Julie stared at the other woman. Had she deflected on purpose? Was she hiding something? Or just being her typical impatient self?
Before she could ask again, Ben joined them, all business, and quickly got everyone onboard the Cessna and buckled into their seats.
“Felix, you want the right seat? That’s where the copilot would sit, if we had one. So I guess that’s you today, buddy.”
Felix’s face lit with delight. Ben helped him with the harness, which meant he had to make some physical contact, though he clearly tried to keep it to a minimum. Julie watched closely, but caught no sign of distress from Felix. Ben had such an easy manner with him, but then again, he did with everyone.
No point in heading down that road, she reminded herself. For the first time, she’d gotten a look past Ben’s lighthearted manner and seen how much pain she’d caused him. She was foolish to think that a few words of apology could make up for that. She’d been foolish to come back to Jupiter Point. She and Felix should leave tomorrow, or as soon as the Reinhards had had enough family bonding.
Ben flicked switches and watched the instruments as he spoke into his mic, communicating with an air traffic control tower somewhere. With every action, he explained to Felix what he was doing. He pointed out the yoke, the rudder controls, the throttle. Her godson soaked in every bit of information like a solemn sponge.
He also did his share of showing off. “That’s the altimeter, that Garmin 530 is the GPS, that’s the air speed indicator, that’s the external temperature gauge.”
“I thought this was your first time in a small plane.” Ben sounded appropriately impressed.
“It is. I studied an instrument diagram.”
“Nice. Well, pictures are great, but there’s nothing like the real thing in action. You ready?”
Felix nodded seriously. His entire body quivered with excitement.
Ben taxied into position at the end of the runway, then executed a little circle. “That’s mostly a formality to make sure no other planes are around,” he explained. “All set for takeoff, folks.” He added power and the plane cruised down the runway, picking up speed. The entire craft rattled and shook. Julie clutched the edges of her seat and held her breath.
“Here we go.” Ben eased the yoke back as the plane gained speed and they lifted into the air.
An incredible feeling filled her up. Free. That was how it felt. Free from troubles, free from demands, free from gravity. She laughed exultantly as the low-lying meadows tilted away, replaced by sparkling waves, then the coastline, then a bright flash of sun in her eyes, bluer than blue sky, then sweet puffs of clouds.
“This is amazing!” She shouted into her headset, forgetting that she had no need to yell over the engine noise. They could all hear each other perfectly well through their headsets.
Ben chuckled in response, and for that one moment, they were perfectly in tune. Even though she was in the farthest backseat, along with Sarah, and Ben was all the way up front, they may as well have been alone in the sky. She felt as if he were right there with her, in her ear, in her head, laughing with the same joy that filled her.
New words and melodies came into her head. She hummed them to herself, chasing down the notes as if they were butterflies she was trying to capture in a net. It took all her concentration, and everything else faded away, even Ben.
Da-da-dee, da-da-dum…da dee… She was so enraptured with the bright rush of sky and clouds and waves and music that she almost missed the fact that something was wrong.
Then Mr. Reinhard’s tense voice cut through her happy trance. She blinked back to reality and saw that he was leaning forward, his hand on Felix’s shoulder.
“Get a grip on yourself, little man.”
Felix was whimpering. Why was Mr. Reinhard touching him? Didn’t he know not to do that uninvited? It always made things worse.
Ben seemed to understand. He reached over and pushed the older man’s hand away. “Please sit back in your seat,” he told him sternly.
“But he’s acting like a baby. Felix, stop it. This minute!”
Julie craned her neck, trying to see what was wrong, what the hell was happening. “What is it?” she called. Why did she have to be so far away from Felix? If only she could be in the middle seat, where she could handle the situation.
She tried again. “Ben, what’s wrong?” Next to her, Sarah was also talking into the comm, saying things like, “Felix, are you scared? Don’t worry, we won’t crash.” Which was fine, except that Julie couldn’t get her own words to be heard through the din. And the worst thing for Felix was too much sensory input. Too much noise, too much light, too much touch—all things that could tip him over the edge.
