“Coal,” I muttered, my voice sounding distant and raspy. I hoped to feed on the shame in his eyes and use it to my advantage, but my thoughts disappeared before I could form the words and keep the sentence straight enough to get it out. My strength gave out, and I fell forward, barely catching myself with my hands. I landed on one palm and an elbow. “Please,” my word came out on a wheeze as the air rushed from my lungs.
In an instant, it was all over. Coal freed me from his grip as he stumbled back. Power swelled within him. His eyes were stark white, his skin black with a gorgeous gold and silver marbling, like a granite countertop. Thick canines protruded from his bottom jaw, overlapping his top lip, and elf-like ears peeked out of his thick hair. Razor-sharp talons extended from each one of his fingers. A giant set of wings fluttered behind him, lifting and dropping with the rise and fall of his heaving breaths as he paced the short length of the room. He looked like Coal but colder. Darker.
Freaky yet beautiful … not of this earth.
I was all sorts of mixed up. I was freaked out, weak, and turned on. Never had I felt so intimate with someone as if Coal’s hands were everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Yet, the emptiness without him in my chest was indescribable. Dreadful.
I sat back, drawing myself from my mind and bringing the apartment back in view. Coal paced back and forth in the tiny space, snarling, a constant growl vibrating through him. I used the bar top to pull myself to my feet. I had to get it together, but my brain was swimming. I couldn’t let him see how out of sorts I was.
I yearned for his touch but loathed it all at the same time, to fuse myself with him and kill him, to love him and hate him.
Wait, hold up, I wouldn’t go as far as love, but you get the picture.
How could someone possibly make me feel this way? He took a step forward but caught himself mid-step as if he were still battling an invisible war. I refused to flinch. I met his glare with equal disdain, a challenge. Without his grip on me, I was able to keep myself steady. I lifted my head with a snarl of my own. Above all, I was livid that he had attempted it.
“What’s the matter, statue? Not strong enough to finish the job?” I wasn’t sure what happened, why he let go and didn’t finish me off, and taunting him in my condition probably wasn’t the smartest move, but I couldn’t help but poke the bear.
Plus, I had never seen a gargoyle before. Maybe I wanted to see how far I could push Coal to see what would happen if I did. He was magnificent. He exuded power and strength. The kind of menace that made the hair on your arms stand on end. A sight a human would turn away from, but not me. His body moved fluidly despite being made of stone, all sinew and muscles. He stalked me like a jaguar to a tapir.
“Come get me,” I solidified my death wish.
I had no reason to be taunting him. I was weak, on the verge of death, or so it felt like it because I could barely keep my head up. The only thing keeping me going was the adrenaline my human body supplied. I couldn’t do anything to harm him, even though I wanted to rip him to shreds. Yank every terrorizing fear from him and feed until I watched the life slip from his eyes. But not even my shadows were interested.
Still, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I guess I was ready to die since I couldn’t stop tempting the giant. “Come on, ogre,” I egged him on. His growl grew louder until it took on the edge of a roar. I backed myself into the countertop when he took a step forward.
My guess is he couldn’t finish the job. My power was too much, and that's why he had a bad case of ‘roid rage going on right now.
“Stop,” he bit between clenched teeth, but I wasn’t sure whether the command was for him or me.
He stopped directly in front of me. I stiffened my wobbly self and stared him straight in his creepy-ass eyes, lifting my chin to meet his threat. Thankfully I had moved on, at least momentarily, from being turned on by his seizure of my shadows.
“Do it, Coal. Come on, what are you waiting for?” His breath was hot like the pavement on a southern summer’s day. It whispered against my cheeks, making me backup a hair. He huffed, sizing me up in a slow back and forth movement, his head tilted ever so slightly. Excitement flared within me in anticipation for the possible fight that I would surely lose, no doubt about that. But either way, seeing him in his full glory had me itching for a scrimmage.
His eyes went all storm clouds, then slowly his irises formed. A pale amber color drifted in to surround black pupils. He transformed back to the Coal I knew, and his head hung as he stared down at me.
I still didn’t know where we stood. Would Coal try to kill me again?
I let myself relax just a bit, but I would keep my guard up. “What the hell was that all about, you raging fucking psycho?” I didn’t stand a chance in my current condition, but I could at least try to fight him off and make a run for the door if he tried anything.
“Shut up,” he inhaled slowly.
“What’s the matter? Are you a coward, or just not powerful enough to finish the job?” Palms flat, I gave him a good shove to the chest. It did nothing. Like a fly to a leaf, he barely felt it. He planted an arm on either side of my body, leaning his full weight on the groaning bar top. I removed myself from leaning against it, afraid it might give way with both of us on it. It pushed us closer together, and despite seeing red, a fire ignited in my belly. The situation was so effed. “Well? I’m waiting.”
“Will you give me a minute?”
“Uh, no, asshole, you just tried to kill me. I don’t owe you a goddamn thing, and I’d appreciate it if you would let me out of this little cage.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” I jerked my head back in surprise, not expecting him to back down so easily. The movement caused my brain to jiggle, and the room spun like a carousel. I was just along for the ride. Stepping back, he carefully removed his arms and rose to his full height.
