by Kenna Grace
“What’s that for?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.
He screwed the lid back onto the bottle and chucked it back into his bag. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Why I was the way I was.” He paused for a moment with a sincere look pressed on his face. “I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist.”
I clicked my tongue off the roof of my mouth. “Hence the medication. Having your headaches again?” I asked, referring to how he used to complain about migraines. He resorted to using sleep medication shortly after he and my alpha father split. I assumed it was just his way of escaping and he was just using migraines as a ruse.
Henry averted his eyes, probably ashamed that most of the memories I had of him were of his absences.
“No, not the migraines. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. Been on the meds for a couple of years now. They really seem to be helping.”
Suddenly, everything started to make sense. I’d attributed it all to my alpha father leaving him, but Bipolar Disorder fit the bill perfectly. It explained his frequent fits of sadness, his uncharacteristic periods of anger, and inattention. It even explained why he’d lay in bed for days at a time withdrawn into himself.
I started getting angry at myself for not recognizing the signs earlier. “I didn’t know.” They were the only words I could get out of my mouth.
Henry’s lips tugged up into a smile. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me most. I wasn’t a great father. But I finally got the help I needed. If you don’t want me in your life, I understand. But, if you can find it in your heart to forgive me, I promise I’ll do whatever it takes to make it right again between us.”
I thought for a moment before speaking. This was a lot to take in. His diagnosis explained so much about my childhood, but it didn’t make everything instantly alright. Still, when I looked at him, all I could see in his eyes was sadness. “Dad. I can’t forget all those nights when I needed you and you weren’t there for me. I don’t need you to be my father.” I could feel tears start to well up in my eyes.
Henry’s breath started to quiver.
I continued, “But I’m going to be having a son in a couple weeks. And I’m sure he’d love to get to know his grandpa.”
Tears started to fall from Henry’s face. His lips pressed together, trying to quiet his heaving breath. He wiped his cheek with the sleeve of his shirt. “That’s all I want. A chance.”
I stood up and so did Henry. We stood there for a second, and then I stepped forward. I thought about walking out, but then Henry wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in against his chest, embracing me. It took me a moment, but then I wrapped mine around him and pulled him even tighter. All I wanted growing up was him to be there for me. Now, he finally was. I couldn’t forgive him, but I wanted to give him another shot.
After a moment, we broke our embrace and took our seats again.
Suddenly, I felt my phone vibrate from inside my pocket. “Just a second,” I told Henry, who watched me intently as I fished it out. “It might be Lachlan.” When I had it out, I was a little surprised to see that it was Tanya who was calling me.
“Hello?” I said, as I accepted the call and brought it up to my ear.
“Donovan. You need… Hospital…” Her voice sounded frantic and was hard to make out.
“Tanya, you need to calm down. I can’t understand what you’re saying. What’s going on?” I plugged my other ear with my finger to block out the chatter from the cafe.
I heard her take a few deep breaths before trying again. “You need to get to the hospital. It’s Lachlan.”
Before I could ask any more questions, she hung up the phone. My heart pounded in my chest and I could hear a ringing in my ears as I assumed the worst. “Dad, I have to go. It’s Lachlan. He’s at the hospital.” A cold sweat started to run over my body.
“The hospital? Is everything alright?”
“I have no idea, but I need to leave. Now.”
23
Lachlan
I watched Donovan as he walked out of the house to his car from the window. As soon as he drove off, I made my way back to the kitchen to make a cup of tea and enjoy the peace and quiet. I still had a few minutes until Tanya was supposed to arrive. It wasn’t going to be much, but I was relieved that I at least had a few more moments alone. Donovan had kept up with his babying me, and I appreciated everything he was doing, but it was going to be nice to sit down and not have someone constantly asking if I needed anything or if everything was alright.
I filled the kettle with some water and flicked on the switch. While it boiled, I grabbed a mug from the cupboard and tossed in a tea bag. When the switch on the kettle flicked off, I filled it up and let it steep for a few minutes before removing the bag and adding my milk. Usually I added some sugar, but I figured I should cut back a little after doing some research regarding sugar and pregnancy. I wasn’t sure if it had any actual merit or not, but I figured it was something I should probably cut back on a little anyway.
Taking a seat in the living room, I sipped on my tea and watched for Tanya’s car from the window. I leaned forward a little and rubbed the twinge that was aching at my lower back. I was expecting her to show up any minute now, but was a little thrown off when she hadn’t arrived by the time I finished my tea.
I figured she had probably stopped for gas or something and wasn’t all that concerned. Besides, a few more minutes to myself? I couldn’t complain. Looking around the house, I decided I could tidy up a bit before she got here. It wasn’t a mess by any means, but I had some loose magazines lying around and the floor could use a quick sweep.