She started to pull off her seat belt, determined to scramble over the Reinhards so she could reach Felix. But then Ben’s firm, commanding voice cut through the noise.
“I’m going to need everyone to calm down and stop talking. That means you, Sarah. Right now.”
The little girl snapped her mouth shut. Julie was about to ask again what was going on, but Ben forestalled her. “I got this, Julie. Stay put.”
She bit her lip, tears of worry stinging her eyes.
Mr. Reinhard spoke again. “I will not have my grandson making a scene—”
And then her headset went quiet. Ben must have cut the comms. The hum of the plane was all Julie could hear. She watched Ben smile at Felix, watched her godson’s green face tilt desperately toward him. Ben pulled an air sickness bag from between the seats and deftly flicked it open one-handed. Felix grabbed it and, with a huge convulsion, heaved the contents of his stomach into it. The sour smell of vomit filled the plane. Followed by the scent of urine.
Oh God. The poor kid.
Ben cut the trip short after that disaster. As soon as they stepped onto the tarmac, the Reinhards began their apologies. Ben walked around the plane, putting chocking the wheels.
“Never have I been so embarrassed,” Priscilla began.
“Believe me, we’ll be having a few words with the boy,” added Adam.
Felix, still queasy, scuffed one foot on the tarmac. He hadn’t said a word since he’d emptied his stomach on the plane. Sarah hovered anxiously next to him, but he wouldn’t look at her. Felix was an unusual boy in many respects, but he was just as easily shamed as any other kid. When he was younger, an incident like this could trigger a meltdown. Please, Lord, no meltdown. Not here.
“It could happen to anyone,” Julie reassured him. “That’s why planes have airsickness bags. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
Felix stared at the ground, refusing to respond.
Ben ducked under the wing. “She’s right. Remember the first time I went up, Julie?”
Not really, but she went with it, for Felix’s sake. “It was a disaster, right?”
“Yeah, the only good thing about it is we didn’t crash. That’s been my motto ever since. If you don’t crash, it was a good trip.”
“That’s a kind way of looking at it, but he peed his pants. We’ll compensate you for the cleaning bill, of course—”
Ben waved that off. “We’re prepared for that sort of thing. I have to hand it to Felix. He’s a brave kid. No complaints whatsoever. I remember when I flew my first mission, I was so damn scared I cried. Actual tears on my face. Might have been some pee involved too, it’s all a blur now.” He crouched next to Felix and smiled at him with easy kindness. Julie remembered that smile so well—it had shone like sunlight on some of the toughest moments of her life.
“How does that ground feel under your feet? Little shaky still?”
Felix nodded.
“Listen to me. Anyone who doesn’t feel a healthy dose of alarm riding in a metal box held up by air flowing over its wings is fooling themselves. So don’t beat up on yourself.”
“It’s called lift. It’s a difference in air pressure.” Felix spoke in a small voice, but it brought Julie a rush of relief. If he was willing to talk, he’d be okay.
“You’re ri
ght. I can tell you’ve studied how airplanes work. Actually flying in one is a little different, and the first ride can really throw you for a loop. I threw up my first time too. Some of the best pilots, the ones who become astronauts and daredevils, they have all kinds of physiological reactions. But now you’re prepared. Next time won’t be as bad.”
“Next time!” Priscilla exclaimed. “Absolutely not. He’s not cut out for flying, clearly. You know he’s on the spectrum, don’t you?”
Julie could have throttled her. How insensitive could she be? Anyone could get airsick; why blame it on his atypical neurology?
“All due respect, Mrs. Reinhard, but none of us are ‘cut out for flying.’ You don’t see wings on us, do you? It’s up to Felix whether he likes it or not. I won’t blame him if he doesn’t. It’s no fun getting sick. But if he wants to give it another go, I’d be happy to take him up again.”
Ben was still crouched next to Felix, at eye level with him. Felix finally lifted his head and studied him for a long moment.
