by Helen Brooks
Kate shook her head. ‘Not for sale. It’s mine.’
‘Just like Jack and that great house of his.’ Tom followed her into the kitchen to call Bran inside and sat down at the table with the dog at his feet while Kate made coffee. ‘But I’ll say the same to you as I said to him; bricks and mortar are poor substitutes for a loving relationship.’
‘True, but they cause a lot less pain.’
Tom nodded slowly. ‘I grant you that.’
‘You know Jack asked me to marry him?’
‘Just the bare facts. He said you refused, but he wouldn’t say another word.’
Kate heaved a sigh as she brought the tray over to the table. ‘I hoped we could stay friends but Jack isn’t having any.’
Tom looked her in the eye. ‘This is the second time you’ve turned Jack down, remember.’
‘I know.’ She looked at him in appeal. ‘I hope it doesn’t change things between you and me.’
‘Not in the slightest, love.’
To prove it, Tom Logan stayed with Kate until Bran grew restless. ‘I’d better take this chap home. Shall I give Jack a message?’
Kate shook her head sadly. ‘I doubt that he’d want one.’
Later that afternoon she thought for a brief, hopeful minute or two that she was wrong when a familiar florist’s van drew up outside her house. Her spirits soared when she was given a basket of spring flowers but took an instant nosedive when she read the card. The flowers were from Richard Forster. Not Jack.
‘Kate, your strategy worked like a charm. With heartfelt thanks, RF.’
Too bad she couldn’t think of a strategy to improve her own life, she thought grimly.
A few days later Kate drove to collect Joanna for the Easter vacation.
‘I’m dying to get out of my uniform,’ said Jo, as they left the school car park. ‘Are we having lunch on the way?’
‘Would I expect you to survive if we didn’t?’ Kate teased. ‘But not the posh hotel today; you can make do with a burger somewhere.’
‘Cool! We don’t get burgers in school.’
‘At those fees I should hope not.’ Kate glanced sideways to see a worried frown on Jo’s face. ‘What’s up?’
The dark eyes gazed at her anxiously. ‘I know it’s terribly expensive to keep me there. Can you really afford it?’
‘I don’t have to, love. When you were a baby Robert took out an education insurance which covered your fees right up until you leave the place.’ Kate patted her hand. ‘There may be a few extras along the way due to cost of living and school trips and so on, but I can cope with that.’
‘Can’t you take the extras out of my money?’
‘If it was absolutely necessary I could, but it’s not, so chill, OK?’
Joanna Sutton was at the stage where she was an adult one minute and a child the next, but the child predominated as she raced through the rooms in Park Crescent, exclaiming in delight as she went.
‘My room looks great! And I love the sitting room now it’s furnished. Is that the paint colour I picked?’
‘It certainly is. Your Coral Porcelain turned out well.’
Jo gazed round the room in approval, then turned a determined glance on Kate. ‘I’ve got something to say.’ She paused and took a deep breath. ‘The thing is, I should have said it ages ago.’
‘Spit it out, then,’ said Kate in alarm. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing. I just want to say thank you,’ blurted Jo. ‘For taking me on, I mean.’
‘Oh, Joanna! No thanks necessary,’ Kate assured her, weak with relief. ‘I’m only too happy to “take you on”.’
‘You really mean that? I’ve been worried. You know, because you gave up your job and sold your flat and—’
‘Hey! Let’s get something straight here. I was about to resign from my job anyway. And I sold the flat because I inherited this house.’
‘But you only came to live in it because I didn’t want to stay in London after Mum and Dad died,’ Jo reminded her.
‘True,’ Kate agreed and smiled into the anxious elfin face. ‘But it was no sacrifice. I love the house and, though I’m sorry for the tragic circumstances that made it necessary, it’s a great big bonus to have you sharing it with me. OK?’
‘OK.’ Joanna heaved a heartfelt sigh of relief.
‘Right. Now you’ve got that off your chest ring Grandma and tell her you’re home.’
Jo made her call, and reported that her grandparents were looking forward to her visit. ‘I’ll try not to wear them out,’ she added, grinning.
‘Good. We’re having supper with Anna and Ben tonight, by the way.’
