One Last Risk

by Nancy Stopper

  Jessica held an arm out and together they walked up the steps.

  “Welcome home.” Jessica opened the door and held it so Sarah could enter, then trailed behind, dragging Nicky along. Lily and Nicky ran down the hall to Lily’s room.

  “What can I do to help you get settled?”

  “You’ve done so much already. I can’t ask any more of you.” As soon as Jessica left, Sarah planned to sink into the couch and not come up for air for a week. Maybe longer. But of course, she couldn’t do that—she had Lily to look after. At times like this, she missed Alex even more.

  “Yes, you can. That’s what sisters are for. Now sit down and I’ll get you something to drink.”

  “That I can do.”

  Sarah slid onto the couch, swiveled her body and laid her feet down the length of the cushions. She settled against the arm, relaxing her back and shoulders. Just that little motion sent sharp, shooting pains across her gut and up her back. She sighed and sank into the cushion.

  Jessica yelled from the kitchen. “I’m just thankful your friend Lucas called. I was nearly out of my mind with worry.”

  “He’s not my friend,” Sarah muttered under her breath. She didn’t know how to describe the relationship yet. It wasn’t even a relationship. She met him, flirted a little, badly at that, and then next thing she knew, he was pulling her out of her crumpled vehicle. And then he stayed at the hospital with her.

  Her gaze shot to the mantle and the picture proudly displayed there. Her wedding picture—she and Alex. Huge smiles graced both of their faces. Alex looked down to her with love, and her hand rested gently on his arm. The tender moment had been unscripted and captured perfectly by the photographer. Alex was the man she was meant to be with, the one she planned to spend the rest of her life with. ‘Till death do you part—yeah, well, they had the death part covered.

  “What did you say?” Jessica yelled.

  “Nothing.”

  Lucas and Alex. One here, the other gone. One in her past, and one could be her future. She’d moved to Oak Grove to start a new life for herself and Lily. To leave the memories of Alex behind. She’d barely gotten settled and then this accident happened. It was too much, too soon.

  Lucas had stayed by her side the entire time, even sleeping in her hospital room so she wouldn’t be alone when she woke up. He’d even called her sister. What kind of man did that? An interested one, for sure. But she couldn’t be attracted to him already, could she?

  “At least you weren’t alone.” Jessica sat beside her and placed her hand on Sarah’s arm. “You want to tell me about him?”

  “It’s crazy. I told you I met him in the coffee shop after I dropped Lily off at preschool. I just stood there like an idiot. But I couldn’t stop staring at him. He’s unbelievably sexy. But to see him when I woke up… How crazy is that? I can’t believe he was the paramedic.”

  “I’m just glad it was him. And as far as you’re concerned, it’s about time.”

  “I don’t know about that. I just met him.”

  “You’ve got to start somewhere, don’t you? You moved here to start a new life for you and Lily. Don’t you think that means being open to a potential relationship? I don’t think, for one minute, that Alex would want you to be alone for the rest of your life. He’d want Lily to have a father, and he’d want you to fall in love again.”

  Sarah sighed. They’d had this conversation several times. Jessica, and everyone else, had told Sarah she had mourned long enough. They didn’t know, couldn’t understand, what it was like to have half of your heart ripped out of your chest while the rest was left beating. But, she hadn’t thought of Alex in several days, her mind focused on Lucas and his presence after her accident. Guilt overwhelmed her. She moved to Oak Grove to start a new life, sure, but that didn’t mean shoving Alex aside, did it?

  “Is he single?”

  “What, huh?” A lump clogged her throat and tears pooled in her eyes. She swiped at them, frustrated with her own confusion. She was twenty-eight years old, dammit, not seventy-eight. She was not ready to lay down and pull the dirt over her head just yet. “I guess. I don’t remember a ring. But you can never tell with guys.”

  “You haven’t checked him out online. Oh, honey, I think I need to stay here and help you research the man candy of Oak Grove.”

  “Very funny, Jessica.”

  “I’m just saying.”

