Jacob's Ladder: Gabe

by Katie Ashley

  Then I would walk away.

  Sure, I could prolong the inevitable by telling her I’d come back just as soon as the meeting with the execs was over. We could have several more weeks together before I had to leave again to record the album and I might finally get to bury myself deep inside her tight walls, but that was where it would end. I led a vagabond life on the road while Rae’s roots were firmly bound to her small-town existence. I could never ask her to leave her responsibilities there, and I certainly couldn’t leave the band.

  With an agonized groan, I finally pulled myself up out of bed. After making quick work of packing up, I took a quick shower. Once I was dressed, I grabbed my bags and headed down the stairs. I made as quick of a getaway as I could with Rejune before hustling out to the Jeep. As I drove across town, dread washed over me. It was at a moment like this that I wished there was a liquor store in town. I could have used a hit of vodka to help get me through.

  As I pulled into Rae’s driveway, I was glad to see her car was still at home and I hadn’t missed her. It would have been even worse if she had already left to take Linc to school and I had to hunt her down at the restaurant. There was no way in hell I wanted to do this in public. Glancing at the clock on the dashboard, I imagined she was just chugging down her second cup of espresso while she made sure Linc’s lunch was packed into his backpack. Holy shit. I’d only been hanging out with Rae a little over a week and I was already in tune with the rhythm of her mornings. Man, that was intense.

  After bounding up the front porch steps, I froze. Suddenly, AJ’s words echoed through my mind: I know she’s someone worth pursuing—someone like my Mia. Four years of being around AJ’s wife had shown me that she was strong, fiercely protective, and extremely loyal to those she loved. She was also funny and had a heart of gold, especially when she would make extra food for me and Eli to eat while on the tour bus.

  Strangely enough, everything I had just thought about Mia could be said about Rae. I know she’s someone worth pursuing. Fuck, AJ had nailed it. Rae was someone worth pursuing, someone worth keeping. Was I really going to be an epic dumbass and walk away from the best thing that had happened to me in years? Sure, we had some obstacles in our path, but they weren’t completely insurmountable. Wasn’t it worth it to give it a try? Since I’d only experienced a handful of romantic relationships in my adult life, I really wasn’t capable of answering that question. When it came down to it, I was just going to have to rely on the adage that there was a first time for everything.

  With a renewed determination in my step, I reached out and rang the doorbell. After Rae peeked through the side curtain and saw it was me, her face lit up. She threw open the door and gave me a beaming smile. “Hey.”

  “Hey,” I replied.

  “What are you doing here? I thought we were going to meet for breakfast before I went to work.”

  “I’m going to have to get a rain check for breakfast.”

  Rae’s smile slowly started to fade. “You are?”

  I nodded. “My label called. They’re asking to hear the songs I’ve been working on while one of the execs is in town, so I have to be back in Atlanta by noon.”

  “Oh,” she murmured.

  “I knew I had to come say goodbye in person, rather than just calling you.”

  “Goodbyes are pretty shitty no matter how you get them.”

  “True, but I also wanted to be able to thank you in person. I’d still be drowning in writer’s block if it hadn’t been for you. Hell, I wouldn’t even be able to meet with the label today because I wouldn’t have any songs to show them.”

  “I’m not sure you owe me any gratitude. I really didn’t do anything but hang out with you.”

  I stared intently at her. “Yes, you did, more than you’ll ever imagine.”

  With a smile that didn’t reach her eyes, Rae said, “I’m glad I could help. For what it’s worth, I enjoyed spending time with you this week.”

  “I enjoyed spending time with you, too.” I took a step closer to her. “Listen, Rae, I—”

  Linc popped out from behind his mother. “Hey Gabe, what’s up?”

  “Bad news.”

  “Whadya mean?”

  “I gotta head back to the city sooner than I thought.”

  His expression instantly soured. “So you’ve come to say goodbye.”

  My gaze bounced from his to Rae’s. “Just for now, not forever.”

  While a surprised look flashed in her eyes, I motioned to Linc with my hand. “Come out here with me for a minute.”