Jo beamed. ‘Great! Is Anna OK?’
‘Blooming. She’s dying to see you. Pop upstairs for a bath while I unpack for you.’
‘I’m supposed to do it myself,’ Jo said, pulling a face.
Kate tapped her nose. ‘I won’t tell if you won’t! Now go.’
A minute later there was a scream of delight from upstairs and Jo came hurtling into the kitchen in her briefs and the unnecessary minuscule bra she’d asked for because all her friends had one.
‘The cropped jeans and stripy top in the wardrobe,’ she panted, ‘I just love them, Kate—thanks. Can I wear them tonight?’
‘That was my plan. Now scoot.’
Jo tore back upstairs and returned later, the gleaming hair brushed, her slender, long-legged body graceful in denims and pink and lavender top. ‘Well?’ she demanded, doing a twirl. ‘Do I look cool or what?’
Kate blinked at the transformation from schoolgirl into something else entirely. ‘I don’t know about cool, but you certainly look grown up,’ she said with misgiving.
Jo punched the air in delight, then stopped, the joy suddenly draining from her face.
‘What now?’
‘I forgot for a minute,’ she whispered guiltily.
‘And so you should,’ said Kate with emphasis. ‘Your mother and father would want that.’
‘I hope so. Because I’m much better lately. I hardly cry at all. Do you?’
Kate shook her head. ‘Elizabeth disapproved of tears.’
‘I know! When I fell down when I was little she used to dust me off and tell me to stop making a fuss.’ Jo’s mouth drooped. ‘But I wouldn’t like her to think I didn’t grieve for her—and for Daddy.’
‘Darling, you’ll never forget them, and you’re bound to miss both of them terribly at times, but they would want you to stop grieving now and get on with your life.’ Kate took her hand. ‘They made me your official guardian, remember, so you know they trusted me to take care of you. And I will.’
‘I know that, Kate.’ Jo smiled valiantly. ‘What time are we due at Anna’s?’
Joanna slept late next morning, and Kate, awake early as she always seemed to be lately, got up quietly and had finished her morning’s work before Jo appeared in the study doorway, yawning widely.
‘Sorry I slept so long, Kate.’
‘Did you enjoy your lie in?’
Jo nodded with enthusiasm, pushing the hair out of her eyes. ‘But if you want me to get up earlier I will. Mum would never let me stay in bed after nine.’
Kate switched off her computer and got up. ‘Let’s have some brunch.’
‘The thing is, Jo,’ she said, when they were tucking into bacon and eggs, ‘in my opinion you get enough rules and regulations in school. That doesn’t mean you’ve got carte blanche to run wild at home now you’ve only got me to answer to, but you’re definitely entitled to a lie in on your first morning.’
‘Thanks, Kate. I had such a great time with Anna and Ben, but I was really tired by the time we came home,’ said Jo. ‘But you didn’t have a long sleep, and you’ve been working all morning.’
‘Which means we can now go out to play,’ said Kate promptly. ‘Anna is meeting us at two to go shopping.’
‘I enjoyed that enormously,’ said Anna later, while they were waiting for tea and cakes in her favourite coffee shop. ‘I adore spen
ding other people’s money.’
‘You spent some of your own, too,’ Kate reminded her.
‘Anna just had to buy the baby something,’ said Jo, and smiled in satisfaction. ‘We did, too.’
‘Hard to resist,’ agreed Kate. ‘If I were any sort of godmother-to-be I’d be knitting those cute little white things instead of buying them, but I know my limitations.’
Anna chuckled. ‘You’re off the hook—both grandmothers are knitting furiously as we speak. Oops, I almost forgot.’ She fished an envelope out of her handbag and handed it to Joanna. ‘This is for you.’
Jo’s eyes lit up like lamps when she took out a party invitation. ‘Josh and Leo’s birthday—it’s a disco!’ she added in excitement. ‘I can wear some of my new stuff. What do you think—denim mini-skirt or white jeans?’
‘Jeans!’ said Kate and Anna in unison.
‘The Careys are transforming their barn into a nightclub for the party, brave souls that they are,’ said Anna. ‘Ben’s volunteered his services as extra doorman, and you can spend the evening with me, Auntie.’
