Keeping Score

by Shannon Stults

  “Nothing now. But I’d like to work in a gallery if I can.”

  She smiled. “Well, there’ll be plenty of galleries there you could apply at.”

  “Sure.” Logan sighed. “But the question is whether or not I can impress someone out there when I’m still fresh out of college and have absolutely no experience to speak for me. I was hoping to find something out here I could do to add to my résumé before I go, but no such luck.”

  Louise perked up. “Actually, I happen to know a place that could use someone like you.”

  “Really?”

  She picked up the stack of paperwork on the table between them. “I’m just finishing up the planning stages right now. I’ve decided I’d like to reopen the gallery. The shop is still under my name, and now that everything with my family is calming down I’m realizing just how much I’ve missed it.”

  Logan couldn’t believe her ears. “And you’re saying you want me to help? Why?”

  “Who else would I ask? You knew the shop as well as I did, and you’ve always had a knack for picking out the work of a talented artist. I could use that at the gallery. Not to mention you spent enough time there with me to know how the business works, and I could teach you whatever you don’t know.”

  A smile spread across Logan’s face. “You’re really doing this?”

  “I’ve already talked to some of the local artists I used to show. And I’ve worked up some financial and business plans to get everything started,” she said, indicating the stack of papers again. “I can’t do it alone. It won’t be easy, and the pay will be atrocious. But this could be exactly what you need to stand out in San Francisco. So what do you say? Will you help me? I wouldn’t trust anyone else.”

  Logan felt like she might cry she was so excited. Before she could put too much thought into it, she asked, “When do we start?”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Logan didn’t think she’d ever been so happy in her life. Well, maybe when her momma took her and Carly to see Garth Brooks during his comeback tour, but this was a very close second.

  “I’m meeting Ms. Snyder at the shop Monday so we can really visualize everything and get some plans in order,” she told both her parents over the celebratory dinner she’d made for them that night.

  “And she’s already given me a list of local artists to call so we can let them know the gallery’s opening back up. And we need to hire someone to get everything ready. She wants to be up and running in a few weeks.”

  “Weeks, really?” her momma said, grinning at her for the first time since the California bomb had been dropped. “You’ve really got your work cut out for you. You sure you can handle it?”

  “It’ll be tough, but this is what I need. I don’t know how long it’ll be until Jacob and I have to move, and I want to get as much done as possible. I need the experience, not to mention I really don’t want to leave Ms. Snyder—I mean, Louise—in the lurch with everything half finished.”

  “What about Jacob? What did he say when you told him?”

  Logan dropped her fork. In all her excitement, she’d forgotten to call Jacob and tell him the good news. He was going to be so happy for her. He’d said things would work out, and he’d be glad to know he was right. “I haven’t even told him yet.”

  Her momma laughed. “Well, why don’t you go do that while your daddy and I clean up here,” she said, grabbing the empty plates from the table.

  “Are you sure? I made dinner for you guys, I can clean it up.”

  “Nonsense. You deserve a break after that wonderful meal.”

  Logan didn’t know about wonderful. Her cooking skills were limited, and all she’d really done was throw together some Hamburger Helper and a salad.

  “Go on,” her mom told her. “I know you’re dying to call him. We can handle this.”

  Logan darted out of the room and up the stairs shouting “Thanks” over her shoulder. She paced in her bedroom as the phone rang in her ear.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey,” she said. “You’ll never believe what happened to me today,” she squealed.

  “Me either. I got the San Francisco spot.”

  Logan stopped pacing. “What?”

  Jacob laughed on the other end. “Isn’t it amazing! I got a call from the president of the board of directors. He’ll be in Atlanta for a conference this weekend and wants to have dinner in Athens tomorrow night.”

  She closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose between her fingers. “I didn’t realize the president of the board did the hiring.”

  “He doesn’t, but he’s taking a special interest in me since he knows my parents, and he’s recommending me to the head of emergency.”

  “But isn’t there supposed to be an interview at least? You said they would have you fly out for an interview before any real decision could be made.”

  “Well, yes, I’ll still have to go through the formal interview before they can officially give it to me. But, don’t you see, if the president wants to meet with me personally, it’s practically a done deal. Everything else is a formality.”

  Logan shook her head, her stomach heavy. “So how long does that give us? Did he say anything about when the other guy is leaving?”

  “Not yet,” Jacob said. “But I don’t imagine it will be too long. He made it sound like he wanted to get the matter handled rather quickly.”

  “Oh.” Too fast. This was all happening too fast.

  “You don’t sound very happy for me.”

  “No, I am,” she said. “It’s just that I got offered a job today, too.”

  “That’s great! Now that we’ve both got jobs lined up, we’ll be in San Francisco in no time. This is perfect!”

  She sighed. “The job I was offered is here in Willow Creek. I’m going to help a friend of mine with her art gallery in town. She had to close it a while back, but she’s ready to get it up and running again, and she wants my help. And it would be good for my résumé.”

  “That’s nice, Logan,” he said, audibly frowning. “But I don’t know how much good that’s going to do you. I imagine they’ll want me in San Francisco by the end of the month.”

