Don't Close Your Eyes

by Lynessa James

  We talked for almost an hour, and I managed to only mention her brother once when I brought up that Keane had apparently moved in with him. She confirmed he was here to stay and talked about what a stand up guy he was. She agreed that he was really good looking, but she also said she felt like she may as well be talking about Jase when she spoke of Keane. They were like brother and sister, too. I hung up with her and decided to be lame and go to bed at only ten thirty.

  The next day I had an early study group to get with, so I missed out on my run. Which also meant missing out on my eye candy. At practice the coach got onto me for not staying focused. He reamed my butt in front of everyone and made me run an extra mile since our second fastest girl, Julie, had been able to keep up with me the whole time. It wasn’t because she had gotten faster either. I had to throw up afterward. It was embarrassing.

  I was looking forward to work tonight, at least. Monday was Alternative Rock, and I loved it. I drove home with plenty of time, so I went and kissed my parents and told them about my awful practice. My dad asked me about my stupid grin when I told him I had to get ready for work. Dang it! I was exposed. I claimed it was nothing.

  “Right…” he said knowingly. He smiled and kissed me, reminding me to have a good night and to be safe. I agreed and bounded outside to my garage apartment stairs and ran inside. I showered and dried my hair and even straightened it. I was determined to leave it down. I sprayed my perfume and put on a little more makeup than normal. I wanted to look as pretty as I wanted to feel. My copper hair fell in long razored layers around my face and down my back, and I put some product in to accentuate the texture. I may be a tomboy by nature, but by no means was I incapable of being girly. I knew how to bring the shit. Pardon my French.

  I shrugged into my uniform and tied my little apron across my lap. I checked my reflection in my full length mirror in my hallway. My legs looked amazing. I could tell that I had been working them out more than normal. They were lean and pretty even for my being such a short girl. My whole body was lean and my arms looked really good in the A frame tank I was wearing. It wasn’t necessary, but I wanted to wear it tonight. It was almost four, and my shift began at four-thirty. I listened to Tim McGraw’s “It’s Your Love” on my way to work and replayed it. I am a romantic by nature, though I don’t always let it show, and I was currently in a very sweet mood. I sang loudly with my iPod coming through my speakers, though I am no Jase in that department. In the privacy of my own car I could pretend to sound just as beautiful as Faith Hill. I smiled at the thought and belted out some more lyrics while I pulled into my spot. I saw Jase’s truck down a few spots from mine, and I did an inner happy dance. I still had fifteen minutes before my shift began, so I popped my earbuds in and re-listened to it while I tried my best not to sing as I walked in and put my stuff in my locker.

  I walked out to the bar and pretended I was in my own world so I wouldn’t let Jase know that I was super freakin’ excited to see him. I focused on helping Kayleigh, and she widened her eyes as I accidentally sang loudly. We both busted out laughing, doubled over. Yeah, it’s that bad, I don’t care what my friend Nell tells me. Nell has a theory that anyone can sing if shown how to properly and finds the right song. She has yet to make a believer out of me, though she claims my voice has a throaty quality to it on lower songs.

  Kay tossed me a towel and had me dry some glasses, and I handed them back to her as she reached and hung them up. Tom appeared and pointed to my earbuds, then his watch. I nodded and pulled them as the song was ending. I stashed my iPod under the bar and went and clocked in officially. I made some rounds while new patrons began to arrive. I smiled easily and made small talk openly. I received several compliments on my hair and how pretty I looked tonight. It helped put that same spring in my step. Jase, Keane, and a bass player I had not met were up onstage talking. Mel, the badass drummer, was being served a beer right now by Kayleigh, and he was chatting her up shamelessly. I heard them begin sound check, and soon it was time for the five minute call.

  I loaded drinks onto Kayleigh’s tray as fast as I could make them. The bartenders and I served people constantly at the bar while the band began their first couple of songs. The music was good. Very good. I wanted to enjoy it more, but the bar was getting very crowded. Kayleigh came to give me some reprieve, and soon we switched so I could go out on the floor and serve tables. I go a little stir crazy if I don’t get to move about much.