  Before Lucas had left her hospital room, he’d mentioned adding himself into her phone. After he left, she’d spent an hour staring at his name and number. She could have clicked onto Facebook or Twitter to check him out, could have Googled him. But all she had to do was tap the screen and call him. If she were crazy enough to press the buttons, he’d be here in no time. She knew it as sure as she knew anything.

  “Hello… Sarah?” Jessica waved her hand in front of her face.

  “Sorry, what did you say?”

  “I said I stocked your freezer before I picked you up. Your meds are on the counter in the kitchen. Can I get you anything else?”

  “No, really. You’ve been great. I think I’m going to lie here and take a nap.”

  “Well, Nicky and I will get out of your hair, then.” She turned and yelled down the hall. “Nicky, Lily.”

  Two pairs of little feet padded down the hall.

  “Nicky. It’s time to go.”

  He sagged, his arms dragging at his sides. “Aw, Mommy.”

  “Don’t ‘Aw, Mommy’ me. Shoes. Now. Lily, honey, remember what I told you. You have to be Mommy’s helper this week. She’s going to need to nap and you have to be quiet.”

  “Okay, Aunt Jessica.” Lily wrapped her arms around Jessica.

  Tears filled Sarah’s eyes as she gave a silent thanks to have her family around her at times like this.

  “Call me later.” Jessica kissed the top of Lily’s head. “I don’t want to bother you if you’re asleep.”

  “I will.”

  Jessica scooped Nicky up and headed out the door, closing it behind her. For the first time since her accident, Sarah was alone with Lily. And her mind wouldn’t shut off… thanks to one persistent paramedic.

  “Are you okay, Mommy?” Lily stood in front of the sofa. Her big eyes that resembled Alex’s were filled with questions.

  Sarah patted the couch. “Climb on up here, baby. Just be careful, okay?”

  Lily climbed onto the couch and lay down. Sarah wrapped her arm around her precious daughter. Her other hand grasped the necklace that hung around her neck, both of her connections to Alex close. Thank God Lily hadn’t been in the car.

  Chapter Nine

  LUCAS PULLED UP to the curb in front of his parents’ house on the outskirts of Oak Grove a week later. His brothers, Michael and Joey, were already there, shooting baskets with their father on the makeshift basketball court he’d built them in elementary school. The scent of mums filled the air, his mother’s pride and joy, the deeply-colored flowers a reminder of fall and bonfires and snuggling with girlfriend’s past. The grass was well-groomed now, but three boys and many pickup football games with friends in the yard meant a trampled yard while he was growing up. Coming home always reminded him of his childhood, when his life was simpler and he wasn’t mired down with grief and guilt.

  Lucas climbed from his truck and headed toward the garage. Since the game was in full swing, his brothers and father didn’t notice him approach, nor steal a pass between Michael and Dad.

  “What the—” Dad whipped his head around.

  Lucas waved bye-bye and dribbled away with the ball. He pulled up to shoot a perfect jump shot. “Sorry, I’m late. Yes!”

  He gave his brothers quick high fives.

  “Lucky shot,” Michael said.

  Michael’s response didn’t surprise Lucas. There was a lot of love behind that simple statement, a regular mantra during the many hours they spent on this very basketball court. Michael couldn’t make it every Sunday, his eighty-hours-a-week job at the law firm in Philly keeping hi
m trapped in the city. But he appeared happy with his life, his fancy car, his serial monogamy. He hoped to make partner by the time he was twenty-eight, and with two years left before that self-imposed deadline, he was well on his way.

  Joey slapped Lucas on the back. “Good to see you, bro. It’s been a while. You haven’t been in this week.”

  “Yeah, been busy.” Lucas man-hugged his youngest brother. He hadn’t seen Joey since he stopped at J.J.’s the day he met Sarah. Joey had been head-down in plans to expand his bar and add a dance floor. Lucas couldn’t be prouder that Joey had taken on a run-down biker bar and turned it into a great family-friendly restaurant and after-hours night spot.

  “I’m so happy to have all my boys here today,” Dad added as he wrapped his arm around Joey’s shoulder.

  Lucas scanned the backyard. “Where’s Rachel?” If she were here, she’d be mixing it up with her big brothers for sure.

