by T. Styles
When I was done, I acted like she wasn’t even there. She ran to the sink to wipe off her face and I walked right out the door. It didn’t take her long to come after me.
“Kelsi! Kelsi! Can I come with you?”
“No, bitch. I told you, I’m done with you.”
“You dirty fucking dog!! You would make me suck your dick and carry me.”
“I ain’t make you suck shit. You got on your knees your mothafucking self. I ain’t gonna lie, I lost respect for you after that shit. Do you realize that only five percent of the piss gets in the toilet and the rest hits the floor?” I laughed. “You a nastier bitch than I thought.”
“Kelsi!” She was crying so hard she was really starting to make me wonder why I ever liked her to began with. I mean for real, she ain’t have no heart. I thought she was a ride or die chick. I would have given her some props if she said, “FUCK YOU KELSI!” or something. A bitch this weak could get me killed.
She ran up to me and got in front of me. “I can’t live without you, Kelsi,” she cried as she grabbed me.
Well die, bitch! Do something, anything, but please get the fuck out my face.”
For some reason I felt like I ain’t never have any feelings for her anymore. Whenever I felt sorry for her, I thought about her doing the same things we did with Bricks. If she was that quick to suck my dick on the bathroom floor who knows what else she might do with him or any of these other niggas in this mothafucka.
Just then my phone rang, “Yeah. I’m coming out now.”
When Keisha saw Kenosha’s Benz pull up, she fell down, grabbed my leg and started crying. I kicked her off and started walking away. I was almost to the car until she said, “It was your mother! It was her fault!”
Hold up! What was this bitch gonna say about my mother? Was I gonna have to kill her ass? I walked up to her and grabbed her hair. Kenosha got out the car like she was getting ready to do something.
“Do I look like I need your help?” I yelled at Kenosha. She shook her head no. “So get back in the fucking car.”
When she did, I directed my attention back to the slut who, in one second, was getting ready to have a broken neck if she said the wrong thing.
“What did you say about my mother, bitch?”
“Your mother, Kelsi!” Her speech was fucked up because she was crying and trying to catch her breath.
“What the fuck did you just say about my mother?”
I didn’t care. That slut ain’t deserve to breathe my mother’s name let alone say it. I started to think about all the things my mother did for me and how this slut, after one argument betrayed me, and I slapped the shit out of her. She fell to the ground trying to get away from me. I caught up with her ass and slapped her again.
“Please, Kelsi! Please, I’m sorry,” she said as she tried to run back into the building on her knees.
I caught up with her and with visions in my head of her fucking Bricks and thinking about her disrespecting my mother, I beat her ass in the front of Bladensburg High school. When I was tired I lifted her head by the hair, her face was drenched in blood and I said, “Were you saying something about my mother, bitch?”
“No, Kelsi no please no more.” She cried as she laid her face in the grass. “I thought you said you’d never hurt me, Kelsi!” she repeated over and over. “I thought you said you would never hurt me.”
“I said I’d never hurt my girl, but I could care less about a slut,” I said as I let her go and left her right there in front of the school as I rolled out with Kenosha.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
SEPTEMBER 30th
FRIDAY, 9:47PM
KELSI
Where the fuck is moms at? Something ain’t right. I ain’t feeling this shit and I know in my heart, something’s wrong. We went over the plan a million times last night. She would get in contact with Lorenzo, tell him she was thinking ‘bout letting me slide at his place from now on and then we would all meet me out here so we could handle our biz. So where was she at now?
When I looked down at my phone I noticed Bricks called me six times. All that did was irritate me. There’s nothing like waiting for somebody else to call, having your phone ring and it be somebody else. Anyway I didn’t know what I planned to do with him yet. It was still to be determined, but if he called during the same time my moms did and she wasn’t able to reach me, that would be another reason for me to hate his ass. He called six times and ain’t leave a message until the last time. I wasn’t trying to hear shit he had to say, but I needed to listen to something because thoughts in my head about what was going on with her started to drive me crazy.