Julie held her breath. Felix so rarely gave anyone a second chance. Once he had a bad experience with someone, he put up his walls and refused to take them down. But Ben was—Ben. Even this new version of him was irresistibly kind and emotionally generous. He might be angry with her, but he’d never take that out on Felix.
Felix’s mouth finally lifted at the corners. He stuck out his hand.
After a quick moment of surprise, Ben took it and gave it a brief shake. “Deal, then. You name the time and I’ll be there. Just us next time, maybe.”
“And Julie,” Felix said. “Sarah can come too if she wants.”
That was a definite snub of the Reinhards, which they didn’t miss. Priscilla turned on her heel and stalked toward their Rolls.
Julie sighed, knowing she’d have to spend some time smoothing ruffled feathers later. Why did the Reinhards never understand that their harshness affected people? Especially Felix, who had less control over his emotions than most kids. Would Felix and his grandparents ever figure out a way to get along? It seemed impossible.
“Felix, why don’t you go find the bathroom and get a drink of water?” she told him.
Sarah skipped next to him. “I’ll show him where it is!” The two kids set off toward the reception office, and Julie turned to Ben.
“I’ll clean up that vomit.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Come on, Ben, it’s the least I can do. I’m a professional. I’ll have it spit and polished and good as new in no time.”
He rubbed his forehead with the heel of his hand. “No, Julie. Don’t worry about the 206. Take care of Felix. I don’t like the way the Reinhards treat him. Brings back some bad memories.”
She laughed ruefully. “No kidding. I was hoping they’d mellowed over the past twelve years, but I think they’ve gotten worse. Or maybe I have less tolerance for it, especially when Felix is involved. Thanks for handling them so well.”
He shot her an odd look, and shrugged. “What’s to handle? They never liked me, and I knew it. Never lost any sleep over it. By the way, I think I have a smallish set of coveralls Felix can wear. The Reinhards probably don’t want pee on the seat of their Rolls.”
She followed him across the tarmac, catching up so they could walk side by side. “What makes you think the Reinhards didn’t like you?”
“Well, they basically said it. They said I was getting in your way.”
Startled, she made a gesture that made her hand brush against his. Tingles rushed up her skin, a geyser of sensation. She took a step to the side. He didn’t seem to notice, though a muscle ticked in his jaw.
“When did they tell you that? This is news to me.”
“They told me—” He broke off, then stopped walking and turned to face her. In contrast to the kindness he’d shown Felix, his face now wore a blank mask. “You really want to do this? Dig everything up and dissect it? What does it matter when they told me? It’s ancient history. You were gone, and that’s really all I needed to know.”
She drew in a sharp breath. “So they told you that after I left? That you were getting in my way?” The suspicion she’d had earlier, that the Reinhards might have interfered somehow, came back stronger than ever. “What else did they say? Didn’t they give you my message?”
She saw the hurt behind his flat gaze, the muscle still working in his jaw. “Of course they did. That’s the only reason I knew about your plans.”
Disappointment cratered through her stomach. “So you did know about my plans.” And yet still, he’d stood her up.
Sarah came hurtling out of the office building. “Felix needs Miss Julie’s help. He needs something to wear. I told him he could just tie my jacket around his waist but he thought that was stupid.”
“Coming in just a sec,” Julie called to her. One more minute, that was all she needed to sort this out.
But Ben had already turned away. “I’ll get those coveralls from the hangar.”
And he was gone, leaving only the aftereffect of his presence—faster-than-normal heartbeat, the pulse beating in her throat, hand still tingling from that brief touch.
She let out a long exhale and followed Sarah to the restroom where Felix was waiting.
Maybe he was right, and there was no point in digging up the past and dissecting everything. This wasn’t some archeological dig. She had to focus on Felix, not her and Ben’s ancient history.
There was only one thing she absolutely had to relive, and that didn’t need to involve Ben. On Monday, while Felix was in school, she was going to meet with Will Knight. Once she told him everything, one of her main purposes for coming back to Jupiter Point would be accomplished.
