Make Me: Twelve Tales of Dark Desire

by Aleatha Romig

When she realized the time, an immediate rush of panic nearly knocked her off her feet. It was 4:30 PM and she was supposed to be back at their suite by 5:00 PM. Her minute recollection of Spanish did little to help her navigate the Italian street signs. She’d walked to the museum, stopping at others on the way. The sidewalk cafés and narrow streets all looked the same. Normally, she had an uncanny sense of direction, but seeing the minutes tick away on her watch made her lose any navigational skills she’d previously possessed. She practically ran the streets filled with people, trying desperately to find her way back to their hotel. At 5:30 PM she reached the Relais Santa Croce. Entering the exquisite lobby, she did her best to regain her composure.

  With only twenty-four rooms, the staff excelled at name recognition and attention. The concierge immediately greeted her in broken English, “Good evening, Signora Rawlings, your husband—he awaits you in your suite. May I carry your baggage?”

  Claire’s heart sank. She knew Tony’s meetings were nearby. Now her fears were realized. At first, she told the concierge no, thank you. Then she decided perhaps having someone enter the suite with her was a good idea. She handed him the few bags she carried and they proceeded to the Rawlings suite. The concierge assisted her by using her key to unlock their door. The double doors opened to the sitting area, complete with fireplace and windows overlooking the historic center of Florence. Tony wasn’t there.

  The concierge placed Mrs. Rawlings’s bags on the sofa and thanked her. She reached into her purse for a tip when Tony appeared from the bedroom. He smiled gallantly at the concierge, thanked him, and handed him a generous tip from his money clip.

  Thanking Signor Rawlings, the concierge bowed and left.

  Claire’s heart began to pound in her ears as she and Tony stood silently for what seemed like an eternity. She’d used all her resolve maintaining her facade with the concierge. She hadn’t witnessed the other Tony in quite a while. She worked diligently day and night to keep him away. But now she was late, she broke his punctuality rule, and there was no need to explain. She knew her reasons wouldn’t matter. So she stood, tall and resolute. Her eyes weren’t full of fury, they brimmed with tears. He just watched and said nothing. The pupils of his eyes were taking over, yet his expression wasn’t keeping up. Claire waited.

  *

  Tony watched her. He’d been worried. What if something happened to her? He didn’t even know where to begin to look. When he heard her arrive his immediate feeling was relief, she was okay, but then he saw her, knew she was safe, and relief faded into displeasure. It wasn’t conscious, but he felt it happening, and he didn’t want to give in to it. Her expression looked so frightened, yet she stood so strong and proud.

  There was a time he would have enjoyed quelling her resolve; but right now, all he wanted to do was make her feel safe. Finally, without speaking Tony indicated they sit on the sofa. Claire sat and waited. He broke the silence. “Tell me what you saw today and what caused your delay.” He didn’t yell or strike. Claire’s obvious relief led to a sudden loss of control. Tony reached for her and she started to involuntarily tremble. “Claire, it’s all right.” His tone comforted her as he pulled her close.

  “Tony, I’m so sorry. I was at the Galleria dell’ Accademia—which was amazing—when I realized the time. I immediately left the museum, but I couldn’t understand the signs and the streets all look the same.” Her words ran together with small sobs between. “I knew the hotel was within walking distance—but I suddenly couldn’t remember the direction.”

  At first, he didn’t speak, only holding her. Then he said, “It’s a foreign city, mistakes happen. I was worried something happened to you. I didn’t want you to have an accident.” His voice was tender, yet his words…

  Their discussion continued to the bedroom. She finally regained her composure. He tried his best to show her she was safe and loved. She showed him her relief at his reaction. Later after they’d soaked in the large marble tub, they dressed for a romantic dinner and walked through the streets of Florence. Although the streets were packed with people, as they walked arm in arm it felt like their private journey. The romantic city, beautiful structures and tepid night breeze combined to enhance the evening.

  *

  It wasn’t long until they arrived at their next destination, Rome. Tony had meetings scheduled for one of their two days. They stayed at Rome Cavalieri-Waldorf Astoria, in a luxurious suite with a magnificent view of the city highlighted by the dome of Saint Peter’s Basilica.

