Chasing Stars
Page 30
“That sounds amazing.” I look at the baby. “I think she’s cute. I can’t wait to go home and make clothes for them.”
“You should open a business,” he says, bringing my fingers to his lips.
I smile. “Will you support me while I be a mom for a while? Then go to school so I can open a boutique?”
“Anything you want.” He looks at my eyes, checking for underlying sadness. Satisfied, he moves on. “I was walking around in the city a week or so ago, before we talked that time and you got mad at me.”
I look at him funny. “I didn’t get mad at you. I want things to happen organically. Not because it’s what we’re supposed to do. I want you to want to marry me, not because of your mom.” I roll my eyes and look back at the baby at my breast.
“Yeah, well, you can’t say that because I’ve been asking you to marry me for a long time. And I did marry you.”
I look at him with a smile, wondering where this is going, not caring. “I guess that’s true.”
“I wanted to talk to you because you’re a very special person and I never know what to do with you. You’re a rainbow.”
I laugh softly. “Really, Mick Jagger?”
“I had these plans in my head about making a huge deal of things and calling the whole town out and proposing to you in front of our diner or something.”
“That makes me dizzy thinking about it. And it doesn’t sound like you.” I look at his fingers laced with mine.
“No, but I would do it. Or at Sunday dinner surprise everyone and come out with it. Or hand you the box and say, ‘Here, put it on, you’re mine now.’”
I laugh. Oh my God.
“I was also thinking about taking you to the land I’m buying and standing in the middle and getting on one knee.” He looks at my tear sparkly eyes and bitten lip. He smiles. “Is that the right one? I haven’t gotten to the last one yet.”
I close my eyes and let the tears fall to clear my vision. “That one’s number one so far. But continue.” I look at him again.
“I would take you on a walk to the skipping rocks spot by the tree and lay you down and make love to you and hold you and tell you how much you mean to me and how I want you to be in my life forever, no matter what, even if you don’t marry me, but I’d like you to, and I want you to have my babies and I want to see you get fat and happy and I want to give you everything you want. I would tell you that I want to see you in that dress you were working on. And then I would put the ring I bought you while walking around the city on your finger. You’d be so happy you’d make love to me and we’d stay there, talking about everything we’re going to do together and all the babies we’re going to have and the house I’m going to build you.” He kisses my fingertips.
“That one’s good.” I rub my wet cheeks on the shoulders of my shirt. “Except you’ll have to wait six weeks and I don’t know if I can do the dress. It brings back too much hurt.” I shrug. “And I want the ring now.”
“Are you sure? We can wait.”
“No. I want it now.”
“So does that mean you want to marry me?”
“Yes. I want the sparklies.” I grin.
He pulls it out of his pocket. “It’s a modest amount of sparklies.” He smiles and slips it onto my finger. “I love you.”
I close my eyes and let myself be kissed and loved, kissing and loving back.
The End
Acknowledgements
First and foremost before anyone else, I have to thank my husband for his total awesomeness. I never thought about actually being a writer until he encouraged me to take those spiral notebooks out of the box and type them out. So, thank you, Adam. You’re the best. You’re the man romance novels should be made of.
Thank you to my children who have been so loving and patient, and try their best to not destroy the house while mommy is writing and just saying, “Mmhm. That’s nice. Sure. Uh huh. Wow. That’s awesome.” And you are all better than kittens every day.
Thank you also to my sisters. Teresa, thank you for your positivity, encouragement, cheerleading, and your beta reading. Kim, thank you for flipping pages and getting into it and then just letting go and reading my book.
And thank you to the rest of my family for being just crazy enough to work and give me lots of inspiration but not crazy enough to be too scary. I love and value the safety I always felt when I was little, which is why I feel so strongly about understanding the kids that don’t.
And thank you to the amazing writers and artists I have met while working on this book. Thank you Claire at Claireworks for my gorgeous book cover. And thank you to my three best writing friends, Lia, Chiquita, and Kinney. Without our daily chats, I would never have gotten this thing done.
I have been headstrong but I have always had people hold out their hands to help me along when I didn’t know for sure if I had a soft place to land. Thank you to Susan and Ann for taking me in and feeding and sheltering me when I needed it. And all of my ladies at my first job who grew my love for women and mothers, aunts and friends. I love you all and think about you every day. Not a day goes by I don’t use the wisdom you pushed onto me in your half-hour sessions, 3-5days a week.
If you or anyone you know is having trouble at home, there are resources out there for you:
https://www.childwelfare.gov/
http://www.kidsmatterinc.org/for-families/abuse-and-neglect-resources/
http://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Resource_Centers/Child_Abuse_Resource_Center/Home.aspx
https://www.rainn.org/
Thank you also to you, my reader. I never thought in a million years that I might be able to make a living and feed my kids off of doing something I love and care so strongly about. You can help even further by writing a quick review and rating books after reading, and sharing on social media. You can find me on Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, and I would love it if you clicked here and signed up for my newsletter so I can give you info about new releases, freebies, and short stories.
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Love,
Me