A Matter of Choice

by Laura Landon

  “Then I will be as direct as possible. I am here because of the terms of your marriage contract, my lady. Lord Montfort realizes you see the…events that happened as a breach of the promises he made, and intends to see that each stipulation he agreed to before your marriage is met.”

  It was too soon. She didn’t want to face this now. Every demand she’d insisted be a part of their marriage contract flashed before her. The paper she’d forced him to sign as well as the vow he’d given her on their wedding day—that if she ever found him unfaithful he would lose it all. A desperate voice screamed in denial. She didn’t want it to come to this.

  She lifted her head, jutting out her chin in a show of defiance. “I don’t want to discuss this, Mr. Graham. I have not asked my husband to meet the terms of our contract.”

  “That may be, Lady Montfort. But your husband was quite insistent it be handled today.”

  Her eyes focused intently on Mr. Graham, trying to interpret his thoughts. He skillfully kept his emotions well concealed.

  “This,” he said, handing her a paper, “is the deed to your husband’s London townhouse. Along with the keys. As you can see, it is deeded in your name.”

  She stared at the paper as if it was a snake that could bite her. Then she looked at the keys as if they would burn her when she touched them.

  “Please, take them, Lady Montfort. They are yours.”

  She stared at them, wishing them to disappear. Knowing what Joshua was telling her by giving them to her.

  Her chest hurt as if he’d plunged a knife into it, but she was left with no choice. With trembling fingers she reached for the paper and the keys, then placed them in her lap.

  “And this,” he said, handing her a thicker packet of papers, “is a complete listing of all Lord Montfort’s financial assets and accounts. There is an itemized, detailed listing of how every pound of your dowry was spent and the amount still remaining. The balance of your dowry will now, of course, revert back to you, as was stipulated in the original contract, along with other accounts held in the marquess’s name. You now have complete control of all the marquess’s money.”

  She hesitated, then numbly reached for the papers Mr. Graham held out to her. This was the bargain they’d struck, the terms she’d insisted upon. This was what she’d agreed she’d get, and he’d agreed to give up. And she knew taking them would change the rest of her life. Would make their separation more irreversible.

  “These,” he said, lifting a third set of papers, “are the deeds to all other Ashbury properties and estates not entailed. Lord Montfort freed them from debt with the money from your dowry and therefore considers them rightfully yours. The only assets not covered by your agreement are the entailed Ashbury holdings. Those will, when the present Duke of Ashbury dies, pass on to the Ashbury heir.”

  She was past feeling. She numbly placed these papers on her lap along with the rest. This was Joshua’s legacy. This was what he’d sacrificed his freedom to save. What he’d married her to gain. What he’d battled his father to protect. Her heart ached with a pain she didn’t know how to ease.

  “And this...” He held out a single piece of yellowed parchment paper. “...is the deed to Graystone Manor. It is now yours.”

  Her heart shattered inside her. He’d given her Graystone Manor. He’d given up the home that meant more to him than everything he would have gained as the next Duke of Ashbury. The only place he’d ever been happy. The place where his mother rested in her grave.

  She looked at the growing pile of papers on her lap. At the mounting wealth she’d acquired, and felt physically ill.

  “There is one more item to cover, Lady Montfort. This is not a part of the marriage contract but is a special request made by the Marquess of Montfort. First, he agrees in writing that he will not contest your filing for divorce and will agree to whatever reasons you choose to give the courts. He does ask, however, that you wait to proceed with the divorce until you are certain you are not carrying a child.”

  She couldn’t stop the gasp that sucked the air from her. A babe. Joshua’s babe. Her hand trembled when she moved it to her stomach. What would she do if she were pregnant with his child?

  “If you do find yourself with child, Lord Montfort asks that you wait until the babe is born before you proceed with the divorce. To eliminate any question that the child is Lord Montfort’s rightful heir, as well as the future Duke of Ashbury.”

  She couldn’t listen to any more. On legs she prayed would support her, she stood. The papers fluttered to the floor. She left them lay. “I’m quite tired now and would like to retire.”

  “One more detail, Lady Montfort,” Mr. Graham said before she’d reached the door. “Lord Montfort said to remind you that he signed his name to the contract knowing full well the ramifications. He realizes therefore, that there is no choice for either of you.”

  She remained motionless, trying to stop the panic building inside her from suffocating her. She only had to hold out until she could be alone. “Thank you, Mr. Graham.” She took another step toward the door.

  “I’m sorry, my lady, but there was nothing I could do once Lord Montfort demanded the terms of the marriage contract be met.”

  Another surge of pain attacked her. With a nod she made her way to the door. She stopped when she reached the other side of the room and turned.

  Her gaze focused on the papers scattered on the floor. Papers that mattered more to Joshua than anything. Estates she’d never seen, money left from a dowry that was more a curse than a blessing, the townhouse where they’d made love the first time.

  She stared at the keys the solicitor had given her. “Do you know where he’s staying?”

  “I’m sorry, my lady. Lord Montfort did not disclose his place of residency.”

  “What income does he have to live on?”

