by Joan Jonker
Nellie let her head drop on to the table. In a muffled voice, she said, ‘I can’t hear yer, girl, I’m too weak.’
Molly took the hint, and in seven minutes flat the two mates had a cup of tea in front of them, and a custard cream between their fingers. Nellie had noted there were six biscuits on the plate and her spirits had lifted. She was feeling very generous. ‘Yer know, girl, if I asked George to take his shirt off one day, when he was going down the yard to the lavvy, he would do. And I could give you the wire and yer could come up and see him for yerself. Yer see, if I told yer he knocked Tarzan into a cocked hat for brawn, yer wouldn’t believe me, would yer? But if yer saw it with yer own eyes, then yer’d have to believe me.’ As she moved her head to look into Molly’s face, she moved her hand at the same time, towards the plate with the last biscuit on. ‘He’s very obliging is my George.’
‘I’m sure he is, sunshine, but in this case I’ll take your word for it. And I won’t forget to tell Jack tonight. But so I get it right, let me make sure. George knocks Tarzan into a cocked hat for brawn. Have I got it spot on, sunshine?’
‘Dead on the nose, girl, dead on the nose.’
‘Right, then, let’s make tracks.’ Molly pushed her chair back as she asked herself who was the daftest, her or Nellie? And the answer came right away. She was dafter than her mate, for she was the one who’d be coming back to these dirty dishes. ‘We’ll go up to Jill’s first, see if she wants us to do any shopping. Then we’ll call over the road later. Doreen said she was getting her own shopping, anyway, to give the baby some fresh air.’
Leaving the cups on the table, the two mates left the house, made sure the door was firmly closed, then linked arms and walked up the street with their shopping baskets over their arms.
Jill’s face lit up when she opened the door. ‘Me and Auntie Lizzie were just talking about you, Mam. We were hoping you would call to see the new tooth your granddaughter’s got.’
‘Oh, has she?’ Molly looked delighted until she felt herself being pushed aside by her mate. ‘Ay, what was that for?’
Nellie put on her fierce expression. ‘Have you and Jill forgotten that I’m also young Molly’s grandma? If it hadn’t been for my son Steve, there wouldn’t have been no baby. So just think on in future.’
Jill stepped down on to the pavement and hugged her mother-in-law. ‘I hadn’t forgotten you, Auntie Nellie, how could I? If it hadn’t been for you I wouldn’t have the most handsome, wonderful husband in the world. So come in and see yer granddaughter. You and me mam are in for a surprise.’
Under her breath, Molly muttered, ‘Today’s been full of surprises.’
‘Did yer say something, girl?’ Nellie asked as she pulled herself on to the top step. ‘If yer said what I think yer did, then I agree with yer. Today’s prices are terrible.’
‘No, sunshine, yer heard me wrong. I was talking to meself really, just saying how I fancied one of Hanley’s pies.’
Nellie turned, her chubby face one big smile. ‘It’s funny how you and me think alike, girl. That’s exactly what I had in mind. We’ll get one each for our lunch, eh?’
‘Whatever yer like, sunshine, but will yer move in now, so I can see the baby, and Lizzie.’
The word surprise came up again, but this time it brought cries of delight and pride. For crawling across the floor towards her two grandmas was baby Molly, gurgling with eagerness to get to the two women, who she knew would pick her up and tickle her tummy.
Molly turned her head to hide the tears that sprang to her eyes. They weren’t tears of sadness, but of happiness and emotion. For young Molly, eight months old now, brought back memories of when her eldest born, Jill, was the same age as the baby who was now squealing to be picked up. Same vivid blue eyes and blond hair. Please God the baby would grow up to be as beautiful and kind as her mother.
‘D’yer know, girl, this takes me back over twenty years,’ Nellie said. ‘She’s the spitting image of your Jill, and Doreen. And they all take after you.’
Molly swallowed the lump in her throat and tried to keep her tone light. ‘Are yer trying to tell me in a nice way, sunshine, that me and my daughters are as ugly as sin?’
‘I’m not that daft, girl,’ Nellie said as she bent to pick the baby up. ‘I’d have to say me granddaughter was ugly, wouldn’t I?’ There weren’t many things that Nellie became emotional over, but her two grandchildren brought out the very best in her. She wasn’t a real grandma to Bobby, for they weren’t related, but telling that to Nellie was like asking for a thick ear. Anything that her mate had, she had to have as well. So when Bobby was born they’d settled on making her his adopted grandma.
