Rage

by Michelle Pace

  “Please,” she begged. It was Scot’s turn to shoot her a sly

  smile. His hands dug into the flesh of her thighs as he pulled her harder to him. He continued moving, slowly at first, but after

  much more begging from Cheyenne, he quickened his pace and

  thrust deeply into her.

  Her responses to him were feverish, as she bucked wildly

  against him. As he took her nipple between his teeth, she thrust harder, with desperate moans. He felt her explode around him,

  her nails ripping across his shoulder blades in an instinctual ani-125

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  malistic fervor. Unable to suppress his climax any longer, he let go and blissfully surrendered.

  Hesitating to break the connection between them, he reluc-

  tantly pulled out and collapsed beside her. For several minutes

  they both struggled to steady their breathing. Scot rolled onto his side and ran his fingers down between her breasts. She turned to him, her eyes still dilated and heavy. He kissed her and gave her lower lip a nip.

  “Let me know when you are ready for another go,” He

  cocked his eyebrow at her.

  “How about right now?” Cheyenne murmured, her wet

  kisses traveling up his inner thigh.

  Phillip had his head in his hands, his elbows on his knees.

  His head felt like it would explode from the questions that

  surged in it. His heart hammered as he tried to find his voice.

  Images, memories, and what-ifs swirled like a cyclone inside

  him. He felt Cedric sit beside him on the bottom step, and the

  momentary sensation of another human being in close proximity

  steadied him enough to stammer out a bit of communication.

  “I just don’t understand. Why didn’t she tell me?” He

  turned his dizzy gaze on Cedric.

  Cedric simply shook his head. He still seemed stunned by

  Phillip’s ignorance. “I have no idea. I’m so sorry. Dad and I left it for her to tell you. I suppose that was pretty idiotic of us.”

  Phillip’s eyes narrowed. “Why the hell…wasn’t it mine?”

  Cedric turned blazing eyes at him. “Of course it was yours.”

  Phillip heaved a soul-wrenching sigh. “I don’t understand

  how things went so terribly wrong.”

  Cedric looked out at the dark ocean. “Phillip, Stephanie has

  been monumentally broken since our mother died. When the go-

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  ing gets tough, she retreats. She doesn’t deal with issues, at least she didn’t until recently.”

  “She’s never talked about your mum.” Phillip frowned as

  the weight of his own statement sunk in. This was an unexpected

  turn in the conversation, and he turned completely in Cedric’s

  direction, starving for any insight into his former lover.

  “They weren’t speaking at the time of our accident. Mom

  and Dad were separating after twenty-five years of marriage, and Steph blamed my mom. Their break-up convinced Steph that no

  one could ever stay together. Marriage became a trivial joke to

  her after that. I’ve been all over the world and heard the confessions of thousands of people. My sister is still the single most jaded person I’ve ever encountered.”

  Phillip tried to imagine Steph as a willful shrew of a teenage

  girl and realized it wasn’t hard. It sounded like she’d stopped

  aging emotionally after her mum’s death and had never pro-

  gressed since.

  “When we had the accident, I think it ruined Stephanie. The

  last time they’d talked, Steph screamed at Mom. She told her she hated her and hung up on her. Steph was always willful and

  bullheaded, but after the accident…” Cedric paused, as if choked up by the intense memory. “She refused to view mom’s body.

  My father was far too distraught to make time to deal with Steph, so she sort of…imploded. And this happened completely unnoticed, with no guardian to step in and console her or counsel her.

  She wouldn’t come to the visitation at the funeral home, and as

  far as I know she never saw my mom’s body…she never had that

  closure. I had to physically drag her to the gravesite. I’ll never forget her demeanor. Stoic is the best word I can use to describe her. It gives me chills thinking about it, even now. She just shut off all emotion like flipping a switch.”

  “That’s a big burden for anyone to have to carry. Especially

  a child.” Phillip conceded. He cringed at the thought that he’d

  been so clueless about Steph’s formative years. So unaware of

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  such large aspects of her past that he could make such blunders

  at every turn. “No offense, Cedric, but why am I just now hear-

  ing all of this shite from you?”

  “I don’t know. Why didn’t you get to know her before you

  proposed? You know, before putting her on the spot in front of

  both families so that she could feel like she was going to disappoint everyone if she said no. “

  “I was madly in love with her. I wanted to shout it from the

  top of a bloody mountain. I thought it was the right thing to do,”

  he snapped.

  “It was a very ‘rock star’ thing to do.” Cedric cocked a terse

  eyebrow, pausing for emphasis. “It was a very Kevin-like thing

  to do.”

  It was as if Cedric had pulled out a gun and shot him in the

  heart. Stephanie’s ex-boyfriend was an unbelievably successful

  movie star and had lavishly proposed to her right after causing a huge scandal. He’d openly cheated on her while filming a movie

  south of the border, and the story had been all the rage for the tabloids when Phillip first met Steph.