  “She couldn’t make it,” Joey said.

  Joey’s words sounded light but his look said something else. The three brothers exchanged glances. Rachel hadn’t joined them for Sunday dinner recently. As a matter of fact, she had pulled away from the entire family over the past few months. But as the youngest, she was the last to find her way in the world. She’d been struggling recently and facing some difficulties she hadn’t shared with the rest of the family.

  Lucas eyed Joey. If she confided in anyone, it would be him. “Have you talked to her?”

  “Earlier this week. She covered a couple of shifts at the bar. But that’s it.”

  Lucas didn’t press Joey further. Each of them carried their own demons in life, and each did so in their own way. Rachel withdrew into herself and away from those that loved her the most while Lucas wrestled his demons by fighting fires and keeping his crew safe. Except he wasn’t doing that very well right now, either. How could he protect the crew when he couldn’t even suit up?

  “Are you boys ready to eat?” Ma yelled from the back door. “Oh, Lucas. I didn’t hear you pull up.”

  Lucas rushed over and wrapped his arms around Ma and buzzed her cheek. Nothing like a hug from your mother to remind you what’s important in life. “Sorry I’m late, Ma. Been a busy week.”

  “I’m sure. You want to tell me about it?”

  If he’d heard that question once, he’d heard it a thousand times. Maybe he’d tell her about Sarah, test the waters and see what his mother thought. Maybe that’s why he relented and had come today when he’d have much rather stayed away from the prying eyes of his brothers. He’d never admit he needed his mom, but he did. She knew how he suffered over Shawn’s death, witnessed Regena’s grieving. She was the one person who understood what he was feeling.

  He’d always felt comfortable talking to his mother. She could tell when he had something on his mind, and today was no different.

  “There’s this woman…”

  His dad and brothers jogged into the house behind him, nudging and jostling each other.

  Ma patted him on the shoulder, a promising look in her eye. Damn, his brothers for interrupting them. “Maybe later.”

  A few serving dishes already sat on the long kitchen table and the scents of roasted chicken, potatoes, and green beans wafted through the air. His mouth watered and warmth flowed through his heart. He scanned the kitchen. Their home reflected Ma, through and through. And few things had changed over the years. Her decorative canning jars lined the windows, the colorful light reflecting on the ceiling. He spent many happy hours beside his mother, standing on a chair with his sleeves rolled up while they canned the many fruits and vegetables grown in her backyard garden.

  Ma hurried to the counter, finishing up some last-minute dinner preparations, her ever-present outrageous apron wrapped around her waist. Something to make them laugh. Today’s was no exception. “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy cupcakes, and that’s kind of the same thing.”

  Emma would appreciate that apron. Maybe he’d ask Ma where she bought it, or track it down himself and buy one for Emma. Ma made it look so easy, raising four kids, but he knew better. Each of them had driven their mother to tears on more than one occasion.

  Sarah probably felt the same about Lily. Her panic when she woke up indicated as much.

  Lucas hadn’t been able to swing back around by the hospital before she’d been discharged. More than once over the past week, he’d put the keys in the ignition and turned toward her street. But he stopped himself. She intrigued him, he wouldn’t deny that. But he couldn’t start a relationship with anyone, certainly not a single mother. But that didn’t stop her from invading his dreams. Each time he closed his eyes, hers were the ones staring back at him.

  Ma shot him a knowing look. She wouldn’t let him leave before he told her what was going on.

  He and his brothers took their regular seats at the table, Rachel’s seat noticeably empty. None of them asked again about her absence, but every eye at the table lingered on her empty chair.

  Despite Rachel’s absence, the dinner conversation rose to a high decibel in no time. No matter who came each week, the family fell into comfortable, cheerful camaraderie. Sure, he’d contemplated skipping today, but he belonged here, needed to be here with his family. They didn’t judge him for his guilt, they just didn’t understand it. Sunday dinner with his parents had been a tradition for as long as he could remember. Whoever was available would be sitting at their parents’ table every Sunday. So regardless of his deep desire to pull the covers over his head and shut out the world, he’d pulled himself up and over to dinner.