‘Can I have a nurse now, Nellie?’ Molly asked. ‘Let’s have a look at her new tooth.’ The baby pulled at Molly’s hair and her nose, gurgling with laughter. ‘She doesn’t seem to be bothered by it, so she can’t be in pain.’
Lizzie Corkhill had offered a home to Jill and her then boyfriend, Steve, when she heard they wanted to get married the same day as Doreen to make it a double wedding, but had nowhere to live. And she told herself every day that it was the best thing she ever did.
‘She’s the most pleasant, placid baby I’ve ever known,’ Lizzie said. ‘My Corker cried the whole time he was teething, and look at the size of him now. He’d go mad if he heard me telling yer that, but it’s the truth.’
‘We won’t snitch on yer, Lizzie,’ Nellie said. ‘Not if Jill is going to make us a cup of tea, like I’m sure she is.’
Molly tutted in the baby’s face. ‘Can you hear yer grandma McDonough? She’s a cheeky article, always on the cadge. But nobody minds, really, ’cos she’s very funny and makes us laugh. I’d tell yer I love the bones of her, but she’d hear me and get big-headed.’
Nellie held her arms out. ‘Let me have another cuddle, girl, just for a few minutes. I want to give this little princess a few tips on life. She may as well start early, and who better to teach her than a woman of the world like meself ?’ The baby was punching and kicking as she tried to grab hold of Nellie’s nose. ‘Never mind that now, sweetheart, you just listen to what I’ve got to tell yer. When yer grow up, yer haven’t got to be afraid of asking for something if yer want it. If yer don’t ask, then yer don’t get. Like now, I’ve asked for a cup of tea because I feel like one. And with me cup of tea I’d like a few biscuits. Custard creams if possible, but yer have to take what people give yer, ’cos some folk are miserable and take offence if yer ask. But I’ll give yer more advice as yer grow older, put yer on the right track, like. And now lesson one is over, I’ll pass yer back to Grandma Lizzie, ’cos I can see yer mam coming through with a tray. If yer were a year older, I’d scrounge a custard cream for yer, but ye’re a bit too young yet. But don’t you worry, princess, I’ll see yer never go short. And if yer take after yer grandma McDonough, then yer’ll soon learn the tricks of the trade.’
Molly rolled her eyes to the ceiling. ‘Heaven help her if she takes in everything you tell her, Nellie. Pass her over to me now, and you sit and have yer tea. I’ll try and undo any damage you’ve caused. I know she didn’t understand a word yer said, but I’m not taking any chances.’ Molly held the baby in front of her, so they were looking into each other’s faces. ‘Hello, sunshine, this is yer grandma Molly. And for every lesson yer get off Grandma McDonough, yer’ll be getting one off me.’
Little Moll, as the family called her so there was no confusion with big Molly, was gurgling and chuckling happily. She was a beautiful child, and Molly’s heart was filled with love for her. And with her dad, Steve, being as kind and gentle as her mother Jill, she wouldn’t go far wrong in life. And she would know what it was to be loved, for she was idolized by all the Bennett and McDonough families. Plus, she had a great-grandma and granda, who seemed to have taken on a new lease of life since the birth of Bobby and little Moll.
‘Here, you go to Grandma Lizzie now, sunshine, before my mate empties the plate of biscuits.’ Molly passed the baby over to an
eager Lizzie, then took a seat at the table. ‘I see yer’ve left me an arrowroot and a custard cream, Nellie. That was big of yer.’
‘Never look a gift horse in the mouth, girl. And if yer knew the agony I’ve gone through, resisting the temptation, then yer’d appreciate what a good mate I am to yer.’
‘Ah, I do feel for yer, sunshine. It must have been painful having to sit with yer eyes glued to those two biscuits. And I’ll enjoy them all the more, knowing how much you wanted me to have them.’
‘Have yer been to Doreen’s this morning, Mam?’ Jill asked. ‘Or are yer going there from here?’
Molly glanced at her mate, and wondered whether to tell her daughter and Lizzie about the events of the day so far. But she decided it would take too long, and they’d never get to the shops in time. So she settled for saying, ‘I saw Doreen in the street for a few minutes, sunshine. I asked if she wanted any shopping, but she said she would get her own as she was taking Bobby out for some fresh air.’
