Re:ZERO -Starting Life in Another World-, Vol. 9

by Tappei Nagatsuki

  “Well, all that being said, we can’t have her crying again. With that, I’ll leave her to you.”

  “Yes, leave her to me.”

  Though his tone remained mischievous, Subaru handed the baby over with exceptional gentleness. The woman made a charming little smile as she took Spica, handling her like a precious treasure. Then she hugged Spica snugly against her chest, gently rocking the baby’s body to put her at ease.

  “Yes, Father and Big Brother are helpless, aren’t they? Spica, you need to grow up soon so you can give them the proper scolding they deserve.”

  “Hey now, she can’t understand words yet, so can we not give her the special tutoring?”

  An image of the future came to mind: his mischief being followed by her and Spica sandwiching him, hands on their hips in a pronounced huff. That scene, with them angry at him and Rigel both, was just—

  “Er, now that I think of it, that’s not as bad as I thought, it’s really not! If anything, it comes off as one hell of a happy image of the future, doesn’t it?”

  “Leave me out of it. Having a little sister angry at me makes me look bad as an older brother.”

  “Well, it wouldn’t make you look bad if you’re lumped in with me. Your future… I can see it, I can see it…! Too soft to the little sister you like too much, kept under her thumb forever…you will be the Siscon King!!”

  “Hey, you’re the one who’s wrapped around a woman’s finger! I’ll never, ever be like that!”

  Subaru wagged his finger to fan the flames; a vein bulged on Rigel’s forehead as he protested. But Rigel’s statement made the blue-haired woman holding Spica knit her brows together.

  “Rigel—what is this manner of talking you’ve been using outside? It’s intolerable,” she said.

  “Uh, but, I mean…”

  “Mother hates hearing but and I mean. Besides, your earlier words are mistaken.”

  As Rigel hemmed and hawed, she scolded him without mercy; then she pressed her lips to Spica’s cheek and spoke.

  “Mother does not have Father wrapped around her finger. After all, Father is always Mother’s Number One.”

  Her cheeks reddened as she uttered something far more embarrassing than a baby crying on a public street.

  This time, confronted with a mother able to say that out loud, Rigel raised both hands in abject surrender. Even Subaru couldn’t do anything but awkwardly scratch a cheek.

  The reactions from her beloved family sent her happily passing a hand through her long hair.

  The stroke left Rem’s hair, blue and pretty like the sky, swaying gently in the wind.

  2

  In a corner of Banan City, part of the city-state of Kararagi, Subaru sat on a bench at the corner of a public park dotted with playgrounds, gazing absentmindedly at affairs inside the park.

  Directly in front of him, Rigel, his blue hair combed backward and spiky, was running around the public park, having fun with his friends. He might be cheeky to his own father, but he was an adorable kid, as befitted his age.

  “Now if only we could do something about those awful serial killer eyes…”

  “We will do nothing of the sort. That nasty look is part of who Rigel is. No matter how much fun he has, no matter how joyful he may be, his face will still make first acquaintances flinch with discomfort—that’s our Rigel.”

  “Hey, I can hear you. And Mom, your attempt to help hurt even more, you know?!”

  Rigel was caught and frozen in a game of freeze tag—passed down by Subaru himself—as he raised his voice in anger. Subaru and Rem both waved to their adorable son, seemingly to fan the flames like a proper husband and wife.

  The foul, vein-bulging look of dissatisfaction on Rigel’s face made him a dead ringer for a young Subaru.

  “In other words, I can already expect his future to go something like mine. I’d be in shock too if I were him… I mean, in twenty years he’s gonna turn into me.”

  “Would that not mean…a future where he marries a valiant wife, skilled in cooking and capable of all domestic affairs, who is also a wonderful and ideal bride?”

  “Hey, what’s that normie sellout garbage about? That can go jump in a… Wait, you meant me!”

  When Subaru put a hand against his head and stuck out his tongue, Rem couldn’t keep herself from sighing a little.

  “If you don’t deny it even a little, your wife will get carried away from being smothered in praise.”