  They talked over each other, several animated conversations bouncing around at once. Many a high school friend left exhausted from trying to keep up with the lively Bennett dinner discussions.

  Finally, Ma’s voice rang out loudly over the din produced by Dad, Joey, and Michael. “I hear you had some excitement this week at work, Lucas.”

  What did she know? Sure, Oak Grove was a small town and with it, had its fair share of gossip. But he wasn’t about to tell her about his suspension if she didn’t already know. He’d called her briefly after the fire, just to check in, but hadn’t shared the details.

  “Yeah, Lucas. Tell us about the beautiful woman you rescued,” Joey teased. Nothing ever fazed him. Steering the conversation to Sarah suited Lucas just fine, though. That way he didn’t have to talk about his suspension.

  “It was a bit crazy. We were called to an MVA out on Old Mill Road during that huge storm. There was an injured woman in the front seat of one of the vehicles. Turns out I’d met her already. She’s new in town and has a daughter.”

  Ma gasped, her mouth gaped in an O. “Oh dear. Was her daughter in the car with her?”

  “No, thankfully. Extracting Sarah was bad enough. I couldn’t imagine how bad it could have been had her daughter been there, too. She’d slammed into a tree and all of the bags had deployed.”

  Ma’s voice softened. “That sounds pretty scary.”

  “Yeah, but she stayed strong the entire time we extracted her. And even later, when she came to at the hospital. I’m not sure I would have been as composed.”

  “Jake told me the woman is single… and quite pretty,” Joey added with a nudge and a wink toward Lucas. Leave it to Joey to focus on her looks instead of what happened. “And big brother here stayed at the hospital with her. All night.”

  Four heads snapped in his direction. Great, now he had everyone’s attention. Not the way he wanted to discuss his conflicted feelings over Sarah. “That’s what I understand. The single part.” Lucas chose not to comment on how Sarah looked… because he hadn’t been able to get her silky blonde hair and piercing blue eyes out of his mind since the day they met.

  “How are things down at J.J.’s?” If Lucas could just shift the conversation to his little brother, Joey would talk about his favorite topic—himself.

  “Things are good. I’m working on plans to add a stage for live music and expand to a full-size dance floor.”


  “Sounds great, Joseph,” his dad said.

  Lucas wasn’t surprised at his parents’ unwavering support. Growing up, their parents always talked through important decisions with them. Even now, Joey had likely discussed the pros and cons of expansion with their father and made this decision well-informed.

  “I’ll be happy to review any contracts you need drawn up,” Michael added through a mouthful of roasted potatoes. Despite being overworked, he likely wouldn’t charge Joey a penny for reviewing his contracts, no matter how much Joey objected. That’s what family did. At least his family.

  His mother waved her fork at his brother. “Don’t talk with your mouth full, Michael.”

  “Yes, Ma.” Michael lowered his head and the rest of the table laughed.

  “Sounds great, Joey. Can’t wait to see it,” Lucas added.

  “Yeah, like you would ever be caught dead on my dance floor. I think the closest you’ve ever gotten is the end of the bar.”

  “Now, Joey, lay off your brother. You each have your own strengths. Maybe Lucas’s isn’t dancing.”

  “Alright, Ma,” Joey whined, but he threw a wink Lucas’s way. Joey wasn’t done with that part of the conversation. Lucas just had to wait for the other shoe to drop.

  Lucas shoved another bite of chicken into his mouth. Maybe if he just sat here quietly, they’d turn their attention to Joey or Michael. Joey was right, to an extent. Lucas usually didn’t dance when he went to J.J.’s. Mainly because he didn’t want to lead anyone on. And he hadn’t been interested in dating seriously in a long time.

  Why then did he picture Sarah, her hips moving to the thumping beat of the music? Was he really considering dating her? He couldn’t be more wrong for her at this point in his life—in her life.

  Thankfully, the conversation shifted from him and wove its way through sports and the weather and any number of other topics by the time they finished eating. Lucas finally laid his fork down. He’d made it through dinner with only a little grilling from his well-meaning family, but if he hung around much longer, he didn’t know if he could keep from blurting out exactly how much he’d been thinking about Sarah.