Deception and Chaos

by S. M. Soto

  “I know, Sophie. I know.”

  Standing, I wipe my hands on my jean clad thighs and open the door, turning back, I glance over my shoulder. Garrett gives me a small smile and a wink that lifts the weight off my chest.

  We’re okay.

  I close the door softly behind me and startle at the sound of the deep, raspy voice beside me.

  “So, you don’t ever plan on letting me go, huh?”

  With a squeak, I whirl around and swat at his bare shoulder.

  “You, jerk! You were eavesdropping? That was supposed to be a private brother and sister moment.”

  Creed shrugs his shoulders. “I wanted to make sure you were going to be okay. If the situation called for it, I planned on removing you from it.”

  I shake my head at him, staring with wide eyes. “You are something else, you know that, right?” I say with a small laugh. His hands slide around my hips and pull my body against his.

  “So I’ve heard.”

  His mouth claims mine and I moan, falling into him like the helpless little sheep that I am.

  “Make love to me, Creed. Please. I need to know that we’re okay.”

  I don’t even have to ask twice. Within seconds Creed is leading me back to his room, our clothes are removed and he’s sliding into me with my back against the bedroom wall. With his body pinned against mine, I forget all about the disaster that happened in the hallway. All I’m able to focus on is Creed and the delicious way he works my body.

  He makes me forget.

  He makes me love.

  He keeps me safe.

  And I fall even more in love with him at the realization.

  MY STOMACH CHURNS VIOLENTLY AS I lay in bed, prompting me to groan in pain, and pull my knees into my chest. Perspiration dots my skin and my brow, as another wave of nausea rocks my body. After all the traumatic events yesterday, all of last night and this morning, I’ve felt sick. I don’t know if it’s stress or maybe something worse.

  God, I hope I’m not contagious.

  All I know is one minute I think I’m going to throw up and die and the next, I’m able to get up and finish a load of my laundry. The bouts of nausea come and go freely with no warning, what so ever. It doesn’t make any sense.

  With a tray of soup and crackers, Creed slips into my room with a worried look on his face.

  “Do you think you’ll be able to keep the soup down?”

  I sit up in bed and get a whiff of chicken broth. My nose wrinkles and my stomach clenches. I shake my head and plop back onto the bed.

  “I think I just need to sleep it off.”

  Creed eyes me warily. He sits on the edge of my bed and runs his hand through my damp hair. His brows dip.

  “I’m going to tell Garrett to stay with you. We don’t leave for a few days, there’s still enough time to find someone else to go in his place.”

  Blowing out a breath, I place my hand on his and halt his movements.

  “I’ll be fine. I promise, I think it’s just the stomach flu or something. Nothing to worry about.”

  He looks doubtful, so I rise up on my elbows and peck him lightly on the lips.

  “I love you,” I say, whispering the words over his lips. I feel his grin beneath my mouth.

  “You win,” he mumbles over my lips before devouring my mouth.

  I wake sometime later in the evening to Garrett who’s checking in on me, much like Creed has been doing the entire day. With my back resting against the headboard I ignore my brother’s worried glances as he scrolls through google for my symptoms.

  “Garrett, seriously? It’s not my appendix or anything serious, it’s just a stomach bug or possibly a cold. I feel fine, honestly.”

  “You’re a horrible liar, Soph.”

  I laugh. “Who says I’m lying? I just don’t have much of an appetite and my stomach is acting funny. No biggie.”

  My brother blows out a haggard sigh and shifts his gaze heavenward.

  “Fine. But you tell me if anything changes, understand?”

  “Yes, sir,” I mock salute him, earning a swift middle finger.

  “I still think I should stay. As much as I hate to admit it, Creed is right, someone should stay here to keep an eye on you.”

  “Garrett,” I groan, “I’ll be fine. I have Mera here if anything should get worse. I promise I’ll let you or Creed know if I need someone else to stay, besides Mera.”

  My brother blows out an agitated breath. “Fine.”

