I groaned from the touch. Disgusting. I could smell the pheromones coursing through Jameson mixed with a little fear of getting caught. That was all I needed.
Adrenaline spiked, and my shadows floated around me, keeping their distance, waiting for me to give them the go-ahead.
His hand traveled further until he found the hem of my dress. He pressed his body harder into mine.
His stank breath was vomit-inducing, and just the very thought that he believed he was going to get away with this had me pissed off. I wasn’t a fan of anyone laying an unwarranted hand on anyone.
Hypocrite, I know.
“I seen you and the big feller cheatin’.” His fingers fumbled with my panties, and he started a nice, slow dry humping pace. It would have been great if I wanted it, and he hit his mark.
“Now, Jameson, you’re just upset because I beat Winchester. Accusing me of cheating is beneath you. Didn’t your t-ball coach teach you to be a good sport and shake hands, not be a sore loser?” He shifted me to get better access, and one hand clamped on the back of my neck. He would’ve fallen over if it wasn’t for me holding us both up. “I think you’ve had one too many drinks. You’re missing my clit, asshole. If you’re gonna try, at least make it good.” He yanked me back and slammed me against the wall again. I huffed a laugh. He was so weak it was pathetic.
“Shut up, bitch.” He undid his pants and freed himself. He took long strokes, rubbing himself against my ass, and that’s when I had had enough. He was going to ruin my dress.
I unleashed the shadows, covering us both in a thick funnel. Jameson gasped, his grip on me faltering as I started my search into his past.
“Enough,” Coal’s voice vibrated through the empty hallway as a wave of voices blared when he opened the door. He pulled Jameson from me and tossed him to the side as gently as he could. Still, the drunk knocked into the wall, his head thudding horribly. He was out cold.
Coal turned to me, looking me up and down, concern plastered on his face like I was some damsel in distress. “Are you alright?” He caught a glimpse of my dress hiked up, his eyes flashing with anger as he worked to straighten it, hiding me from the world. I jerked out of his touch.
“What do you think? Of course, I’m fine. I had it handled. Do you seriously think I would let some scum human take advantage of me?” Just like that, he went from the knight in shining armor to a statue with a face full of disdain. I caught a little bit of hurt in his eyes as well, but I disregarded it.
“Have you not learned anything by me being here? You’re supposed to stop the senseless killing.”
“Senseless killing? He was trying to rape me, mug me.”
He chuffed. “As if he could get away with that. You should’ve pushed him off and left, not tried to kill, right here in the open in a bar full of fear to siphon. You could have exposed yourself. Killed nearly a hundred people, then what?”
“So, I’m just going to let some creep keep living?”
He shook his head in disbelief. “Don’t act like you had good intentions. I heard you moaning, egging him on so you could get off on sucking the life out of him.” Coal’s voice was all sorts of poisonous.
I couldn’t take his morality any longer. I didn’t care if he had a point. I was pissed and tired and in need of a pizza. Not to mention my shadows were itching for a good feed as well.
I called the shadows and placed myself in the car. I wasn’t going to the club tonight, not when the mood had taken such an annoying turn. Instead, I was just going to go home and order a pizza for the second night in a row and lock myself in my room.
Childish? Hell yeah. But I was embarrassed and annoyed that Coal had seen right through me. Righteous ass.
5
I woke up sometime the next afternoon before my alarm, sun blaring, with Coal’s words running through my head. Asshole.
I’m a Shadow, the only one of my kind, not some sweet little naive human girl with a heart-shaped backpack and a tutu. I was a mean, shadow-toting, fear-eating bitch. The things I had seen in my victims’ heads, even those considered to be good souls, would make Hitler himself cry.
It was pissing me off, even more so that I still knew nothing about him but had verbal diarrhea and told him everything he needed to know about me like I was suddenly an open book.
I tossed on a ragged, black band t-shirt and jeans, letting my neon orange hair free flow around my face. I wasn’t in the mood for makeup, but I at least washed my face and brushed my teeth. My morning breath was kicking. Not that it mattered, I wouldn’t be kissing anyone today, but I couldn’t let these pearly whites go yellow either. Human bodies needed an annoying amount of up-keep.