Felix was probably even more eager to go home to LA now. No matter how nice Ben was about it, how could Felix ever forget that he’d thrown up and peed his pants—in front of his grandparents and an adorable little girl? That was the kind of thing you never lived down.
Sigh. She probably ought to go ahead and book their return tickets now.
10
On Sundays, the Knight brothers liked to barbecue. Now that there were women in the family, the barbecues had expanded to include things like fruit salad and dessert. Sometimes even green salad, Lord help them. For some reason, Ben always cooked the burgers even though he was arguably the worst at it.
“Never fear,” he told them all as he hunched over the grill behind the farmhouse where Tobias, Carolyn and Sarah now lived. “I’ve consulted some cookbooks and I think I have it down now. No more charcoal burgers from Ben Knight.”
“End of an era.” With a beer bottle, Tobias saluted Ben from his lawn chair, where he sat with legs akimbo, hand interlaced with Carolyn’s. Only Sarah was missing; she was taking a nap upstairs. They all wore hats and scarves on this winter Sunday, because no bad weather would keep the Knights from their barbecue.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” Ben said, peering carefully at the array of burgers on the grill.
“Where did the best part come in? Must have missed that.”
Ben showed him a middle finger, then carefully lifted one corner of a patty. Was it done? It was pinkish-brownish.
The back door opened and slammed shut, then Merry emerged carrying a giant wooden bowl of Greek salad.
“Are those vegetables I spy? Never thought I’d see the day.” Carolyn affectionately rubbed her cheek on Tobias’s sleeve. Ben felt such deep envy that he lost his breath for a moment. Once upon a time, that had been him, sharing the utter comfort of companionship with Julie.
You’ve changed, she’d said, her clear eyes scanning his face, showing uncertainty and doubt. That look still bothered him. Maybe some things had changed. But not everything.
“This salad is the result of some serious negotiations.” Merry mock-glared at Will, who followed behind her with a platter of garlic bread. “We had to work out a greens-to-carb-to-meat ratio that didn’t completely destroy the Knight family legacy.”
> Tobias and Ben both saluted their older brother, who gave a mocking bow. “I tried to convince her that relish counted as a green, but she wasn’t buying it.”
Ben flipped the burgers and let the conversation flow over him. It was ironic that his two brothers had found happy relationships before he had. Neither of them had ever seemed interested in “settling down.” Yet here they were. And here he was. Still single and manning the grill while they cuddled with their soul mates.
Ben mechanically poked at the burgers, his thoughts drifting in their usual direction—toward Julie. And Felix, too. He was “on the spectrum,” according to Mrs. Reinhard. After they’d all left, he’d googled the term and learned that it meant Felix had a certain degree of autism. He’d read all the information he could find, and it definitely explained some of Felix’s behavior. His wariness about being touched, his unexpected reactions to things, his intense and obsessive thirst for information when something caught his interest.
Not an easy kid. He tried to imagine Savannah coping with a child that challenging. Hard to picture. Was that why Julie had stepped in to help, the way she always did? Was that why she wasn’t a famous singer by now? She’d spent the years helping with Felix, not working the music biz?
“Ben, did you hear me?”
He startled, nearly jarring a burger from his spatula. “Sorry, what?”
“Do you know what Julie wants to talk to me about tomorrow?” Will put a hand on his shoulder, brother-style.
“Uh, no. No idea.”
“I got the impression it has something to do with Dad.”
Ben’s head jerked up. What could Julie possibly know about the murder? She’d disappeared before it happened. She’d never even sent condolences or a sympathy note. “I want to be there.”
God, wasn’t he trying to not get distracted by Julie? This was different, though. Anything having to do with finding their father’s killer, he was all in.
“I’ll have to ask her. She might prefer a private meeting.”
“Fine. Ask her. But you know something? I don’t care if she doesn’t want me there. She owes me.” He slid the rest of the burgers onto the platter and carried them to the picnic table. Will followed him, and the others gathered around as well.
Hot and Bothered Page 7
