Up the Creek Without a Saddle (Bandit Creek Book 31)
Page 5
Jayce seemed lost in his own thoughts as they meandered through the pleasant streets. He pointed out various places of interest – the sprawling University of Montana campus, and a historic mercantile building where many prominent businessmen got their start in the area’s lucrative gold mining industry. Lily thought for sure Jayce was about to launch into a tirade about the face-offs he has surely had in this very spot, but he was casual as he simply stopped the car alongside the banks of the Clark Fork River in the center of the city.
“This looks like a nice spot for a picnic, don’t you think?” he asked pleasantly.
Lily looked upward at the handful of office towers that surrounded them, stealing a glance at the windows that hid the ruthless tasks taking place behind. She had to pull herself together or she’d miss this opportunity of enjoying the simple pleasures of a picnic with this splendid man. He was very trusting and couldn’t possibly have any idea of what was truly behind her trip to Montana, which only made Lily feel more of a clout as she made her way with Jayce along the deserted river pathway in search of the perfect spot.
As they walked comfortably together, Lily could feel Jayce looking at her. When she ventured a glance upward, she discovered his eyes shining with an intensity that burned a path of desire to her core. He squeezed her hand tighter and the simple gesture launched an even higher pitch of excitement that Lily was sure cast a blush to her cheekbones.
Jayce reached up tenderly to smooth the tendrils of hair away from Lily’s face and she felt his fingers remain for a brief moment at the nape of her neck. His touch shot through her and she was sure he felt her quiver. He pulled her closer and gingerly lifted his hand to her chin, supporting his ability to look deeply into her eyes. He lightly kissed her unexpected tears away. Jayce didn’t seem shocked or uncomfortable to discover her silent tears, but simply continued to hold her tightly, allowing his cheek to lie along hers.
***
With his hand steadily supporting her head, Jayce felt Lily’s body begin to relax. He forced himself to proceed slowly, filled with confusion at her obvious discomfort. He allowed his lips to linger slightly beyond hers for a mere second, and their closeness caused a tiny moan to escape from her parted lips. Jayce quickly opened his eyes to the sound and his body surged more tightly to hers with the stunning glimpse of her lips opening for him. They looked to Jayce like the tantalizing beckon of a ripe fruit.
No longer able to resist her, Jayce touched his lips to the moistness of her mouth. In an instant they were ravenous for one another, hungrily searching velvety mysteries with eager tongues. Jayce could hear the little sighs of Lily’s passion, as she surrendered herself to his touch.
Completely consumed now, Jayce held her head in both his hands to frame her beautiful face and taste the sweetness of her mouth. Fire seemed to dance around them, searing them together as they pressed urgently closer. Jayce reached for the buttons of her summer blouse, longing to feel his flesh against hers. His fingers fumbled with his mounting desire, and he restrained his impulse to simply rip the fabric that hid Lily’s mysteries.
He nibbled the delicacy of her neck and licked at the floral scent he discovered there. She arched her back as his mouth sizzled hungrily along her neck. His breath felt hot against her skin and he was bursting to discover the other secrets which lay beneath her clothing.
Lily’s desire had left a warm glow long her delicate skin. His eyes were hard upon her, and he watched with disappointment as she began to pull away. She felt awkward, he knew, with the confusing sense of remorse and vulnerability that was present from the moment he laid eyes on her. He immediately felt like a clout for his role in the situation. He knew something had been bothering her and he didn’t want her to think he was taking advantage of her. Perhaps he had forced himself on her. He had never taken advantage of a woman and he felt stricken by the idea of hurting this beautiful creature before him.
“Lily,” Jayce said, forcing his voice to sound firm enough to break the emotion of the moment. Both were scrambling now, as Lily fumbled with the buttons of her blouse.
“Lily,” he repeated, placing his hands firmly on each of her arms and forcing her to look up at him. “I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, I’m sorry,” he said softly.
***
Lily studied the ground, unable to continue meeting his gaze. She had already lied to him and coerced him into spending money on her. Now she felt him becoming more attached to her… to the total lie that stood before him. She felt embarrassed and incredibly undeserving of his affection.
“It’s just that I feel so drawn to you,” Jayce continued, beginning to stammer a bit with the explanation of his own behavior. “I really like you,” he concluded softly.
“You don’t even know me,” Lily stated. She knew her words sounded defensive, but she was trying to warn him. She hadn’t intended for the situation to progress as it had, but she had deceived him from the very start and she had to end this sham. Here he was feeling badly for some wrong he thought HE had committed.
“But I really like you,” he repeated softly, innocently, as though this simple truth would rectify the situation.
“But you really don’t know me,” she repeated. The conversation was going nowhere. She was desperate to find a way to start being honest with Jayce. She truly did care for him, although he would never know it by the way she shook her arms free of his hands.
“Look, here I am in Missoula, of all places, with an absolutely enchanting woman who thinks I’m a brute,” Jayce said, sounding frustrated as he looked up to the heavens as if for explanation.
“One minute we’re rolling in the grass like a couple of teenagers and now you’re mad because I don’t know you. I really want to know you, Lily. Let me get to know you.”