  At dinner, Creed brings me soup and crackers again and this time, surprisingly the smell alone doesn’t make me want to barf. I scarf down the soup and crackers, licking everything clean.

  “That’s a good sign,” Creed says in amusement as he watches me from his position on the bed.

  “I told you,” I say with a grin. With a subtle shake of his head and a rueful grin, Creed climbs into bed with me and tucks me into his warm arms where I fall fast asleep.

  The next morning, I wake up feeling better than I have these past couple of days. I slip out of the secure warmth of Creed’s arms and shower some life back into me before heading down to the kitchen. I find Mera scrambling in the kitchen, trying to prep a full meal for the guys.

  “Good, you’re up early. Mind giving me a hand?”

  “Where do you need me?”

  Mera nods her head toward the package of bacon near the stove. “Can you get started on the bacon?”

  “Of course.”

  I make quick work of the package and lay the slices of bacon onto the skillet. Upon impact, they sizzle and the smell of savory pork fills the kitchen air around us. Normally, my mouth would water at the smell, but for some reason, my stomach churns violently.

  Clutching one hand to my stomach, I use the other to support myself on the counter. A wave of nausea wracks my body. I place a trembling hand over my mouth, hoping, praying, the need to vomit will go away.

  Oh, God.

  I run to the nearest bathroom and lose last night’s dinner inside the toilet bowl. Dry heave after dry heave wracks my body as tears slip out of the corner of my eyes from the force. I guess my stomach bug is back with a vengeance.

  “Still sick, honey?”

  Grabbing a Kleenex, I wipe my mouth before looking up into the worried face of Mera. She rubs my back soothingly as my body is hunched over the toilet in an awkward position.

  “Yeah,” I rasp. “Every time I smell the simplest things, my stomach loses it. This time, it was the bacon. And as you can see, I lost it in the toilet bowl.”

  Pulling myself up to my feet, I reach under the cabinet and grab a brand-new toothbrush. Mera eyes me warily from behind. She gives me a strange look and watches me closely while I brush my teeth. Without a word, Mera ushers me upstairs to my bedroom, and helps me into bed. She makes quick work of tucking me in like a mother would her sick daughter, sending a pang to my heart as I think about my parents. Mera sits beside me in silence, still giving me a strange look.

  “What about breakfast?”

  “That can wait, sweetheart.” Mera nibbles on her bottom lip as her eyes trail over my face and down my body covered in the sheets. Her brows knit together, and I finally lose my patience.

  “What?” I finally ask.

  “I think I know what’s happening here.”

  “You do?” I raise an inquisitive brow.

  Mera smiles, placing a gentle hand on my shoulder, “When was your last…period?”

  I open my mouth to respond, but like a tidal wave, the realization slams into me. My heartbeat elevates as I mentally try to configure the math.

  Sex with Creed without any protection. No period. Sex without protection. No contraceptive. Sex without protection…no freaking period.

  How could we be so careless?

  My body sways on the bed from all the blood rushing to my head. I feel light-headed, and another wave of nausea rolls over me, twisting my stomach. The walls of my bedroom start to close in on me.

  “Oh, God…”


  “It’s okay, honey. Everything will be okay Sophia, just breathe,” Mera coos in my ear, prompting me to inhale much needed air into my lungs. “Is it safe to presume its Creed’s?”

  I look up at her through misty eyes and nod my head in agreement just as my bottom lip trembles.

  “H-how am I going to tell him, Mera? And Garrett? Oh, God.” I drop my face into my hands thinking about the shit storm that’ll surely come once Garrett finds out.

  “Sophia, please look at me.”

  The tone of her voice prompts me to look up. I sniffle, hastily blinking past the moisture in my eyes.

  “Good. Now I want you to dry those tears and listen to me. Can you do that?”

  Wiping the tears on the sleeve of my shirt, I nod my head and try to focus on Mera without letting my mind wander to my new discovery.