I called my voicemail and I heard him say, “Man this Bricks. You need to get up with me for real. Keisha telling me your moms got me mixed up in some shit I ain’t have nothing to do with. I need to clear my name with you and I want to do that shit in person. I ain’t the one to do you cruddy man and I ain’t about to start now. I know this a misunderstanding so get at me.”
What the fuck was he talking about? He was probably tryna cop a plea and what was Keisha talking ‘bout? Damn that bitch was crazier than I thought. She trying to put my moms in the mix on whatever shit she got going on with Bricks but I ain’t having it. I shoulda did everybody a favor and let Charles keep that bitch.
When I looked down at my watch and saw she ain’t called me yet, I was getting more and more noid. A half an hour passed since she said she would be here with Lorenzo and nothing. Maybe he found out we were trying to set him up! Shit! But how could he know that? It doesn’t make any sense!
But how come she wasn’t at Haines Point where she was supposed to be? My legs were shaking and my head was beating like a drum. I looked like I was on that shit. I shoulda walked up to his ass, blasted his head off and left my moms out of it. The plan was supposed to be simple, murder his ass, throw him in the Potomac and cash in on his million-dollar life insurance policy. If he fucked with my moms I’m telling you, I’ma do him worse than Charles and Delonte combined.
“God, I haven’t prayed to you in a while and for real, I felt I wasn’t worthy. But you can’t take her from me now, I know you know that. I read the Bible and I know that some of the greatest battles ended in bloodshed and for a good purpose. Please let me handle this and I promise that I’ll never murder again, at least I’ll try not to.”
I was sitting in another rental when I noticed a familiar pair of headlights and one was cracked. It looked like the same car I’d seen at school sometimes coming to pick up Keisha but what the fuck was it doing here? When I saw Sparkle’s car pull up beside me, I ducked down in my seat. I ain’t have no time to be kicking it with her cackling ass. What I saw in Sparkle’s car made me reach for my piece because it wasn’t her. Instead it was one of the maddest bitches I seen in a long time and she was looking dead at me.
She parked the car on the right of mine, so I couldn’t drive away. There was a car in front of me, in the back and now hers on the right. The railing was on the left so there was no place to drive. I was blocked. If my moms called me right now saying she needed me, I couldn’t move and that made me want to slap her ass all over again.
“So you wanna carry me and shit? That’s how you wanna carry shit, Kelsi?”
“What the fuck you talking about, bitch? And what in the fuck are you doing here?”
“I’m talking about your smack party you had on my face and how you rolled out with that bitch.”
“I told you it was over, bitch so why are you here?” I got out the car and approached her.
“I followed your ass and was waiting for your little princess to show up. I got tired of waiting and decided to pull up on you cuz I know what goes on at the Point. My moms used to play this spot all the time. Don’t nothing go on here but a bunch of fucking, so where she at, Kelsi? She realized you weak as all get out and left you stranded?” She laughed.
“Keisha, get the fuck out of here! Now is not the time, I’m telling you!”
“Kelsi
, why don’t you love me no more?”
I can’t believe this shit! Are you serious! You pick now to come up here and talk to me about some bullshit?” I said with both of my hands on my head. I couldn’t believe Keisha was going out like this.
“Why in the fuck are you doing me like this, Kelsi! Tell me that?”
“It’s over! I’m feeling somebody else!”
“Who Ke-no-show? Where she at, Kelsi? I was waiting for her too so I could fuck her up! If she think she gonna get my man she got another thing coming.”
“Get the fuck outta here with that bamma ass shit! I’m done with you, slut!”
“And I’m done with you. Your dick some garbage anyway!”
I looked around and was glad there wasn’t anybody around us. That’s why we chose the Point to begin with. My moms said it used to be jumping all the time and at one point, you couldn’t even ride through let alone park a car but now it was isolated and quiet. That was, until this bitch showed up and started wilding out.
