you get a scholarship?” The embarrassment on Risha’s face vanished, and the crease between my brows deepened. Changing the subject was easy; I didn’t want to talk about all of the hot, wild, passionate deeds I would do to her. Especially not when it was so far off.
“I was a stripper. I took pole dancing lessons to help me stay in shape, and I worked places where I could keep my clothes on. But it paid really well, and I did it until two years ago right before Anthony hired me. Cynthia had a lot of medical bills she couldn’t pay, and she couldn’t work. It was tax-free money- thousands of dollars a night. For an unsupported woman going for business management, that was the best way to go. Cynthia got a scholarship for biology, but she lost it when she had to drop out.”
“You’re serious? Why didn’t someone help you?” The question flew from my lips before I could stop it, and Risha let out a bark of laughter that gyrated my eardrums. A rueful smile twisted her expression, and she sighed harshly before ans
wering me.
“Who’d help me? My mother was never around, and if she was she didn’t have time for me. She was too busy with her boyfriends. Cynthia’s parents didn’t have anything they could spare. My teachers didn’t care about my education because I only went to college because Cynthia went. I told you- I don’t like working. I’ve never wanted to work. No one wanted to help someone that was basically riding a scholarship student.”
“… What do you want to do, then?” It took me a long, heavy moment to find my voice, and I watched a careful, calculated longing spread on Risha’s face. She went through so many emotions, and all of them showed. The transformation was fascinating, and I reached out absently to stroke her jaw and neck.
“I want kids…” Her quiet admission resonated inside me like a song finally finding harmony, and she met my gaze with a firmness that told me this wasn’t a hasty decision. “I want so many kids I can’t keep track of them all. And I want to give them what I never had. I want my children to hate me because I show them how much I love them. I want them to go do great things, but not because they’re afraid.”
The underlying message blared from Risha’s deep, soulful gaze, and my heart stuttered in my chest. She’s my parallel. Blinking hard at the thought, time seemed to slow down as I wrapped my hand around her neck. The click of her seatbelt echoed through my car, and I pulled her to straddle my lap. Her dress didn’t tear, and I cupped her bare ass with my free hand as she smashed her lips on mine.
