The SEAL's Promise (Safehouse Security)
Page 24
If he thought that, then he was stupid. She had fallen for a moron.
"I was scared," he said. "For so many reasons. I don't get scared. I don't know scared. But I was… No, I am scared out of my mind."
Impossible. Nothing scared this man. "Why?" she whispered.
"I don't know."
It was like a sledgehammer of reality, reminding her of him. She pushed away and out of his arms before he could protest. "Then that's something you should've figured out before you got here." She stormed away, angry at both of them that she'd let her guard down. "Leave. I have to pack."
"Tessa, you're not moving. You're not going anywhere."
"Your directives don't matter anymore, McKay."
"Directives?" he muttered, and then added, "Stop calling me McKay."
She ignored him, needing space for clarity, and shuffled toward the kitchen. Regaining her wits, she said, "I'll call you whatever I want. Moron. Jerk. Liar."
He stalked close behind her. "I never meant to lie to you. I don't even know how I lied."
"You led me on. And the whole it's-not-you, it's-me spiel? I expected more creativity from you."
He thumped a heavy fist on her counter. "I was protecting you."
"From what?" she screamed and threw a mug against the wall, shattering across the floor. "I survived crazed men and kidnappings! More than once!"
Drake, surrounded by the shattered mug, ran his hand into his hair, and then took a long breath. "None of that would've happened if it weren't for me. If you didn't know me, no one would have chased you; no one would have kidnapped you."
Tessa wanted to run away, but the ceramic shards and bare feet kept her in place. "If I didn't know you, then I'd be dead in a cheap motel room in Lexington, Kentucky. You saved me."
They were in a standoff, need versus emotion. Their eyes locked. Her stomach tightened, electricity buzzing around their showdown.
He stepped closer. The mug crunched under his boots.
Tessa held up her hand like a stop sign. "Don't you dare come any closer, McKay."
"Drake." He took another step. His boot crunched again over the broken mug. "The name's Drake, and I've hated every single second away from you."
"Get out."
His last step closed the distance. "Not a chance."
He clasped his hand under her hair, leaned over, and breathed in. Her heart stilled. Her breathing stopped. His sweet lips crushed over her mouth, and the world froze before her lips swept against his.
Her soul rejoiced. She melted into his embrace as shivers raced down her spine. She'd missed him more than she could understand.
But even now, as she drew back from his kiss, trying to understand how she could be so angry and yet need him so much, she didn't know what to do.
Drake looked about how she felt. "Do you remember what I said—about you and me?"
She rolled her lips together, still reeling from the polar opposite feelings inside her and the fuzzy way his kiss made her head cloud. "I don't."
"Tessa, I've needed you my whole life." He cupped her chin and brushed his thumbs over her cheeks. "I said it, and I meant it. But I couldn't handle it, so I messed up."
"Oh." Her eyes burned like she might cry, and her heart pounded for his arms to wrap her close again.
"You opened my eyes. I didn't know how to need something like I need you."
Tessa licked her bottom lip. "Drake…"
"If I had you and I really lost you." He shook his head. "I promise. I won't survive."
"You did have me," she whispered.
"Did." Pain creased at the corner of his eyes. "But now I don't?"
Of course he did! But she couldn't risk this kind of hurt again and would never tell him the truth. She twisted away. "I have to pack."
He caught her arm, meeting her gaze. "That's not an answer."
"A kiss won't change anything."
"It can say I'm sorry."
She shook her head. "A kiss can say anything you want it to, but that's not what it means." Though she'd be a liar if she managed to tell him their kisses didn't mean anything. They meant the world to her—more than that. The future. The thought was terrifying.
Tension tightened in her shoulders, and she needed to carry on without showing him just how much he meant to her.
He shook his head. "I see what you're doing."
She scowled. "I'm not doing anything. Other than asking you to leave again."
"You're throwing up those stupid walls just so you can kick me out and finish a pint of melted ice cream."
How could he know her so well? She panicked and quickly tried to save face. "All's forgiven, Drake. We're both sorry. There aren't any walls. Thanks for stopping by, but you have to go."
He stepped forward. "Give me a break."
"Raising your voice isn't going to change anything."
"Come on, Tessa." He slammed his hands on the wall. "I'm in love with you. Don't you know that?"
Her jaw fell. Tears pricked, and she wanted him to disappear. She couldn't risk this kind of conversation, where the truth would come out.
"There it is." He ran a hand into his hair, then dropped his head before spearing her with an intense gaze. "I'm laying all the cards on the table. I love you, Tessa Thompson."
She needed an escape and had to get around him, but she was blocked in the kitchen and broken pieces of her mug covered the floor. On tiptoes, she tried to push around him, but he countered her move and put his hands on her shoulders. "What are you going to say now?"
Her eyes closed. "You're not telling the truth. You can't be."
He laughed. "Open your eyes and look at me. Then tell me I'm wrong. Tell me again it's a lie."
She opened her eyes but couldn't find any words.
"I love you, Tessa. But what's it going to be? Do you love me too?"