  Linc instantly obliged. When I glanced back at Rae, her face had filled with confusion. I knew she was wondering what in the hell it was I wanted to talk to Linc about. I walked him down the length of the porch to where we were out of earshot from Rae. In a low voice, I said, “Don’t think for a minute that I’ve forgotten our deal.”

  His brows shot up. “You haven’t?”

  “Of course not. Did you think I was just going to run out on you?”

  He shrugged. “Maybe.”

  An ache of sadness burned its way through my chest at both Linc’s response and his expression. I reached out and touched his arm. “Hell no. Just as soon as I’m done with the label, I’ll grab the guitar I owe you and come back.”

  “You will?”

  “Damn straight.”

  He grinned. “Then I’ll be waiting.”

  “You do that.” Glancing back at Rae, I said, “Could you do me a favor and let me have some alone time with your mom?”

  “You got it.” He then hurried back down the porch and ducked inside the house.

  “What was all that about?” Rae asked when I joined her again.

  “Just a little man talk.”

  “I didn’t know you and Linc had man talk,” she said with a small smile.

  “Yep, we do.” Reaching out for her arm, I drew her out of the doorway. “I wasn’t finished talking to you when Linc interrupted us.”

  “You already said goodbye—what else is there left to say?

  “A lot.” After steering her over to the swing, I eased her down onto the seat. “This morning when I got the call to go back to Atlanta, all I could think of was all the obstacles between us. I haven’t really dated anyone in a long time, and it’s been even longer since I tried to make things work with a woman. That said, I’d like to try with you.”

  Rae’s eyes bulged at my declaration. “You would?”

  I nodded. “I know your life is here with Linc, and my life is all over the place, but I still want to see where this could go.”

  “I don’t know, Gabe. You’re right about anything between us being complicated.”

  “When it comes down to it, when is life not complicated?”

  As she nibbled on her bottom lip, I desperately wanted to kiss her. I wanted to take her upstairs and fuck her to make her truly mine, but I knew that wasn’t likely to happen with the house full of her kid and her sisters. Finally, she exhaled a breath. “I-I don’t know. The stakes seem kind of high.”

  “Come on, Rae. Don’t be a chicken shit.”

  Her expression darkened as she jabbed a finger at me. “Don’t you think I want to say yes? For once in my adult life throw caution to the wind and dive into the unknown? But I can’t.”

  “Why the hell not?”

  “Because I’m a mother. I always have to think about what is best for Lincoln before I think of myself.”

  “Look, I know I’m not a kid person, but I’m pretty sure Linc likes me.”

  “That’s part of the problem. Linc’s never reacted to any of the men I’ve dated like he has with you. If things don’t work out between us, it won’t just be me with a broken heart.”

  Rae’s declaration left me somewhat speechless. For the first time in my life, I found myself wanting a woman with family obstacles. Before, the only issues I faced were getting them out of their clothes and finding a somewhat secluded place to screw backstage. Rae’s and my challenges were monumentally more d
ifficult to work through.

  Linc’s face flashed before my eyes as Rae’s words about leaving him brokenhearted played in my mind. Since the day I’d met him at Hart and Daughter, the kid had certainly grown on me. Even AJ could tell that from over the phone.

  “The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt Linc. I wish I could promise you it won’t happen, but I can’t. All I can promise is that I will do everything within my power not to hurt him.”

  Tears shimmered in Rae’s eyes. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

  “Yes, I do. Just as I wouldn’t do anything to hurt him, the same goes for you as well.

  “I want to believe that…more than anything.”

  And I want you to believe in me, Rae. “All we can do is give it a chance. None of us knows what tomorrow will bring.” Tilting my head at her, I asked, “In the future, would you want to look back and wonder what could have happened between us?”

  “No, I wouldn’t,” she murmured.

  “Then will you give us a chance?”

  After a few agonizing seconds of silence, Rae finally smiled at me. “Yes, I will.”

