Jaded by Love: A Single Parent Romance (Written in the Stars Book 8)

by AJ Alexander

  “You can’t let a few terrible experiences make you close your heart off from finding love.” I whisper as I kneel next to her, cupping her cheek with my hand. Audrey closes her eyes and nuzzles into my palm. “The part of myself I lost when Lydia died has finally found its way back to me. It’s all because of you, Audrey.”

  The primal urge to claim her is replaced by the desire to care for her and Love, to give them everything they deserve. I gently brush my lips against hers, and when she doesn’t respond I do it again but with more force this time. Her lips move against mine until I slide the tip of my tongue against them, begging for entrance. Audrey parts her lips slightly and I devour her mouth with my own, putting all my feelings into this kiss. Wanting to show her how much she has come to mean to me in this short amount of time.

  We break apart, gasping for air and I rest my forehead against hers. “Let me love you.” I beg, waiting for her to give me a signal that she is ready to become mine.

  “Show me, Connor. Show me what it means to be loved by you.” She places a gentle kiss on the tip of my nose as I push my arm underneath her legs and wrap the other around her shoulders, lifting her into my arms. I grimace slightly as pain shoots down my back but stand quickly and stride toward the stairs taking them two at a time. “I can walk you know,” Audrey giggles before burying her nose into my chest.

  “I know you can, but you don’t have to.” I place a gentle kiss on her forehead before heading into my room and shutting the door. I hear music blasting through Jade’s closed door and thank the powers that be. The last thing either of us needs is to explain anything the girls may hear coming from my room. They know all about the birds and the bees, but I finally have Audrey where I want her. I’ll be damned if I waste any more time before claiming her as my own.

  I drop her onto the bed with a bounce before placing my body onto hers, pinning her in place with my body. “Everything will change after this, Audrey. If you want to stop at any time, just let me know.”

  She licks her lips, leaning forward and gripping my ear between her teeth. I groan and grind my cock into her stomach.

  “Yes,” is the only thing she says as my hand snakes between us toward the button of her jeans. Unfastening her pants, I lean back on my knees and pull them down her legs, tossing them to the floor. Spreading her legs wide, I settle between them and run my nose up her slit, “I’ve been dying to get a taste of your pussy.”

  “What are you waiting for?” she questions as I pull her panties to the side, locking eyes with her as I lick her pussy.

  “You taste like sunshine and honey, like everything good in the world,” I groan as I plunge my tongue between her folds. Her essence floods my mouth as I suction her clit, desperate to get every drop into my mouth.

  “Oh, god,” she moans, biting down on her lip to keep quiet. “I’ve never…” her words trail off as I delve a finger inside her. “It’s never felt like this before.”

  “And it never will with anyone else. Don’t you feel it, Audrey?” I grind my cock into the mattress and groan before inserting a second finger inside her.

  “Yes,” she whispers, threading her fingers through my hair and tugging lightly “Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop.”

  “So fucking tight, gorgeous. I could stay between your legs forever.” She arches off the bed, and I use my other arm to hold her in place.

  Her pussy tightens around my tongue as she climbs higher and higher toward release. I find her g-spot with my finger and caress it, “Cum for me. Give me everything.”

  I latch onto her clit once again and suck, sending her flying over the edge as she moans my name. I continue to nibble and lick at her as she comes back down to earth. Pulling my fingers out of her pussy, shoving them into my mouth and lick them clean.

  I stand and unfasten my jeans, pushing them down and stepping out of them. Locking eyes with Audrey, I push my boxers to the floor and my cock springs free. Audrey licks her lips in anticipation as she lifts to her knees and grips my cock into her hands.

  Chapter Eleven

  Audrey

  I wrap my tongue around the tip of his cock, pulling it slightly between my lips. I look up at Connor, startled by what I see. His eyes are full of desire, as they should be. But behind the desire, I see something else - love. I mentally chastise myself for thinking Connor could be in love with me so quickly before sinking down onto his shaft, taking most of him in my mouth.