  “What this about smothering you in praise? It’s just the truth. I seriously am a real-life sellout.”

  If Subaru were seriously trying to kill her with flattery, he would go much, much further. But they were in a public park in broad daylight. If he started saying sweet nothings to her, the idle chatter around them would drown out everything else. That wasn’t such a bad thing, but he wanted to fully enjoy the moment.

  His son was playing; his wife was gently holding their baby daughter. Subaru felt like falling asleep beside them. Sitting beside her was somehow making Subaru sleepy.

  “Er…”

  “If you wish to sleep, I will lend you my shoulder. Spica has monopolized my arms, after all.”

  When he opened one eye, he found that his head had come to rest on Rem’s shoulder as they sat side by side. With Rem so close, he could smell her sweet scent and feel her warmth. Subaru’s cheeks slackened as he looked Spica’s way.

  She had her father’s black hair and her mother’s adorable face. Her life was innocent, delicate, and so very lovely.

  “Damn you, Spica. Beloved daughter you may be, you’re one frightening schemer, taking over my holy ground like that.”

  “My breasts are occupied until evening, so please wait.”

  “Right now, we’re in a park in the middle of the day, so we’d better watch what we say, you know…”

  When Subaru’s eyes bulged at the audacious statement, the woman who had said it turned beet red.

  “Man, my family’s super adorable.”

  “Because you love them all each and every day.”

  Their gazing at each other made him feel funny, so Subaru accepted Rem’s offer and rested his head on her shoulder. The feel of her blue hair brushing against him felt amazingly good, making Subaru rub his face against it without thinking about it.

  “Someone wants to be tickled.”

  “Ah, sorry, it just felt sooo good. I’ll just learn from Spica and behave. Rigel can be the only one who can’t calm down. Wow, Rigel’s such a little kid!”

  “I can hear you, stupid dad! Don’t compare me to you!”

  “Rigel, your sister is sleeping, so please be considerate.”

  “It just ain’t fair!”

  The still-frozen Rigel shouted at the absurdity, but no one in the family backed him up. Adding to his woes, no one came to rescue Rigel from his frozen state. He was in quite an isolated position.

  Though he resembled Subaru in appearance and mannerisms, the surrounding children did not tease him about that, which Subaru thought was incredibly kind on their part, but…

  “You can’t turn out like that, Spica! Only Big Bro acting like that is enough. Well, you take after Mother, so your future is bright. I only pray you don’t get caught by a no-good man like me.”

  “There is no substitute for you. My darling is the greatest in the whole world.”

  Subaru gave a strained smile at Rem’s enthusiastic seal of approval. Silence fell between them for a time; but this was not an uncomfortable silence in any way. With the sun’s rays behind them, he gazed wistfully at his son being teased by his friends as he cuddled up to his wife, holding their daughter in her arms, and rested—it was a sweet, happy time.

  “—Subaru.”

  The abrupt calling of Subaru’s name made him open his closed eyes. When he glanced upward, Rem’s clear, light-blue eyes were gazing into his. Her moist eyes loosened Subaru’s tongue.

  “…It’s been a while since you’ve called me that. It’s been ‘darling’ and ‘Father
’ for ages.”

  “—”

  The words Subaru spoke upon waking made Rem purse her trembling lips.

  He was looking at the face Rem had often worn several years ago, right after they ran away. Subaru could tell even when Rem tried to hide it. After all, he’d always had his eyes on her.

  Bathed by the wind, Subaru narrowed his eyes. It had been Rem who’d invited him on a family outing that day. He’d guessed that she had a reason for that. After all—

  “Today…it’s been eight years since that day, huh?”

  “…You noticed?”

  “Well, to me…no, to us, that was the day everything changed, right? It’s not that I noticed or remembered, it’s that I can’t forget—there’s no way can I forget.”

  It was the day he had submitted to fate, the day he had thrown everything away and fled with Rem.

  It was a day when he’d meant to give everything up, but there was one thing only he hadn’t given up on.

  On that day he’d had her love—and the Subaru sitting there existed thanks to that.