  Claire was relieved to learn her tardiness in Florence didn’t cause the loss of her roaming pass. Although Tony continued to allow her to sightsee alone, he reminded her multiple times to keep track of time. She spent the day walking and busing around the city while Tony attended to business. The ancient history that accompanied everything in Rome fascinated Claire.

  She visited the Coliseum, the Forum, and the Pantheon. She enjoyed a latte in Piazza Navona and watched as couples threw coins into the Trevi Fountain. The sights were breathtaking and remarkable, but the entrenched fear she felt in Florence affected her. She enjoyed everything, but now it felt tarnished. She didn’t want to feel that way, but sometimes memories and emotions would overcome her. Not wanting Tony to see the change, she dutifully put on her mask and performed to the best of her ability. The sights were still amazing and spectacular.

  The next day, at Vatican City, they walked hand in hand through the atrium of Saint Peter’s Basilica. They viewed the Vatican grottoes, Saint Peter’s Treasury, Saint Peter’s Square, and the Vatican gardens. As they walked the steep road back to their hotel, Tony confessed, “With all of my traveling, I rarely sightsee. Today, when you said you wanted to spend the entire day at the Vatican, I thought you were crazy. I expected to be done in an hour or two”—Claire watched as he spoke—“But it was incredible. I just want you to know I understand how you lost track of time in Florence. I get it.”

  She didn’t speak; she squeezed his hand. Something from her past came to mind and she smiled. He once said she was trainable, perhaps he was too. It just took longer with him.

  The last country on their journey was Switzerland. Tony had meetings, first in Interlaken and then in Genève. They spent one night in Interlaken. The Swiss Alps were the epitome of pure unsullied nature and grandeur. The small town of Interlaken was surrounded by crystal-clear lakes, sparkling streams, and waterfalls. And ever present were the Monch and Jungfrau mountain range of the Swiss Alps. Claire felt like she was in the middle of a postcard.

  While Tony met with investors, Claire chose to relish the relaxing scenery and take in the atmosphere. She wandered the streets, enjoyed the cafés, and rested in the beauty of the tranquil landscape. Their two weeks were action packed. She could have spent her time any way she chose, the options were numerous; however, she enjoyed some downtime to reflect on all they’d seen and to relax in the natural splendor.

  Her memories overflowed with sights and sounds of ancient cities. She could close her eyes and recall the amazing art and architecture. Inhaling the sweet Swiss chocolate as she sipped her coffee and nibbled on the candy bar, she remembered the amazing cuisine and delicious wines. She thought about her husband. He’d spent the entire two weeks open and understanding. She never anticipated the freedoms she’d been granted. Her stack of books remained unread. Even when she was late, his voice and expression were more of care and concern than of anger. Her thoughts moved from his voice and expression, to his strong, safe embrace. They’d made love at every stop.

  She recalled the yacht with the rhythmic rocking from the sea. Smiling, she thought lustfully about wanting him—how on many occasions it was her who initiated their carnal encounters and he who responded appropriately. Claire slowly realized he was doing what she’d asked—filling her with good memories. She finished her chocolate and smiled contentedly.

  Early Saturday morning they boarded a train to Genève. Tony had one more meeting. It was his last obligation of their trip. After it conclud
ed, they’d spend the last night in Genève and fly home in the morning. Claire couldn’t believe how quickly the fourteen days had passed. She felt completely exhausted and yet exhilarated. The first time she remembered Tony traveling to Europe he’d stayed for eight days. Claire remembered when he arrived home he had said he was tired. She understood. Being absent from Iowa for over two weeks, she was ready to get home. Their destinations were spectacular; however, Claire longed for the serenity of her own bed and suite.

  Before they went out for their final night in Europe, Tony insisted they take some time to visit famous boutiques and shops on Rue du Rhône. Claire repeatedly told him she needed nothing. As if unable to hear or comprehend, he led her to an exclusive jewelry store. He wanted her to have something to remember their time, so he purchased a sparkling diamond watch. She wondered about a possible double meaning.

