by L. A. Fiore
“Why?”
“No idea, especially since Abel doesn’t live here any more.”
I had to agree with Jayce, Abel’s dad sounded like a real jackass. “He was only fourteen when he was kicked out?”
“Yeah. Tiny took him in. After a few years, they moved to Cheyenne and started the business.”
So he’d found his way too, survived despite the odds being stacked against him. I admired that; hell, I even respected it. And those feelings were dangerous. Lusting after a man was one thing, liking the kind of man he was, particularly that man, spelled trouble. Time to change the subject. “What about you?”
“What do you mean?” Duncan asked.
“I can’t help but get the sense that running trails isn’t really what you want to do.” It was like I’d hit an exposed nerve. He jerked. “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business.”
His voice was flat, much like how it sounded earlier at his dad’s house. “I’m a Hellar, that farm is our heritage.”
Wow, that sounded like it was something that had been drilled into his head.
“You can leave. You should leave.” Jayce’s comment was also one that clearly had been said before.
“Right, just like that.” Pained was how he sounded, like an old wound that never healed, one that still ached. I understood that, boy, did I understand that. Duncan seemed lost in that pain for a minute before remembering Rylee and I were there. An easy smile spread over his face, the ease in which he offered it was proof that he had mastered faking it. “Sorry. We don’t need to air Hellar dirty laundry.”
My heart went out to Duncan, his struggle to do right by his family at the risk of what he wanted. Life was too short though to agonize over the little stuff; sometimes you had to do what was best for you and if your family loved you they would be happy regardless. I had learned that lesson from the Stephenses, the family I had been lucky enough to marry into. “My husband died. He left our bed in the middle of the night to pick up my brother. An addict. They were hit head-on by a tractor trailer. The driver had fallen asleep at the wheel. In an instant they were both gone. And I have spent the past three years afraid to move forward and unable to go back. But what I have learned, staying stationary isn’t living. I don’t know your story, but I do know that you have to live your life for you.”
I hadn’t realized my eyes had teared up until Duncan handed me a napkin. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“What the fuck?” Abel stood over me seething. “What the fuck did you say to her?”
“Calm down,” Duncan said. I thought he was remarkably brave considering Abel looked about ready to level the place.
Abel hunched down so that Duncan and he were eye level. “What the fuck did you say to her?”
“He didn’t say anything.”
Abel’s head twisted to me, his eyes moving over my face. I noticed his jaw was clenched. “So why the fuck did you start crying after these two assholes showed up?”
Despite his interruption, he was here because of concern for me. And there it was again, coming to my aid even though not a half an hour ago he’d fled. Finding balance around him was clearly not going to happen. “I made myself cry.”
He looked confused and on that face it was oddly adorable. “Why the fuck would you do that?”
“Have you ever said a full sentence without the word fuck?”
In reply, I was gifted with a smile—a genuine smile that was not laced with sarcasm or sexual innuendo and honest to God, it was breathtaking. Belatedly it dawned on me that I was staring at his mouth and when I lifted my gaze to his, he looked hungry again.
“Why did you make yourself cry?” He did a face, a ‘see I can speak a full sentence without fuck’ and again I found his sarcasm charming.
“A bad memory.”
Understanding moved over his expression and though I sensed he wanted to ask something, he didn’t. Instead he asked, “How’s the ride?”
“It’s good. Thanks again for your help.”
“Yeah.”
He seemed to remember there were others at the table at the same time I did. He spared them a glance before his pale gaze came back to me. “See you around, Doc.”
He was halfway to the door before I could reply.
“Be careful,” Duncan said, his words sounding almost dire.
“Excuse me.”
“Abel is really good at roping a woman in, but he isn’t one for long-term. I’d hate to see you get hurt.”
I’d already come to that conclusion, but it hit a nerve hearing a friend of Abel’s saying it. Yes, Abel probably had many notches on his bedpost and Duncan knew of my past, but for some reason that comment from him rubbed me the wrong way. I nodded at him, so he knew I’d heard him, but I couldn’t help but think with friends like that who needed enemies.
That night while trying for sleep, something that was becoming more and more elusive thanks to the sexy and deeply confusing Abel, I felt my bed move. Lifting my tired lids, I saw Sandbar standing midway down the bed staring at me. I tried not to move, didn’t want him to jump down. Every morning since he came here I woke to him staring at me. This was the first time he’d jumped on the bed. It’d only been a little over a month and already he was on my bed. Progress.
I waited to see what he’d do and when he walked around in a circle before curling up into a ball at my stomach, I wanted to shout with glee. Touchdown. He’d be letting me rub his head soon enough. I slept the stillest I ever had, not wanting to disturb him. And when I woke in the morning, he was still there.
Rylee and I were checking out the town’s block sale. The alley behind the clinic that ran down to the bakery had been cordoned off so that local businesses could set up tables to offer their goods in a fair-like setting. The area restaurants served up food and drinks as tourists and locals alike moved along the alley for a day of outdoor shopping.
“I love this,” Rylee said as we strolled down the alley eating funnel cakes—one of the many treats being sold by the talented Stella.