  He tried to argue with Cedric…tried to grasp for a straw of

  a comeback and had none. He’d royally fucked up. He cringed as

  he recalled his choices since the proposal, as they played before his eyes like the world’s most embarrassing montage. The “Fire

  Woman” video was a pretty big slap in the face. Especially now

  that he knew she hadn’t been with Clive. And, he thought, at

  least Kevin had the decency to propose in private. Steph had de-

  served much more consideration from Phillip. He hadn’t thought

  enough about her feelings when making plans for their future.

  He stood.

  “I have to go talk to her.”

  On his way up the stairs he heard Cedric mumble, sounding

  very much like Steph. “That’s long overdue. But you might want

  to wait till she sobers up!”

  He rounded up a driver and muttered some lame excuse to

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  Bret. All the way back to the pousada, he rehearsed what he’d

  say to her. What he’d ask. He bribed the overnight clerk to give him her room number, and as he took the stairs two at a time, he started to consider her replies. He had his hand up to knock when he decided he’d better listen to Cedric this time. He wanted them both to be sober for this. His hand fell to his side, and he turned and walked away.

  129

  CHAPTER TEN

  Steph woke to a tiny hand pinching her nose.

  When she peeled her dry eyelids open, Liam’s curlicue grin

  greeted her. “Beep, Tee tee!”

  “Morning, Liam Sebastian.”

  “Hungee,” he replied, jumping up and down on the bed.

  Steph was amazed at her lack of a hangover. Ah, beer. Her drink

  of choice paid off, yet again.

  “Are you hungry?” She
saw it was nearly ten o’ clock.

  She threw a white sundress over her head and applied a

  thick layer of sunblock. After gooping Liam up with tons more

  than she’d allowed for herself, she decided she could not take

  one more day of her ankles being gnawed on by borrachudo

  mosquitos. She sprayed on so much insect repellent she thought

  she might asphyxiate them both. As a final barrier she tossed on her custom-made red cowboy boots. She remembered how Phillip had once called them ‘a legendry aphrodisiac,’ playing into

  his boyhood fantasies about being a cowboy in Texas. She al-

  most yanked them off and tossed them over the balcony, but they

  were her favorites and she couldn’t bear to part with them. She

  carried Liam down to the dining area and was mildly surprised to see Nathan and Saffron sitting alone sipping mimosas and dining

  on Eggs Benedict.

  “Morning, Stephanie.” Saffron greeted her cheerfully, as if

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  have seemed as odd, had she not been wearing a black dress that

  looked like it was made of latex. Steph nodded to the odd couple and sat Liam in the seat across from Nathan. Saffron sashayed to the bar for a refill, and Stephanie watched the giddy expression Nathan tried to mask as followed her cat-like movements in a

  predatory manner.

  “Oh, my God, Nathan! You’re in love with her, aren’t

  you?” Stephanie gasped in a hushed tone as she slapped him

  across the arm. Nathan glanced at her and back at Saffron with

  an unrepentant grin.

  “Alright. So sue me.” Nathan conceded, his green eyes

  dancing as he flipped his overly long bangs out of the way.

  “She’s a dominatrix, Nate. Not to mention a professional

  groupie. I know for a fact that she’s been following different

  bands for half a decade. What the f—” Steph started, but Nathan

  simply silenced her with one hand, his expression serene and

  uncompromising.

  “Don’t.” It was more of a request than a demand. Stephanie

  paused, took a drink of her orange juice, and nodded.

  “Okay.” Who the hell was she to judge what worked for

  them? Hadn’t her first major relationship been a twisted anti-

  romance with a kinky wannabe dominant? Though she hadn’t

  seen him since college, Pace had been her go-to guy after Kevin

  left her, and she’d even tried to use him as a rebound after she saw the “Fire Woman” video, but that hadn’t worked out so well.

  Pace Turner had been in law school when they met. Stepha-

  nie was a junior in college at the time and bored to tears; she’d been sewing her wild oats. Pace’s cocky brilliance had drawn her to him immediately—not to mention his ridiculous good looks.

  He’d been old for his class, having dropped out of med school

  before they met. Even his money was old, as old as one’s could

  get when that person was African-American. Pace had as much

  of an ego as Steph did, so their arrangement worked well for months. Like all good natural disasters, they’d burned out their 131

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  relationship before it took on too much real steam, but they still exchanged dirty holiday cards and the occasional email until she started dating Phillip.

  A couple of weeks after she saw the “Fire Woman” video

  for the first time and told Cheyenne about the baby, Steph ended up on a shoot in New York. Pace lived in Boston, which was

  only a few hours away, and she figured his charms would do her

  a world of good. So she called.

  “Hey, Red.” His deep Barry White voice sounded as if he

  were in the next room. “I heard you broke up with your rock

  star.”

  “Ya don’t say?” Steph had been ambushed in Heathrow the

  week before by reporters from The Star. When asked “How does it feel to see the “Fire Woman” video?”, she ignored them. When

  she heard the follow-up question. “How does it feel to see Phillip act out your sex life with Joslyn James?”, Steph stopped and

  glared into the video camera.