Scared, she studied the scar under his eye, and whispered, "What do you want from me?"
"You, doll. All I want is you." He took her hands in his, covering them between his palms and dropped to one knee. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want Anna to have a mom, maybe brothers and sisters. I want a family. A life together. I want it all, and I want it with you."
Her mouth gaped open. She couldn't rationalize what was happening.
Drake squeezed her fingers. "And, I'm praying that you love me and want those things too."
Unsteady on her feet, she choked on her thought as she battled past her worries. Then she pulled a long, deep breath. "The truth is…" She loved him more than any woman should love a man. But still, the words jumbled in her brain. She had too many thoughts to share that she couldn't get them in order.
He stiffened and pushed off his knee, giving her a no-worries grin that was so fake she could feel his hurt. "Got it. Don't worry; I'll let myself out."
His boots clunked hard on her floor, heading toward the front door.
What was happening? Wait, no. This was all wrong. "Drake, stop."
He stopped but didn't turn to face her. She couldn't breathe. Her mind was swimming. There was a very strong possibility she might pass out. "Don't leave. Please." Her voice cracked. "I can't lose you again."
He pivoted but stayed put, watching her warily.
Tessa had searched for so many things in her life, but right now, she searched inside her heart and prayed for the strength to give herself completely to the man she, from this point forward, would trust without question. "I love you, too."
His eyes tightened as though he wasn't sure what he'd heard.
Tessa beamed, shocked how the truth lifted an unseen weight from her soul. She was overwhelmed with confidence. "I love you so much that it scared me, too." Emotion caught in her throat as he rushed toward her. Drake wrapped his arms around her and lifted. Happy tears slid down her cheeks, and she whispered, "I'm not scared any longer. I promise."
He wrapped her into an all-consuming hug.
Tessa buried her face into his neck. "I love you, Drake."
EPILOGUE
The sun set on the lake. Tessa leaned on her elbows and dangled her feet off the dock. Their dog ran rampant, in and out of the lake water, splashing and spraying Drake and Anna. He walked in a shallow section, the water lapping at his thighs, and Anna kicked on her daddy's shoulder. Every time he dipped her legs into the water, she flapped her arms and squealed for more.
The gold band on Tessa's left ring finger felt less and less foreign. They'd gotten married in a small ceremony, with some family and several friends, in Drake's backyard. Their backyard, their home. He reminded her anytime she misspoke.
Family. The word once sent shudders of sick dread sweeping over her skin. But now, her family was lounging at the lake. Her growing family.
Tessa had a feeling but didn't want to admit it until she took the test. She swung by the store, picked up two boxes and two bottles of water, hiding them in the cart, not even wanting to look at them for fear of jinxing her hopes. She chugged the water on the way home and ran to the bathroom. Two tests later, it was as official as a home pregnancy test could get, and she couldn't stop beaming. They were pregnant.
Drake would be just as excited. She had wanted to wait until tonight in bed, when he held her close, but keeping the news to herself even a moment longer was unbearable.
"Hey, come here a sec," Tessa called over to Drake, as he pointed to the lake fishes flitting around his legs.
He looked up, smiling. "Come on, Mama. Don't make us stop. We're playing."
Their beautiful faces melted her heart. The minute she came home with him, he started calling her Mama. Her stomach flipped each time he said it. Not only were they all one family, but she was the mama. Now, more than he even realized.
"But I've got a surprise for you two." Tessa couldn't contain herself, so she dropped her head back, sunning until they made their way over. Drake jumped out of the water with Anna and plopped down next to Tessa, his wet swimming trunks dripping water on her leg.
"A surprise, huh? Whatcha got for us?" He adjusted the wriggling little girl on his wet knee and held her in place.
"How do you feel about two under two?" Tessa asked.
He stared blankly. "Two what?"
"Two little ones."
"You already know. Wait—" He gave a look of warning, not to be messed with. But a smile spread wide. "Are you?"
Tessa nodded and threw her arms around them. "We're having another baby."
Drake wrapped his strong arms around Tessa and Anna and hugged, smiling against her cheek.
A husband, two babies, and a promise of a lifetime together to enjoy their family. It was exactly what Tessa McKay never knew she needed.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Grace Alexander writes action-packed romance novels with military heroes and happy endings. She leaves the steamy scenes to her alter-ego, NYT bestselling author Cristin Harber. Have no fear! She promises swoon-worthy suspense and heroes who defy death while falling in love. The Safehouse Security series includes "sweeter" version of her bestselling romance novels.
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Safehouse Security:
The SEAL's Return
The SEAL's Promise
The Spy's Second Chance
The Commander's Betrayal
The Soldier's Wife
Visit Cristin Harber's Amazon author page to read steamy romantic suspense novels that are available in Kindle Unlimited.
COPYRIGHT
© 2019 Grace Alexander
ISBN-13: 978-1-951085-11-7
All rights reserved. This book or any portions thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author and publisher except for the use of brief quotations used in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either the products of the author's imagination or are used fictionally.