With Joanna at home, life was no longer flat for Kate. The days took on an agreeable pattern, with a walk in the park every day as soon as Kate switched off the computer, and some kind of outing in the afternoon. On the first Sunday Kate put a chicken in to roast before the usual walk with Joanna in the park, and waved, smiling, as she saw Tom Logan coming along the lake path towards them with Bran.
Kate made the introductions as they met up with him,eye-ing Tom in alarm. At close quarters he looked pale and drawn, in such contrast to his usual health and vitality that she took his hand to feel his pulse surreptitiously as he kissed her cheek. But his smile was warm as he turned to Joanna.
‘I’m very glad to meet you, my dear. This handsome fellow is Bran, my son’s dog.’
‘How do you do, Mr Logan?’ said Jo, and bent towards the dog in yearning. ‘Will he let me stroke him?’
‘As much as you like, pet. He laps it up.’ Tom turned to Kate. ‘Joanna’s with you for the Easter holiday?’
‘Most of it. I’m driving her to Worcester to stay with her grandparents later this afternoon, but only for a couple of days. She’s invited to a party on Saturday.’
‘It’s a disco,’ Joanna informed him.
He smiled indulgently. ‘I’m sure you’ll have a really good time, sweetheart. Are you going along as chaperon, Kate?’
She laughed. ‘And spoil the fun? No way; I’m just the chauffeur. Come back and have some coffee with us, Tom. Or better still, stay and share our roast chicken.’
He shook his head, his eyes on Joanna as she yearned over the dog. ‘That’s very kind of you, but Jack’s due back from London in time for supper and I’m chef.’
‘Are you sure you won’t come back and just rest for a moment first?’ asked Kate in an undertone. ‘You don’t look at all well.’
‘I overdid it on the golf course yesterday, that’s all, love. If you like dogs, Joanna,’ he added, ‘I’ll bring Bran to see you another time.’
‘I could walk him in the park for you,’ she offered eagerly.
‘I may take you up on that.’ He turned to Kate and, to her surprise, hugged her close again as he said goodbye.
‘Come and see us soon and, in the meantime, go easy on the golf.’ She kissed his cheek affectionately.
‘Goodbye, Mr Logan.’ Jo bent to stroke the wagging dog one last time. ‘See you later, Bran.’
Kate sent Joanna upstairs to pack while she checked on the vegetables roasting in the oven with the chicken, and then stood gazing out of the window.
‘What’s the matter?’ said Jo, returning with a holdall.
‘I’m really quite worried about Mr Logan. He looked very unwell—and normally he’s as fit as a fiddle.’
‘I hope he’s not ill. I liked him—and I just adored Bran.’ Joanna sighed. ‘I love dogs, but Mum didn’t, so I couldn’t have one.’
‘Neither could I, same reason,’ said Kate, and got up briskly. ‘Right then, let’s get this lunch on the table. And no seconds today,’ she warned. ‘Grandma will probably have an enormous tea waiting for you.’
The drive to Worcester through the afternoon sunshine was pleasant, and the Suttons so welcoming that Kate gave in to their urging and spent an hour with them before leaving. And was glad she had when she got home. Without Jo the house seemed deadly quiet. Kate rang her to report in then stretched out on the chaise with a book and the Sunday papers. And wondered how Jack had spent his weekend.
At that precise moment Jack Logan was on his way home from London in determined mood. He’d spent the previous evening with a woman who was attractive, intelligent and very good company when their various commitments allowed them to spend time together. Hester Morris was a high-flyer with a successful career in advertising, and outspoken about having no desire for marriage and children. He liked her very much, and enjoyed their no-strings relationship. But their first evening together since Kate’s reappearance had been oddly unsatisfactory and, cursing himself for a fool, Jack had pleaded an oncoming migraine after dinner and rung for a taxi. Hester had taken it in her stride and Jack had kissed her cheek, promised to get in touch soon, and went back to his own bed to avoid sharing Hester’s. He’d never had a migraine in his life, but on the spur of the moment it had been the only excuse he could think of to avoid hurting someone he valued as a friend.