“Yeah right, bitch! My dick some garbage huh? That’s why you following me around and shit? Keisha, for real you betta get the fuck outta here before I –”
“Before you what, Kelsi? Before you fuck me up? I don’t give a fuck no more! I did what your moms told me to do and I lost my man. As far as I’m concerned it’s that bitch’s fault not mine.”
Bang Bang Bang! She was already down but I shot her again. Bang! Killing her was the easiest. All this shit was that bitch’s fault! Charles was after me because of her, we had to kill Delonte because he knew about it and now my moms was missing. Bang! If I never met her I wouldn’t have to do any of this shit.
Damn! I got to get rid of her body. I picked her up and pulled her toward the water but she was still moving. I got up on her head.
Bang!
She wasn’t moving no more. I ain’t see nobody near me and so far, it looked like only the water was a witness, so I gave her to it.
Swish.
When I ran back to the car I realized I was still blocked in Just because I killed her didn’t mean I got rid of the problem. And her keys, where in the fuck were her keys? I looked in the car and they weren’t there. I looked on the ground and they weren’t there. Then I remembered that bitch put ‘em in her pocket and now the keys were at the bottom of the Potomac. Oh snap! Now the rental car was gonna stay blocked with Sparkle’s shit. I ain’t know what the fuck I was gonna do now.
I called my moms over twenty times and she ain’t answer her phone and I knew I couldn’t stay around here any longer. Shit was too hot for me here. Although I ain’t think nobody saw me shoot her, there was always a nigga in the corner watching. Remember, the streets are always watching, Kelsi. Damn!
Where’s my moms?
I decided to start walking and hit up Kenosha for a ride. I had to help my moms before things got out of hand. I was positive that, something was wrong. But I wasn’t saying it out loud. If I said it out loud, I would have to admit it and I didn’t know what that meant.
The phone rang a few times before she finally answered it, “Hello, Kelsi.” Her voice sounded different than it had in the past. “Where are you?”
“Ummm, I need a ride. I’m at the Point. Can you slide through and pick me up? I’m by the statue of the man coming out the ground.” I was amped, nervous and worried. Now I realized that the triangle of emotions I was feeling was a deadly combination.
“I’ll be there the moment I get through with matters here.” Click.
There was something in Kenosha’s voice that sounded cold as shit. For one thing, she wasn’t sounding all ghetto and dragging out sentences and she wasn’t excited to hear from me like she was earlier. Everything about tonight was different and I was starting to get noid. As long as my moms was safe, I could still do what needed to be done but if she wasn’t, I ain’t know what I was capable of.
“Mama if you can hear me I love you. I need you to know I love you,” I said as I dropped to my knees and realized my worst nightmares were coming true.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
SEPTEMBER 30th
FRIDAY, 10:40PM
JANET
“Mama if you can hear me I love you. I need you to know I love you.” I thought I was dreaming when I heard Kelsi’s voice. That was until I woke up. I wonder if this is what Delonte meant when he said there’s something I have to tell you. Maybe dead men don’t tell lies. My eyes were swollen shut. I can barely see through one of them and I only try to open the other when I hear him talking to me. It hurts too much otherwise. I was sitting on a cold floor with nothing on but my bra and panties. My back was up against a pole and my hands were tied behind my back.
Once again I’d been taken away from my home and I still wasn’t sure how he got in. It was as smooth as if he lived there. The last thing I remember was preparing to meet Lorenzo, so Kelsi and I could handle business. The next thing I know, I was being forced into a scenario I hadn’t planned for. A scenario I hadn’t planned for. That sounds so weird because I plan for everything. I try to teach Kelsi to plan for every possible scenario too, but never in my wildest dreams did I see this one coming.
Kelsi, I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry for this life I’ve gotten you into. Please forgive me. I wish you could hear me. I feel your love. Can you feel mine?
“Helena Hope, you ready to die?” He interrupted me from my thoughts.
