Love Is a Battlefield

by Annalisa Daughety

  Dear Kristy, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about our relationship. I know we’ve been together for three years, but I’m starting to think that maybe we aren’t meant to be. I wish I would’ve figured this out sooner, before you helped me pick out the house and put in your notice at work. And especially before our wedding day was upon us. But I don’t think I can commit to a lifetime with you. I do still love you, though, and I hope to see you again someday.Love, Mark

  P.S. If you have any of my things, you can just box them up and mail them to my new house.The letter had been waiting at her house when she got back from their almost wedding. Not only did Mark leave her at the altar; he didn’t have the decency to end the relationship in person. Even after several weeks, the letter still got to her. Although now when she read it, she didn’t immediately burst into tears. Now the first emotion she felt was anger. And maybe a little sadness.

  Three years. She’d spent three years with a man who promised her the world. They’d had it all planned out. All the way down to the names of the kids they wanted in a couple of years. Unfortunately, Mark’s fear of commitment outweighed his love for her.

  She looked at the dress for a few more minutes then sat on the bed and read through three years’ worth of cards and letters. By the time she got to the pictures of the two of them in happier times, the tears were flowing freely. She told herself this was the last cry she was going to have over him. Although she couldn’t help but wonder if she was crying over the loss of Mark—or the loss of the time she’d wasted on Mark.

  Looking back over their relationship, Kristy knew he was right. If marrying him had been something she’d really wanted to do, she would’ve pressed the issue more during the years they’d spent together. Instead, it took him being transferred hundreds of miles away for her to tell him that she thought it was time they did more than just talk about the future.

  His response had been great at first. A perfect proposal with a perfect ring. Then they went house hunting and found their dream home, where they would raise a family. Kristy picked out furniture, wall colors, and new flooring. The next logical step was the wedding, and she’d even offered to elope because she knew how nervous weddings made him. But he wanted a real wedding. Except that when it came down to it, he didn’t want a wedding at all.

  A loud knock on the front door sliced into her pounding head. The repeated banging propelled her off the bed. She wasn’t expecting anyone. And she hated it when people dropped in unannounced. Especially on days like the one she was having. A glance in the mirror revealed that particular brand of red, splotchy face that only came with hours of crying. And she’d never been one to cry pretty, like some girls do.

  Kristy glanced out the blinds and groaned. Ace, shifting from one foot to the other, stood on her front porch holding Sam. Just what she needed.

  She could either open the door and let Ace know she’d been crying her eyes out, or do something drastic.

  He knocked again.

  She chose drastic. She wasn’t going to let him see her cry.

  “Just a minute,” she called to him.

  Kristy ran into the bathroom, grabbed some menthol face cream, and slathered it all over her red face. White face-mask face was better than red, crying face any day.

  She opened the door and hoped her fake smile looked sincere.

  “Thanks for returning my little escape artist.” Why was it every time she ended up around him, she was trying to act normal?

  He looked at her with worry darkening his eyes. “Here you go.” He handed Sam over to her. “Is everything okay?” He leaned toward her a little as they made the exchange, and his gaze seemed to see every tear mark beneath her face cream.

  “Oh yeah. I’m fine. Just had a headache and thought this herbal mask might help.” The headache was real at least. But herbal mask? Really? One good sniff and he’s gonna know this is Noxzema.

  “I hope you feel better. And if you’d like me to take a look at your fence, I’d be glad to.” He patted Sam on the head then brought his gaze back up to meet hers. “It seems like this little guy is determined to get out. I’d hate for anything to happen to him.”

  Her cheeks ached from smiling. She took a step back and started to close the door. “Thanks for the offer. Maybe some other time?”

  After the door was firmly shut behind her, she stepped to the window and watched him walk down the front path to his truck. She remembered plainly the kindness in his voice the other night at the stakeout when he’d asked her if she hated him. Why was he being so nice to her?