  It took a few moments for me to breathe, let alone find my voice. “Hell yeah!” Drawing her into my arms, I brought my lips to hers. They felt just as amazing as they had the first night I kissed her in the kitchen—soft, sweet, and supple.

  Just as we started to get a little carried away, a shrill whistle came from the sidewalk. “Get ya some, Rae!” a voice called.

  Immediately, we jerked apart. Craning my neck, I said, “Who the hell was that jackass who just interrupted us?”

  Rae giggled. “Martin Pauley from the hardware store.”

  “Remind me to go by there and knock him in the head with one of his shovels when I get back in town.”

  “I’ll try to do that.” After smoothing down her shirt, she said, “It’s probably best. You need to get on the road, don’t you?”

  I grimaced. “Yeah, I do.”

  “Now that we’re trying us, when will I see you again?” A hopeful gleam shone in her eyes. “Will you come back this weekend?”

  A few hours without Rae’s presence seemed too long, let alone a day, and that was how I knew I wanted this with her. I wanted a chance at something more. Suddenly, an idea struck me. “Come to Atlanta with me.”

  Rae appeared flustered at my request. “Wait, what?”

  “You heard me.”

  “Yes, I’m aware of what you said. I’m just trying to process it.”

  “There’s nothing to process. Throw a few things in a bag and come to Atlanta.”

  Rolling her eyes, Rae said, “Nothing to process? What kind of fantasy world are you living in? How about my kid and my job, for starters?”

  “Let Linc stay with your dad, and you can take a mental health day from work.” I gave her my best How could you resist this face? smile, hoping it might work on her.

  “Pawn my kid off on my dad and play hooky from work?” Guess not. But, the more I thought about leaving her and not knowing when I’d be back, it just felt wrong.

  “Yes, although I wouldn’t exactly use those specific terms.”

  She swept one of her hands to her hips. “How about the fact that I’ve barely known you ten days and I’m going off with you for the weekend? You sure aren’t one for moving slow, are you?”

  “I think we sped past slow the night I went down on you on your kitchen counter.”

  Rae’s cheeks flushed. “I suppose we did.”

  Placing my hands on her hips, I drew Rae closer to me. “I want more time with you.” I slid my hands down over her ass. “I want more of you.”

  She sucked in a breath before pressing herself against me. “I want more time with you, too.”

  “Then please consider my request, Rae. Come to Atlanta with me. I know it’s fast. I know it’s not easy with the responsibilities you have on your shoulders, but I’d like to see us be an us. After I get done at the recording studio, we’ll have the whole weekend together, just the two of us.”

  Tilting her head, she peered up at me with consternation. “Can you put on the brakes for just a minute to give me the chance to call my dad? As much as I want to run off for a carefree weekend with you, I have to make sure Linc is taken care of. I’m first and foremost a mom, remember?”

  “Yes, I remember. You go ahead and call your dad, and I’ll text Eli that I’m on my way.”

  I couldn’t help feeling like an ass as Rae stepped back into the house. Of course she had to be considerate of her dad and Stella and make sure they could take Linc for the weekend. She wasn’t the kind of mom to just dump her kid and run. She was thoughtful when it came to both her dad and Linc, which reminded me a lot of Abby.

  Although I tried to give her some privacy, bits of the conversation floated back to me. “It’s just until Sunday night. I’ll be back to get him ready for school. It’s just that Gabe’s met all of my family, and I really want to meet his, not to mention hearing them perform the songs he’s been working on.” She paused for a moment. “I know it seems fast, Dad, but you’ve met him. Doesn’t he seem like a nice guy to you?”

  Jeez, I certainly hoped Abe liked me. I’d eaten dinner with him multiple times over the last ten days. More than anything, I hoped he wasn’t trying to talk Rae out of coming with me. “I’m glad to hear you say that, and I’m glad you’ll take Linc for the weekend.”

  Thank God. While inwardly fist-bumping myself, I heard Rae hang up. Within a flash, she had rejoined me. Smiling coyly up at me, she asked, “Can you give me ten minutes to pack?”

  I grinned. “Considering I plan to keep you naked for most of the weekend, I would advise you pack light, and mainly lingerie.”