  “I’m not aware of that either, my lady. All I know is that he signed everything over to you. As for any other source of income, I’m not aware that he has one.”

  She swallowed the lump lodged in her throat and walked out of the room, leaving behind the pile of papers that was the sum and substance of her life. Deeds to homes and estates that were to replace her husband. An astronomical wealth that was to be her substitute for a love she wasn’t sure she could live without.

  He’d given her everything. Even Graystone Manor. There was nothing more she could take from him.

  +++

  A week had gone by since Mr. Graham had been to visit her. Or perhaps it had been a month. She wasn’t sure. There were no days, or nights, or morning, or evenings. Only never-ending hours filled with pain and longing. And an emptiness that stole from her a will to live.

  That was why she was here. She couldn’t go on like this any longer. She had to find him.

  She stepped out of the carriage in front of the Marquess of Chardwell’s townhouse and stared at the imposing front entrance. She wasn’t exactly sure why she’d come here. Other than perhaps he knew where Joshua stayed. Could tell her if he was all right.

  She’d already been to Joshua’s townhouse, the house she’d taken from him by default. She’d pounded on the door, doing nothing but rousing Converse from his bed in the early, predawn hours.

  Joshua wasn’t there, but then she knew he wouldn’t be. He’d made an exit from her life. The keys his solicitor had given her were proof.

  “What if I told you that Lady Paxton drugged me to make it appear that we’d had an affair?”

  His words echoed in her mind. Night after night she’d paced the floor, sifting through what was true and what was a lie. What if he’d told her the truth? What if nothing had happened between them? What if that ugly scene had been a terrible ruse to make it look like they were having an affair? To discredit him? Ruin him? Take everything away from him?

  What if it hadn’t been?

  What if what she saw had actually happened? What if he was having an affair and she’d walked in on them? What if he didn’t care for her enough
to give their marriage even two months before he took a lover?

  A fresh wave of hurt and anger raged within her. Hadn’t she already seen the two of them locked in a lover’s embrace with their arms twined around each other and Lady Paxton’s lips reaching for his? Hadn’t her sisters reminded her over and over not to believe their lies? That they’d promise you anything—until they got your money?

  Trust me. Please.

  She brushed her hand over her face and nearly turned back to her waiting carriage. There was no mistaking what she’d seen. Joshua and Lady Paxton lying nearly naked on the settee.

  But perhaps, just perhaps, it wasn’t what it had seemed. If there was any chance he was telling the truth she had to find it. She didn’t want to spend the rest of her life without him if he hadn’t lied to her.

  “You aren’t going to give our marriage a chance, are you?”

  At that moment, she knew she couldn’t stop until she’d made every effort to discover the truth.

  She walked up the steps and pounded on Chardwell’s door until a very grumpy, very surprised, butler opened the door. It was still far too early for any respectable member of the ton to receive visitors.

  “I need to speak with the Marquess of Chardwell.” She didn’t give the man a choice as to whether or not he intended to let her enter but stepped through the doorway. She stopped in the center of the foyer.

  “Lord Chardwell is not receiving yet,” the butler answered in his most haughty demeanor.

  “I’ll wait.”

  His eyes narrowed. “Very well. Who shall I say is calling?”

  “The Marchioness of Montfort.”

  His jaw dropped slightly, then he nodded his head. “If you’ll follow me.”

  He led her to a small masculine study that had obviously never seen a feminine hand, and offered her a seat in one of the dark leather chairs flanking the cold fireplace.

  “I’ll send in tea,” he said, his tone a little warmer than before. “Lord Chardwell will be down momentarily.”

  “Thank you.” She leaned back against the chair and hugged herself. She was so very, very tired; so very worried and confused. How would she know what to believe?

  The tea arrived along with a footman to light a fire in the fireplace. She welcomed its warmth.

  Not long after, the door opened and Joshua’s friend stepped into the room.

  He’d obviously dressed in a hurry. His sandy blond hair was still slightly mussed, his handsome face still etched in sleep. There was also a faint shadow of stubble on his face that told her he had not taken time to shave. She remembered the feel of Joshua’s face when he first woke up. The raspy feel of him against her naked flesh when they made love in the early pre-dawn hours.

  Her heart suffered with a lurch.

  “Lady Montfort, I wasn’t expecting guests so early. Especially you.”

  She noticed a sharp edge in his tone but she didn’t have the time or the patience to let it deter her. “Is Joshua here?”

  “Are you searching for him?”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m surprised.”

  She lifted her chin and leveled a defiant look in his direction. “Have you seen him?”

  He stared at her for a moment, then turned away and walked past her. When he reached the glowing fireplace he turned to face her. “Not since yesterday.”

  “Do you know where he’s staying?”

  “You care?”

  She lifted her shoulders and glared at him. “Of course I care. He’s my husband.”

  “I seem to recall Montfort saying you no longer wished for him to remain your husband.”

  She took a deep breath, a painful breath that quivered when she released it. “I’d like to find him, Lord Chardwell. It’s important.”

  He studied her a long time then shook his head. “I’ll not let you hurt him again, Lady Montfort. I’m not sure he can survive more.”