She looked sheepishly into the intensity of his gaze and quickly lowered her eyes, shrinking under his attention. Oh my, she wanted nothing more than to tell him the truth right here and now.
“You’re right, I don’t know who you are,” Jayce said again. “But I’d like to.”
“You might not like what you find,” she said, trying to summon her courage to finally tell him the truth.
“I know what you need,” Jayce said suddenly, picking up the picnic basket from where it had been abandoned on the ground. “You need a good, home-cooked meal.”
What? Another distraction, Lily thought. She should just brace herself right this minute, hold up her hands against any further pretense and still the passion in her heart long enough to declare the truth. She dreaded the thought that they might not be able to get past it though, that her secret and their world of differences might be too much to conquer. But she couldn’t stand lying to him any longer. But she couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. But…but…but… She was overwrought with indecision.
“That sounds nice,” was all that managed to come from her lying, deceitful mouth.
Jayce looked intently at her, his eyes reflecting the conflicting emotions she felt in her own heart.
“You see, I was afraid Missoula would be a disappointment to you. I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
“No, you don’t understand,” Lily began, trying to strike a match under her determination once again. “Missoula is just fine… but… liking Missoula has no bearing on… on the real reason I’m here.”
Jayce stopped in his tracks at the intensity of her voice. A fleeting glimmer of fear cast a shadow across his eyes, likely reflecting back from the fear that was surely present in hers. He lifted his hand slowly, seeming to put a distance between the pleasant place they now stood and the place he imagined her next words would take them to.
“You need a good home-cooked meal,” he repeated, obviously searching for safer ground than the one they were now treading.
She would give-over to him once again. Give-over to the moment. Give-over to the visit that she dearly wanted to continue.
“Do you enjoy cooking?” she asked softly, relief allowing her to resume her rol
e of damsel in distress.
“No, but my mom does,” he said, a smile beginning to ease the worry from his face. “Really, she makes enough for the whole neighborhood, because she never knows who is going to be there for any given meal. There’s always someone joining her and Dad around the table, so they’re used to company. And I’d really like them to meet you.”
Lily hesitated, again. This wasn’t a good idea on many, many levels. Wasn’t it too early to be meeting the people in Jayce’s life? Lily was so uncomfortable with the misconception Jayce had of her… surely she couldn’t start sweeping anyone else up in her lies. But it seemed so important to him and maybe it would make her confession a little easier to handle if she told him there at home. “I think that sounds perfect. I’d love to meet them,” she answered, and that part was actually the truth.
They were unrushed as they packed up their untouched afternoon picnic and folded everything back into the truck for the drive back to Bandit Creek.
“Do you need to stop for anything?” Jayce asked politely, once they were finally on the main street.
“I’m not sure,” Lily replied. “Should we take something with us to the house? It feels strange to just appear unannounced like this.”
“Let’s pick up some wine, because I know she’ll have enough food. And she will be very happy to see us, I promise. No announcement necessary,” Jayce smiled.
The purchase was made quickly and they were back on the highway, continuing the short distance to Jayce’s homestead. Lily found herself growing more and more excited, wanting to see Jayce’s home and meet his parents. She even wanted to see his cows again!
Chapter 6
Lily glanced out the window intently, studying the landscape that had provided the steady backdrop of beauty for Jayce while he grew up. His entire way of life, right from his earliest days, was sweet and nurturing and wholesome. No wonder he was such a gentle and trusting man. She was very likely the first dishonest person he had encountered, or at least begun to fall for. And that’s not at all the type of person she was at all. She simply had to tell him the truth and the sooner the better.
“This is where…we first met,” Jayce said suddenly, breaking into her thoughts.
“Yes, I knew it looked familiar here,” Lily said quietly. She looked out to the fields that were rolling by, trying to fight back the nervousness that was always simmering just under the surface.
How could she possibly come clean without ruining this budding relationship? She couldn’t, it was as simple as that. It was impossible to have both a cleaned-up conscience and a chance at spending more time with him. Once he knew she’d betrayed him, he could undoubtedly dump her. Really, she deserved nothing else.
In that instance, Lily knew what she needed to do. What she wanted to do. She would tell him the truth, yes, but she would also follow her confession with her new decision. She would not be following through on the business transaction that she had come to Montana to undertake. She would deal with the consequences later, consequences that included her father’s disappointment at the very least. Perhaps they’d fire her. Could she be fired from the corporation she was destined to own? Whatever, Lily shook the confusing thoughts from her head. Right this minute she knew only one thing for certain: doing the right thing for Jayce mattered more than anything.
“Here are the cows,” he said now, indicating the field Lily was already studying but not really seeing. The sun was low in the sky now, casting shadows along the ground that made a duplicate of every fencepost. The cattle grazed easily on the early grass that was already growing thickly throughout the pasture.
She felt deliciously happy all of a sudden, as relief at her decision swept through her. She looked into the distance, as Jayce drove along the road that was rising into a long hill. Lily noticed the lushness of the valley was turning to parched and tried grass as they rose with the hill.