  “The end of the month? That’s Carly’s wedding. You can’t expect me to pack up and move the same week as my best friend’s wedding. And I told Louise I would help her get the gallery ready. We’re talking at least four weeks from now. If not longer.”

  “I know it’s hard, Logan, but the San Francisco deal is already in motion.” Jacob’s voice was soft. “We’ll figure out Carly’s wedding, and I’m sure your friend can find someone else to help her with the gallery.”

  “What if…?” Logan hesitated. She realized how awful it sounded the second it came to mind, but it was the only way they could compromise. “What if you went to California without me?”

  “What?” he said flatly.

  “Hear me out,” she rushed on. “It would only be temporary. You could go to California, get things set up for us. You’ll be so busy assimilating to the new job you wouldn’t even see me that much anyway. But if I stay here, I could help Louise and get enough time with her to make a difference on my résumé. We’d both win.”

  Except for the part where they wouldn’t get to see each other. But really, how was that any different from their relationship now?

  Jacob was quiet a minute. “How long?” he finally asked.

  “I don’t know. Until our wedding?” she suggested calmly, waiting for the reaction she knew was coming. He didn’t disappoint.

  “You expect us to live on opposite sides of the country up until the wedding that we haven’t even set a date for? How could you possibly think any more distance between us would be a good idea?”

  “I know it’s not ideal,” she said patiently. “But we could make it work. I can stay here with my parents a little longer, spend more time with them. And we could always fly out to each other on weekends. Before we know it, we’ll be married and living in California together.”
>
  “Does that mean you’re ready to set a date then?” he sneered.

  “What…right now?”

  “Why not? You seem to think it will be so simple for us to be apart and barely ever see each other. I just want to know how long I’d have to wait. Six months? A year?”

  “Sweetie…”

  “Don’t sweetie me,” he snapped. “Is it too much to ask for you to set a damn date already? Just pick one, pick something, and we can go from there.”

  Logan’s cheeks grew warm, and she felt the same tightness in her stomach she got any time she thought about making it official. “It’s not that simple. We don’t even know where we want to get married. We have to have a venue, work around other people’s schedules. It has to be the right season, the right year—”

  “The right year? You don’t even know what year you want to marry me? Were you even planning on walking down the aisle in the next decade?”

  “Of course I want to marry you this decade. Look, I get that you’re upset.”

  “Damn right I’m upset. I’m starting to think you don’t want to marry me at all.” He huffed before going silent.

  “Jacob,” she said quietly, her eyes getting cloudy with moisture. Her voice was shaky, as well as her hands. “You know that’s not true.”

  She heard him take a deep breath on the other end of the line. He let it out. “Don’t. We’ll discuss this in person tomorrow. Be at my place around three.”

  “Three? Why?”

  His voice was cold. “Dinner with the president of the board. I mentioned I was getting married soon, and he insisted you come, too.”

  “Three is awfully early for dinner.”

  “Dinner will be at six. I want you here a couple hours early so we can have time to sort everything out, make sure we’re on the same page before you meet him.”

  “Oh,” she said, her stomach tightening. She imagined after tonight it was going to be a very strained and awkward afternoon. “Okay, I’ll be there. I love you.”

  The line went dead.

  *

  July—Before Junior Year

  Cole’s finger tapped against the steering wheel. The needle crept higher as he sped down the highway. Once Cole heard Old Man Carithers needed something dropped off at the Kases’ house, he couldn’t get in his Bronco fast enough.

  He probably smelled to high heaven after working in the fields all day, but he didn’t care. He’d been working all summer for Old Man Carithers, not to mention helping his dad at the hardware store whenever he could. Now it was the end of summer, and he’d hardly seen Logan aside from church on Sundays. Turned out working all day every day seriously cut into his time for plotting and pulling pranks.

  There was technically only one more week before they started their junior year, but he couldn’t wait that long. Going all summer barely talking to her, rarely seeing her face, he felt like he was drowning in darkness these last couple months.

  Christ, he was a mess. If Cowboy could only hear what went through his head all day, he’d say Cole was whipped.

  He turned onto Logan’s gravel road, his stomach twisting tighter the closer he got. He could just imagine her playful sneer when she opened the door and realized it was him. It was nearly a hundred degrees outside. Maybe if he was lucky, he’d find her in really short shorts or a bikini or something. Not that it mattered. She could be dressed as an Eskimo and his body would still react to her like it did for no one else.

  He was grinning when he pulled up into her driveway. She sat on the porch swing, her legs drawn up, and her arms folded on top of her knees. Her forehead was resting on her arms. The sun already seemed to shine a little brighter.

  Cole’s boots clunked as he walked up the porch steps.

  “Please, don’t get up on my account,” he teased.

  “Go away, Cole,” she groaned into her knees.

  “No can do, princess. The chief was supposed to come out to Old Man Carithers’s farm this morning to grab the tiller, but he never showed. So Carithers asked me to bring it over here for him.”

  She didn’t say anything.