  “That’s it, baby girl,” Connor shoves his hand into my hair, gently pushing his cock further into my mouth. I relax my throat and he slides in deeper, causing us both to groan. I slide up and down his shaft, taking more of him with each pass.

  “Fuck, your mouth was made for my cock, Audrey,” Connor says as he pulls from between my lips, “But I’m going to cum deep inside that pussy, making you mine once and for all.” He kneels down on the bed, giving a gentle push on my shoulder. I watch Connor stroke his cock as pre cum leaks from the tip onto his hand. Unable to resist any longer, I spread my legs and use two fingers to circle my clit.

  “That’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. Make yourself cum for me, I want to see your cum dripping out of that pussy and onto my bed.”

  I shut my eyes tightly as his fingers slip between my folds once again, "Imagine these are my cock and cum for me,” Connor curls his fingers slightly, hitting my g-spot for the second time before capturing my lips with his, swallowing my moan of pleasure, as I cum for a second time.

  I don’t even have time to come down for my orgasm before Connor pulls his fingers out and replaces them with his cock. “I feel so full,” I moan as he gently pulls out and thrusts back in. Then I notice his arms bulging as he fights to maintain his control. I’ve never felt so cherished by a man before, but right now I need Connor in a way I can’t put into words. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I dig my heels into his ass. “I don’t need slow and sweet. Fuck me, Connor.”

  “I don’t want to hurt you.” He gets out between clenched teeth.

  “Give me all of you, Connor. No holding back.” That’s all it takes for him to let loose and begin pounding my pussy into submission.

  “You’re mine, Audrey,” he growls as he reaches between us and pinches my clit between two fingers, sending a wave of pleasure through my entire body. “Say it.” When I don’t respond, he stops. His cock is pulsing inside me, begging for release. “Say it, Audrey. Say you will be mine.”

  “Yours. I’m yours,” I moan as he pulls out and slams back into me at a punishing pace, it only takes a few minutes before both of us tumble over the edge together. He pumps into me a few more times before rolling to the side and wrapping me in his muscular arms. “You’re mine, Audrey. Now and forever,” he whispers before placing a gentle kiss on my shoulder.

  As I drift off to sleep, I know what I said was true. There is no one else in this world for me beside Connor. He is the other half of my soul, but why does that thought terrify me?

  I sit straight up in the bed clutching my chest, right over my heart, and look around the room. As my eyes focus on the pile of clothes at the foot of the bed, Connor begins to stir beside me. “It’s too early to be awake.” He throws his arm across my waist, attempting to pull me back into the bed.

  “I have to go to the bathroom,” I whisper as I remove his arm and slide out of the bed, pulling the blanket with me.

  You weren’t this shy last night when his face was intimately acquainted with your pussy.

  My face pinks as memories of what happened fill my mind. I scoop my clothes off the floor and scurry to the bathroom quickly shutting the door.

  “What was I thinking?” I say to my reflection, turning on the faucet and splashing cool water onto my face. “I need to get home before the girls find me here. Lord knows what they’ll think if they see me here.”

  I quickly slip back into my clothes before quietly opening the bathroom door and heading out of the bedroom. Before exiting, I glance back at Connor sleeping on the bed. The sheet ha
s slipped down to his waist, showing off his chiseled form. Desire to return to bed and have a repeat performance of last night overcomes me, but I shake my head. “You need to figure out your life, not jump into a relationship again. Remember, Audrey, Love comes first,” I mumble into the quiet room before slipping out the door.

  “Trying to make a clean getaway?” I gasp in shock before spinning around and coming face-to-face with the girls standing at the top of the stairs.

  “I need to head into work. Can you let Connor know?” I choke out as I shut the door.

  “Sure thing, Audrey.” Jade chimes in as I attempt to brush past them and head down the stairs, but Love grips my elbow.

  “You don’t need to be embarrassed, Mom. There’s a reason why we turned the music up so loud.” She gives me a shy smile as Jade attempts to stifle a laugh.

