by J. M. Nevins
Before she continued, Kyle entered the room and stared at her. “If you really mean that, Kit, I won’t hold you anymore. Go ahead and go.”
She looked up and met his eyes, feeling her rage start to bubble up again. She recalled his passive aggressive patterns toward her from time to time when they were together. He had a way of flipping the tables in his favor. Despite knowing he was bending her to his will, a nagging voice inside her encouraged her to stay.
She let out a defeated sigh and looked away. “Fine, I’ll stay.”
He exchanged a look with Alexa. “Let’s head into the living room.”
He watched Kit carefully until she took a seat on his sofa next to Alexa. He opted to take a seat on the chair adjacent to where Kit was sitting. He inched forward on his seat and rested his elbows on his knees, folding his hands in the process, desperate for her to look at him.
Realizing she wouldn’t, he resorted to clearing his throat to capture her attention. “Kit, please look at me.”
She reluctantly shifted her gaze to him, still finding his eyes too dangerous for her. She felt like she was being pulled in. Invisible butterflies started fluttering around in her gut and she swallowed hard.
He nodded. “I’ll start from the beginning. I’ll give you the nutshell version and then you can ask questions afterward. Fair?” She nodded slowly, silently waiting for him to continue.
He sighed. “When we were in Philly, I had started working with the Feds, feeding them information about my dad and some illegal dealings. While all that was going on, I’m ashamed to admit that I had some involvement with the mafia in Philly, New York and Chicago.”
He met her eyes and continued. “The relationships formed because of the parking lots and the trucking company I owned. I was on their good side. I didn’t get involved in their business and they didn’t touch mine. We had sort of an agreement. My dad was starting to interfere with their business, so suddenly it became my problem. Not only did I want to stay in their good graces, but I was so far gone from making any peace with my dad.”
His stare became more intent. “You knew that.” She nodded her head slowly, easily remembering the struggles between Kyle, formerly Kirby Nelson, and his arrogant, U.S. Senator father.
He sighed. “There was this big drug lord in New York. He was causing trouble for everyone in the New York Costa Nostra. I got wind that this drug lord was the kingpin in a governmental bribery scheme directly involving my dad. He would pay off congressmen, mayors, judges and cops and whomever else so the drug ring could proliferate with no one getting busted. They would give my dad a cut of their profits. His cut alone was in the tens of millions every year not that he needed it, greedy son of a bitch.”
He shook his head. “Then they took that operation beyond state lines to run a big national ring. The mafia was pissed and they wanted to take out the drug lord and my dad. They didn’t touch my dad because of me. As you know, my dad had used his power as a senator corruptly on more than one occasion.”
Kit suddenly felt a wave of compassion for Kyle. He had been so ashamed to share that with her at the time when they were together. She nodded and spoke quietly. “I do remember that well, yes.”
Kyle sighed. “I encouraged the mob to leave my dad and the drug lord alone because I thought I could fix it. They loved my idea and let me run with it. I reached out to the Feds. That’s when everything shifted and what I thought would be a simple process was about to change my life forever.”
He cast his eyes down. “I had a few different meetings with my dad. I wore a wire during each of them. I had a meeting with my dad and the drug lord and wore a wire on that one as well—and the Feds rushed in and took them both into custody.”
He swallowed hard and looked up once again. “Then the death threats started coming. Kitty, they were calling our apartment. They were threatening to kill you and me. I notified the Feds. I had a meeting with them. They asked me if I’d be the star witness. Without me they couldn’t get a conviction. They also asked me if there was anyone else who could testify. Your dad was one of those people. I’m sure he didn’t tell you because he couldn’t. There was a huge gag order on the trial. When I got back to Philly, I graduated from Penn and the wheels were in motion for a Federal trial.”
He sighed and cast his eyes down. “The feds notified me that I would be put into the witness protection program. They asked me if I wanted you to come with me because you were my fiancée. I said no.”
Kit eyes widened in disbelief. “What? You had the option to take me with you and you said no? Kirby, what the fuck? I thought you wanted to make me feel better? This makes me feel worse!” She felt a jolt of pain and betrayal, like someone had just sucker punched her.