  After a nine-hour flight, they arrived home. She couldn’t remember being more tired. Their flight from Fiji was longer, yet they predominately rested in Fiji or at least spent time horizontal. She felt like she had been literally sightseeing, walking, and hiking for the past seventeen days. Their dinner in New York seemed forever ago—still she knew it was not.

  Before they went to bed, Tony brought Claire a large stack of e-mails from his home office; she chose to not look at them. She’d do it tomorrow. They both collapsed into her bed. She thanked Tony repeatedly for the trip of a lifetime and the wonderful memories. She drifted into a dreamless sleep with her head resting on his shoulder, listening to his breathing.

  Though exhausted, his arm embraced the soft warm body that nestled against his side. Her steady breathing told him she was sleeping. Closing his eyes he could hear her voice thanking him for the memories. Inhaling the scent of her hair he recalled their unforgettable trip and marveled at the intense satisfaction blooming within his chest.

  Before he drifted off to sleep, Tony whispered, “I plan to go into the office tomorrow.”

  Stirring only slightly, Claire murmured, “All right, I’ll see you tomorrow evening. I plan to sleep through your alarm.” He smiled at her honesty as they both floated into blissful slumber.

  It’s not a question of enough, pal. It’s a Zero Sum game, somebody wins, somebody loses. Money itself isn’t lost or made, it’s simply transferred from one perception to another. Like magic.

  —Gordon Gekko

  Chapter Forty-One

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  Anton stood silently outside the grand doors of his grandfather’s home office. Even though the double doors were tightly closed, he could hear the voices from the other side. His father insisted Anton be excluded from the conversation within. As far as Anton was concerned, that was ridiculous. Something big was happening, and it had to do with his name and the company he’d been told would be his. Samuel could shelter him from the discussion and knowledge of the business dealings, but Anton wasn’t ignorant. He could read a NYSE ticker. Rawls Corp. stock had plummeted from 79.8 to 56.4 at the close of trading. The news release proclaimed rumors of wrongdoings within the corporation. The four men within the office weren’t drinking beer and playing cards; this was deadly serious. It felt like everything was crashing down around them. Someone opened a dam and the water couldn’t be stopped.

  Inside the cherry-paneled, regal office, Nathaniel questioned Clawson, “You said no one would ever know. What the hell happened? Where did these allegations come from?”

  “Mr. Rawls, I don’t know. We’ve covered our tracks for almost ten years. You’ve made a bloody fortune. Maybe the feds got nervous because you were making too much profit.”

  “What the hell is that, too much profit?” Nathaniel couldn’t sit. He paced every inch of the plush carpet. “Have they investigated Trump or Gates? I’m nowhere close to those men.”

  “It doesn’t matter who else has been investigated.” Samuel tried to bring the men back to the task at hand. “What matters is that we get our ducks in a row and meet the investigation head-on.”

  Clawson gazed over to his assistant, Cole Mathews. Mathews was busy organizing stacks of paper and utilizing a shredder to reduce the paper overload. Clawson addressed both Rawls men. “Cole and I are making sure there is no evidence linking Rawls to any of the allegations.”

  “You said no one would know. Why is Mathews shredding papers? There shouldn’t be anything that needs to be shredded.” Nathaniel watched as Mathew’s green eyes briefly met his. He seemed to be working as fast as the shredder would allow.

  Samuel spoke above the grind of the shredder, “Instead of shredding, we need to be open to the investigation. Be honest, take our fines and penalties and move on.” He might as well have been talking to the walls. His father and Clawson were devising a strategy as Mathews shredded without pause.

  Cole Mathews entered their inner circle about two years ago. He didn’t talk much, but was a whiz at research. Tell him a stock or a company, and bingo, he would have more insider information than one would believe humanly possible. Suddenly, Nathaniel regretted not having Clawson and Mathews sign some kind of power of attorney or non-disclosure statement, a way to distance him from them.