  I shake my head, “I have to work, Love. Stay here with Connor and Jade or have him bring you to the studio when he wakes up.”

  “You don’t work today.” Love gives me a quizzical look as I pull from her grasp.

  “Bristol called. She wasn’t feeling well this morning and asked if I could run things until her stomach settles.” I give them a tight smile before heading down the stairs and straight out the front door.

  “I can’t believe I just lied to Love,” I chastise myself as I make my way back to the house. I always promised myself that I would tell my daughter the truth, no matter how difficult it might be. Out of my own embarrassment, shame, or whatever is going on in my mind right now, I lied. Partly to avoid having to explain what is going on, but mostly because I have no idea what’s happening myself. It was easier to tell her this small lie than to try to wrap my mind around my feelings for Connor right in this moment.

  “When she comes home later…” I trail off as I unlock my front door, heading directly for the bedroom. When she comes home, what? I’ll tell her I slept with Connor and promised to be his forever, but the thought of trusting someone with my heart again terrifies me. Yeah, that will go over well.

  As I cross into my room my cell phone rings, “Hey, girl,” Bristol’s voice comes across the line. “The baby is not too happy this morning. Is there any way you can open the studio and teach the first class for me this morning?”

  “No problem!” I respond a little too enthusiastically, “I’m just hopping into the shower and then I’ll head over. Feel better.” I get out, before hanging up the phone. I don’t want to take a chance that I might blurt out what happened. Another person I need to explain things to.

  Now having an excuse, I turn the shower on and strip off my clothes. As the bathroom fills with steam, my mind replays everything that happened between Connor and I last night. We had dinner, I told him about my past with Ian and then he gave me the best night of my life.

  It was more than just sex between us, I know that, but how can I trust something that happened so quickly? Is it even possible to fall in love with someone this fast? There are plenty of stories out there where people fall in love at first sight, but this is the real world. Happily ever afters aren’t that easy, you have to work for them.

  “Get your head out of the clouds, Audrey. All this love at first sight nonsense got you into this mess in the first place.” I open the shower door and step inside, closing it tightly behind me.

  But that doesn’t mean it’s not possible, right? I’ve felt a connection with Connor since we first met. Fate seems to be constantly placing us into each other’s paths. Is the universe trying to tell me something? Love’s words from yesterday filter through my mind while I lather my skin. “She does have a point…” Maybe I should check the cards and see what they have to say. I swore off them, but it won’t hurt to check them one more time to help me focus.

  Not bothering to wash my hair, I shut the water off and step out of the shower, wrapping a towel around myself. Ignoring my reflection, I reach into my top drawer, grab underwear, and at the last minute, my deck of tarot cards. I place the deck on the top of my dresser, drop my towel, and step into my underwear. Ignoring the deck of cards, I grab a sports bra and slam the drawer shut.

  “What’s the worst that the cards could say?” I whisper into my empty room as I shove my arms through the straps and pull the bra over my head.

  That a relationship with Connor is a lousy idea.

  I plop down on the edge of the bed, staring at my reflection in the mirror above my dresser. My curls are a rumpled mess, sticking out in every direction like a haystack, but what gets my attention is my eyes. There is a life to them that hasn’t been there in a while, maybe this thing with Connor is a good thing. I’ve never been afraid of what the cards have to tell me, why should I start now? Last night was fun, but can we go back to the way things were? We are adults, of course we can. Who am I kidding? Connor made it perfectly clear there was no going back once we slept together.

  Yes, I’m flighty and resist making a decision because I have this deck of cards, but that doesn’t mean they’ve ever led me wrong. My relationship with Ian was great, minus the part of him having a wife and kids back home in New Jersey. There was no way the cards could predict something like that.

  “Enough!” I shout, storming over to the deck of tarot cards. I take a deep breath to center myself before shuffling the deck, cutting it, and shutting my eyes. I take one final cleansing breath and ask my question, “Is a relationship with Connor a good idea?”