He looked up at her reflecting her dismay in his own eyes. He nodded. “Hear me out. Kitty, if I would have brought you with me, you would have had to leave your music behind. No music career—ever. No law, nothing. You wouldn’t have been able to live out your dream. I couldn’t bear the thought of taking that away from you. It’s all you ever wanted. It’s all you ever talked about. I told them to put me in the program and leave you out of it. I knew I could handle walking away from a career in business and switch gears. I also knew that once they put me in the program, the death threats to you would stop coming.”
He met her eyes. “You were correct—my death was staged. They died my hair, gave me a new identity and I was relocated to Northern California. They created new academic records for me. Everything you knew of me—my school records at Exeter and Crestridge Academy, my bachelor’s degree at Penn, even my MCAT scores were all wiped out with my old identity. Those items died when Kirby Nelson legally died.
He nodded. “With my new identity as Kyle Nicholls, records say that I was born in Idaho on the twentieth instead of the first, went to an average public high school and attended the University of Washington, with a major in Molecular Biology. Graduated at the top of my class in 1983. They gave me the same MCAT scores under my new name. Whatever they set up worked, and I started med school at Stanford without a hitch that fall.”
Feeling like he was losing Kit’s attention, he looked over at Alexa who gave him an encouraging nod to continue. “When I decided to go into the program, I discussed some career options and paths with them. I made the decision to dedicate myself to medicine. I did my first surgical residency at Stanford and a cardiothoracic fellowship through UCLA, made the right connections and got sent out to Cedars to do my cardiothoracic surgical residency two and a half years ago. I have a few months of it left. I haven’t decided what my next steps are yet.”
He reached forward and gently took her hand in his, pleased she didn’t pull away. He stared into her eyes. “I knew what I did would break your heart and I still feel awful about that. But taking away your dreams felt worse. I knew your heart would heal in time. I didn’t want you to be in some alternative life with me, unhappy in your career—having had your dreams taken away. You would have been unfulfilled and you would have resented me. That’s why I did it, Kit. I honestly didn’t think we’d ever run into each other again.”
Tears welled up in her eyes as she nodded. “So, you did this so I could have my dream?”
He sighed. “Yes. It broke my heart too, Kit. You weren’t the only one that went through it.” He met her eyes again and forced a grin, displaying his irresistible dimples. “Looks like it was worth it. I saw you on those magazine covers. I saw you win those Grammys. Alexa tells me you have a new hit song. You did it, Kitty. You made it in the music world. Always knew you and Joey would.”
She could feel her animosity toward him melting away. She reached for him and he took her into his arms as she quietly cried on his shoulder. She finally pulled back and stroked his cheek as she gazed into his eyes, her whole perspective flooding in. Suddenly everything made sense.
She stroked his cheek and grinned. “Thank you. As much as I loved you and always will, you’re right. If I would have had to give up music, performin
g and my creative self-expression, I really don’t know how I would have made it.”
He chuckled and nodded. “I know that. It’s your life blood. You proved me right seeing all your success.”
She sat back on the sofa and stared at him. “If you were in witness protection, are you suddenly out? How are you able to get in touch with all of us?”
He sat back and got comfortable, feeling more at ease now that a breakthrough between them had occurred. “The drug lord was executed on death row. His minions are locked up for life with no chance of parole. The drug ring has been dismantled for close to a decade. There’s no danger. The threat level doesn’t exist anymore. When I read in the paper that the drug lord was being executed, I knew I was in the clear.”
He grinned. “Just please do not call me Kirby in public. That’s a big no-no.”
Kit eyed him suspiciously. “Is Joe alive too? Was he wrapped up in all of this?”
Kyle sighed and Kit noticed his eyes cloud over with sadness once again. He shook his head. “No, Kitty. Joey is really gone. I was curious too, so I looked up his medical records. His death was legit. I did some poking around and found out that he had a family history of brain aneurisms. His drug use made him a ticking time bomb. I’m surprised he lived as long as he did. Had he not been a drug user, he may have had a decent life. He could have taken the appropriate precautions. His medical history paired with the cocaine abuse did him in. No win situation.”