  “Well that was obviously play-acting since she seemed to

  be enjoying herself!” she’d shouted, and it now seemed to be the sound bite of the year.

  Pace’s laughter ripped her back from her revived anger. “I

  was wondering if I should expect a visit.”

  “You sound tired, Pace. Solicitor life got you down?”

  “I’m prepping for the court case. You remember—the one I went to law school for?”

  “Shit, Pace. That’s fabulous news.” He’d finally had the

  opportunity to take down his “big white whale” so to speak, and

  she was pestering him for a booty call. She felt small and insignificant in his world for the first time ever.

  “So when do I get to see you?” he asked, his tone as eager

  and aggressive as ever. This was one man who saw sex as the

  ultimate stress reliever, not some sort of a chore.

  “I’m at my apartment at The Dakota, ” she replied huskily.

  If anyone could help her forget about Phillip for a while, it’d be 132

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  Pace.

  As it turned out, he couldn’t. She and Pace had always had

  a sexual chemistry worthy of an epic poem. What transpired up-

  on his arrival in New York was anything but. They’d started

  their usual rough and dirty foreplay and to Steph, it felt awkward and forced. They had even managed to get into her bedroom and

  into the act, when while changing positions, he noticed her scar.

  “Where did this come from? Did you get in a knife fight or

  something?” he teased, and she surprised herself by bursting into tears. Embarrassed, she willed herself to stop, but the more she tried, the more hysterically she sobbed.

  Pace looked both concerned and alarmed as he rolled off of

  her and ran out of the room completely nude. Steph would have

  laughed at that, had she been able to regain control of herself. He returned with a box of tissues and two bottles of beer. It was the most romantic thing he’d ever done for her in the entire history of….them.

  Minutes later, she choked out a sentence. “Why did you

  stop?”

  Pace propped himself up on one massive tattooed arm and

  ran his thumb across her cheek. “Nothing sends ‘the Bishop’

  back to The Heartbreak Hotel faster than a crying woman.”

  She laughed at that, but the sound was jarring and disingen-

  uous. Even though she kind of wanted to hire a sniper to take

  him out, she would have done anything to have Phillip there in

  her bed with her instead of Pace. She not only missed sex with

  him, but she missed everything about him. Everything about

  them.

  She covered her mouth as the truth landed on her like an

  anvil. When she finally looked at Pace, he was studying her

  thoughtfully.

  “You love him.” It wasn’t a question, not in the least. She

  responded with stoic silence.

  For several moments, he seemed to puzzle over what to do

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  with her lack of denial. Finally, his expression hardened, and he rolled off the bed I one swift motion. When he started dressing, she didn’t bother to object.

  “This is the last time, Red. Don’t call me again.”

  The blinding sun came out from behind a cloud, and Steph

 
slid her sunglasses from on top of her head down over her eyes.

  She’d been very leery after the mishap with Pace, so agreeing to see Christopher had taken some serious thought. Steph tried to

  put all men out of her mind as she leaned back in her seat and

  picked up her coffee cup. It was impossible. Through the pano-

  ramic windows, she observed the blue sky was peppered with

  billowy, cotton-like clouds. Yara’s parents were swimming laps.

  Another breathtaking morning in paradise, and Steph still felt

  like she was looking at in a coffee table book, or watching it on t.v. She could almost hear Christopher’s amateur analysis that

  she was disconnected from the experience, like she was holding

  the entire island at arm’s length. She really needed to call Chris.

  He’d been nothing but good to her, and she owed him an expla-

  nation. As soon as she scraped one together, she’d be sure to

  provide it to him.

  Saffron sat down at the table offering Steph a mimosa, but

  she shook her head in response. She decided she was going to

  remain alcohol-free until the wedding reception. Tomorrow

  morning she would do some sunrise yoga on the beach and may-

  be get a massage before the wedding party monopolized the spa.

  She needed a healthy way of coping with Phillip and everything

  his presence in her life brought along with him. It was time to

  grab hold of the reigns.

  As Yara’s parents entered the building from the poolside

  patio, a breeze rolled in from the sea. It was an example of an-

  other perfect Noronha day. The forecast was rain-free, unlike the next two days, which were a bit iffy. She wished the wedding

  were today, for Yara’s sake. She wanted to spend the rest of the trip focusing on relaxation and taking care of her hosts, David

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  and Yara.

  Today, their fretful hostess planned an excursion to the vil-

  lage center and the historic forts for some sight-seeing and shopping. Then tonight was the luau at Praia da Conceição. It was a

  celebration of the full moon on Noronha. Supposedly the moon

  was so bright you could see the rocks in the water, and there

  would be a huge bonfire dance party that lasted until dawn. After ditching out on the second half of the boat excursion, Steph had vowed a blood oath to Cedric and Cheyenne that she would follow Yara’s wedding itinerary from here on out.