I did too. It was a wonderful way to sample what the shopping district had to offer. “Doc Cassidy said they do this three times a year.”
“It’s brilliant. Same products, different atmosphere and from the number of bags I’m seeing, it works.”
The stirring of the hair at the nape of my neck turned my attention farther down the alley to where Abel stood with Jayce drinking beer, but Abel’s attention was on me. He’d kept his distance since learning of Jake, but I was still the recipient of his mind-numbing, body-heating stares. I could admit to myself, that despite the reality that he would chew me up and spit me out, there was an ever-growing part of me that wanted to take that reckless ride with him because I suspected it’d be worth the pain that followed. And acknowledging that I wanted him—accepting that sex with him was inevitable—felt like when I dieted and got a hankering for a spoonful or two of ice cream only to cave into my craving by devouring the whole damn pint. I craved Abel and I wanted to devour him, every last inch.
In true Abel fashion, he blatantly slid his gaze over me and the corresponding aches he set off in my body were as delicious as they were vexing. By the time those baby blues returned to my face, I was in imminent danger of spontaneously combusting. The sexy bastard winked and like lighting a match to a fuse, my entire body went up in flames. He lifted his beer in a sort of salute and flashed me a crooked grin. Yep, I’d never survive Abel and what a way to go.
“Oh look, there’s Jayce and Abel. Damn, Jayce looks hot. The man should seriously come with a warning.”
Rylee’s comment was so strange, it earned my attention but hers was on Jayce and she looked how I felt. “A warning?”
“Yeah, use at your own risk. I want to take the risk.”
My eyes caught hers and she grinned. “Let’s go say hi.” She didn’t wait for my answer. She dropped our empty plates in the trash can before grabbing my arm and dragging me down the alley. And she was dragging me because I wanted to ta
ke the risk with Abel and that scared me because feeling as I did there was a seventy, eighty…eighty-five percent chance I was going to jump him. That would not be a good idea. Unfortunately for me those odds went up even higher when Rylee and Jayce got lost in the crowd leaving me alone with him.
“Doc.”
“Abel.”
“Do you want a beer?”
Beer? No. You naked? Yes. On second thought a nice cold beer to cool the heat burning through me sounded like a good idea. “Yeah, that’d be great.”
He twisted his head to address the young woman manning the beer station; her eyes were glued to him, her expression one of supreme worship. I understood completely because my focus was on the thick column of his neck and how it flowed into his wide shoulders. My hands itched to follow the muscled line of his back, down his spine to the curve of his ass, over his thigh, around and up to…
“Doc?”
It was only then that I realized my gaze had been on his fly, a fact not lost on him if the carnal stare was any indication. I was mortified and seriously turned on.
“Looks like you need to cool off.”
What an understatement. I didn’t want to cool off, I wanted to get overheated and sweaty with him. And again he read me perfectly by the growl that rumbled deep in his throat. Taking the beer, I drank the entire cup in one long swallow.
“You might want to take it easy. That’ll go right to your head, especially in this heat.” It wasn’t his words but the look he gave me that was nearly my undoing and by that I mean I really almost jumped him. Instead I fought for control over my baser instincts but unlike him, I wasn’t as skilled in communicating while burning up with lust, as evident by how abruptly I changed the topic.
“You said you were only here for a couple of months. Can I ask why?”
“Just helping a friend.” His playfulness turned somber, answered by a wicked ache in my chest because the seriousness of his expression suggested not just concern for this friend, but a connection that ran deep. I couldn’t help but think of the woman I had given a ride to. Was she his girlfriend? And it was the reality that I was sliding down a slope I had no business being on and for a man I knew really nothing about that had me retreating. Mr. Milburn and Cooper were walking toward us. Perfect timing.
I waved enthusiastically until I got Mr. Milburn’s attention. Before he reached us, Abel moved closer so his chest brushed up against my back. His soft breath teased my ear. “Too hot for you, Doc?”
I had never felt the level of sexual tension I did then. I nearly wept from the sweet torture. Being coy wasn’t happening, so I answered with candor. “Hell, yeah.” I managed breathlessly.
Before Abel could reply, Mr. Milner joined us. “Sidney, how are you?”
How was I? Horny, since I apparently had the sexual appetite of a teenage boy. To Mr. Milburn, I lied. “I’m wonderful. Would you like some company?”
“That would be lovely.”
Chancing a glance at Abel, a twisted sort of satisfaction and confusion moved through me because he appeared to be battling the same feelings I was. Was it possible he was single? The idea of that had me feeling reckless. I needed to put some distance between us before I threw caution to the wind. “Thanks for the beer.”
Abel was looking at my mouth when he replied, “Anytime, Doc.”
The man was too tempting.
“Are you enjoying the block sale?” Mr. Milburn asked.
Luckily, I was able to hold a normal conversation, because the farther from Abel we walked, the more in control I felt. “I am and the weather couldn’t be more perfect.”
“And how are you adjusting?”
“With surprising ease. We’ve only been here a short while and I already feel like this is home.”