  “You think he’s the only one who’s been hurt?”

  His dark eyes narrowed in anger. “No, you have both been hurt.”

  She stopped short. A multitude of doubts raced through her mind.

  “Did he tell you he’d been drugged?”

  “Yes.”

  “But of course you didn’t believe him.”

  “Why would anyone do such a thing?”

  “Montfort thinks his father was behind what happened.”

  She shook her head, unable to believe any father could hate his son enough to cause such a scandal. Hate him enough to want to ruin him and take everything away that should be his.

  But then she remembered the vile scene when Joshua’s father had come to see them shortly after they’d returned to London.

  Chardwell walked to the long, velvet-covered window and pulled back one panel of the heavy drapery. For a long time he stood with his back to her, his silence an ominous warning. Finally, he dropped the edge of the curtain and turned. “He was not unfaithful to you, my lady. He cares for you too much.”

  She shook her head, the doubts not willing to go away. Not yet. “You saw them, Lord Chardwell. Did you see something different than the rest of us?”

  “No. I saw the same as you. A scene carefully orchestrated to convince us all that he and Lady Paxton were having an affair.”

  Chardwell poured himself a cup of tea, then leaned back in his chair. “Except, I remained with your husband after the guests left. After you abandoned him. I sat in his room for the fourteen hours it took until he woke.

  “And I stayed with him when he became violently ill from the affects of the drug.” He took another swallow of tea, then leaned forward and placed his cup and saucer on the table. “And I furnished the two bottles of whiskey it took until he passed out after he’d been to see you and he realized that you’d never believe what Lady Paxton had done to him.”

  She clutched her fingers around the cushions of her chair until they ached. “What possible reason can there be for Lady Paxton to involve herself in such a scandal?”

  “I don’t know. And neither does your husband.”

  “But you’re sure nothing happened between Joshua and Lady Paxton.”

  He shrugged his shoulders. “I am. But you can believe what you want. The choice is yours.”

  She couldn’t fight her way through the turmoil flooding her mind. She felt as if her heart was being pulled from her chest. But Chardwell was right. The choice was hers. And whatever decision she made, it would affect the rest of her life.

  She could either take Joshua at his word and trust that he’d kept his vow to be faithful to her. Or she could make the break clean and final, and never have to live with the doubts and fears and mistrust again. Never have to risk that her husband would be unfaithful and live with the humiliation when Society discovered his indiscretions.

  It was all a matter of choice. Her choice.

  She slowly lifted her head. “I need your help, Lord Chardwell.”

  The frown on his face deepened.

  “I am going to host a ball on Wednesday night. I need you to make certain my husband is there.”

  His brows arched high. “Why?”

  “The reasons are my own.”

  Chardwell hesitated a long time as if evaluating his decision. Finally he took a deep breath that lifted his broad shoulders.

  “I’ll try. That’s all I can promise.”

  Chapter 20

  Allison stood at the bottom of the ballroom stairs and greeted one curious guest after another. There didn’t seem to be an end to the steady stream of nobility who’d accepted her impromptu invitation. Joshua’s London townhouse was filled to overflowing, which was exactly what she intended.

  Every room was packed, from the card room to the dining room to the long gallery. Even the terrace leading from the ballroom was crowded with as many people as could squeeze out there. Not one of the ton wanted to miss a single moment of anything that might occur tonight.

  All eyes focused on her, watching, just in case the rumors tha
t circulated throughout the room were true and the Marquess of Montfort did arrive. No one wanted to miss her reaction. Miss what promised to be an explosive situation.

  The anticipation was nearly palpable, the prevailing mood of the guests growing to a fever-pitched frenzy.

  There was a carnival atmosphere in the house. As if all in attendance knew something was about to happen. Why would the Marchioness of Montfort host a ball when she was embroiled in such a devastating scandal? What would make her so brave as to face the public a few weeks after her husband humiliated her so soundly? What could she hope to accomplish by inviting such a crowd?

  The answer: Revenge.

  The opinion was unanimous. She wanted to humiliate Lord Montfort in return for what he’d done. And she wanted the entire ton to witness her husband’s debasement.

  Those were the whispered comments circulating the room. Consequently, not one of the guests took the chance to venture too far from where she stood. None of them wanted to miss even one second of the spectacle they all knew would fill the gossip mills for weeks to come.

  She tried to slow her pounding heart, but as each minute passed without Joshua making an appearance, her nerves raced out of control.

  What if he didn’t come?

  She greeted her next guests, the Earl and Countess of Fillmore, with a fixed smile on her face and a false show of bravado. She reached out a trembling hand and said the correct words, even though her legs felt weak beneath her. The roar from the growing crowd was deafening, thundering in her head, threatening to suffocate her. She’d made her choice and she needed all of Society to know what she’d decided.

  What if he didn’t come?

  She forced another smile to her face and looked around the room.

  As if in answer to her prayer, she heard a collective gasp, then saw the looks of shock on everyone’s face as they lifted their gaze to the top of the stairs. As if on cue, the deafening roar from the crowd quieted.