Coffee wafted through the apartment as the door whipped opened, and Coal ducked his way through. In his hands, he held two drinks and a bag that ran thin with grease stains. He raised his brows with a smirk widening his lips.
“What do you want?” I asked, all sweet like chocolate and roses.
“I’m hoping that an iced latte and a sorry will cut it,” he said expectantly. An apology? Really? Since when did he care if I was mad at him?
I couldn’t quite get a read on him, but his brow cinched together in the middle, and there were little lines of worry around the frown of his lips. His body language seemed a bit off, sort of tense, which he always seemed to be, but mixed with the gloomy face, he was more on edge than usual. Decidedly, I would keep my guard up.
I glanced over to the window as a squirrel passed and crumpled my shirt in my fists. I couldn’t deal with this guy. He owed me no apology for actually caring about my safety and doing his job. And he brought coffee and greasy fast food.
More annoyed that he was getting to me, I snatched the iced latte from the drink tray and stuck my tongue through the hole in the dome to retrieve some whipped cream and caramel.
Though he didn’t owe me an apology for speaking the truth and bruising my ego a little bit, I said, “Accepted.” But I didn’t give an ounce of remorse for my actions. It wasn’t something I did. Apologies, nope. I was too prideful for that shit, and while I did nothing wrong last night, I could’ve at least told him that what he said was right, and he didn’t have to apologize for it, but I couldn’t.
I couldn’t let him know that I decided he was somewhat okay, and he was inching his way into my good graces—at a snail's pace. Not when I still had no idea why he was here, and he was so hard for me to figure out. One minute Coal hated my guts, then the other, he was possessive and helping me shoot pool.
Besides, I was still pissed with him and not in the mood to change my mind on that fact.
“So, what's on the agenda for today?” Acting casual, he dropped the bags of food on the counter and pushed through to the bathroom. I sipped my pumpkin spice iced latte. Yes, I know, basic, but I could appreciate something yummy as I listened to him wash his hands. He reappeared, looking just as yummy as my latte. I shifted, uncomfortable with my body’s visceral reaction to him.
“I don’t know. I was going to sit on the couch and do absolutely nothing. So, unless you have a better idea, I’m going to need you to find somewhere else to sit today. Perhaps the floor?” I snatched the bag off the counter, like the little asshole I was, and sprawled out on the couch. He huffed and popped a squat on the carpet in front of the coffee table. I tried my best to ignore how great he smelled and how much it was affecting me. What the hell was wrong with me?
Never had I let someone get to me this much. I rarely felt embarrassed or let my actions and being judged by someone bother me. Maybe it was because I had possibly met my match? Why would that turn me on?
“Well,” he started, then stopped as if he didn’t want to say what he was about to. “I’m here for a reason, so I think we should start training.” I pondered as I took a bite of chicken biscuit and chewed, staring at him.
“If training means you’ll be gone, then I guess we could do that.” Deflection, another superpower, I guess. He looked a bit hurt but quickly recovered his cal
m. I still couldn’t ignore the tense way his muscles moved, replacing the usual ease by which his body flowed—despite how big he was. “But I only hunt at night, it's easier to conceal, and honestly, people aren’t as risky during the day. So, I’m not sure how you want to proceed.”
“Well, all I need is to feed on shadows. Seeing you in your element last night, I’m sure I could feed from you without harming anyone else. I could get a feel for balancing your shadows by feeding now.” My heart did a little flip when it shouldn’t have. There was nothing intimate about a statue feeding, from what little I knew of them, but the thought of me feeding him had me somewhat turned on. Squash it.
He could kill me while feeding. Is that why he is so tense? I sat up suddenly, then worked to calm myself, eyeing him speculatively. I couldn’t let him know that I was on to him.
“So what, I just summon the shadows?” I peered at him but couldn’t see his face as his back was to me.
He nodded. “Or I can just touch you.”