He shook his head regretfully. “Hearing of his death was overwhelming for me. At the time, I was in med school and I couldn’t share with anyone that I knew Joe personally. It was a very difficult time.”
She met his eyes. “Have you told anyone else in our group of friends?” Her eyes then widened. “Oh shit, Spence! Kirby you have to tell him. Have you talked to him yet?”
Alexa interjected. “Not yet, Kitty. Maybe it’s best you initiate that meeting.”
Kit nodded slowly. “Ok.” She met Kyle’s eyes. “He really looked up to you. You were a great role model to him.”
He chuckled. “He was a great kid. I guess he’s not a kid anymore.”
Kit chuckled. “No. Wharton grad like me. He runs my management company. He’s a big CEO these days.”
Kit surveyed Kyle closely and couldn’t wipe the grin from her face. “A doctor, huh? Cardiothoracic surgeon, even. Makes sense. You always were a brainiac. Anyone who double majors in biochem and econ at Penn has gotta be a different kinda brainy.”
Alexa watched them both closely and started to feel like a third wheel. She thought it best to slip out and let them reconnect. Now that there was no danger of Kit running out for good, she decided to bow out gracefully.
Before Kyle could respond, Alexa stood up. She grinned. “I think you two have a lot of catching up to do. So, on that note, I’m going to head out. Kyle, I’m going to take the limo. Can you give Kitty a ride home? Or should I send the limo back?”
He nodded and grinned. “Take the limo. I’ll make sure she gets home safely.” He stood up and approached her. “Let me walk you out.”
Kit said her goodbyes to Alexa, discreetly whispered to her to send the limo back and resumed her seat on the comfortable sofa as Kyle led Alexa out.
She sat back and let out a long sigh. Her head was swirling. She wasn’t sure what was coming next. Seeing Kyle in the flesh had left her shaken down to the core. She couldn’t deny her attraction to him. Even after all these years, it still remained as strong as it did almost a decade ago. Alexa was right—he had gotten even better looking with age.
Kyle returned to the living room with a new glass of sparkling water for Kit, presenting it to her as he took a seat to her left. He glanced over at her and grinned, showcasing his irresistible dimples. “Are you going to kick me off the sofa?”
She chuckled and sipped her drink. “No. Alexa’s right. We have lots to discuss.” She set her drink down on the coffee table and turned to face him. “You’re a surgeon now. Honestly, Kirby, or Kyle or whatever the fuck your name is now, your line of work is not too surprising.”
She smiled. “I think I knew this would happen for you. The medicine thing. I remember seeing that shift in you.” She slowly surveyed him and forced a grin. “I remember how bored you were running your companies. It was like it was too easy for you. It was like you needed more of a challenge—something that would give you a thrill. I know you always liked helping people too.”
He nodded. “I did.” He grinned. “Kit, I love your foundation. I love being a part of it. I can assure you, I didn’t sign on in hopes of getting close to you, I signed on for the cause.”
Kit grinned as her emerald eyes danced with contentment. “I heard you’re very passionate about it. You’ve done a lot for us. I really appreciate that. I know my grandmother would have too. Moira and Tabitha have been raving about you from day one. I remember Moira mentioning they had to persuade you to come on board as our chief medical advocate.”
He chuckled. “All true. And they wanted to pay me a salary too, but I declined.”
Kit looked around his condo. “Nice place. I see you were able to keep your money through all of it.”
He rolled his eyes and sighed. He knew he couldn’t tell her the truth, so he developed a full proof story. “No, actually, I just got it back. The Feds had my accounts seized and indefinitely frozen when I went into witness protection.”
He nodded and his green eyes reflected a deep remorse. “Kit, I’m sorry things got so screwed up. I left you an account with two million dollars, so you would be able to take care of yourself and continue to pursue music, but it didn’t work out that way. It’s a long story.” He shook his head in disappointment and cast his eyes down.