  These two men helped make him mega-wealthy. At this moment, if possible he would hang them both out to dry to save himself and his family. Hell, Samuel wouldn’t even meet his eyes.

  Briefly, Nathaniel thought about the recent news. The space shuttle “Challenger” had blown up during takeoff. That was a damn shame. Just maybe that news would overshadow the unfortunate false allegations regarding Rawls Corp.

  The sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes.

  —Thomas Hardy

  Chapter Forty-Two

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  On the day following their return, Claire woke late, relishing the large empty bed. After Cindy brought her coffee and food, she sat on her balcony, ate breakfast, and enjoyed the summer day, truly contented to be home. August in Iowa reminded her of Indiana, and even though the temperature and humidity continued to increase, the summer’s climax was rapidly approaching. Before long, the balminess would diminish and evidence of autumn would materialize.

  Claire intended to appreciate the remaining days of summer. She took the folder of e-mails to the pool. Knowing that Tony read them before delivering them, she decided to separate the ones she felt needed responses and expedite her evening request session. Eighteen days’ worth of e-mails took quite a bit of time. She started by removing the ones she didn’t intend to answer. Next, she reread the ones from acquaintances. What did they want? Could she help in any way? If not, they went into the Patricia, please respond pile. If she believed there was something she could do, she put them in a pile to discuss with Tony.

  Next, was the pile of friends and family. It was considerably smaller. Most of them knew she and Tony were out of the country. Most of her friends wanted to know about the trip and schedule get-togethers. Courtney wanted to do lunch as soon as Claire recovered from her traveling. MaryAnn’s e-mail apparently went to both Tony and Claire. She invited them to a movie premiere party at their home in Malibu in October. Claire checked her calendar. It was the weekend after the Red Cross silent auction. She added those to the “discuss with Tony” pile. The last few pages were from Emily. She definitely preferred sitting in the sun, drinking iced tea at her pool, in her bathing suit, and reading Emily’s e-mails to doing it under Tony’s glare.

  The first one was a note about their get-together. Emily and John enjoyed seeing them and thanked them for dinner. Apparently, John spoke to the waiter about paying the bill prior to their arrival, but somehow it never came to the table. This caused Claire to smile; she hadn’t noticed. Emily wished them a good time on their trip. She anxiously waited to hear all about it. The second came a week later. It began with, “I know you are still in Europe, but I wanted to tell you…” The firm set an arbitrary date of November 1. At that time, there would be a review of the associates’ production, hours billed, an
d fees recovered. She was optimistic about John’s final numbers. He spent every waking hour working. But cautiously, she said if he didn’t make the cut, it wasn’t the end. He would still be an associate and considered for partnership during the next review process. She asked Claire to call when she got home. The third e-mail was dated yesterday. It began, “Are you home yet?” She asked multiple questions about their trip and talked about her impending school year. Apparently, the economic state of the country was affecting the finances of her school as well as others everywhere. Even though she worked for a private school system there were severe budget cuts which would affect her classroom directly. It made Claire wonder if she could use some of her capital to make a donation. She decided to put these in the Tony pile. She wanted to call and perhaps pursue the donation.

  Lunch arrived at the pool. Settling into the lounge chair, with a book that made the trip to and from Europe but never opened, Claire was filled with comfort, peace, and contentment. She was home. Jet lag settled in and soon she fell into a deep sleep, sleeping through most of the afternoon. Catherine woke her at 4:00 PM and she went to her suite to prepare for Tony. At 5:00 PM, Catherine informed her that they would dine on the back patio—her life’s routine had resumed.

  August faded into September, and before she knew it October knocked on the door. Claire and Courtney were very busy finalizing their efforts for the silent auction. The donations, facility, caterers, and wine distributors all confirmed; the guest list approved and invitations mailed. Excited about the impending event, Claire felt it was her debut to the philanthropic world. Tony not only participated in this world, he excelled. She wanted Mrs. Anthony Rawlings to be equally synonymous with charity as Mr. Anthony Rawlings. It was the first time Claire informed Tony they would be attending an event. He smiled and told her he would check their calendar.