  “There’s a very good possibility you are carrying a life inside of you, Sophia. That means you need to be strong, not only for yourself, but for this baby. Creed loves you. I’ve been around the man for years and I’ve never seen him look at something, or someone, with such adoration and with such a visceral need to protect, but that’s exactly how he looks at you. And as for your brother, you know that man will do anything for you, so long as it makes you happy. He loves you with his whole heart, sweetie. He almost lost you once, and I know for certain he won’t ever do it again. So, don’t you worry about what either of them say, or how either of them will react—just worry about that little baby growing inside of you.”

  Tears trail down my face as I nod my head in understanding. Mera must sense my impending breakdown, because she pulls me into her arms and holds me while I sob onto her shoulder. I cry just thinking about the two most important men in my life and their reactions to my news. But most of all, I cry thinking about the beautiful child Creed and I created in the throes of passion. Of its own accord, my hand protectively wraps around my flat stomach. I know without a shadow of a doubt, I’d do anything to protect this innocent little life inside of me. The life that is a significant piece of both Creed and me.

  I’d give my life for my unborn child—that I’m sure of.

  Gently, I pull out of Mera’s arms and stare up at her, wishing I could share this moment with my mother. But I’m grateful I have Mera here to help guide me because I have no clue what comes next.

  “What do I do now? Should I take a test? Or do I need to see a doctor?”

  “First things first, you need to tell Creed there’s a possibility you are pregnant. Then, I suggest making an appointment with an OB.”

  “What if…what if he doesn’t want this baby?” I whisper. The horror of that possibility has ice crawling up my spine, a wake of shivers following in its path.

  I gasp, my eyes widening when another horrible thought slams into me. “What if my child is in danger? What if they come back for me?” My hand settles over my stomach, trembling in fear.

  “Sophia, have a little faith. There’s really only one way to find out. And please, don’t stress yourself out, if you are pregnant, I’m positive Creed and your brother will do whatever is necessary to keep you both safe.”

  I don’t waste another second. I fly out of bed and hurry down the hall into Creed’s room, slamming the door behind me. My back rests against the heavy wood as I try to catch my breath and gather my thoughts.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Creed’s voice startles me, prompting me to jolt away from the door and place my hand over my rapidly beating heart.

  “Jesus, you scared me,” I breathe. He stares at me with worry etched on his features. With his back resting against his headboard, he closes the black folder that was resting on his lap and gives me his undivided attention.

  I blow out a deep breath trying to calm myself before I tell him the news. The big news. The one that can change everything. My heartbeat speeds up at the thought.

  “Nothing’s wrong,” I say breathlessly, shaking my head. “I just wanted to see you. Talk to you.”

  His brows dip into a frown and he stares at me for a beat, no doubt searching for the lie written across my face.

  “Is this about me leaving on the assignment?”

  “No. I know you and Garrett have to go, I don’t like it, but there’s nothing I can do.”

  His shoulders sag in what looks like relief. Rising off the bed, he closes the distance between us and cups my face in his large hand.

  “Everything will be fine. Now, tell me what’s really bothering you.”

  He slides his arms around my waist pulling me flush against him. Just as I’m about to open my mouth and tell him there’s a possibility he’ll be a father, there’s a loud knock at the door before its wrenched opened and Garrett pokes his head inside. His brows pull down and his lips thin into a grim line when he gets a good look at us. I internally roll my eyes at his dramatics.

  “We’re needed in the tower for a thorough debriefing.”

  Creed looks down at me with a frown on his face, looking torn. I rub my hand up his back and place a chaste kiss on his lips.

  “Go, we’ll talk when you get back,” I say, forcing a smile.

  He dips his head down, kissing me senseless before leaving the room.

  I mindlessly walk down the halls, trying to think of a good way to tell Creed he’s going to be a father. I run through different things to say, not liking any of them in the least.

  Hi, babe. I know we haven’t talked about the future much but hey, I might have a bun in the oven.

  Look Creed, I know you’re a hitman and all, but I hope you can put aside your mafia roots for the birth of our child.

  A groan tears from my throat the more I think about it. Just be simple. Straight to the point. He’ll understand, I remind myself.

