Christmas Wishes

by Debbie Macomber

  Nate went to school that first year and took every business course available to him. By the end of the following summer, he had set up a kitchen with his mother’s help and opened his own business, which thrived despite his mistakes. The rest was history. By the time he graduated from college, Nate was already a millionaire and his mother was able to retire comfortably. To his credit, he’d resisted the temptation to abandon his education. It had served him well since, and he was glad he’d stuck with it, even though everyone around him seemed to be saying he knew more, from personal experience, than most of the authors of the textbooks did. A fact he was quick to dispute.

  Susannah was enthralled. She’d assumed Nate would be telling this audience what he’d been beating her over the head with from the moment they’d met—that the drive to succeed was all well and good, but worthless if in the process one forgot to enjoy life. However, if that thought was on Nate’s mind, he didn’t voice it. Susannah suspected he’d reserved that philosophy for her and her alone.

  When he returned to his seat, the applause was thunderous. The first thing he did was look at Susannah, who smiled softly, as touched by his story as the rest of the audience was. Not once had he patted himself on the back, or taken credit for the phenomenal success of Rainy Day Cookies. Susannah would almost have preferred it if his talk had been a boring rambling account of his prosperous career. She didn’t want to feel so much admiration for him. It would be easier to get Nate out of her life and her mind if she didn’t.

  The luncheon ended a few minutes later. Gathering up her things, Susannah hoped to make a speedy escape. She should’ve known Nate wouldn’t allow that. Several people had hurried up to the podium to talk to him, but he excused himself and moved to her side.

  “Susannah, could we talk for a minute?”

  She made a show of glancing at her watch, then at her boss. “I have another appointment,” she said stiffly. She secured the strap of her purse over her shoulder and offered him what she hoped was a regretful smile.

  “Your speech was wonderful.”

  “Thank you. So was yours,” she said, then mentioned the one thing that had troubled her. “You never told me about your father’s death.”

  “I’ve never told you I love you, either, but I do.”

  His words, so casual, so calm and serene, were like a blow to her solar plexus. Susannah felt the tears form in her eyes and tried to blink them back. “I…I wish you hadn’t said that.”

  “The way I feel about you isn’t going to change.”

  “I…really have to go,” she said, turning anxiously toward John Hammer. All she wanted to do was escape with her heart intact.

  “Mr. Townsend,” a woman bellowed from the audience. “You’re going to be at the auction tonight, aren’t you?”

  Nate’s gaze slid reluctantly from Susannah to the well-dressed woman on the floor. “I’ll be there,” he called back.

  “I’ll be looking for you,” she said and laughed girlishly.

  Susannah decided the other woman’s laugh resembled the sound an unwell rooster would make. She was tempted to ask Nate exactly what kind of auction he planned to attend where he expected to run into someone who yelled questions across a crowded room. But she ignored the urge, which was just as well.

  “Goodbye, Nate,” she said, moving away.

  “Goodbye, my love.” It wasn’t until she was walking out of the Convention Center that Susannah realized how final his farewell had sounded.

  It was what she wanted, wasn’t it? As far as she was concerned, Nate had proved he wasn’t trustworthy; he had an infuriating habit of keeping secrets. So now that he wasn’t going to see her again, there was absolutely no reason for her to complain. At least that was what Susannah told herself as she headed home, making a short side trip to the Seattle waterfront.

  Within a couple of hours, Emily and Robert would be dropping off Michelle before they went to dinner with Robert’s employer. Once the baby was with her, Susannah reminded herself, she wouldn’t have a chance to worry about Nate or anyone else.

  By the time Emily arrived with her family, Susannah was in a rare mood. She felt light-headed and witty, as though she’d downed something alcoholic, but the strongest thing she’d had all day was coffee.

  “Hi,” she said cheerfully, opening the door. Michelle looked at her with large round eyes and grabbed for her mother’s collar.

  “Sweetheart, this is your auntie Susannah, remember?”

