Death's Widow

by Lori Aisling

  His words weighed heavy on my mind. The easy-going, romantic girl I once was in my mortal life was just dealt a heavy dose of reality. Being Callon’s mate came with incredible responsibility. Mistakes such as the one at the hotel could not be made again. I might not be so lucky with a second encounter.

  Furthermore, days of soaking in the sun and shopping followed by fancy restaurants and dancing the night away were a luxury I was not going to be able to indulge in right now. I needed to learn this power I inherited- perfect it and harness it. Otherwise, I was not only a liability to Callon and myself but to the entire mortal world.

  Repeating my thoughts to him, he steepled his fingers, resting his chin on them. “I admire your tenacity and devotion, though I’m saddened that your commitment to me will come at the price of your desired experiences. I want to provide that for you, Amara. A life of love, excitement, and adventure. I never want you to regret your choice.”

  “I won’t- I know I made the best decision of my life - and I feel blessed to have the opportunity. I know it will take time, but this is the responsible way to proceed. Once I am no longer a weakness to you, we will be able to enjoy anything and everything we want. We have all the time in the world, remember? Besides, I can’t be happy knowing every time we go somewhere you have to be constantly vigilant to keep me from getting taken. I have always taken care of myself, and I don’t plan on changing my ways now. For the first time in your life, you have someone who will help you. I want to do that.”

  He smiled and rose from the leather chair, circling the desk to pull me into him. “You did really well, you know. I understand you were scared and overwhelmed, but when it came right down to it, you knew what to do and you believed in your intent.”

  “Did you feel me call for you? I felt a burning on my mark, but I didn’t know if you came because of that, or if it was lucky timing.”

  “I felt you, Amara. It wasn’t just a nudge either, like you have done in the past when we are apart and you think of me. It was a pull- one I could not have denied even if I wanted to. It was a demand that could not be ignored. I am really proud of you; you easily mastered intent on language, plus the bond between us. Your training may not be as tedious and lengthy as we once thought. You’re extremely receptive and willing.”

  “Tenacious and bull-headed might be a better description, but thank you. I want to be an asset, not a burden. Before I forget and we move on to another topic, you mentioned ‘realms’ earlier. Does that mean there is more than one planet?”

  “No, not a planet, more like a dimension. It’s hard to explain. Think of it this way- dimensions are like pages in a book. Each individual page is its own reality but is connected to the binding. Together, they are one. But separately, they are many, and individualistic.”

  “Are they human, like the realm I came from or are all the urban legends true? Vampires and werewolves? Or sprites and fairies?”

  “Every dimension is different, yes. But not quite to the extent you mentioned. There is a set number of souls. When the Beginnings occurred, or were created, the souls were spread evenly amongst them. Each realm is unique in numerous ways, but the evolution of its beings was left up to the inhabitants. Some realms evolved quicker, some barely at all. In that aspect, very few are highly populated and those worlds will garnish the most interest from the Timeless because that is where the most number of souls will come from, and return to. The dimension, or realm, you remember as your home contains far and above the most souls, currently. With strife comes death, and the reaping of souls. How those souls are reassigned keeps the power struggle between the warring factions ever busy. The Light is determined that a true and just realm will aid in garnishing enough souls for them to defeat the Dark permanently, leading to a utopia for all. Oddly enough, Lucifer’s views are more similar to mine, and he fights hard to maintain a strong presence of the Dark in all worlds, arguing his faction is indeed necessary to maintain the designs the Beginning created. I don’t know which way is truly correct, but I have learned there is no such thing as a perfect society. Or a perfectly evil one.”

  “Hence the reason for the Counterbalance. Since you are unbiased, you don’t give either faction an edge. You remove any option for corruption of the leger, granting an advantage.”

  “Exactly. In time, all worlds fail for some reason or another and are left vacant until the realm is available to sustain life yet again. Such has been since the dawn of humanity. The destruction of a world is not a written formula. Sometimes, it’s man-made disasters. Others, it’s natural disasters that cannot be explained. In time, you will see your realm fall and another will have taken its place. It’s the cycle.”