  “Stop thinking so hard, love. You’re frying your brain.” A smile graces my lips as I turn around, finding Finlay leaning against the library door. “What’s got you so serious?”

  I shake my head and shrug my shoulders. “Just worried about tomorrow, I guess.”

  “Ahhh,” Finlay smiles, “Don’t be love, we do this all the time. Easy pickings.”

  I roll my eyes. “That’s not exactly the phrase I’d use to describe your guys’ job.”

  “I know, but we know what needs to be done, and we always make it out alive, love. Have some faith.”

  That’s the second time in one day I’ve been told to have some faith.

  I blow out a sigh. “I know, you’re totally right.”

  I sit down and lean back on the couch and rest my head on the cushion.

  “You still look worried.”

  I peek open one eye and groan. “I know. I just have a lot on my mind is all.”

  “Inquiring minds would love to know,” he says plopping down haphazardly in the seat next to me, making me laugh.

  “I can’t tell you…or at the very least, not yet.”

  His brows furrow. “Trouble in paradise already?”

  I jab him in the arm with my elbow and roll my eyes. “No, things are great with us actually.”

  Finlay suddenly jumps to his feet and holds a finger in front of him. “One moment, I have an idea.”

  He comes barreling back into the room with two bottles of beer and a bag of chips. I arch a brow.

  “Brew and sodium always help me open up. Get it off your chest love, it’ll make you feel better.” He thrusts the beer out to me and I gently push it back toward him.

  “I can’t.”

  “Oh, come on, love. Of course you can.”

  “No, Finlay, I really, really, can’t.”

  He seems to catch onto my double entendre because his eyes widen as big as saucers and his mouth drops open. I have to hold in my laugh as I watch him struggle to compose himself.

  “Bloody hell, Sophia. Does Creed know? Your brother?”

  I shake my head and worry my bottom lip between my teeth.

  “I was just about to tell Creed, but he had to attend a debriefing meeting, so our conversation w
as cut short. Why aren’t you there, by the way?”

  “Wasn’t invited,” he says with a careless shrug. “But you shouldn’t tell him right now. Ghastly timing. The day before he goes on assignment? He’ll never be able to focus. He can get distracted or worse, killed. You need to think clearly, love.”

  I drop my head into my hands and shake it back and forth.

  “God, I’m so scared he won’t come back.”

  “He will, love. We always do.”

  “Promise me something, Finlay. Promise me you’ll make sure he makes it home safe. Please.”

  “You have my word, Soph. I’ll see to it.”

  My talk with Finlay doesn’t ease any of my worry over the fact Creed will be leaving soon. I’m still torn. I want to tell Creed, but I don’t want him distracted while he’s gone. I need him home in one piece. If anything, my conversation with Finlay makes me feel guilty. I can’t believe he knows before the father of my own child does.

  What the hell was I thinking opening my mouth to him?

  I wait up for Creed as long as I can but from experience, I know how long these things can take. Pulling on one of his shirts, I climb into his bed where I wait in silence with my loud tumultuous thoughts.

  By the time Creed is done debriefing, it’s already time for him to leave. Snuggled in his bed hugging his pillow to my body, I feel him enter the room before I see him.

  “Shit.” I hear him curse, then sigh. He doesn’t turn on the light, instead his footsteps get closer until the edge of the bed dips. His hand traces my shoulder in soft tantalizing circles that has my body leaning into his touch.

  “I have to leave now.”

  His words make my body tense. I turn onto my back, and let my eyes adjust to the darkness of the room. With Creed in clear view now, I reach up and caress his face.

  “I’m scared, Creed. There’s so many things I wanted to talk about, I just…”

  “You can tell me when I get back.” I hear the steel in his voice—he’s trying to make his point that he will be coming home to me.

  God, I hope so.

  “I love you, Creed.” My eyes burn with unshed tears as I wait for him to say it back to me. He hasn’t said it yet, but I feel it. In the way he touches me, the way he looks at me, and the way he makes love to me. I feel his need for me, it surpasses my own need.