I looked out the window one last time to make sure she wasn’t just down the street. When I saw that she wasn’t, I collected all the loose magazines. I put a few of the new ones on the coffee table and tossed the older ones in the trash. Then, grabbing the broom from the kitchen, I did a quick sweep of the hardwood. Normally, Donovan would take care of the cleaning since moving in. Actually, he straight up refused to allow me to help. It felt nice doing something on my own for once. I didn’t think I had been cleaning that long by the time I finished, but I was surprised when I looked at my phone and saw that it had been nearly half an hour since I started.
Now, I was starting to feel a little worried. Tanya should have been here by now. I decided to give her a call. Tanya wasn’t one for being late and if she was, I assumed she would have let me know. Especially considering that Donovan had given her a call right before he left and she said she was only five minutes away.
Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out my phone and called her. After ringing a few times, the call went to voicemail. This wasn’t like her at all. I was nervous that something had happened, but I brushed it off as me being a little paranoid. Something probably just came up and she was on her way here now.
When I sat back down on the couch, my back started to twinge. I inhaled sharply and leaned forward, massaging it with my hand. The past few weeks my back pain from the pregnancy started being present more often. Usually, Donovan would give me a rub down. That put it at bay for at least a little while.
After a few minutes of unsuccessfully trying to massage it out, I decided to walk around the house. Usually, a brief walk would help. As soon as I stood up, I felt better. I walked around, making a visit to each room. I wasn’t sure where to go, but as long as I kept moving I felt okay.
Suddenly, I felt what I thought was a pop from around my abdomen. Then, a slow trickle of wetness started to run down my leg. It took me a second, wondering what was going on, before it clicked. Shit, my water just broke.
Then, looking down, as if I wasn’t already in enough of a panic, I noticed that there was also blood that was running down my leg. At first it was only a trickle, but then it started to pool more heavily. I found myself wishing Donovan was here and I regretted all the times I had been annoyed by how closely he watched over me.
My mind was racing a million thoughts a second, but somehow, in the co
nfusion, I managed to pull my phone out of my pocket and instinctively dial 9-1-1.
Nearly immediately, an operator came on the line.
“I need help. My water just broke and I’m bleeding heavily. Please, send someone.” I tried to listen to the operator’s voice as they tried to calm me down, but I started to become lightheaded. Just then, as I was taking deep breaths as instructed, my vision started to blur. It cleared and blurred a few more times and specks of white come into focus. The phone was still in my hand, but I couldn’t hear anyone on the other line anymore. I tried to take a step, but my leg gave out and I crashed to the ground.
In between the blur of my vision, I managed to see my phone a couple feet from my hand. I tried to pull myself over but my body didn’t have the strength. My vision started to blur again, then faded completely to black.
24
Donovan
Before I even realized it, I was pulling into the entrance of the hospital. The drive here was a blur, my mind racing with thoughts of what could have happened. When I left to meet my father, I had called Tanya and she said she would be there in just a few minutes. I tried to call Lachlan and Tanya as I was driving, but there was no answer from either of them. As soon as I pulled through the entrance, I brought the car to a squealing halt in one of the emergency spots near the front doors of urgent care.
“Lachlan?” I called out as I walked into urgent care. His voice didn’t call back to me and I couldn’t spot him by looking around the waiting room. Just as I was about to head towards the receptionist to ask if Lachlan had been checked in, I saw Tanya walk out of one of the medical rooms with something pressed against her head.
“Donovan, is that you?” she called out in my direction when she noticed I was jogging over to her.
She still had a look of shock on her face and her eyes were squinted partially shut from the bright lights overhead. When I got closer, I realized that the thing pressed against her head was a bag of ice on top of a bandage. “What the hell happened to you?”
She took a disoriented step towards me and placed a hand on my shoulder to steady herself. It was then that I noticed her head was bleeding from underneath the bandage. Realizing she was in no state to be walking around, I led her to one of the emptier waiting rooms and had her take a seat on a chair.
“How bad is it?” I asked, leaning towards her and gently peeling the wrap around her head down a little.
“I’m fine,” she replied, but wincing as soon as I touched the bandage.
“Well, you’re not fine. You’re going to need stitches. What happened?” I pulled the bandage back up and took a seat on the chair next to her.
She pushed the icepack back against her head. “I got hit by a car.”
My eye-brows tugged up and a shock shivered through my body. “Lachlan? Did he get hit also? Is he alright? Where did the paramedics take him?”
“No, I hadn’t made it to Lachlan’s yet. I was only a couple blocks away when I pulled out of the bike path. Out of nowhere, some asshole peeled out of his driveway without looking and backed into me.” She took a deep breath and readjusted the ice to the back of her head.
“Damn, I’m glad you’re alright.”
Tanya gave me a smile, but it faded quickly as she continued her story. “Someone must have seen what happened, because before I could even collect myself, I heard sirens. Not a minute later, the cops showed up. I knew I needed to get to Lachlan’s place as soon as possible, but they made me stay so they could take my statement on what had happened.”