  Like many of the other things I learned since becoming Death’s mate, I felt a sense of ‘rightness’ concerning his explanation. It seemed odd I would not feel remorse thinking about my home world falling, but it wouldn’t be the end, instead a rebirth. Much like Death’s duties, actually. It was natural and designed. I felt my lips turn up in a smile as I pulled my soulmate close, closing my eyes and absorbing the unfettered love that flowed through our bond as he returned my embrace.

  “Enough talk for now,” he purred in my ear. “Being this close to you has made me think you are yet again wearing too much clothing. Just out of curiosity, how do you like this desk?”

  His eyes blazed with an all-familiar heat as he grabbed the bottom of the hoodie donned and pulled it up over my head. Yes, I rather loved this desk.

  Fake It ‘Til You Make It

  Callon’s lips trailed down my neck, nipping across my collarbone before he stopped and spun me around on the polished wood surface. I felt his tongue tracing the pattern of the bonding mark on my back and I cried out, clutching the edges of the solid desk, trying not to absolutely come undone. Every single emotional fiber of my being seemed attached to that brand, the sensation was incredible- and unexpected. Ironically, it must have held a direct line to my nether regions; I could feel my body heat rise, moisture gathering between my legs.

  I reached behind me, grabbing at his shirt, aching to feel him closer to me. A familiar pounding interrupted my reverie. “You have got to be kidding me,” I snarled. “You have more do-drop-inners than any person I have ever known. And their timing is impeccable, I must add.”

  “I’m as irritated as you, love. I’m not surprised, though. After the ‘incident’ at the hotel, I assumed I would have visitors. The ledger has been completed and news of the Timeless soul will have spread rapidly.”

  The pounding increased and I winced, giving him an empathetic look. “Again, sorry about that. I’m guessing turning Cupid into créme brulee might be frowned upon?”

  Callon laughed, pulling me from the desk. “Get dressed, and stay here.” While walking from the room he added, “I think it was more like flambé. Or perhaps blackened.” Yep, that took Cajun cuisine off my menu for a while.

  Quickly pulling the hoodie back over my head, I proceeded to follow him. Stay here, my ass. If he wanted a female who followed his every command, he should have invested in a cocker spaniel instead. Besides, the reason for this visit was most likely due to my lack of foresight at the Four Seasons.

  I stayed out of sight, choosing a spot in the living room that blocked me from view of the large entryway but gave me a clean line of sight. Callon was mumbling under his breath as he jerked open the front door. Ice filled my veins when the entirely-too-gorgeous Jophiel floated through the door, pushing her way in as if she had every right.

  “I didn’t invite you to enter. I wish you would leave,” Callon growled.

  The stunning angel waved her hand at him as if what he said held no merit. “Just stop, Cal. You know we need to talk. It was better for me to come than Michael or Metatron. You have caused quite the stir with that ridiculous stunt you pulled in Egypt.” She wandered into the kitchen and opened a cupboard door. “Be a dear and fetch me a bottle of pinot grigio. I know you prefer reds, but I’ll bet you have something special tucked away in
your cellar for me.”

  “I have nothing for you, Jophiel. You are not a guest in my home, and I have nothing to speak with you about. I don’t answer to you- any of you, for that matter. Your wretched little beast threatened what is mine. Did you really think I would do nothing?”

  “You killed a Timeless, Callon. And you didn’t stop there. You sentenced him as a Void. You tote yourself as the pious Counterbalance, yet what you did indeed causes a power shift. This is getting completely out of hand- she is a simple mortal! Just wash your hands of this mess, already. I know you have bonded with her... that news spread rapidly. So, she has fucked and sucked you into contentment. Why isn’t that enough?”

  My nails dug into my palms, my teeth threatening to crack under the strain of my clenched jaw as I watched the blonde become entirely too comfortable. She breezed to the other side of the kitchen, looking disdainfully at the coffee pot on the counter. “You and your coffee. It’s so...eww. Seriously, now. I’m parched, and I did come here in good faith. How about a nice martini?”