  “Hello, Earth to Logan,” he said again. Her shoulders shook silently, and his stomach sank.

  “Lo,” he said, voice softer this time. “You okay?”

  She nodded fiercely, and a muffled sob escaped.

  His heart nearly stopped. He sat next to her on the swing. “Hey, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

  She shook her head.

  The tension in his chest eased only a fraction. “Tell me what’s wrong then,” he said, his voice gentler now.

  “You’ll think it’s stupid.”

  He put his hand on her back and began tracing circles over her tank top. “Try me.”

  Logan picked her head up and sat cross-legged. “It’s Maggie Mae.”

  “Your dog?”

  She nodded. “I came down to feed her this morning,” she said between sobs, refusing to look at him. “But when I got down to her she was…she was—”

  “Ah, Lo,” Cole said. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Daddy buried her out in the back this morning. That’s why he couldn’t come get the tiller.” She wiped at her eyes and sniffed. “I know she was old. I mean, it’s not like we didn’t see this coming. But it still hurts so much. I’m never going to see her again!”

  Logan cried louder and harder, her last words barely decipherable. The sound was like a pickax stabbing into his chest. He couldn’t remember a time he’d ever seen her cry like this, and he would do anything to make it stop.

  Still, he hesitated before scooting a few inches nearer and wrapping his arm around her shoulders. He pulled her close, allowing her to cry into his chest.

  Despite how desperately she’d pleaded for him to go away, she relaxed into his arms. He’d never held her like this before, though he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about it. It was strange, unlike anything he’d ever felt before, and so much better than he’d imagined. He didn’t think he’d ever been so happy and so completely wrenched at the same time.

  She nestled deeper into his hold, her body curled up into his side while her cheek rested on his chest. He used his legs to gently swing them back and forth. Could she hear how fast his heart pounded?

  “You know,” he said, “my aunt says that all the animals we ever had—cats, dogs, hamsters, even fish—every pet is up in heaven waiting for us to come home. So that means Maggie Mae is up there right now, wagging her tail like a little puppy, and looking down on you. She’s playing with all the other dogs up there until the day you can go see her.”

  “That’s really sweet.” She was silent another minute then took a deep breath. “You’re all sweaty,” she said before sucking in another breath.

  “Yeah, well, what do you expect? I’ve been working outside all day.”

  She inhaled deeply one last time before she pulled out of his arms, and he felt the absence like a lost limb. She looked up at him, wiping away the last of her tears. “Why are you being so nice to me?”

  Because every one of her tears burned away his confident front like acid rain. “Believe it or not, I can actually be a decent guy when I want to.” He leaned back while his legs still rocked them, laid his arm on the back of the swing behind her, and grinned. “You just make it hard sometimes.”

  Her eyes narrowed, her nose and lips scrunched, and Cole took a mental picture, committing the face to his memory. Christ, she was adorable. “I don’t know. I keep waiting for you to give me a noogie or try to shove my face in your smelly armpit or something.”

  He snorted. “As tempting as that is, I’m not interested in making your day any worse than it already is.”

  The corners of her mouth fell, a chunk of brown bangs falling over her eye. Without his bidding, his fingers moved to brush it back behind her ear, and Logan’s eyes widened just the tiniest bit. He yanked his hand back like the hair stung him. “You going to be okay?”

  She nodded.

  “Good. I
should get back to work then,” he said, standing from the swing. He wanted nothing more than to sit back down and pull her into his arms again, but there was no telling what other acts of betrayal his body might commit if he stuck around.

  “I’ll see you at school, Lo. Tell your dad he can bring the tiller back anytime.”

  Again she just nodded, her brows drawn together when he turned toward the porch steps. It took everything in his power not to turn back.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Logan remembered the day Jacob proposed. Finally, she’d thought. They’d been dating almost two years, and she’d started to worry the question would never come up. She’d decided long ago this was the guy she was going to marry. He was handsome, smart, responsible. And best of all, he made her feel nothing like the girl she’d been in Willow Creek. She’d be the respectable wife of a doctor, the woman her momma had always wanted to see her become. She’d been so happy.

  Now Logan had to wonder if that happiness she’d felt was the realization that she was going to spend the rest of her life with the one man she couldn’t live without or if it was the hope that marrying Jacob would be the final step in letting go of the girl she’d been before.

  These were the kinds of thoughts one couldn’t process while sober. Logan needed something to drown out and dull the overwhelming and confusing feelings before she could step back and properly sort through them. Then and only then would she feel like she could think.

  It wasn’t a healthy habit, she knew that, but it was one that had served her well over the years.

  As Logan pulled into the parking lot at Wade’s, she already felt some of the stress circulating through her veins subside. Yes, this was where she needed to be. She needed a beer, and then maybe another, maybe more. She’d worry about getting home later. Right now she only had one goal.

  She took a deep, satisfying breath as she opened the door; the smell of alcohol and fried food was incredibly comforting in her moment of need. She walked over to the nearly empty bar, stopping short when her eyes landed on one man. He sat alone, nursing a beer, his eyes on the Braves game playing on the small TV screen hanging in the corner.