As he turned off the motorway to make for home Jack looked truth in the face. Life with Kate for a friend was a hell of a sight more bearable than life without her. He’d call round tonight and tell her that, and hope to God she hadn’t changed her mind since he saw her last. Her niece would be home for the Easter vacation by now, of course, but the little girl would surely be in bed if he left it late enough. He smiled sardonically. After forcing himself to keep away from Kate for weeks, his welcome was unlikely to be warm whatever time it was. After supper he would ask his father to keep Bran until tomorrow so he could stay with Kate long enough to make his peace—if she let him through the door.
Kate had just laid a tray with a chicken sandwich and a cup of coffee when the bell rang. Her heart took a flying leap against her ribs as she went into the hall. Jack Logan was the only man tall enough to identify through the fanlight over the front door. She clamped down on a rush of delight and smiled coolly as she opened the door.
‘Why, hello, Jack. This is a surprise.’
‘Let me in, please,’ he said brusquely.
‘Why?’ she demanded, angered by his peremptory tone.
‘I have something to show you.’
‘You’re interrupting my supper.’
‘Are you alone?’
‘Yes.’
‘Good, because we need to talk. This is important, Kate.’
‘It had better be. Close the door behind you.’
Jack followed her into the sitting room, eyeing the tray on the Pembroke table. ‘One sandwich? Not much of a supper.’
‘Big lunch.’ Kate stood with arms folded. ‘But you didn’t come here to discuss my eating habits, so show me whatever you want to show me—’
‘And get out,’ he finished for her.
‘I hope I wouldn’t be as rude as that.’ She looked up at him, wishing she felt as indifferent to him as she was trying to make out. He obviously hadn’t had time for a haircut lately and, in a battered trench coat over a crew neck sweater and cords, Jack looked so much like the young man she’d once fallen in love with it was hard to main tain her distance. But something in his demeanour was deeply disquieting.
‘I had dinner with Dad before I came here. He asked me to show you these.’ He handed her an envelope. ‘Look inside.’
Kate looked at him questioningly, but Jack’s expression gave nothing away. She withdrew two photographs from the envelope and sat down with a bump, feeling the colour drain from her face. Both studies were of the same girl, the first at Joanna’s age, the second as a radiant, smiling bride in her twenties.
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Jack tossed his raincoat on a chair and put a hand on her shoulder. ‘Kate, are you all right?’
‘No, I’m not all right,’ she snapped, her eyes glued to the photographs. The girl in them had dark, curling hair, but otherwise the likeness to Joanna was unmistakeable. ‘Who is this?’ Though there was only one woman it could be.
‘My mother. My father met her when the first photograph was taken. They were in school together.’ Jack breathed in deeply. ‘He thought he was seeing things when he met Joanna in the park this morning.’
Kate nodded slowly, her eyes on the photographs shaking in her unsteady hand. ‘So that’s why he looked so ill.’
‘He idolised my mother. We both did.’ Jack’s deep,authoritative voice grew husky. ‘You know she died when I was fifteen. It took me years to get over losing her. But Dad never has. Coming face to face with Joanna today was a hell of a shock to him.’ He sat on the end of the chaise and put an ungentle finger under Kate’s chin to tilt her face up to his. ‘When were you going to tell me that we had a daughter?’
CHAPTER ELEVEN
‘IWASN’T going to—ever.’ Kate pushed his hand away and looked up at him with hostility. ‘Because in the eyes of the world she’s not our daughter,she’s my niece, Jack. All the time she was growing up I had to stand back and look on from the sidelines while my child called someone else Mummy.’
His fists clenched. ‘Why in God’s name didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?’ he demanded, glaring at her.
She glared back in hot resentment. ‘I didn’t realise I was for a while! There was a lot going on in my life at the time: the move to London, getting to grips with the new job,living alone in digs.’ She wrenched her eyes away. ‘And pining for you, Jack.’
Kate had put her sickness and weariness down to the changes in her life at first, but eventually she bought a test kit that confirmed her fears. At the time the Suttons had been packing up, ready for the move to London. Kate went home that weekend, officially to give them a helping hand, in reality desperate to contact Jack and tell him about the baby. But Elizabeth met her at the bus station with the shattering news that Jack Logan had married Dawn Taylor the previous weekend, and Kate’s life fell apart.