Stupidly, I tried to take a step. My heart was pounding so hard I felt lightheaded and unable to catch my breath. My chest felt as if someone filled my lungs with sand. Standing there was too much for my human body to handle without my shadows to accompany it. I glanced down at the floor, trying to plan my next step, but gravity said no, and I went tumbling forward.
Coal was quick to aid me. He grabbed me beneath my arms like a mother would pick up a child. I knew he was just trying to help, but it pissed me off. I didn’t need his help. I may have been weak, but I was okay. How many times did I have to tell him that?
“Get off of me,” I rasped and tried to push off of him, but my arms were like boiled noodles. Useless.
“Cut it out, just let me help you,” he snapped.
“Fuck you. I’m fine. I just need to sit down.” His eyes flashed with anger and something like regret, maybe shame. Good. He should feel like a dick for what he did.
I swayed where I stood, even with his help. I wiggled out of his grip and straightened my t-shirt.
“You need to do more than sit down. You need to feed.”
“Yeah, and who the hell is to blame for that, Buck-o?” I sent him daggers with my eyes and carefully took a calculated step to the side with the aid of the countertop. I dared him to touch me.
He had no right to tell me what I needed after what he just did. He held his arms up in resignation.
“What do I need? I need an explanation other than the obvious. You tried to kill me. I guess the apology and biscuits were less for last night and more for what you were about to do.” I put all the force I possibly could into my words. One, to hide the fact that I couldn’t breathe, and two, to let him know just how mad I was. All the while, I hoped my bra was hiding just how hard his proximity had made my nipples.
He stared distantly, shame crowding his face so that his features were all jumbled together.
I crawled to the couch, determined to make it there on my own and too stubborn to accept his help. But why would I? He was the reason for the foreign sensations I was feeling.
Nothing—I mean nothing—had ever gotten the up
per hand on me. The fact that Coal had was embarrassing as hell.
We didn’t prey on other creatures when topside, just to keep the peace, and humans were just worthless. By the time I found them, they never had a second to see me coming.
I was untouchable and had lived my life in such a manner, until now.
Finally reaching the couch, after like five minutes of crawling and silently whimpering, I dragged myself up on the navy cushions. After positioning myself to see Coal, I noticed that his back was still to me.
My sense of threat dropped just a little, and I was thankful that he didn’t witness the disaster that was me slithering my way across the living room. The five steps felt like ten miles with my rubber body.
All instincts to protect myself went out the window when my head hit the arm of the couch. My head against the soft cushion was pure bliss as my body relaxed and sleep toyed with the edges of my consciousness. With all my might, I lifted my head. Something told me that he wouldn’t try anything else, not like I could do anything about it, but I wasn’t about to zonk out and let him have his way with me.
Coal let out a long, exaggerated breath and raked his hands through his sweat-coated hair. He massaged the back of his neck with his thumbs, then slowly turned. When his eyes met mine, my heart lurched. The regret and the agony were gut-wrenching.
I almost forgave him right then and there, though he didn’t deserve it. Not in a million years did he deserve my forgiveness. But those eyes, there was no denying what they were telling me.
“I’m sorry,” he started. I bit back the string of curses that was ready to explode from my very colorful vocabulary and stared up at the ceiling, unable to take the weight of his gaze any longer. Sleep tugged, daring me to give in, but I forced my eyes open, deciding it was probably better that I face him rather than rest. He dropped to a squat, placing his forearms against his knees and lacing his fingers together.
He sighed again. “Perhaps it would be easier to show you.”
“You’re not touching me ever again, buddy. You lost that opportunity.” I shook my head and winced. Little trolls that held the strings to my brain had lost their hold, and it was bouncing in my skull. I groaned and closed one eye—the other kept lookout.
“I’m not going to hurt you. I think we will be better off as partners.”
“And what makes you think you’re in a position to make such a proposition?”
“We have a common enemy.”
“I think the common enemy is you, especially now.”
“I saw everything, Shay,” he said, voice strained. My mouth dried, and my breath stopped dead in my sandy lungs. I glanced over at him. Everything, everything? His head hung, and he stared at the floor. “You loathe your father as much as I do.”
“You work for him. That hardly shows that you loathe him.” Venom made my voice thick, and I hoped he understood just how mad I was.
“I don’t work for him. I’m his servant,” he admitted.
My head snapped up. My heart lurched into my throat as the room whirled around. Not a smart idea.
“I had a feeling you were here to kill me, but that I wasn’t expecting. Did you come here with an order to kill me?”
He shook his head. “Not exactly. My orders were to keep you in check. I had the intention of killing you myself, just to get back at him, but then I saw you.” He paused, pain flashing in his eyes. “He confirmed the order for the hit last night after the bar.” His words sent a chill through me.
My instincts were right. Coal was here to kill me for multiple reasons. But what I hadn’t anticipated was the slightly less honorable mention of the fact that he wanted to kill me for revenge?
Man, my life just couldn’t get any better than this.
“Wait, back up. I know I’m hot, but that’s hardly a reason to not kill me, and I know it’s not my charming personality, though I find myself to be quite the good time, that kept you from attempting your original plan,” I breathed, still feeling winded. Longer sentences were much more challenging and took a ton out of me.