  “Maybe he feels sorry for me because he thinks I got left at the altar and lost my mind,” she murmured to Sam as she lowered the pup to the floor. “Stay out of trouble while I wash my face.” Kristy splashed cool water on her face then stared at the puffy, red eyes in the mirror. Had her mask fooled him at all?

  Hopefully she just looked sick. She certainly felt sick.

  ***

  “Don’t you see? The whole Robert fake date made you own up to your true feelings about Mark.” Ainsley was apparently trying to use the psychology class she took in college. “You said yourself that you weren’t all that upset when you thought Robert stood you up. You were relieved, which meant you didn’t want to go anyway, right?”

  “Yeah.” Kristy nodded, even though she knew Ainsley couldn’t see her.

  “So you didn’t care until you realized Robert knew you would have gone out with him had he actually asked. So it’s pretty simple to me.” Ainsley was really getting into her psychologist role now.

  “What’s that?” Kristy spooned another scoop of dark chocolate ice cream into her mouth and savored the smooth, rich taste.

  “Pride. Your pride is hurt. Again. You don’t want to be vulnerable. And you are.”

  Kristy sighed. “Maybe. Or maybe I was right in the first place and need to be on my own for a little while.”

  “I think you need to talk to Mark. Get some closure. Didn’t you say he called?”

  “He called last Monday but didn’t leave a message. He always hated leaving messages.” number sixteen on the list of reasons they weren’t right for each other.

  “Well, answer the phone the next time he calls. Or even better, call him yourself. You know he must be open to talking to you, or he never would’ve called you in the first place. And I don’t think you’re going to be able to move on until you’ve talked to him.”

  “I don’t know. I think that might open up a can of worms.”

  “Or it might be exactly what you need in order to get over it.” she paused. “I think it might be worth a try.” At least Ainsley didn’t pretend to have all the answers.

  Kristy decided a subject change was in order. These past few weeks, it seemed like all their conversations had been about her. “How’s everything with you? Any fun news?”

  “Actually...” Ainsley trailed off and took a deep breath. “Brad and I have decided we’re ready to be parents.” Her excitement flashed through the phone line and immediately made Kristy feel better. “We’ve been married now for four years. I think we’re finally in a place where we can handle a baby.”

  “Wow. That’s great. You’ll be great parents.” Of all the couples she knew, Brad and Ainsley were the one she’d always thought would be the best parents.

  “We’re so excited. Ever since my nephew came to spend a week with us last year, Brad’s been talking about how much he wants to be a dad. It’s adorable.”

  “Well, keep me posted.”

  “Of course. You and Vickie are the only ones who know. If I tell my family, every time they see or talk to me, they’ll ask if I’m expecting. And that will get old fast.”

  Kristy laughed. “You’re right. I’ll say a little prayer for you, but I promise not to ask. I’ll just wait for happy news.”

  “Great. That’s what I was hoping.”

  They said their good-byes, and Kristy busied herself with a few household chores. An hour later, laundry was done, dishes were done
, and Sam was full. She considered calling her mother but thought better of it. They’d already made plans to meet at church tomorrow. Kristy felt sure they could hash out her problems over lunch when she broke the news to her mother about the Robert/Zach incident.

  Sinking into a steamy bubble bath, Kristy thought about what Ainsley had confided on the phone. She and Brad were the most “in love” couple she’d ever met, so there was no doubt they’d do great at parenting. In fact, one of the nagging doubts in her own relationship had been that she and Mark had never seemed to be as in sync as Brad and Ainsley. When she’d brought it up to Mark, he’d scoffed and said she shouldn’t compare relationships. But she’d always attributed it to the fact that Brad and Ainsley were friends before they dated. Brad was quick to tell people how much he loved being married to his best friend. And Ainsley could spend hours gushing over how blessed she was to have found him.

  What must it be like to have a love like that?

  CHAPTER 16

  “It’s open,” Ace called as he walked down the hallway toward the sound of knocking on his front door.

  Owen Branam opened the door part of the way and stuck his head inside. “Are you ready, man?”