‘Oh, I’ll go with her, Mam, ’cos Moll could do with some fresh air too. Will yer give Doreen a knock on yer way past, and tell her to wait for me? I won’t be long getting the baby ready, and can have her in the pram in ten minutes. I feel like a walk, and me and our Doreen can have a good natter. Will yer do that, Mam?’
‘Yes, of course I will, sunshine. Me and Nellie have to pass her house to go to the shops. I’ll tell her to wait for yer.’
‘What are yer having for dinner, girl? Have yer decided yet?’ Nellie’s eyes narrowed as she looked at her mate. ‘Yer’ve had all morning to think about it.’
‘I’m having sausage and mash, sunshine, with lots of fried onions. What about you?’
Nellie feigned surprise, shaking her head as she looked over at Lizzie Corkhill. ‘This is unbelievable, Lizzie, and a stranger would think I was telling fibs if they didn’t know I never tell lies. But me and me mate know exactly what the other one is thinking. Every day, I can guess what Molly is having for her dinner. Like today, I’d made up me mind that my George, and Paul, would love sausage and mash for their dinner, with lots of fried onions. That was at seven o’clock this morning, and I never mentioned it to Molly. And lo and behold, yer’ve just heard what me mate said. Isn’t that just amazing?’
Catching Molly’s wink, Lizzie looked suitably impressed. But she was also blessed with a sense of humour. ‘It certainly is, Nellie. It’s more than amazing.’
Jill was leaning back against the sideboard with a smile on her face. She was used to the tales told by the woman who had once been her much-loved Auntie Nellie, and was now her mother-in-law. And she was also getting used to the woman who had given her and Steve a home. For she too was good at telling tales. Not quite up to Nellie’s standard, but enough to keep the house alive. So when Lizzie held her eyes for a few seconds, Jill knew she was being asked to play along.
Lizzie was nodding her head slowly at Nellie. ‘I’ll tell yer why I think it’s more than amazing, Nellie. Now you just listen to this.’ She raised her brow and asked, ‘Jill, tell yer mother-in-law what we’ve decided to have for dinner tonight?’
Jill bit on the inside of her mouth to keep the laughter at bay while she answered. ‘You know what we’re having, Auntie Lizzie. We’re having sausage and mash, with lots of fried onions.’
The loudest laugh came from Nellie. ‘I don’t know who’s the best bleeding liar. Must be me, I suppose.’
Molly wiped a tear away with the back of her hand. ‘It’s about time someone played you at your own game, sunshine. Good on yer, Lizzie.’
Nellie pretended to be put out. ‘Wait until tomorrow. I’ll have the last laugh. And I hope yer all burn the sausages tonight for spite.’
Little Moll didn’t understand a word, but she understood laughter. And her loud chuckles, and clapping hands, told the four women she enjoyed the joke.
Chapter Two
‘It smells good, Mam,’ Paul McDonough said, his dimples deepening when he smiled. ‘I didn’t know how hungry I was until yer opened the front door.’
Nellie came through from the kitchen carrying a dinner plate in each hand. ‘Yeah, I knew you and George would enjoy them. I told Molly that when we were in the butcher’s and she said it was a good idea, and she bought the same for her dinner.’
Her husband, George, left his fireside chair and moved to sit at the table. He was a well-made man, with black hair and a black moustache, both of which were now speckled with grey. He was a jovial soul, with a smile never far from his face. Which was just as well, seeing he was married to Nellie. He loved her dearly, for she’d given him three children, and had made their home one that was warm and happy. Two of the children were married: Steve their eldest, and Lily the middle one. But both lived in the street with their families, and they were able to see them every day. Paul, their youngest, was twenty-two, and had been courting Phoebe Corkhill for nearly two years now.
Nellie put the plate in front of her husband. ‘I’ve been talking to you, and me fingers were burning holding on to that ruddy plate while you were in dreamland.’
George grinned up at her. ‘D’yer want me to kiss yer fingers better, love? I’ll do that if it makes yer happy. As long as yer wash yer hands first, ’cos how do I know where they’ve been?’