  “Emily, the only thing she remembers is that every time you bring her here, you leave,” Robert said, carrying in the diaper bag and a sack full of blankets and toys.

  “Hello, Robert,” Susannah murmured, kissing him on the cheek. The action surprised her as much as it did her brother-in-law. “I understand congratulations are in order.”

  “For you, too.”

  “Yes, well, it wasn’t that big a deal,” she said, playing down her own success.

  “Not according to the article in the paper.”

  “Oh,” Emily said, whirling around. “Speaking of the paper, I read Nate’s name today.”

  “Yes…we were both speakers at a conference this afternoon.”

  Emily seemed impressed, but Susannah couldn’t be sure if it was because of her or Nate.

  “That wasn’t what I read about him,” Emily continued, focusing her attention on removing the jacket from Michelle’s arms. The child wasn’t being cooperative. “Nate’s involved in the auction.”

  “Da-da!” Michelle cried once her arms were free.

  Robert looked on proudly. “She finally learned my name. Michelle’s first and only word,” he added, beaming. “Da-da loves his baby, yes, he does.”

  It was so unusual to hear Robert using baby talk that for an instant, Susannah didn’t catch what her sister was saying. “What was that?”

  “I’m trying to tell you about the auction,” Emily said again, as if that should explain everything. At Susannah’s puzzled look, she added, “His name was in an article about the auction to benefit the Children’s Home Society.”

  The lightbulb that clicked on inside Susannah’s head was powerful enough to search the night sky. “Not the bachelor auction?” Her question was little more than a husky murmur. No wonder the woman who’d shouted to Nate at the luncheon had been so brazen! She was going to bid on him.

  Slowly, hardly conscious of what she was doing, Susannah lowered her self onto the sofa next to her sister.

  “He didn’t tell you?”

  “No, but then why should he? We’re nothing more than neighbors.”

  “Susannah!”

  Her sister had the annoying ability to turn Susannah’s name into an entire statement just by the way she said it.

  “Honey,” Robert said, studying his watch, “it’s quarter to seven. We’d better leave now if we’re going to be at the restaurant on time. I don’t want to keep my boss waiting.”

  Emily’s glance at Susannah promised a long talk later. At least Susannah had several hours during which to come up with a way of warding off her sister’s questions.

  “Have a good time, you two,” Susannah said lightheartedly, guiding them toward the door, “and don’t worry about a thing.”

  “Bye, Michelle,” Emily said as she waved from the doorway.

  “Tell Mommy goodbye.” Since the baby didn’t seem too inclined to do so, Susannah held up the chubby hand and waved it for her.

  As soon as Emily and Robert had left, Michelle started whimpering softly. Susannah took one look at her niece and her spirits plummeted. Who was she trying to fool? Herself? She’d been miserable and lonely from the moment she’d rejected Nate. Michelle sniffled, and Susannah felt like crying right along with her.

  So the notorious Nate Townsend had done it again—he hadn’t even bothered to mention the bachelor auction. Obviously he’d agreed to this event weeks in advance and it had never even occurred to him to tell her. Oh, sure, he swore undying love to her, but he was willing to let some stran
ge woman buy him. Men, she was quickly learning, were not to be trusted.

  The more Susannah thought back to their previous conversations, the angrier she became. When she’d asked Nate about helping her out with Michelle, he’d casually said he had “something else” this evening. He sure did. Auctioning off his body to the highest bidder!

  “I told him I didn’t want to see him again,” Susannah announced to her niece, her fervor causing her to raise her voice. “That man was trouble from the night we met. You were with me at the time, remember? Don’t we wish we’d known then what we know now?”

  Michelle’s shoulders began to shake, with the effort to either cry or keep from crying. Susannah didn’t know which.

  “He has this habit of hiding things from me—important information. But I’m telling you right now that I’m completely over that man. Any woman who wants him tonight can have him, because I’m not interested.”

  Michelle buried her face against Susannah’s neck.