  “Get. Out!” Callon shouted, pointing at the door.

  Jophiel sighed, rolling her eyes while smoothing the fabric of the sleek red gown she was wearing. The sides were split to her thigh and she wore matching stiletto heels. Overdress much? It was official- I despised this bitch. “Callon, dear. I understand this is a stressful time for you, but let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we? We were good together, baby. The chemistry was there; you were the best I ever had.”

  “Joe, I’m warning you. Stop.”

  “No, I don’t think I will. I think it’s time we got this all out in the open and you started thinking with the correct head, forgive my crassness.”

  Unable to contain myself any longer, I stepped into the kitchen. “So if you are insinuating he was thinking only with his dick by choosing me, then why all the talk about how great you were together?” I asked innocently.

  Callon slapped his hands over his face while Jophiel glared at me. This scene was becoming a lot like something I would have made fun of on daytime TV.

  “Do you have any idea the mess you have caused?” she screeched at me. “This is so much bigger than your simple crush!” Turning her gaze back to Callon, her features softened. “I’m glad she is here, baby. I think she should hear all about our time together, don’t you?” Without waiting for an answer, she powered on as she turned to face me; her steely blue eyes staring into mine. “He couldn’t keep his hands off of me. The moment we got into the room, he actually tore off my bodice. He was insatiable. I can’t even remember how many times he made me come with his mouth. His head between my thi-”

  “SHUT UP!” I screamed, fury radiating through me, my hand slicing through the air. The craziest part of the whole scenario was she actually did, but not by choice. Her mouth was sealed shut, smooth flesh where her lips once were.

  She clawed at her face, staring wide-eyed at me before turning an accusing glare at Callon. He held his hands in the air, struggling to contain a chuckle.

  “She warned you,” he said, humor lacing his tone. “Don’t look at me like that, I didn’t do it- she did. Although I am a bit jealous I didn’t think of it first. Now please, sit quietly and when I’m done, we are going to hash this out- respectfully.” Turning his eyes to me, he motioned me to him. “ Come here, Amara. While Joe gathers herself, I’m going to tell you about my history with her.”

  “I’m not sure I want to hear it, Callon. I’ve warned you about this.”

  “I know. You’re jealous, and that’s ok. But I think you will feel much better about this once you hear the real story.”

  I walked past Joe to face him while he took two mugs out of the cupboard and filled them with coffee before handing one to me. “I did have a sexual encounter with Jophiel. I have explained to you that prior to my bonding with you, my sexual urges were sated in the human realm, correct?”

  “Yes,” I responded through gritted teeth. This wasn’t as pleasant as he said it was going to be.

  “She houned me for centuries, wanting a bond. I think she would have settled for anyone, but I would have been the greatest prize, since my power would transfer to her, giving the Light more than sufficient strength to triumph over Dark. When her constant badgering didn’t produce the results she desired, she followed me to a village in Scotland. There, she inhabited a mortal vessel-”

  “She possessed someone?”

  “The Light does not prefer to use that term, but the process is similar. In her borrowed form, she sought my attention and I unknowingly fell for her ruse.”

  “You’re telling me she tricked you into having sex with her because you thought she was a mortal woman? So why are you not bonded with her?”

  “We did not complete the sexual encounter. Even if we did, the bond would not have taken place. It’s not the act of sex that initiates the bond; it’s the surrender of self to another. You didn’t just have sex with me, Amara. You gave yourself to me, and I to you.”

  I can’t lie and say that thinking of him pleasuring the seething beauty in our kitchen didn’t bother me- it did. But he was right; I felt better about the whole ordeal. It wasn’t like they were in an actual relationship.

  “Now, can we talk about the real issue at hand without you two going at each other?” he asked, although I could still hear the humor in his tone.

  “I’m willing if she is. I would like to know that no problems come to you because of me,” I said, chewing on my bottom lip. “I refuse to be a weakness, Callon. I will earn my place.”