“What’s happened to all the grass?” Lily asked, absorbing all she could of the sights around her.
“There’s always more moisture in the low-lying areas. This field will catch up, but not until later in the season and not unless we get some rain,” Jayce explained easily. “One section of field can be so different from the other. There are a lot of things that could be done to make this farm more efficient, but my folks are pretty old-fashioned. They haven’t kept up as well as they could have.”
Jayce stopped short all of a sudden, glancing quickly toward Lily, likely to see if this line of conversation was interesting to her.
“Of course,” she said intently, thinking immediately of the sections and sections of cotton fields they owned throughout the states. “I had never given it much thought, the actual growing of the crops.”
“Neither had my parents, I’m afraid,” Jayce continued softly. “They still won’t discuss anything they consider elaborate, even though much of the technology is commonplace now.”
Jayce stopped again, and looked quickly toward Lily.
“It’s good that they’re careful with money, of course, as everyone should be. But they have continued to fall behind on this ranch, just like they did when they owned it. They haven’t kept pace with the economics of farming, with the business part of it. It’s always been a huge enterprise and an expensive one, but we just kept losing more and more ground until we were vulnerable. I saw it coming and it made me so sad that I couldn’t do anything to stop it. The takeover.”
Lily looked at the tender expression on Jayce’s face and wanted to take him in her arms to comfort him. What a tragedy. “I am sorry,” she said softly.
“Well,” Jayce responded, obviously trying to make his voice sound light-hearted. “At least we’re still here. Not like…” he hestitated a moment, obviously trying not to hurt her feelings, “…all those families who had to leave. Not like the people who end up very poor.”
“What would it take to get it back?” Lily asked slowly, still deep in thought. “What would it take to buy back your farm?”
“Money,” Jayce stated, saying the word as if it was the most impossible thing in the world to achieve. “Lots of money.”
He looked over to Lily and smiled lightly, conspiringly, as though she of all people would know how difficult not having money made everything.
“Come on, let’s not talk about sad things anymore. We’re here!”
Of course, he thinks we’re in the same boat, Lily thought, as if being comrades in financial struggles was the one thing they had in common. The truth was going to jeopardize that, she was certain.
Before Lily could stew over her unsettling thoughts any longer, Jayce turned off the main road and onto a winding gravel lane. Some mature pine trees lined both sides of the roadway, creating a canopy for them to pass under.
In many ways, she and Jayce did have a lot in common, she thought. They both came from a strong and lengthy line of agricultural producers. True, they were vastly different crops that created a world of difference in the income they generated, but the sense of family heritage was exactly the same. They came from different lands, but their families had long been the sole custodians of that land. It was a sense of pride for them both, of that Lily was sure.
Jayce pulled the truck up to the front of a large, white wooden cottage and turned off the ignition. He turned to look at Lily and she started for a moment at the look of determination on his friendly face.
“Don’t worry, though, I’m going to get it back,” he stated resolutely. “I am going to buy back this farm,” he said with absolute conviction. He touched his fingertips to Lily’s hand momentarily, before the sound of barking broke the moment. The noise got louder and louder, until a large Black Lab was looking excitedly through Jayce’s window.
“Hello, Butch,” he laughed happily, opening his door to let the friendly dog greet him. “He’s a big suck,” he said to Lily, indicating the massive hound was safe to approach.
Lily walked quickly to Jayce, needing to be close to him to keep her nerves in check. It had
been a long time since she found herself about to meet the family of someone she cared about.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the wild excitement of the dog that came flying at her. It was an old lumbering sort of dog, who met Lily with such glee that its whole body seemed to be moving in different directions. Big as it was, Lily doubted he would ever make a great watchdog. Butch was so friendly, it looked like it would never enter his mind that someone might arrive at the farm to do the family some sort of harm.
The front door of the house opened suddenly, revealing a smiling grey-haired woman.
“Jayce,” she hollered her voice strong and self-assured. She began walking toward them, her long legs making huge strides with every step.
“Hi Mom.” Jayce smiled with obvious affection and folded himself into her embrace.
“Mom, this is Lily,” Jayce said quickly.
“Hello, Lily,” the older woman said good-naturedly, obviously at ease with the unexpected company. She took Lily’s arm and steered her toward the big house. “Come on in and meet everybody else.”
A slight man with a large smile was standing at the door by the time the trio had made its way up the front steps. By his blazing green eyes and bright smile, Lily knew immediately this diminutive man was Jayce’s father. It also become obvious that he comprised the sum total of what Jayce’s mother meant by “everybody else.”
Introductions were made quickly, so as not to delay the serving of tea. The four of them sat down together at a sturdy, but worn wooden table in the large country kitchen. Lily tried to absorb everything around her without seeming to be nosy or impolite. This functional kitchen, with its slats for plates above the working island and its copper pots suspended by hooks from the large hearth at one end of the room, could have come directly from the pages of a country home magazine. But Lily sensed immediately that any semblance of decoration was incidental, and that everything in the kitchen was placed where it would function the most efficiently. It reminded her immediately of the motherly mannequin at the museum.