“Yes,” I said trying to form full sentences even though my lips were split and twice their size due to him constantly punching me. “Please don’t hurt my son. He ain’t have shit to do with this.”
“I know he didn’t. This all you, Helena. You should’ve stayed out the game. I tried to warn you but you didn’t listen.”
“But he was blackmailing my son! I had to fucking kill him!”
“Blackmailing him for what? You lied to me, Helena! You told me he was blackmailing him to fuck with my product. You knew how I felt about that shit! But it wasn’t true was it? He was blackmailing him because he knew he killed that dude.”
“He didn’t kill him. I did.” I was spitting up blood and my stomach hurt because he used it as a punching bag. Getting punched in the stomach and hit in the eyes were pains I could do without and he did both of them over and over again.
“You lying but it’s cool. I’m not the fucking cops but you should know that all of this is your fault.”
“I know, oh God I know,” I said crying so hard every muscle in my body ached. “And I’m ready to accept my fate. All I ask is that you spare Kelsi’s life.”
“But, Helena, it’s been about Kelsi all along.”
He was calling me by my alias trying to remind me of my past but lately I thought about it everyday.
“I don’t get it. What do you mean it’s all about Kelsi?”
“I mean, the night I saved you, I knew exactly who you were but you didn’t remember me. Maybe if you weren’t so scared you would have. I don’t know and to be honest, I don’t give a fuck,” he said as he circled around the pole I was tied against. His voice sounding like surround sound speakers that ripped through me.
“There was a party one night that you and your man gave. You were supposed to make all of his associates feel comfortable. You were so high that night that honestly I didn’t know it was possible. Popping those E pills had you fucked up. Anyway, you all high and shit, took one look at me and said, “I ain’t fucking that black mothafucka. I can’t even see him.” You thought you were hilarious. My friends laughing, and Jarvis’ friends laughing. I was the butt end of your mothafucking joke!
I was trying to remember that night but I couldn’t. Maybe he had me confused with someone else and this was all a mistake. Please God let it be a mistake.
“Maybe it wasn’t me because I honestly can’t remember.”
“Shut the fuck up and listen! That’s your problem, you wanna be a man so much you love disrespecting one. Well I’m not Jarvis, bitch.”
I was so scared that I couldn’t move. The war
mth that came down my leg felt comforting at first and then it started to run cold. Here I was, on the floor, sitting in my own piss, realizing I was about to die. To top it off, I had to worry about Kelsi being unsafe. I wish it was a way to tell him how much I loved him. I wish it was a way to tell him how proud he made me. But in my heart, I felt he’d never know. I kept many journals when I stayed with Jarvis and one at the apartment in Maryland. I wanted him to have them because I talked so much about him. I’m sure Skully would never give him anything from the apartment.
“Like I said, you said to me, “I ain’t fucking with that nigga!” See, I wasn’t worried ‘bout it for real. You had already fucked five dudes that night and I wasn’t feeling like standing in line to be number six. Still, I ain’t appreciate how you played me in front of my boys and I ain’t appreciate how Jarvis ain’t put you in your place, but I didn’t expect him to because I never liked that nigga. Anyway, I was going to the bathroom and went to Kelsi’s room by mistake.”
“Lil shawty looked right at me and said, ‘What up, nigga!’ I kicked it in his room for a minute just shooting the shit. He had a personality. I thought about the kind of person you were and how you had him around all that shit, so I made a pact with him. I told him just as long as I’m alive, he’d be safe. You know what he told me? ‘Just as long as I’m alive you’ll be safe too.’ “You think he’ll keep his promise now?”
Silence.
“Anyway, he said it with passion in his voice and everything! So when I saw you all fucked up that night, similar to what you look like now, I saw an opportunity to make good on my promise. I mean, its not his fault his mother’s a whore. I figured he was somewhere by himself that night and I needed you to go get him. I just didn’t know where he was. Trust me, I would have killed your sneaky ass myself that night.”