  “Subaru, do you…?”

  Rem had consciously stopped calling him by that familiar name since they’d fled to Kararagi. It was no doubt a ritual by which she’d left their old lives behind.

  All that time, Subaru hadn’t asked her to divulge the true intent behind it, nor had Rem told Subaru on her own. As for what led her to depart from the ritual she had continued for so long, that was—

  “…regret it?”

  “Regret?”

  “Yes, that you ran away. That you gave up. That you threw everything away. That you—”

  “If you’re gonna say, picked me, I’m gonna be ultra mad. I’ll grab Rigel and Spica and head back home right now! Ah, nah, I’ll leave Rigel here.”

  He saw that Rigel was giving him a foul look, but Subaru spoke anyway—“Mother and I are having an important discussion”—thrusting his son’s concerns into a bottomless pit. “Now look here,” he said afterward, turning back toward Rem as he spoke. “That’s quite something to ask all of a sudden after eight years, and I’m not sure how many dozens or hundreds of times saying this is gonna help, but…”

  “Yes.”

  “I love you the most in the whole world. You’re the only bride for me, and I’m the only man for you. You’re not a cheap woman…a guy like me doesn’t settle for someone like you.”

  As they gazed at one another, Subaru’s fingertip gave Rem’s forehead a light flick. Then he drew close to the surprised girl’s face and spoke.

  “It’s like I swore that day. I’m yours through and through. I’ll do anything for you. I’ll give anything to you. I live for you alone— Well, nowadays I have to add our kids to that.”

  With Rem’s eyes closed, he crinkled his nose and stole a kiss from her lips.

  A smile came over Subaru just from the touch of their lips and being close enough to feel her breath. No matter how many years passed, that childish mischievousness of his always stayed the same.

  “Can’t you stop worrying now?”

  “…I am sorry. I always worry. I mean, I love you more and more, Subaru. Even though I keep thinking…there can never be a happier time than this…I become happier and happier. I love, I rejoice, and so I worry.”

  Tears appeared in Rem’s eyes. She shook her head a little, even as she professed her own happiness. After shaking her head, she touched her cheek to Subaru’s, allowing their mutual warmth to flow between them as she spoke.

  “I worry that you’ll go away, and I won’t be able to touch you like this anymore.”

  “Relax. I’m not leaving your side and I’m not going away. As long as you love me, I’m never pulling away from you.”

  “My love for you will never run out, Subaru—”

  “We’ll be together forever, then. I love you, Rem.”

  Rem didn’t know what to do with her own feelings as Subaru kissed her again.

  Frozen in surprise, she sank deep inside herself as their hot tongues intertwined once more. When she felt his tongue depart, savoring the sensation of his saliva on her front teeth, her breath was slightly ragged when Subaru continued, “Don’t make me say stupid stuff like maybe I settled for you in the first place. So what then? Instead of love for Rigel and Spica I should pity them? Spica’s the crystallization of our love all according to plan, and Rigel’s the kid born from our youth and burning love running wild.”

  “…It was quite a time when Rigel was born.”

  When Subaru put a hand on his hip and lectured her, Rem smiled softly as she looked back at him, reminiscing.

  “Even though we needed to find a house and a job here in Kararagi and set up a calm, stable life…”

  “Well, um, hey, we were young, so we couldn’t just hold off.”

  “And even though you were tired from work, you became very energetic in the evening, Subaru.”

  “Er, um, hey, when you’re young you have energy to spare, right?”

  “I got pregnant almost at the same time as getting full-time work, so my head was pretty much a haze at the time…”

  “A man really doesn’t like acknowledging the so-called mistakes of his youth…”

  Subaru deeply felt Rem’s vigorous counterattack as he gazed into the distance and murmured. On the other end, Rigel grimaced at being treated like Subaru’s mistake, but he apparently read the mood and refrained from intruding. Not bad for a son of his.