  As I mentioned before, Jase was very good at Seether since he sounded almost exactly like the lead, and I just happened to be a huge fan. Needless to say when he did any of their songs I was blissfully happy. He began “Six Gun Quota,” and the bar was alive with drinks and very generous tippers. I would have to thank the band later. I looked up at the stage and watched as he hugged that mic with his mouth and played his guitar next to Keane who would join in on the vocals every now and again, but mainly played the main guitar. He was good, and he caught my eye and smiled. I bit my lip as I gave him a huge smile in return. I refocused my attention on the drinks I was passing out at an overly crowded table near the stage, the best table in the place when you were a fan of the band onstage. This was a coveted table, not easily obtained unless you had an in with the lead. Since they must’ve been Jase’s friends, I was extra nice.

  When I heard the beginning strums and chords to Five Finger Death Punch’s version of “Bad Company” I had to turn away and exhale. Damn! Do you think it’s possible for music to light you up inside? That is how I felt right now. I loaded another tray for another table close to the stage and made my way through the thick throng that had gathered in front of the stage to gawk at Jase and the rest of the too hot band. The music was so loud over here, so I had to shout to see whose drink was whose. A guy handed me a twenty and told me to keep it.

  “I can’t accept this!” I smiled brightly. He nodded with a smile even as I shook my head.

  “You must, it’s not for anyone but you,” he yelled back. I knit my brow in confusion. He flipped it, and it had his number on the back. I bit my lip and blushed as he put it into my hand, insisting I call him. I turned around and caught Jase watching me on a quiet part while he and Keane were just playing guitar. He smiled at me, then slammed the chords along with Keane and came back to the mic dramatically hitting that song home. I waited nearby so when he finished I handed a glass of water up to him. He handed the empty glass back to me, then I handed him a beer as Keane and Mel and other guy began to play the chords to “Its Been A While.” He quickly handed the bottle back down to me and thanked me. He put his mouth to the mic and sang with that scratchy voice as his eyes closed. He quit playing the guitar and held onto the mic with both hands as he poured himself into that song. So hot… Sigh…

  Offspring was next, and I felt myself fall into rhythm with that quick beat while those around me rocked out happily. I wanted so badly to join them. Instead, I hustled my orders and swapped with Kayleigh to make drinks as fast as I could pour them, all of us working around one another as the bar filled. The tips poured in, and the crowd was very animated to the point that I could tell this was the beginning of the season, even if spring break had until Friday to begin. It was in the air, and the crowd was out to play tonight. The guys were like little boys onstage, and it was endearing as hell. You could tell that for Jase it was a hobby that he was lucky to make money with. Their vibe gave the whole bar a really fun atmosphere that was contagious. A lot of guys bought me drinks that there was no way I could drink. Our manager doesn’t mind us drinking as long as we don’t get tanked and someone else is buying. In fact, we are told not to be rude and to adopt that half empty beer bottle for anyone that might seem offended if we refuse.

  When the guys announced that they were taking a break, I loaded them a tray full of their drinks and sent it to them with Kayleigh. I was too busy to be bummed about it. I got an order for two shots and two beers a few minutes later. “That’s fine, what kind of shots?” I yelled back without turning.r />
  “Vodka, please. Absolut.”

  “Beer?” I asked and turned around. Jase was leaning over the bar and had about a ton of people patting him on the back and singing his praises. I beamed at him and pulled the beer I knew he drank. There was no way anyone was going to allow him or anyone else in the band to pay for drinks, so I held his drinks up for display, announcing who they were for, and allowed them to compete for who got to pay for them. After randomly selecting some winners, I took money from some eager women down at the end for Jase’s drinks, glancing up to see Tom speaking to some guy in the hallway that I’d not seen before, though something about him screamed familiar. Perhaps a customer at some point or another? I went back down to Jase who nodded his thanks to the ladies and turned back to me.

  “Hey, Johnny, get your ass over here, and let her take a break, please?” Jase yelled down at him. Johnny laughingly complied while Jase ordered me a shot of rum, making sure I drank it in front of him. He tugged my hand so that I was leaning across the bar toward him. I laughed and rolled my eyes.