She reached forward and patted his hand. “That sounds like something you would do. I’m sure you had good intentions.”
He nodded and felt himself drawn into her. He grinned. “I did the best I could.”
She met his eyes and could see the intensity building. She swallowed hard. She could feel that mounting attraction once again, yet she felt strangely uncomfortable in a way that was startling.
She grinned sheepishly. “Kyle, as much as I’m enjoying our reconnecting, I need to get home. I have some things to tie up.”
She reached forward and touched his hand. “But, I’d like to continue our getting to know each other and restore our friendship.” She giggled and her green eyes danced with delight. “I think it’s really cool that you’re such a successful surgeon. One that happened to save my life!”
He smiled and nodded. “Thank you. Let’s get you back home. I understand how busy you are and I appreciate you taking the time. I’ll definitely take you up on getting together again.”
She stood up and bobbed her head. “Yeah.” She patted him on the arm. “I’m going to head out. The limo is waiting downstairs. I asked Alexa to send it back.”
He frowned. “Uh-huh. I figured you would. Kit, I’ll come with you. See that you get home ok.”
She grinned and got on her tippy toes to kiss him on the cheek. “Now, that’s just like you. I guess some things never do change. I’ll be ok. Call you soon?” She could see the disappointment in his eyes.
He nodded slowly. “Yes, please do.”
Alexa shook her head, grinning from ear-to-ear as she welcomed Kit into her new home that was finally furnished. She hastily took a seat on her new plush sofa and motioned for Kit to do the same. “I knew you’d end up here. Spill! Do you hate me?” Her violet eyes bore into Kit.
She chuckled and took a seat on the sofa next to her, letting out a long sigh. She turned to face her. “I don’t hate you. Shocked, yes. Processing right now? Absolutely.”
She buried her face in her hands and shook her head slowly, her voice muffled when she spoke. “Oh God, I’m so screwed, Lex. He’s gotten even better with age. No!”
Alexa laughed and threw her arm around her. “It’s understandable that he rattled your cage. I get it. Yes, he is pretty damned h
ot. Kirby was always gorgeous, that’s a fact, but he’s off the chain these days. Wow. I even find myself getting a little hot and bothered looking at him.”
Kit looked up, met Alexa’s eyes and sighed. “Yeah. When I hugged him before I left…” She shook her head and looked away. “Feeling kinda confused now.”
Alexa nodded. “I can see why. Kirby or Kyle or whatever his name is now, was your first love. He was good to you for the most part. But Kit, you are not the girl you were back then and he’s not the guy. Things have changed immensely for both of you. You’ve come a long way. Don’t forget that part.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “At the moment, I don’t know which way is up. I’m legally separated from a man that I still have feelings for and doesn’t want the separation but reluctantly signed off on it to me happy, no doubt.”
She met Alexa’s eyes. “It makes me question everything considering I spent those hours cuddling with him after finding out Lew passed. I can’t stop thinking about Sully. I know there are feelings there and they run very deep. It scares me to feel into it, Lex. Yet, I cannot deny that serious magnetic attraction to Kirby, um, Kyle.”
She slumped back into the fluffy couch and stared straight ahead. “I cannot remember the last time I had sex. It’s been so long.”
She shook her head in disbelief and glanced over at Alexa. “This is bad. It’s like I want to jump him. I feel like a ticking time bomb. Ugh. My head is spinning.” She buried her face in her hands and shook her head slowly from side to side.
Alexa chuckled as she nodded and rubbed Kit’s knee lovingly. “You’ll get some clarity soon, honey. Take it slow. As much as you want to jump Kirby-Kyle, and honestly, I don’t blame you, it probably won’t pan out like you thought. Babe, no one is telling you to rush into another relationship for goodness sake. You’ve been through the ringer with Sully this last year. By all means, have your fun, just don’t do it with Kyle. Find some other hot piece of ass, have him sign a non-disclosure agreement like all the smart bands do with their groupies and you’re good.”