  I flip the top card over and open my eyes, looking directly into the mirror. It’s the devil card, the worst card to pull in a relationship draw. “I have my answer.” I whisper as tears fall down my cheeks like waterfalls. “There is no way I can have a healthy relationship with Connor Bennett.”

  I drop the rest of the deck as I pull out a random drawer and grab some clothes. I have no idea what I’m wearing, but it's better than going into public naked. Functioning on autopilot, I stumble out of my bedroom and down the stairs as my phone rings. Not even bothering to check the number, I hit accept, “Hello,” my voice sounds wrong even to me.

  “What happened?” Bristol questions from the other line.

  “Nothing. I’m fine, just leaving to head to the studio.” I inhale a deep breath and let it out slowly attempting to calm my emotions.

  “Actually, that’s why I called. I can teach my class this morning, enjoy your day off.”

  “No, I’ll come in.” My chest tightens as I panic. I need some place to hide and think alone, none of them will bother me if they know I’m working. “Please,” I beg.

  “Okay. I’ll meet you there,” Bristol responds in a clipped tone, before hanging up. She knows something is wrong but thankfully didn’t press the issue. I need to be prepared for an interrogation when I arrive at the studio. I hate hiding things from her, but I need time to process everything that is going on in my head.

  I grab my bag and yoga mat from beside the door and head out, almost forgetting to lock the door behind me. Once I’m in the car, I process everything that has happened. The cards have spoken. No matter how I spin it, Connor and I can’t be together. The devil card symbolizes every warning sign you would look for before entering a relationship.

  “He isn’t over Lydia.” My knuckles turn white as sadness turns to anger. That’s the most logical conclusion when the devil card appears. While I’m spouting off about finding love and someone to spend the rest of my life with, the only thing he was interested in is a quick roll in the hay. My anger continues to bubble beneath the surface as I pull into a parking spot. He said all the right things to get me into bed with him, but I won’t fall for that again.

  “What happened?” Bristol’s voice startles me as she knocks on the window, causing me to jump in surprise.

  I open the door and growl, “I fell for his tricks,” before storming past her and into the studio. Heading directly for the break room, I throw my bag onto the table and pace. “I can’t believe even after I told him everything that happened with Ian he’d do this to me.”

  Bristol sta
nds in my path, “You need to give me more information if I’m going to help. Who are we talking about?”

  I cross my arm over my chest, “Connor! I slept with him,” I shout before throwing my hands up in the air. “Even after I told him everything, he never saw me as anything more than a piece of ass.”

  “You’re wrong!” Bristol shouts, grabbing my shoulders and giving me a shake. “There’s no way Connor would treat you or anyone else that way.”

  “There’s no other explanation. I read my cards this morning…” I trail off as Bristol rolls her eyes at me.

  “When are you going to stop basing your fate on those darn tarot cards?”

  “The cards are always right,” I mumble, “I got the devil card.”

  “And? That’s what made you believe Connor was a complete asshole?” Bristol brushes past me and grabs a bottle of water from the cooler, quickly twisting off the cap and taking a swig. “Connor is the best thing that ever happened to you and Love. Don’t let some stupid cards predict your happiness.”

  I lean against the door frame and think about everything Bristol said. I’m letting my attachment to those cards get in the way again. Connor is a devoted father and has been nothing but truthful with me since I arrived in town. If the rumor mill in town is correct, Connor hasn’t been with anyone since Lydia died, only me. There’s no way he was intentionally leading me on, but the cards still say we aren’t meant to be together.

  “You’re right. There’s no way Connor would use me, but we can’t be together.”

  “Why is that?” Bristol grabs my hand, pulling me into the room. We both have a seat at the small table in the break room.

  “He wants a relationship and that’s not something I can give him right now. I need to focus on Love. If something were to go wrong between us, I don’t want to uproot her again.”

  “Instead of worrying about the things that could go wrong, why not focus on what could go right? Maybe he is the reason the universe sent you here in the first place?” Bristol laughs, “There hasn’t been one person who caught his eye in fourteen years, but you. If that isn’t a sign from the universe, I don’t know what is.”