  She snorted. “Yeah, we’ll just see about that.”

  After she wiggled out of my embrace, she jerked her chin at the door. “Come on. You can break the news to Linc that you’re taking me to the city.”

  With a groan, I said, “Thanks for making me bad cop.”

  “It’s good practice.” She gave me a knowing look before slipping inside the house. I remained frozen in place, processing the enormity of her words. When I could finally put one foot in front of the other again, I rubbed my hand over my chest, where an unfamiliar ache had begun spread.

  As Gabe’s Jeep sped down the interstate toward Atlanta, I fought the urge to pinch myself for the thousandth time. It wasn’t just the fact that I was playing hooky from work for the first time in my adult life and leaving Linc for the weekend; it was everything Gabe had said to me.

  I haven’t really dated anyone in a long time, and it’s been even longer since I tried to make things work with a woman. That said, I’d like to try with you.”

  Gabe wanted to try a relationship with me. Mr. Rich and Famous Country Star wanted to try a relationship with me—a small-town single mother whose glamorous career was running a collision business. Who wouldn’t feel like she was tripping in some alternate universe?

  “You’re awfully quiet,” Gabe said.

  “Just thinking.”

  “About leaving Linc?”

  I turned in my seat to smile at him. I couldn’t help loving that he imagined my thoughts were on my son and not him. “Actually, I was thinking about you.”

  Gabe’s brows shot up. “Dirty thoughts?”

  With a roll of my eyes, I replied, “Not quite.”

  “Bummer.” He momentarily took his eyes off the road to grin at me. “What were you thinking about me?”

  “At the moment, I’m thinking my original impression of you being a sex fiend still rings true.”

  Gabe laughed. “For real though, what were you thinking about?”

  “How surreal this all is, how I never imagined when I woke up this morning that I’d be seeing the Atlanta skyline a few hours later.”

  “No regrets?”

  “None yet.”

  “Good. I was afraid you might be regretting leaving Linc.”

  “Although I’m always sad
to be away from him, it’s not like he’s an infant or it’s the first time we’ve been separated. He went to Boy Scout camp for a week this summer.”

  “And you did okay?”

  “I might’ve cried the first few days…and the day I went to pick him up.”

  Gabe smiled at me. “He’s a lucky kid to have a mom who cares about him so much.”

  “I’m sure he would argue that he’s not so lucky his mom cares because she’s always on his ass.”

  “He might not appreciate it now, but I’m sure he will when he gets older. I know I did, and that’s coming from a guy who had an ultra-strict missionary mom.”

  “Ouch. I’m sure that was pretty intense.”

  “Micah and Abby were always these angel kids, the ones who sat perfectly still in church and never had a hair out of place or dirtied their clothes.” He glanced over me. “Eli and I were hell on wheels, practically from birth.”

  I laughed at his summation. “Surely you weren’t that bad.”

  “I’m pretty sure we gave our parents all the grey hairs they have.”

  Tilting my head in thought, I said, “Out of me and my sisters, I would have to say that me and Kennedy probably tie for giving my dad the most grey hairs. Ellie was just like Micah and Abby—she’s never been in trouble a day in her life. I got pregnant at seventeen, and Kennedy fell in love with a married man while she was in culinary school in Paris.”

  Gabe whistled. “I’d say you guys were neck and neck there for biggest troublemaker.”

  “Thankfully, we both got our acts together, and we haven’t given Dad too much grief since—besides the being unmarried part.”

  “Is your dad on your case to get married like my parents are?”

  “Yes and no. Although he knows my sisters and I are capable of taking care of ourselves, he wants us to have families of our own. I think he really wants us to have what he didn’t—a happy marriage.”

  “My parents want that for Eli and me. More than that, they’d like us on a more straight and narrow path.” He winked. “Give up a life of sin.”

  “I wondered what your parents thought of your career.”

  “They think we’re incredibly blessed to get to make a good living doing something we love. At the same time, they’d appreciate a little less drinking and a little less…” He grimaced.