‘Ay, buggerlugs, don’t you be getting sarky with me. It’s bad enough when Molly is, but I don’t mind it so much with her being me best mate. It’s coming to something, though, when the man what married me, and promised to love, honour and obey me, forsaking all others till death do us part, starts being sarcastic. I’ve a good mind to pick that plate up and hit yer on the head with it.’
‘If ye’re going to do that, Mam,’ Paul said, brown eyes twinkling, ‘give us time to take the sausages off first. It’s no good wasting them.’
George pulled a face. ‘Thanks for that, son, it’s nice to know we men stick together. I’ll remember that when I come to make me will out.’ This caused laughter, for it was well known that George liked his pint, and Nellie liked her cream cakes, so there wasn’t likely to be any money over for putting away for a rainy day. None of them were good at saving money; it burned a hole in their pockets. George was generous but not stupid, and would probably have a bit put by if it wasn’t for his wife. He knew if she bought anything for herself, she doubled the price when she asked him for the money. He was soft with her and couldn’t refuse because he always saw her in his mind as the lovely, slim girl, full of life, who had first caught his eye. He’d fallen for her then, and loved her just as much now.
‘Are yer not having any dinner yerself, love?’
‘Of course I am, soft lad. Yer don’t think I’d stand over a hot stove for hours just to feed you and Paul, do yer?’
Paul had his mother’s sense of humour. In fact all her three children took after her for being quick-witted, which is why their house was always filled with laughter. Now he asked, in a matter-of-fact way, ‘Haven’t you had yer dinner, Mam? I thought yer had.’
‘What made yer think that? My plate’s in the kitchen. I’m just going to get it.’
As Nellie turned towards the door, her son pulled on her arm. ‘I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Mam, but ye’re growing a moustache.’
Nellie nearly pushed the table over in her haste to get to the mirror over the fireplace. But she couldn’t see anything below her hair. She stood on tiptoe and jumped up and down, but to no avail. ‘This bleeding mirror isn’t a ha’p’orth of good, George McDonough, I can’t see anything but the top of me head. I’m fed up asking yer to move it. I haven’t seen me face since the day we moved into this house twenty-five years ago. I don’t know what I look like, and wouldn’t know meself if I passed meself in the street.’
George chuckled. ‘There’s not many people could say that, love, and even less would understand even if they could.’
Paul had been holding the laughter in, but now he let it rip. ‘Oh, Mam, ye’re a case. And all yer have to do to get rid of the moustache is sti
ck yer tongue out.’
Nellie glared at him. ‘Ay, smarty pants, any more lip out of you and your sausage will find its way to your head. Yer might be bigger than me, but yer’d never win if it came to blows.’ She took up her fighting stance, with feet apart and hands made into fists. ‘Come on, big boy, let’s see what ye’re made of.’
Always game for a lark, Paul pushed his chair back. He got to his feet, and at six foot he towered above his mother. Nellie was lashing out with her fists, and moving around as though shadow boxing, and saying, ‘Come on, clever clogs, let’s see how brave yer are when ye’re up against a professional.’
Keeping a space of two feet between him and his mother, Paul stretched out his arm and put an open palm on Nellie’s forehead, leaving her throwing blows into the air and dancing on the spot. She looked so comical, George was convulsed with laughter. He took a hankie from his trouser pocket and wiped away the tears running down his cheeks.
‘Oh, dear, oh, dear! I think ye’re fighting a losing battle, love, so if I were in your shoes I’d give in before I ran out of steam.’
Paul thought it was hilarious. ‘Hey, Dad, there’s a key on the mantelpiece belonging to the clock. If yer pass it over, I’ll wind me mam up.’
George had an idea of how to put a stop to it. ‘Nellie, didn’t yer hear the bell go for the end of the first round? Yer’ve been disqualified now for breaking the rules.’
Nellie’s punches slowed down, as did her breathing. She looked up at her son with the fiercest expression on her face she could muster. ‘Think yerself lucky, son, ’cos if the bell hadn’t gone, I’d have made mincemeat of yer.’
Paul opened his arms and Nellie walked into them. ‘Mam, ye’re a smasher and I love yer to bits. I pity anyone who hasn’t got you for a mother, ’cos a house without laughter is a miserable house.’
‘Ay, watch what yer say, son.’ Nellie wagged a chubby finger. ‘If the Bennetts and the Corkhills heard yer saying that, they’d have yer guts for garters.’