  “I know exactly how you feel, kid,” she said, stalking the carpet in front of the large picture window. She stared out at the lights and sounds of the city at night. “It’s like you’ve lost your best friend, right?”

  “Da-da.”

  “He’s with your mommy. I thought Nate was my friend once,” she said sadly to the baby. “But I learned the hard way what he really is—nothing earth-shattering, don’t misunderstand me. But he let me make a complete idiot of myself. And…and he doesn’t trust me enough to tell me anything important.”

  Michelle looked at Susannah wide-eyed, apparently enthralled with her speech. In an effort to keep the baby appeased, she continued chattering. “I hope he feels like a fool on the auction block tonight,” she said as she imagined him standing in front of an auditorium full of screaming women. She slowly released a sigh, knowing that with his good looks, Nate would probably bring in top money. In past auctions, several of the men had gone for thousands of dollars. All for an evening in the company of one of Seattle’s eligible bachelors.

  “So much for love and devotion,” she muttered. Michelle watched her solemnly, and Susannah felt it was her duty as the baby’s aunt to give her some free advice. “Men aren’t all they’re cracked up to be. You’d be wise to figure that out now.”

  Michelle gurgled cheerfully, obviously in full agreement.

  “I for one don’t need a man. I’m totally happy living on my own. I’ve got a job, a really good job, and a few close friends—mostly people I work with—and of course your mother.” Michelle raised her hand to Susannah’s face and rubbed her cheek where a tear had streaked a moist trail.

  “I know what you’re thinking,” Susannah added, although it was unnecessary to explain all that to anyone so young. “If I’m so happy, then why am I crying? Darned if I know. The problem is I can’t help loving him and that’s what makes this so difficult. Then he had to go and write that note on a napkin.” She brought her fingers to her mouth, trying to calm herself. “He asked me if I was willing to live my life without a husband…on a napkin he asked me that. Can you imagine what the caterers are going to think when they read it? And we were sitting at the head table, no less.”

  “Da-da.”

  “He asked about that, too,” Susannah said, sniffling as she spoke. She was silent a moment and when she began again her voice trembled slightly. “I never thought I’d want children, but then I didn’t realize how much I could love a little one like you.” Holding the baby against her breast, Susannah closed her eyes to the pain that clawed at her. “I’m so mad at that man.”

  Fascinated by Susannah’s hair, Michelle reached up and tugged it free from the confining pins.

  “I wore it up this afternoon to be contrary—and to prove to myself that I’m my own woman. Then he was there and the whole time I was speaking I wished I’d left it down—just because Nate prefers it that way. Oh, honestly, Michelle, I think I may be ready to go off the deep end here. Any advice you’d care to give me?”

  “Da-da.”

  “That’s what I thought you’d say.” Forcing in a deep breath, Susannah tried to control the tears that sprang to her eyes. She hadn’t expected to cry.

  “I really believed that once I was promoted to vice president everything would be so wonderful and, well, it has been good, but I feel…empty inside. Oh, Michelle, I don’t know if I can explain it. The nights are so long and there are only so many hours I can work without thinking about getting home and the possibility of seeing Nate. I…I seem to have lost my drive. Here I was talking to all these people today about determination and drive and discipline, and none of it seemed real. Then…then on the way home I was walking along the waterfront and I saw an old college friend. She’s married and has a baby a little older than you and she looked so happy.” She paused long enough to rub the back of her hand under her nose. “I told her all about my big promotion and Sally seemed genuinely happy for me, but I felt this giant hole inside.”

  “Da-da.”

  “Michelle, can’t you learn another word? Please. How about Auntie? It’s not so difficult. Say it after me. Auntie.”

  “Da-da.”

  “Nate’s probably going to meet some gorgeous blonde and fall madly in love with her. She’ll bid thousands of dollars for him and he’ll be so impressed he won’t even mind when she—” Susannah stopped, her mind whirling. “You won’t believe what I was thinking,” she said to Michelle, who was studying her curiously. “It’s completely crazy, but…perhaps not.”