“It’s a great town.”
“Have you lived here your whole life?”
“Maggie and I moved here in the fifties. If you can believe it, the town was even smaller then. I was the only lawyer.”
“Do you have any children in the area?”
Pain swept his face and my heart dropped. “Maggie and I had hoped to have children, but it wasn’t to be.”
I ached for him because I understood all too well how that felt. “I’m so sorry.”
Somehow he smiled, despite the pain I saw buried in his expression. “You know better than most, but Maggie and I did okay. We had a wonderful life together; I’ll admit the lack of children left a hole in both of us and I think that’s why we became so active in the community. The town became our family in a sense.” There was a note of something in his voice, but I couldn’t discern what fueled it.
“Was she a lawyer too?”
“A behavioral therapist, who offered her services for free to those who needed it—visiting local shelters and halfway houses. She believed that people deserved second chances and that some traveled down a road because of circumstances rather than desire. Our work filled the hole and brought a sense of continuity and connection that we both longed for.”
“That’s why you continue to work on a part-time basis.”
He smiled, pleased that I understood. “Exactly.”
Slipping my arm through his, I smiled back. “I think this town and its people are very lucky to have you, to have had Maggie.”
“That is very sweet of you to say.”
“Have you had a funnel cake yet?”
“No.”
“Would you like to split one?”
“I would, very much.”
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Rylee stood outside the shelter with the tranquillizer gun. I was heading inside the pen. It had been five weeks since Cain came to stay with us and I had been right. He was part dog and how calm he was in the presence of humans made it clear to me that he had been around them before.
Even for as gentle as Cain was—not snapping or growling or showing aggression—he had been living in the wild for some time and so I had to be mindful of that. I wanted to try to brush his fur, to clean up his coat since he was magnificent and would be even more so when his fur was shiny and smooth. I wouldn’t do that today; today I’d just get in his space and see how he responded. Hopefully we could work up to a brushing.
“I do. I think it’s going to be fine, but you’ve got the sedative just in case.”
“I don’t know about this.”
“You said it yourself, he hasn’t shown any aggressive behavior.”
“I know. Just no sudden moves.”
Unlatching the gate, I opened it a crack but I didn’t immediately enter so Cain could get used to the idea of me in his space. He walked from the far side of the shelter, right up to the gate and then he dropped onto his butt and just stared at me. Now that he had put on weight, he looked more wolf than dog. He was big too. If that mountain lion came around again, he’d have a run for his money.
I stepped closer; Cain tilted his head and studied me. I sat down next to him. He shifted back a bit, his eyes never leaving mine, and then he dropped on to his belly.
“Holy shit. He likes you. That must feel incredible.” Rylee sounded as awed as I felt.
“You have no idea.”
“Come on. Come with me. It’s going to be fun. We’ll be like real cowgirls.”
Rylee was joining Jayce on a trail ride. I loved horses but not riding them. I intended to do my own sightseeing, but my feet would be staying firmly on the ground.
“I’m sure. You go, have fun.”
“I hate leaving you alone.”
“Rylee, we live together and we work together. I realize I’m fabulous company, but you see me all the time.”
“I really do want to go.”
“Then go.”
“Okay.”
“Could you do one thing for me though?”
“Sure, what?”
“Just be smart. I get a weird vibe from the Hellar clan. I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but just be smart.”
Rylee settled in next to me at our small kitche
n table. “What kind of weird vibe?”
“I don’t know. The dynamic between Duncan and the dad seems strained, like the loving family is a show and Duncan’s comment about Abel that night at the Brass Bull struck me as wrong.”
“But you were already thinking the same about him.”
“Yes, but Duncan and he have known each other for years and for him to so easily paint a negative picture of his childhood friend to a stranger isn’t right.”
Rylee leaned back in her chair. “Yeah, I can see that. I think he warned you only because he had just learned about Jake and Connor.”
“And that could be all it is, but I wanted to mention it or it would have bothered me.”
“I get it. We’ve been doing that since we were kids, watching out for each other and so I will heed your warning.”
“And don’t fall off the horse.”
“I rode when I was little. Not well, but I think I’ll be okay.”
“I’m going on a trail. I’ll leave the details on the counter just in case.”
“Make sure to bring your cell and plenty of water.”
“I will.”
A horn sounded. Jayce was here. “That’s for me. I’ll see you later.” Rylee jumped up and pulled me in for a hug. “I’m happy to see you taking so well to this place. I think it was good that we did this.”
“I think so too. And thanks for the nudge.”
“It was more a kick.” She grabbed her pack. “See you later.”
An hour later, I was heading off for my own adventure. As promised, I left the name of the trail I was taking on the counter. The number to the office where the trail trips were coordinated and the time I intended to start. My phone was charged, I had three canteens of water and my car had gas. I stopped at a sandwich shop for lunch and while I waited in line at the deli to place my sandwich order, the door opened and Abel strolled in. He was looking for someone with the way he scanned the place and then his eyes connected with mine. And like a moth to flame, I felt that pull for him.