She paused for a moment and licked her lips. She still looked dazed and took a moment to recollect everything that had happened. “My head was bleeding pretty profusely and the officers wanted me to come to the hospital to get it checked out. I refused, knowing that Lachlan shouldn’t be left alone considering his condition and all. So, I refused and told them that I would, but that I needed to get to my friend’s place just to make sure he was alright. I told them that he isn’t supposed to be alone, and that you had just left his place moments prior and that he was expecting me. They were a little hesitant to let me leave without medical attention, but I assured them I would as soon as you got back.”
Tanya paused again and took a deep breath. “So, what happened when you got to Lachlan’s?” I asked, placing a comforting hand on top of her shoulder. I was starting to feel a little restless waiting to hear what had happened to him and if he was alright, but I reminded myself that she had just had a traumatic experience herself and was trying her best to explain to me what had happened.
“When I got to Lachlan’s, an ambulance was parked out front. The door was already opened, so I took a step inside. Just as I did, EMT’s rushed past me with him lying on a wheeled stretcher.” She licked her lips, tears starting to fall down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry, Donovan. I have no idea what happened to him. I tried asking as they wheeled him over to the ambulance, but they wouldn’t give me any answers about what happened or about his condition.”
I felt an ache in my chest. Despite having this conversation with Tanya, I still was no further ahead in knowing what had happened to Lachlan. I shook my head and tried to fight my own tears that I could feel starting to well up in my eyes. “This is all my fault. I should have just fucking waited until you got there. I should have been there for him.” I leaned back in my chair and wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt.
“It’s not your fault, Donovan. You can’t blame yourself for what happened.” She pressed her lips together and tried to force a smile.
I wanted to believe her. I knew there was nothing I could do now. “H-How,” I stuttered. I swallowed the lump in my throat and tried again. “How did he look?” My jaw rattled with each quivered breath.
Tanya pressed her lips together again and shook her head. “He just looked really pale. I’m sorry I don’t have anything else I can tell you.”
Suddenly, a man’s voice called out, “Donovan?”
I looked up and saw a familiar face in a pair of scrubs. I didn’t know him by name, but I had seen him around a few times and knew he worked in the surgical department. When I stood up, he approached me.
“Donovan Shields?”
I nodded. “How’s Lachlan? Is he alright? Can I see him?”
“Lachlan is in surgery right now. We have to proceed with an emergency C-section. You can’t see him at this exact moment, but if you follow me to the surgical waiting room, I promise we will take you in to see him as soon as he’s stable.”
Nodding, I followed him down the hall and past a few corridors to the surgical section. I still wasn’t positive what was going on, but at least now I knew where he was.
“Wait here, someone will be out as soon as we have some information for you. I know this is difficult and you’re probably wondering what’s going on. But you’re a doctor and you know how these things are.” He gave me a forced smile and checked his clipboard before walking off.
I stood there for a minute still in a daze. I’d been in the surgical department hundreds of times, but now being on the other side of a medical emergency, it all felt surreal. I licked my lips and walked back and forth waiting for someone to come out and tell me what the hell was going on.
After another thirty minutes of hearing no word on how Lachlan was doing, much less if he was alright, I decided to take the situation into my own hands. I walked towards the doors to enter the surgical room and stepped inside.
As I walked in, I glanced through the large window and saw Lachlan lying down on the flat bed with Amanda looking over him and a few nurses standing next to her. Taking a deep breath, I gathered all the confidence I could muster up and walked to the sink and started to scrub up. I put on one of the coats that was hanging up and walked into the room. A few of the nurses looked at me, confused, but didn’t say anything.
I’d been in this room on a weekly basis, so it wasn’t like it was unusual for them to see me here. I let out a sigh of relief when they shifted their focus back to Amanda.
As I approached, Lachlan noticed me.
“Donovan, you’re here!” he exclaimed, a look of joy overtaking his face.
“Donovan,” Amanda piped up.
Making my way to Lachlan, I grabbed his hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.
“A moment, please,” Amanda interrupted.
I let go of Lachlan’s hand and took a step back just out of earshot from the others in the room. “You’re not supposed to be in here, Donovan,” Amanda whispered just loud enough that I was the only one who could hear.
I licked my lips before replying. “I know. It’s just, I had no idea what was going on and nobody could tell me anything. I need to be here for him. Is he alright?”
She clicked her tongue off the roof of her mouth and stood silently for a moment, rolling the information around in her head and trying to decide if she should kick me out or not. It was against company policy to have non-essential individuals in the surgery room. Finally, she spoke. “He needs an emergency C-section. Look, you’re not supposed to be in here, but you are a doctor and we might need the extra hands. I’m not going to lie, the surgery is going to be higher risk than normal considering the placement of the placenta. I’ll let you stay, but you need to keep your cool. Got it?”
“Absolutely,” I replied immediately.
Just then, Lachlan let out a blood-curdling scream. “What’s going on?” I demanded, stepping back next to him.
“We need to start the C-section now,” one of the nurses replied. She looked over to Amanda for her approval.
She gave them a nod. “Administer the anesthesia.”
Lachlan grunted a few more times in discomfort before the drug relaxed him. I reached over and took his hand back in mine. “It’s going to be alright,” I reassured him, though I said it for myself as well.