I gulped, not liking the idea of just sitting back while he could potentially suck the life from me. A barrage of thoughts raced through my mind. Would he be powerful enough to kill me? Would I be able to stop him? Was he going to try to kill me, or were we training?
If he wasn’t trying to kill me, what would he see of my life? Would he feed from my shadows or of those that I took from others? From which I fed? Would he know the void that was my soul? The bleak way I viewed the world? The disgust for humans and, well, everyone around me? How would he view me once he saw my most inner thoughts?
Why did it matter? He wasn’t anyone to me.
My mind reeled with questions.
I struggled with the idea as I finished my biscuit. I didn’t want Coal to see into any part of my life. Not the way I saw into the lives of others.
I was the predator, not the prey.
He patiently waited, pulling out a biscuit for himself. Within two bites, it was gone. He grabbed another while he waited—king of awkward pauses. Let’s eat all the food in the room.
“I don’t know,” I murmured, sounding more vulnerable than I wanted to. Coal’s eyes bounced to me, then back to his biscuit.
“What, you’re afraid of what I’ll see?” he asked contentiously, suddenly all too comfortable with the situation. Was I misreading the earlier tense air?
I couldn’t ignore the taunt. No, I wasn’t afraid of anything.
“I’m hardly afraid of anything,” I said, determined. I wouldn’t fold.
“Then what is it?” You mean other than the fact that I don’t trust you and am freaking out that I could be dead in, I don’t know, two minutes?
Not answering, I stood and crumpled the wrapper to my breakfast, meeting his provocation head-on. I tossed the ball through the kitchen and into the trash can. Foot by foot, he rose to his feet. It was a debacle watching the man get up. There was no grace as Coal unfolded his limbs. He stood in front of me, calm, cool, and collected.
I’m glad one of us was. I clenched my fists, hoping he couldn’t see me trembling. I didn’t want to die. Not by his hands. I had lived for thousands of years without a problem. Now, I was about to be stripped of my dignity and quite possibly my life. If feeding for him was anything like when I fed, I was about to be stripped of any secret that I may keep.
I opted for space, and the room filled with my shadows as they reached for him. I inhaled deeply, preparing myself. I blocked everything out of my mind, putting up walls until it was only me in a white-walled room in my mind. Out of sight, out of mind, I hoped.
Coal’s skin took on a smoky charcoal color, his eyes white. The scars on his face and arms stayed light, leaving him looking like a possessed anti-tiger.
A shudder coursed through me as I felt his pull on my shadows. Wasting no time, he took long drugging pulls of me, drinking me in. My body warmed; my knees went weak. It was as if he was touching every cell of my body, caressing me inside and out. He was quickly everywhere within me, and I wasn’t sure I could hold my walls up much longer. The heat between my legs caught me off guard. His euphoric invasion spread all over my body. His touch was exquisite, delicious. Harsh yet delicately, he played my body like a fiddle, his bow strumming expertly, the crescendo building until I was nearly orgasmic. An inhuman melody slipped from my mouth in response to the sweet torture, and I realized I had lost all hold on what I was doing with my shadows.
Despite the pleasure I was feeling, I could feel my body weakening. Coal kept me so high, tantalizing me, that I almost didn’t care until I felt the stir in my mind as he pulled at the darkness within me. I barricaded my walls, keeping my mind blank. He took another pull and I gasped. It didn’t hurt, but it didn’t feel the best either, only because it left me feeling defenseless.
Fear of him killing me sparked. It was amazing that a being from another realm could do what a god in this realm couldn’t. That was the magic of different worlds. One all-powerful being in one realm wasn’t shit in another. He was only supposed to be learning my shadows to get a feel of what to balance when we were out in the field, but he was legit feeding. I could feel my energy zapping out.
His invasion stirred within me, letting me know he was still there. Only this time, he conjured darkness, and the feeling of ecstasy began to fade. I hoped my empty mind worked. I couldn’t let him see what his presence was doing to me, especially now that he affected my life. I couldn’t open myself up like that.
I felt shaky—a little weak.
My nervousness reached a peak within me. I was pretty sure we were past training, and Coal was truly feeding, enough to attempt to kill me. There was a good chance he was taking enough to end me.