  “Hold on, and I will come around, okay?”

  He shook his head at me and stood to his full height, lifting me over the bar effortlessly as I giggled in shock. His entourage cheered him on and talked about what a player he was while giving him pats on the back. They were getting pretty drunk, and they were not being shy with the flirting and dirty comments about me. Yikes. I pursed my lips and widened my eyes as I looked at him in astonishment while he set me down. He laughed, so I did, too. Not like Jase would let anything happen to me no matter how lewd those guys got, so no harm, no foul.

  He turned me around to put my feet on top of his, where we began to make our way back to the stage while he worked us through the thick crowd, holding my back to him with a strong arm around my waist. I was being felt up right along with him, but it was hard to know exactly who was doing it since the crowd was so thick. Was this what it was like for him all the time? Who the hell cared, all I could truly feel was the heat between where our bodies connected! My heart was fluttering like crazy at being so close to Jase like this!

  He was gracious with his fans and thanked each of them as we walked back to the stage where Keane, new guy that I learned was named Dan, and Mel were chilling. Keane had his arm around a pretty blonde girl’s waist as he sat and drank a beer on the steps. Mel was being fawned all over by three women at once, and he was eating it up. He waved Dan over, who was just as readily received, if not a little shy. I looked back up at Jase. He looked down at me expectantly.

  “Isn’t that usually you? Are you sure you don’t want me to go back to work so you can participate?” I yelled over the cacophony of all the boozers.

  “Are you kidding me? Kinsley, it’s almost like you don’t believe me when I tell you that you are my favorite girl!” he yelled back. “Why waste time with anyone subpar?” He smiled at me genuinely and nodded, raising those eyebrows at my questioning eyes. I looked down and blushed. Wow! Really? Was that even possible? He lifted me to sit on the edge of the stage, and he settled between my legs. I felt like it was just a little too intimate, but didn’t make him move. He chatted me up for as long as he could until the crowd was getting antsy. Keane had joined us about halfway through, and he had my hand, playing with my fingers while they talked. Jase stayed between my legs and let his hands rest next to my hips while he kept me laughing at stupid stories from his various other gigs. I hoped to God I would never be in one of those. I finally pulled the card with the lyrics that I’d brought with me and asked him if he knew if they belonged to a song.

  “This looks like it came from a floral shop, Kins. Someone send you flowers, Baby?” I nodded and told him they were in a mix of a ton of others as though it were nothing, but I grinned like an excited ass so that he knew I was not some snobby diva who wasn’t thrilled to death that she’d been thought of. I’d ended up with four more bouquets of roses and three boxes of chocolates, as well as another group of balloons at work that evening from regulars who had crushes. They’d all brought them to me themselves and told me that they knew I didn’t date, but to just keep them in mind if ever I decided to do so. Jase took the card and told me he’d look into it because they seemed familiar. “Gotta be careful with the ones that don’t leave information, Baby. Never know who’s watching you, okay?”

  “Yes, daddy.”

  He gave me a bit of smart ass with his grin, but licked his lips and told me being called daddy wasn’t really his style, but we could see how things went when the moment presented itself. I slapped his arm and told him he was far too presumptuous, but my big smile kept me from being taken too seriously. They reluctantly told me they needed to go back on, and Jase leaned in and told me he had never gotten his kiss and was doing a terrible job with a dramatic look up through his lashes. I laughed and put my lips to his already close cheek. I let them linger for just a second, then pulled back. He licked his lips and looked at mine, but didn’t try. Gosh, I wanted him to right now. Especially like the loose one he had given me the last time. I still daydreamed about deepening that one… Jeez, how had he gotten me onboard so easily?

  He lifted me off the stage and set me gently on the floor, but grabbed my hand and pulled me back to him before I could walk away. “Kins, any requests?” he asked me.

  “Surprise me,” I challenged him with a pretty smile. He raised his eyebrows and nodded, a slow grin spreading across his face. He let me go, and I made my way back over to the bar to begin working again.

  “Alright, alright! Sorry, I may have taken fifteen, but have ya’ll seen that cute bartender recently?!” he shouted to the crowd.