  Michelle waved her arms and actually seemed interested in hearing about this insane idea that had popped into Susannah’s head. It was impossible. Absurd. But then she’d made a fool of herself over Nate so many times that once more certainly wasn’t going to hurt.

  It took several minutes to get Michelle back into her coat. Susannah would’ve sworn the thing had more arms than an octopus.

  After glancing at the balance in her checkbook, she grabbed her savings-account records and, carrying Michelle, headed to the parking garage. She’d been saving up to pay cash for a new car, but bidding for Nate was more important.

  The parking lot outside the theater where the bachelor auction was being held was full, and Susannah had a terrible time finding a place to leave her car. Once she was inside the main entrance, the doorman was hesitant to let her into the auditorium, since Michelle was with her and neither one of them had a ticket.

  “Ma’am, I’m sorry, I can’t let you in there without a ticket and a bidding number—besides I don’t think married women are allowed.”

  “I’ll buy one and this is my niece. Now, either you let me in there or…or you’ll…I’ll…I don’t know what I’ll do. Please,” she begged. “This is a matter of life and death.” Okay, so that was a slight exaggeration.

  While the doorman conferred with his supervisor, Susannah looked through the swinging doors that led into the theater. She watched as several women raised their hands, and leaped enthusiastically to their feet to show their numbers. A television crew was there taping the proceedings, as well.

  Susannah was impatiently bouncing Michelle on her hip when the doorman returned.

  “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but my supervisor says the tickets are sold out.”

  Susannah was about to argue with him when she heard the master of ceremonies call out Nate’s name. A fervent murmur rose from the crowd.

  Desperate times demanded desperate measures, and instead of demurely going back outside, Susannah rushed to the swinging doors, shoved them open and hurried down the narrow aisle.

  As soon as the doorman saw what she’d done, he ran after her, shouting, “Stop that woman!”

  The master of ceremonies ceased speaking, and a hush fell over the room as every head in the place turned toward Susannah, who was clutching Michelle protectively to her chest. She’d made it halfway down the center aisle before the doorman caught up with her. Susannah cast a wretched pleading glance at Nate, who had shielded his eyes from the glare of the lights and wa
s staring at her.

  Michelle cooed and with her pudgy hand, pointed toward Nate.

  “Da-da! Da-da!” she cried, and her voice echoed loudly in the auditorium.

  Chapter

  11

  An immediate uproar rose from the theater full of women. Nothing Susannah did could distract Michelle from pointing toward Nate and calling him Da-da. For his part, Nate appeared to be taking all the commotion in his stride. He walked over to the master of ceremonies, whom Susannah recognized as Cliff Dolittle, a local television personality, and whispered something in his ear.

  “What seems to be the problem?” Cliff asked the doorman.

  “This lady doesn’t have a ticket or a bidding number,” he shouted back. He clutched Susannah’s upper arm and didn’t look any too pleased with this unexpected turn of events.

  “I may not have a number, but I’ve got $6010.12 I’d like to bid for this man,” she shouted.

  Her announcement was again followed by a hubbub of whispering voices, which rolled over the theater like a wave crashing onto the shore. That six thousand was the balance in Susannah’s savings account, plus all the cash she had with her.

  A noise from the back of the room distracted her, and that was when she realized the television crew had the cameras rolling. Every single detail of this debacle was being documented.

  “I have a bid of $6010.12,” Cliff Dolittle announced, sounding a little shocked. “Going once, going twice—” he paused and scanned the female audience “—sold to the lady who gate-crashed this auction. The one with the baby in her arms.”

  The doorman released Susannah and reluctantly directed her to where she was supposed to pay. It seemed that everyone was watching her and whispering. Several of the women were bold enough to shout bits of advice to her.

  A man with a camera balanced on his shoulder hurried toward her. Loving the attention, Michelle pointed her finger at the lens and cried “Da-da” once more for all the people who would soon be viewing this disaster at home.