  “Ready.” Ace followed him down the steps and climbed into Owen’s old Bronco.

  “Steve’s meeting us there. Said his wife was glad for him to get out of the house so she can pack.” Owen steered the Bronco out of the driveway and toward the park exit.

  “Pack? Where’s she going?” Ace asked.

  “They’re taking a trip to Europe. Some kind of second honeymoon. Gonna be gone practically the whole summer.” Owen slowed to a stop at the highway and waited for a car to pass.

  “Wow. That’s quite a vacation.”

  “Yeah. He had a hard time talking Arnie and Hank into letting him off that long. And after the vandal hit the monuments, they tried to make him stay.” Owen flipped the air conditioner a notch higher. “But the tickets he has are nonrefundable, so they went ahead and told him he could have the time off.”

  “Guess he was relieved.”

  “More like his wife was. I’m not sure Steve is the world-traveling type, but I guess a man will do a lot for the woman he loves.”

  Ace chuckled. “I’ll say.”

  He’d been a little hesitant when Owen had asked him if he wanted to have a guys’ night out. In his experience, guys’ night out usually meant beer and bars, and neither of those things appealed to him. But when Owen mentioned a steak house in Savannah that was supposed to be good, Ace figured it would be a pretty tame night.

  They pulled into the crowded parking lot. Despite the cars, the restaurant looked like little more than someone’s house. Ace shot a questioning look at Owen.

  “Don’t let the outside fool you,” Owen warned. “The steaks are delicious. And the sweet tea is even better than my grandmother’s was, God rest her soul.”

  Steve was already in a booth, waiting.

  “What took y’all so long? I’m a hungry man.” He was also a large man. If Ace had to guess, he’d say this wasn’t Steve’s first time at the steak house.

  They ordered steak and baked potatoes all around.

  “Could we have some bread, darlin’?” Owen asked the waitress.

  “Sure thing, Mr. Owen. It’ll be right out.”

  “Darlin’?” Ace asked once she had left the table.

  Owen chuckled. “Welcome to the south.”

  Ace had definitely noticed a bit of a difference in the sleepy Tennessee town from the city he was used to. It wasn’t better or worse, just different. Things seemed a little slower. Cars were slower; people walked slower. But it was kind of nice. There was an abundance of sweet tea and fried food. And it helped that he was a bit taken with the southern drawl. A grin played across his lips as he remembered Kristy’s southern-flavored spiel to park visitors. He still thought one reason they stayed awake for her and snoozed for him was because of her accent. Of course, when he’d shared that theory with her, she wasn’t thrilled.

  “So, Ace. What brings you down here?” Steve asked. “Do you have relatives here or something?”

  “I’m just here for the job.” And access to the archives. But Steve wasn’t asking about his personal business. “I worked for the park service in Illinois and decided I was ready to transfer on to a different park.”

  “And you chose Shiloh?” Steve asked. “Is Civil War history your thing, then?”

  “I guess you could say that.” Ace knew his ulterior motive for choosing Shiloh would come out eventually, but he was in no hurry to reveal it.

  The waitress put heaping mounds of rolls and corn bread in the center of the table.

  “Here you go. There’s honey, butter, and jelly for the biscuits.” she set a bowl full of condiments on the table. “Your steaks will be out soon.”

  “Thanks,” Owen called.

  “Darlin’,” Ace said with a laugh.

  Owen let out a loud guffaw and put a big glob of butter on a steaming biscuit. “so, Ace, are you single? Married? Divorced? surely a young man like yourself has a lady in his life.”

  “I’m single. No lady to speak of.” He reached for a packet of strawberry jam.

  Owen shook his head. “That’s a shame.”

  Steve laughed. “He’s smart if you ask me.”

  “Now, we all know you’d be lost without Amy. So don’t you be givin’ us that stuff.” Owen wiped his mouth with a napkin and took another biscuit from the plate.

  Steve grinned, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “You know it.”