  “Well, um, I was happy, too. When you told me, at first I had just a little bit of blood dripping from my nose, and then when I tried to check if it was a dream or not, it was actually bleeding from after you slugged me…”

  Rem had lost her temper a fair bit, too, so the haymaker punch he’d received had sent him crashing into the wall with enough force to make their temporary residence tilt. It had been bad enough he had resigned himself to possibly experiencing Return by Death once again after a long hiatus.

  At any rate, Subaru was able to recall every detail of when Rem had informed him of her pregnancy, including the warm feelings welling up in his chest at the time…

  However, Rem responded to Subaru’s words with a shake of her head.

  “You are mistaken. My happiness is likely a different happiness from yours. What I think of happiness is…happiness that I did not have to lose you, Subaru.”

  “—”

  “Rigel is the tangible bond born between Subaru and Rem. It may be a poor way to say it, but a child born between us firmly tied you to me so that you would never leave my side… That made me happy.”

  Perhaps he’d been leaning on her ever since those days of uncertainty.

  He’d thrown away anything and everything until that point, the two of them fleeing to a new land with nothing but each other. Back in those days, with nothing to cling to but each other, Rem had always been shaken by the irrational fear that she would someday lose Subaru again.

  In Rem’s lack of confidence in herself, Subaru had met his match.

  To Rem, worth much more than her minimal appraisal of herself, her life with Subaru was one of maximal happiness and anxiety, nurturing both fortune and fear as two sides of the same coin.

  And it was the new life between them that had served as the marker to put an end to that time.

  “You didn’t believe?”

  “No. I believe you more than this entire world, Subaru.”

  “Not that. I don’t mean believing me…I mean, you didn’t believe in yourself?”

  Subaru’s words drew a small gasp from Rem; then she nodded toward him. Inside her, Subaru loomed disproportionately large. Rem, thinking she was very tiny in comparison, must have felt anxious on account of that.

  Enough not to notice that Subaru had harbored the same worry all that time.

  Subaru couldn’t help a pained smile at how they were intensely self-deprecating, husband and wife both. The sight of that made Rem’s cheeks puff up.

  “It is fine. I am an idiot. You cannot be faulted for
laughing…,” she said.

  “No, no. I was just thinking all over again that our personalities are a perfect match, that and yes, my wife really is the cutest in the whole world.”

  For but a single moment, the surprise confession made Rem blink and brought a flush to her cheeks. Subaru’s breast warmed at the response; he had managed to make Rem truly feel his love for her.

  He liked, and loved, Rem most in the whole world. He was capable of yelling that in a loud voice. In fact, from time to time, he did just that. It had made them locally famous as a particularly passionate husband and wife.

  “—Rigel, Spica.”

  “Mm?”

  All of a sudden, Rem spoke the names of their two adorable children. When Subaru cocked his head, Rem said, “It’s nothing,” gazing at Subaru with upturned eyes.

  “Both are the names of stars, yes? Stars in your homeland, Subaru?”

  “Yep. My dad had a fundamentally lousy personality, but I straight-up admire him for naming me Subaru. I like this name. Subaru’s the name of a star, y’see.”

  When, during his elementary school years, he brought up the topic of the origin of his name, Subaru had learned that he was named for a star cluster in the nighttime sky. Subaru had held an interest in illustrated books about stars ever since. So he knew a whole bunch of star names, and when he needed to stick a name onto something—

  “I was always taking names from stars. I used the name of a star for my handle on the net, and if I used an alias I’d usually take one from a star. So even in that sense, these names really shine!!”

  “I am uncertain what you mean by that, but I do think names of stars are wonderful. If a third child is born, I am sure it shall be the same.”

  “Isn’t it a little soon to talk about a third? Spica’s not weaned yet.”

  “I was thinking I could leave everything but breastfeeding to Rigel. Why do you think I was so careful not to have the next child until he got bigger?”

  “Hard to notice with me around, but you’re pretty hard on Rigel, too, aren’t you, Rem?!”

  Subaru made a strained smile at Rem’s routine treatment of their son as he got up from the bench, brushing his rear. Then, as Rem looked up at him, he extended a hand toward her.