  He embraced me and I breathed in his scent with my forehead pressed against his chest. “Don’t worry, love. I can describe you with many adjectives. Weak will never be one of them. I think you just proved that. You can release her now.”

  That’s where I drew a blank. Shit. I didn’t even know how I did what I did, let alone how to undo it. “Umm...I don’t know how!” I whispered against his chest, unwilling to let the angel see how truly untrained I actually was.

  He chuckled and leaned down to nuzzle my ear. “I got you, babe. She won’t know.”

  I stepped away from him and turned to face Jophiel. I still despised the woman, there was no denying it. But I also realized there was no way to avoid her. We would have to deal with each other on some level or another- for eternity. Starting out with an enemy probably wasn’t the best path to take.

  I was surprised to see a tear tracking its way down her cheek. Her eyes held mine and even though Callon removed whatever magic I managed to place on her, she remained silent. Her gaze moved from me to Callon before she spoke. “I don’t understand, Cal. I mean, you’re an honest and pure man. Why would you do this? Don’t you want goodness to prevail? How can you not want the Light to defeat all that is Dark?”

  “I am unbiased, Joe. I have maintained that stance for centuries. I never choose sides.”

  “But, how? Why? We aren’t evil, we are for love and light!”

  Callon sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. “As they say: ‘absolute power corrupts, absolutely’, Joe. There must always be a Light and a Dark. It is the way all beings, and all realms were created. There will never be a day filled with sunshine that is not followed by the still of night- and they both have a place. We must endeavor to persevere through the dark to appreciate the light- and vice versa. After all this time, how can you not understand that?”

  “That has always been your motto, but I don’t believe it, Callon! I don’t believe the mortals in all the realms would not be better off if we were able to eradicate all evil. It’s so simple! They would live a heaven-like existence with no wars, violence, or terror. Who wouldn’t want that?”

  I could see the angel wasn’t trying to be persuasive, she was genuinely sold on her mission and couldn’t understand Callon’s stance. She was good, and she wanted all others to be, too. Granted, possessing some poor peasant girl to have sex with Death wasn’t necessarily ‘good’, but then again, I bet the gal who reaped the rewards of
the trickery didn’t really mind, if she could remember, that is.

  “I know I’m new to all of this, and you might not understand what I’m going to say, but Callon is right, Jophiel. The design of mankind is not to live a trial-free life. Trust me, I know. In order to appreciate something and truly value it, it must be worked for. Whether that is physical, mental, or emotional labor; it must be earned. I don’t know if that’s how the Beginning meant for it to be, or if it’s how we have evolved, but a day of sunshine and butterflies, day after day, is not sustainable.”

  “Are you saying even if we were to win, we would still lose? Impossible! If we eradicate the Dark, there will be no evil, Amara. It’s pretty simple. Without the Dark, mortals will be incapable of committing the atrocities they do now. They will only be designed to love and live. How can neither of you understand how much better that would be for all?” Jophiel argued, clearly confused and not understanding at all our point of view.

  Callon sat down at the table and pointed to a chair, inviting the distressed angel to take a seat. “Listen, Joe. You might not understand right now, but think about it. And while you’re at it, I need you to consider something else. If the Dark were to fail to exist, what need would there be for the Light?”

  She was quiet for a moment, I could see the wheels turning in her head as she pondered Callon’s question. I saw the dots connect and she jerked her head up to stare wide-eyed at him. “Are you insinuating all of us who are of the Light would be irrelevant? But, we are Light, just as the mortals would be!”

  “Yes, and now, you each have a designed function and duty. You, for example, represent the inner beauty in all mankind and help foster and grow the peace and self-love required for confidence and greatness. When people doubt themselves, you help them see the good around them. You also assist in allowing mortals to see the beauty in others. Tell me, Joe. If there were no Dark forces to make mortals question themselves, see suspicion in others, or suffer with self-worth, what would they need you for?” He asked the question gently and I could see how truly compassionate Callon was- as Death and as a man. He believed in the design as it was, and would do anything he could to preserve it.