  “Well, what about you, Owen? I know that Steve’s married and getting ready to jet off to Europe, but haven’t heard much about your story. Are you married?” Ace asked.

  For a moment, a dark cloud came over Owen’s normally sunny face.

  “Nah.” He shook his head. “I was. We were together twenty years. She died nearly five years ago, though. Cancer.” He took a sip of tea. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever been through.”

  “I’m sorry, man.” Ace knew from losing Caroline how hard it was to lose someone important to you. But to lose someone you’d built a life with must be terrible.

  “Thanks. At first, I didn’t know how I’d get through. But as they say, time heals.”

  “Here you go, gentlemen.” The waitress set thick steaks and foil-wrapped baked potatoes in front of each of them. “Dig in.”

  Ace said a silent blessing for the food then bit into the best steak he’d ever had. “Man, Owen, you were sure right about this place.”

  “Stick with me, boy. I won’t steer you wrong.”

  “Hey, Ace,” Steve said in a voice so casual it couldn’t have been an accident, “do you and Kristy get along?”

  Ace frowned. Unfortunately, the blond still saw him as an enemy. But for his part, they got along. “I guess we do. Why?”

  “No reason. Except that I saw you on her porch earlier today while I was out on patrol.”

  “Oh. Yeah, her dog had gotten out, and I was returning him. Not a big deal.”

  “I just wondered. You know, the two of you are about the same age.” Steve wiggled his bushy gray eyebrows in Ace’s direction.

  “Now, you know she’s in no state to be dating,” Owen piped up rather protectively. “Besides, they work together, so that wouldn’t be a good idea.”

  Steve laughed. “Owen thinks he’s her daddy,” he explained to Ace. “She’s been working here so long, we’ve practically seen her grow up.”

  “I’m just worried about her is all,” Owen said defensively. “Besides, there was some guy out today on one of her programs that had her all riled up. I saw them talking after it was over. And it wasn’t long afterward that she went home with a headache.” He cut another bite of steak and swished it through the sauce before popping it into his mouth. “She might’ve fooled Hank, but I saw those tears in her eyes.”

  Ace remembered the look on her face when she’d stepped onto her porch that afternoon. He’d
known then that she’d been crying. That mask hadn’t fooled him. But he figured she’d just have to get through it on her own. And as Owen had said, time heals.

  “I’m pretty sure you don’t need to worry about Kristy and me dating,” Ace said. “But if you have any other prospects, send them my way.” Deep down, he had to admit that since Caroline’s death, no woman had caught his interest like the blue-eyed ranger with the feisty personality. But a man had his pride. And no way he was going to let these guys know he might have an interest in someone who couldn’t stand him.

  CHAPTER 17

  Kristy knew there was one huge drawback in going to church with her mother. It was likely that she’d see Robert’s mom. And sure enough, as soon as she entered the building, there were Dorothy and Nancy, engaged in an animated conversation. They spotted Kristy immediately and waved her over.

  “I was just telling Nancy how angry I was to hear about what Zach did.” Dorothy shook her head. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into him lately.”

  Her mom’s tight smile told her she was none too happy to have heard the whole sordid story from Dorothy rather than from Kristy’s own mouth. Kristy gave her mom a side-armed hug and greeted Dorothy. “Don’t worry about it. It was a misunderstanding, I’m sure.” The twerp. She hoped he’d gotten his bike taken away. Or whatever it was that would hurt the most.

  “He’s very sorry,” Dorothy said.

  A throat cleared behind her and she turned to see Zach, looking anything but sorry. If possible, he was glowering more than last week. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

  “Apology accepted,” Kristy said with more cheer than she felt.

  “I’m so relieved that you’re not mad,” Dorothy said as she put an arm around Zach.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Time for a change of topic. No use rehashing her humiliation with them. “Since y’all live so close to the park, you might want to be on the lookout for a vandal,” Kristy said. “Someone spray-painted two of the monuments recently.”