I wanted to scold him, but I didn’t have the energy. A reminder that I wasn’t feeling well if I wasn’t in the mood to argue and share my wit with the world. Just a testament to how out of sorts I was.
All I wanted to do was give in to the glorious weight that was pulling my body beneath the surface of awareness.
He laughed, but the sentiment didn’t reach his hollow eyes.
“So, what is it? Why couldn’t you kill me?” I urged.
“It was hard enough killing her once. I couldn’t do it again.” Okay, cryptic.
Hardly in the mood for riddles, I snapped. “Just spit it out already.”
“Onyx, my mate.”
6
I pushed myself up on my elbows and tilted my head ever so slightly to the side. “I’m sorry, it sounded like you just said you couldn’t kill your mate a second time?”
It may have been my foggy brain or his riddles, but I was having a hard time grasping the concept that you could kill someone twice or the simple fact that pure and righteous Coal had killed his mate once.
“That’s because that's what I said. Will you please just let me show you? So that way you know I’m telling you the truth about everything. It is the least I could do after trying to kill you.”
“There is a lot I could find for you to do to make up for attempting to kill me.” I tried not to be concerned that my anger with him was dwindling. He had an annoying way of taking it from me.
“And I will do all of those things.” My heart fluttered at the promise in his tone and the thought of just precisely what he had in mind. No, he tried to murder me. “Whatever I can do to earn your trust. I owe you that. But please, let me show you.” I couldn’t help the permanent scowl on my face.
I shivered. I wanted Coal nowhere near me after the attack. Was I dramatic? Sure, but he did just try to kill me, and nothing rocked me to my core more. I owed him nothing more than throwing him out on his ass or killing him in return for making me feel like utter dog shit. But his words stuck with me.
There was too much I needed to know.
Before Coal, I was a typical child who felt she didn’t get enough attention from her father. Well, that and I despised him for many other things he had done that weren’t fatherly and more cringe-worthy than anything.
But now, my father had made the biggest mistake of his life by trying to have me killed and failing at it.
Coal would be a great asset to taking him out, but I didn’t trust him as far as I could throw him. And given his abominable snowman status, throwing him even with my superhuman abilities was impossible. So no, I didn’t trust him one bit.
I considered my options. I needed an ally, and Coal was as good as any. Not like I had any other options, as Miss Underside wasn’t a title I carried. I knew that I enjoyed picking on him. He was smart and easy on the eyes, and I had somewhat enjoyed his company, even if he annoyed me more than he didn’t. His size was ridiculous, but I countered that by relentlessly teasing him, so that wasn’t too bad either.
Plus, he smelled good. And he cleaned the apartment. But he also ate a lot, despite saying he didn’t need food. So, there was that.
Hardly a reason not to take him up on his offer.
He did apologize and promised to make it up to me. A promise I would not take lightly.
But could I trust him? Was he my father’s servant? My father didn’t usually have servants. But then again, I hadn’t seen my father in nearly a thousand years. So he could be up to anything at this point.
My eyes bounced over Coal. As if sensing my eyes on him, his gaze connected with my own. I studied him, taking him in.
I couldn’t believe I was considering forgiving him, trying to trust him. I needed answers, and he could help.
I rolled my eyes, not wanting to give in to anything, but the need to kill my father was high on my list now, and Coal might be a means to an end.
I had to let him show m
e. As much as I didn’t want him near me or touching me, he couldn’t hide anything if he showed me. His memories would be undeniable proof.
What would I see of his past? What would be his fears? Would I even be able to control myself? I mean, sure, I could quit whenever I wanted when I’d fed from humans. Killing the innocents was just pure sport. But gargoyles were dark creatures, and Coal didn’t have a mate to balance the darkness he consumed. He shouldered the burden all on his own.
I could only imagine the things he’d done and seen, the delicious sadness that flowed through him. Would I be able to stop once I started?
I shivered with the thought. As much as I loved torturing creeps and driving their worst fears from them, doing it to Coal didn’t sit well with me, even if he tried to kill me. He wasn’t my favorite person in the world, and our relationship was more of the hate-hate type if even a relationship at all. But I didn’t want anything to happen to him at this point either. I was selfish and a bit sadistic. I had some fun times and laughed with him.
If he could be an asset to taking out my father, I needed to keep him around, at least until we saw the job through.
“Are you scared, Shay?” Despite his shame, a sparkle glinted in his eye.
My heart flipped happily. I chalked it up to having Coal all over me, not the fact that I liked him.
But I had to admit, it was proving hard to stay mad at him with all the remorse in his eyes.
“Scared? Naw, I just don’t want to kill you,” I said as we fell into our usual banter. It was easy to forget what just happened.
He raised a surprised brow. “Are you trying to say you like me?”
“No, I sure as hell wouldn’t go that far.” His eyes dropped to the floor. “I’ve just never fed from anything other than a human before. You have thousands of years of darkness in you. You feed off of it as I do. What if I can’t stop?”
Pawns Daughters of The Underworld Book 1 Page 5