“Stop,” I muttered, not liking where this was going. My vision was fading, and I couldn’t keep my strength up any longer.
I pulled myself from my mind’s eye, bringing myself back to the reality of the apartment around me.
Coal kept going, looking like a mad man. He was shaking, muscles rippling as he pulled my essence in. Sweat beaded on his forehead. I was pretty sure it wasn’t painful for him to feed, so what was happening? Was he fighting himself?
My stomach dropped, and panic raced in.
He was trying to kill me.
I didn’t misread the sorrow in his eyes, the restless energy. Hades had placed the order.
He had to kill me.
His eyes glitched, and he blinked rapidly, his lips pulling back in a vicious snarl. He took another drag like a chronic smoker calming his nerves. Panic gripped my chest as his invasion left me conflicted. It both turned me on and drained my energy.
I staggered forward, my breath coming in short bursts. I wasn’t in any pain, but the edges of my vision were fraying. I felt helpless in my skin, paralyzed. I didn’t know what to do. I had never been in such a position. Never had anything come close to damaging me.
But he was, and he was doing it quickly and swiftly. My guess was the change in his demeanor meant that he was hoping I would die while my brain was clouded with sexual feelings and floating in a squishy sea of euphoria. But that didn’t happen, and the darkness shrouded me, something he didn’t want to happen. He didn’t anticipate just how many shadows I had. Was my theory correct? Maybe he didn’t get it when I said I was literally a shadow. Or perhaps Daddy hadn’t told him?
My heart warmed despite what was happening. Coal wasn’t like me, not a killer, but a warrior. He believed in honorable deaths, even if it was mine. He may have had to kill me for whatever reason, but he still didn’t want me to feel pain when I couldn’t defend myself. He wanted an opponent that could fight back, make him earn his kill.
This kill was far from honorable and way out of his comfort zone. A war was waging behind those amber eyes.
My brain screamed for me to do something, to find some way to get him away from me, but I couldn’t concentrate long enough to do so. My body was exhausted. All I wanted to do was fall to the floor, curl into a ball, and sleep forever.
Ironically, my li
fe flashed before my eyes. What would happen to me when I died? I didn’t have a soul. No parents. I wasn’t born. There was nothing to nurture within me—no ounce of good. I certainly wasn’t going upstairs. Would anyone remember me for anything other than a good lay?
Or so I hoped.
No one loved me. There was no legacy for me to leave. I lived a life of solitary confinement, keeping myself shut off from everything and everyone. Survival mode always.
Would I go back to the Underside for Daddy to continue his torment as a worthless bit of magic that he could control?
I didn’t have a soul so could I even be tortured for eternity? Or would I just cease to exist?
Even worse, what would happen to poor, beautiful Zee without her mama here to wash her every Sunday?
Hatred pooled within my chest. How could my father do this? How could he deny me of love, of happiness, my entire life? To leave me with only the vile memories of the things he’d done that were way less than honorable. Send me topside so he didn’t have to deal with me, then order to kill me when I became too strong? He was a worthless coward and had someone doing his dirty work after letting me possibly get attached. What the hell did I do to deserve such a slimy weasel for a father?
A surge of power zapped my nerves, and I tugged on my shadows. It did nothing but drain me faster.
I dropped to one knee feeling woozy. The room was spinning around me. I tried once again to rip my shadows from Coal’s hold, but he was so entwined in my being that I couldn’t dispel all of him. No matter what I did, he had a grip on me somewhere. While I focused on removing him from one part, he latched back onto another. It was a vicious cycle that only ended with my death.
Eyes heavy, breathing scattered, I looked to him. His eyes were pleading with me. Sorrow and regret tossed about in the bright, burning embers of his eyes. He had no reason to regret what he was doing, taking a force of evil from the world. I was evil, plain and simple. I didn’t deserve to live. He was a source of good with no reason to keep me around. But still, I wanted to live. Lonely or not, I wasn’t ready to not exist. I was content with my life, no matter how much it sucked.
Pawns Daughters of The Underworld Book 1 Page 4