  Kayleigh beamed at me with wide eyes and let her mouth drop open along with mine. The bar roared with agreement, which was incredibly flattering if I do say so myself. “So, then, you forgive me?” he asked them as he began to slowly strum his guitar as he spoke. They definitely forgave him. “Okay, I am gonna need a volunteer for this one, anyone know how to work a tambourine?” Only about every girl in the bar, apparently. He pointed one out, and three of them tripped over each other before one of them won out triumphantly. She straightened her dress and smoothed her hair as he held the tambourine out to her. She made eyes at him as she took it. He leaned over and asked her something. She happily nodded, obviously excited. Hmmm… I wonder…

  He turned to the rest of the group and said something that we couldn’t hear. He pulled the mic and held it up to his mouth, and he held his hand up and pointed in my direction. Oh no! “Kinsley, Baby, this one is for you!” The crowd cheered wildly as the tambourine shook, and Dan began to strum those familiar bass chords to the beginning of “Are You Gonna Be My Girl.” Holy shit! Mel joined in, then Keane ripped it up while Jase screamed into the mic! I cupped my hands over my mouth in shock. They lit up the stage with Jet! I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t peg Jase for that type of music. Jase would definitely need that water after this! Mel looked thrilled as he pounded on his drums like a total rock star, making Kay completely crack up. Such a confident badass, that one. All of them really. The woman was really good with the tambourine, and the whole audience began to dance as Jase pointed over to me while he sang, you know, in case there was any confusion as to who the hell Kinsley the bartender was. I knew my face was red, it had to be because it was on fire! He began strumming between lyrics as he smiled at me. What the hell do I think about this? I mean he was sitting here singing about a woman who looked good, changed the lyrics for the hair to red, and pretty much sang that he’d like to make his own while he pointed at me. Was he just being his silly rockstar still? That had to be it, and I was just the lucky contestant in the audience, right?

  Oh, that man was insufferable! I clapped along with the rest of the audience, while I beamed in total adoration, to be honest. This was incredible! It was a very, very fun song, and I couldn’t get the stupid smile off of my face. My cheeks hurt from smiling so big. Gosh, he was hot. He put so much passion into it, and I knew his voice
was going to be really raspy for the rest of the night from all that screaming, just the way I like it… He flipped his hair out of his face while he held the mic on the stand, then pulled it again to dance around the stage like an idiot. He was not afraid to be himself, and he knew it would make me laugh. It was fantastic! I covered my face in my hands since it was almost too much to handle because he was so damn silly, hot, hell what else? Take your pick! I pulled my hands away so I could make some more drinks and sing along. Finally, Jase fell to his knees and pointed to me once more as he belted those last lyrics, and they slammed the song to a close. I had to throw my hands over my face again! I couldn’t look.

  “Kinsley James you better look at that man! He just asked you a question if you ask me,” Kayleigh was in my ear wickedly reasoning with me.

  “It was just a song. He doesn’t see me like that, I’m sure. You know how flirty that man is,” I reasoned realistically.

  “Oh, yeah, he isn’t into you at all,” she agreed as she watched him get up off the stage and smile foolishly at me. “And I am in no way attracted to that ugly ass Mel over there, either.”

  Mel was smokin’ hot! “Alright, point taken, and me neither,” I joked.

  We made more drinks while Jase told the girl onstage she could do one more and made her entire week. The guys nodded to him as he told them what he wanted. She nodded that she could do it. “Alright, this song is for the hot, little, redheaded bartender,” Jase told the crowd.

  I had to laugh as I shook my head. What would it be this time? Another very upbeat song. Buckcherry. “Next To You.” Once again the whole band worked the stage and enjoyed the music Jase was pulling for his little stunt. The guys both watched me as I made drinks while they totally rocked out. I laughed every time I looked up there. I felt very flattered, and so many customers told me what a lucky girl I was. Others asked me how long I had been seeing Jase and were shocked when I told them I wasn’t. Women got onto me for having not taken advantage of him, men asked me out instead. Either way, this was way more attention than I was used to personally getting, and Jase knew all the while. I could care less because I was enjoying every minute of this man’s bold behavior for the time being.